rp# 3 (alpha/beta) Showing 301-350 of 1,507

[Nepeta]

TG: WTF? WRTF? WTF? WTF?

TG: So if ros and dav are sibs, dat meanz dirdk and me are cuzins! WEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[Nepeta]

TG: NAH! AH HALL NAW!
TG: bu wer da last 2 ppl alive? wat, how can we be-

Roxy puked in her trash can. This all had to be a lie.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: oh god what is wrong with our lives..?
EB: maybe your timeline is wrong. you and dirk. Jane and jake.. the four of us should be able to marry differently, incest-free. the problem comes from when we think about your parents.

[Nepeta]

Roxy was crying hard now.

TG: IZ NUT TRU! IZ NUT TRU!

She threw her stapler at the wall.

TG: No...dirdk and me r gunna get 2gedder.

[Nepeta]

TG: Whut if dis is all just a drim?

[Nepeta]

TG: And cuzins? wtf? No, ew no wai! EWWWWWWWW

Roxy stared at herself in the mirror. She looked nothing like Dirk, though!

[Nepeta]

TG: No, I will nut du it wif my cuzin/brother thingie...unless........

Roxy thought hard for a while. And farted.
NO ONE WAS RELATED IN THIS UNIVERSE! She jumped up in the air in happiness.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

John covered his face with his hands, trying not to cry. This just wasn't right. Wasn't fair to any of them. Jade loved Dave, and he liked... No it just wasn't fair to anyone. Or to their parents. But if it didn't happen then how would if effect the other timelines? Trying to mix them made things so complicated...!
EB: i think jade's right.

[Nepeta]

TG: Guiz, were in 2 totalee diffrnt universes....

[Nepeta]

TG: GUIZ! Will u lisn 2 me?

TG: Were plaing 2 diff gams.

Of course.

TG: And...in dis, dirdk in me r da last 2 ppl alive.

[Nepeta]

TG: I fink I am....

Oh, gog no, Jane, that idiot! THIS WAS ALL HER FAULT!

TG: JANE YOU STUPID B*TCH!

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: don't be h8in on my nanna/possible alternate universe daughter/mom!!!!
EB: again, Jade is right. It's just mixed up. you're in a different session.

[Nepeta]

TG: DATS WAT I JUST SAD, EGBOOB! JUST LICK UR STUPID GRAMA

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

John, taken aback, was doing his best not to type equally hurtful comments back to Roxy. Only stopping because it would be downright mean to bring up her love life, and he didn't play like that.
EB: yeah, I'm like my nanna, you can just deal with it!
EB: she was a great and lovable person and if I'm gifted enough to be like her then that's a blessing for me!!

[Nepeta]

TG: YOUR NANA WAS A B*TCH! SHE'S THE ONE WHO HAD 2 RUIN EVRYTHING FOR ME, SNAGGING DIRK AND JAKE FIOR HERSELF!

[Nepeta]

TG: JOH, U COMPLETE IDIOT!!!!!!!!
TG: NAH, JANEY IS A WH*RE! SHE STLZ ALL DA GUIZ DAT I LIKE!

[Nepeta]

Roxy hugged her pillow and screamed into it.
TG: AND DIRDK AND JAKE FOLLOWED HER BCUZ SHE IZ A SEX GODDESS!
The vodka had certainly gone to her head already.

[Nepeta]

TG: FREAKING SEX GODDESS!

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: OKAY THAT IS ENOUGH!!
EB: I DON'T REALLY CARE WHO THINKS IM STUPID, SINCE I ALREADY DEAL WITH THAT INSULT ON A FREAKING DAILY BASIS!
EB: KNOCK IT OFF WITH MY GRANDMA OKAY?! SHE'S NOT THE KIND OF PERSON WHO WOULD DO THINGS LIKE THAT!! JUST BECAUSE SHE'S PRETTY AND GOOD WITH PEOPLE DOES NOT MEAN SHE'S A SLUT OR ANYTHING INDECENT!
John breathed out angrily. God he sounded like Karkat.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

John leaned back and exhaled softly. This had drained him so much..! He closed his eyes and sighed. He was acting like Karkat..! Ridiculous... Well with less swearing, anyway.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: sorry Jade. i got really mad for a second there.
EB: dave's gonna flip out when he sees how I yelled at his mom.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: i feel bad now. i shouldn't have gotten so upset. she's probably just confused and heartsick.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: you can say that again.
EB: i h8 all this.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: Vriska. she says she manipul8 people's minds; and likes spiders and luck. she's mean 8ut nice at the same time.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: yeah. we haven't talked for a while though...meh.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: hehe, Karkat's funny. he's mad almost all the time..!
EB: did you know he likes to watch romantic comedies?

