Ducky's...Stuff

[Jocelyn]

Now I have my own thread. Yay!!!

[Jocelyn]

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

My poem is called "Proud Of It" and I am. It would be a big help if you all read it and gave me your opinions. Thanksies!

[Jocelyn]

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

It would also be a big help if you guys read this and told me if you liked my plot or not. Thanksies again! And for those of you who want an example of my little World Planning, it's here too.

[Kyra]

Ducky wrote: "http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

It would also be a big help if you guys read this and told me if you liked my plot or not. Thanksies..."

Just scrolled through, and it sounds great so far. Like it's ready for pot definition.

[Loegwen]

I really like your poem, and I'm excited to see what you're going to come up with for the Song of Eron thing.

[Jocelyn]

How about this?

There's a character who always disobeys the rules and always gets in trouble for it. Then, something happens that makes everyone have to rely on them. Sorry, I haven't thought about it much. But the good news? I'm back from camp! And the bad news? I'm in Tahoe.

[Mel]

DUCKY!!! HI!!! Where's that?

[Kyra]

Tahoe? It's in California. Her family owns a cabin up there. It's really pretty!!! Big lake, sprawling forest, fresh mountain air... that kind of place.

[Mel]

Wow, that's cool! Aaaaaaaall the way in California. Wow. Robert Pattinson lives in California... XD <3

[Kyra]

I live in San Jose. Who's Robert Pattison???

[Mel]

Robert Pattinson is the hottest guy alive. In my opinion, anyways. he plays Edward Cullen in Twilight. Soooooooo hot!!!!!!: http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__c...
That's him as Edward. Gorgeous. <3 <3 <3

[Jocelyn]

Ahh. Twilight. That explains it. XD

Kyra! I got 2 kayaks and a canoe!!!! tee hee!!

[Kyra]

WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!
YOU ARE TAKING ME TO TAHOE AND LETTING ME USE THEM! EFFECT IMMEDIATELY!!!!!!!!!!

[Jocelyn]

*rubs hands together* Now I've got blackmail!!!!

[Robin]

HI!
I JUST GOT BACK FROM PLACES WHERE I WAS DOING STUFF. AND THERE WAS NO WIFI!!
Anyway, good day!

[Jocelyn]

No wifi? That's terrible!!!!!!! XD

[Robin]

It was sad. Really sad. =

[Jocelyn]

I can imagine.

[Kyra]

Ducky wrote: "*rubs hands together* Now I've got blackmail!!!!"


(glares) Try that, and I will make you read the Artemis Fowl series. Somehow.

[Jocelyn]

You'll have more luck with mustard water.

Now we're even. XD

[Mel]

Yick. Mustard water. Isn't that the disgusting stuff that comes out of the mustard bottle when you don't shake it? :P

[Kyra]

(laughing) No, that's what you get when Ducky mixes water and mustard together to give to her sister for April Fools, then is stupid enough to try herself and nearly throws up. XD It's also a miracle substance Nikara likes to use to blackmail Nightshade.

[Mel]

XD

[Jocelyn]

*blushes* Turns out my sister actually likes that stuff. I didn't speak to her all day after she told me that.

[Kyra]

(staring) She... likes... mustard water???
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jocelyn]

It's true!

[Jocelyn]

Okay, in addition to "Proud of It," I now have something else for you all to critique.

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

It's totally dystopian, wouldn't you agree? XD

[Jocelyn]

Guys!!! Critique my writing please! I'm impatient to hear what y'all think!!!

[Mel]

Okay! This is a very interesting idea for a Dystopian. I liked how it was kinda mysterious in the beginning, like not telling who everybody is right off, or what the main character is doing. It always pulls the reader in more when you don't tell them too much in the beginning. One thing you don't have to do is list all the countdown numbers. You can shorten it a little more and the readers will still get the point. I liked how she named the monotone electronic voice thingy. ;)

[Jocelyn]

Of course, because that's what all normal people do. XD

[Mel]

XD I'd probably name it Bob, but I name everything Bob... XD

[Kyra]

LOL!!!!!
You know what you should've named it, Ducky? BUBBLES!!!!!!!!

[Jocelyn]

I added a little bit more. Not much, but a little.

[Kyra]

(holding up a finger) Gimme a sec. Lots. Of. Homework.