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: i know right?!when I asked him about it, he just called me stupid and told me I wouldn't understand the plot, lol.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: hehe yeah. it was really complicated and I'm pretty sure I zoned out in the middle of it.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: I wish I could see that..! careful though, that stuff's scarring

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: that sounds about right. weird.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: how are your squiddles doing?

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: yep! it'd be great to get one! maybe I should try making you one as a gift.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: I'll send you the address l8r. i know better than to put where I live on a public chatroom, hehe.

[Nepeta]

TG: IM BACK!

Roxy was being such a troll today! She was drunk and crying.

TG: HULL? I am sorrie john for clling ur grama a sex goddess

[Elle]

TG: Woah....you want me to explain paradoxes?

This was some serious crap. Dave took off his sunglasses

TG: Okay, the only possible explaination is that our ancestors live in a really strange world were they're all related...and they're not.

TG: Also, I didn't know your g-ma was a sex goddess, John.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: yep. i guess that's just as logical. we'll just have to wait and do things for ourselves.
EB: no Dave, she's not a sex goddess, don't get any weird coolkid ideas.

[Nepeta]

TG: Oh, John, ur grama has a fine ol' rack on her.

Roxy stared at her own flat chest and held back tears.

TG: Ur grama has manged to seduze dirdk and jaeke.

[Nepeta]

TG: NAH WRE NUT! Jade, duz ross have big boobies?

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

John blushed a little, at the question. Why did girls talk about stuff like this so openly in public chat rooms no less?!
EB: maybe now's not the time to be talking about stuff like this.

[Nepeta]

TG: JOHN, DUS ROSS HAVE BIG BOOZISES?

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: dave what is it with you and hitting on everything that breathes?!
EB: yeah I'll send you a picture, but seriously why are we even talking about this? everyone's special in their own way.
John facepalmed a little. He sounded like a flipping psychiatrist. He emailed a picture to Dave.

[Elle]

TG: It's not my fault that ladies can't resist the d*ck of sexiness. A lovely young woman is currently on her knees i-
TG: :P

He opened up the picture of his sister. Oh, damn, they looked alike. He did a double take. Her hair was a little lighter than his, but they looked IDENTICAL.

[Nepeta]

TG: ROSSS HAS BIB BOOBIEZ?!

Her own daughter had boobs and she didn't? Not fair.

TG: WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYY???? I want to b prtty too!

[Nepeta]

TG: Bcuz jade, ur grama has big ones. like as big as da statu of libry
*library
*liberty

[Elle]

TG: Correction, my dear Jade, big boobs make great pillows, therefore, my bro and I prefer them.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

John blushed more at seeing all this talk of Rose, and just the subject in general.
EB: wth dave stop acting like a player. scratch that, stop BEING such a player.
EB: roxy, don't worry. rose is really pretty, but so are you. don't think about it too much. you are yourself, and the only thing you can do is be positive. believe you're beautiful.
Oh great. Welcome to another therapy Session with Dr. Egderp. He headdesked a little at how corny the words seemed.

[Nepeta]

TG: I dunno. I have none! How da hall am I sppsd 2 feed ma childrenz?!

Roxy began to cry even harder.

TG: Im nut pretty. shez a natrul blonde :( And i just go thru 5 bottles of dyez a day, lick dave sad.

[E, adventurin and derping all at once]

EB: I bet if you didn't dye your hair you'd look just as pretty. judging prettiness on hair color can be superficial.
EB: my hair's super dark. and so is Jade's, and there's nothing wrong with that. rose and Dave have light hair, that's just them.

[Elle]

TG: My hair is sexy and you know that, Egbert.
TG: And I'm the sexiest player in the entire world.

Dave took off his shirt. Like that dude from Twilight.

TG: My bro has like...really light hair. It's almost white.

[Nepeta]

TG: Rly? RLY?!

Roxy stared at her dyed locks. Her natural color was a light brown, but she hated that color.

TG: Is ur hair like, light broon
*brown john?

She stared at Jade's post.

TG: SO DEN, WEN ARE DIRDK AND I GUNNA DO IT? But Janeys will stteel be biggr den mine.