Need to rant?

[Becky]

Oh no! I hope that they have good enough judgement to keep you around Kandice! *crossing my fingers for you* (although that makes it kinda hard to type)

[Kandice]

No, I am being let go as well. Everyone in our entire building! Thank you, Becky.

[Becky]

Oh... That sucks. I'm sorry!

(Want me to beat them up? I'll do it!)

[Kandice]

Thank you so much, sweetie. No. I completely understand. The economy is just so bad that they don't need us to put out the little fires any more. They are hoping people wont want to pursue smaller issues in court, so really, I'm not needed. I just feel so bad for a lot of the younger people I work with. This is the only job some of them have had. They expected this to be their career.

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

Sorry, Kandice. The California economy is really in the dumpers. I hope things get better soon. Did you feel the earthquake(s) yesterday/today?

[Kandice]

Thanks Fiona.

No, we didn't feel the earthquakes here. I didn't even hear of any, but I didn't listen or watch the news yesterday.

[Becky]

Kandice wrote: "Thank you so much, sweetie. No. I completely understand. The economy is just so bad that they don't need us to put out the little fires any more. They are hoping people wont want to pursue smaller ..."

...And this is why you're a gorgeous soul. :)

[Kandice]

Awww... I'm blushing and tearing up a little. It's been happening all day. (thanks Becky xo)

[Emma]

Aw Kandice, that's really too bad.

*hugs*

Hope you feel better.

[Emma]

I had a big realization yesterday and I feel like I can FINALLY get out of the rut I've been in since last year. YAY.

[Becky]

Kandice wrote: "Awww... I'm blushing and tearing up a little. It's been happening all day. (thanks Becky xo)"

I only said it cuz it's true. *shuffles feet*

[KHoopMan]

RANT: I feel like my entire life is wasting away while I work 60-70 hours a week. I never do anything fun anymore! I went to a movie with my friend last night (Duplicity, it was fantasically witty and smart) and I felt bad-ass for getting out of the house on a weeknight!! I was in bed by 9:30pm and that's my sad little adventure for the week. How pathetic am I? I need some of Emma's energy to get out of this rut.

[Esther]

Eliza wrote: "RANT: I feel like my entire life is wasting away while I work 60-70 hours a week. I never do anything fun anymore! I went to a movie with my friend last night (Duplicity, it was fantasically wit..."

I often have this kind of guilt. Not being the world's most diligent housewife I feel guilty reading or going out for a coffee with friends when I could be cleaning the bathroom or tidying a messy room.

Kandice you are a treasure. If I had the money I would employ you to keep writing on GR just to reassure the rest of us that there are some really lovely people in this world.

[Esther]

I felt like ranting earlier this week and was so distracted I forget this thread.
I'm still pretty riled up so - here we go.

I'm organising my daughter's Bat Mitzvah. This includes snacks for 50-80 after services on Friday night, a full meal for 12 on Friday night, brunch for guests after services on Saturday (I thought there would be about 50 people but everyone has said yes so it's closer to 80!)
I am catering it, with a little help from friends.
It is a little tiring and the planning is a little stressful but this is not the first, or even the 10th, time I have catered such an event.

However my rant is about people who think, this week of all weeks, that my life should be sacrificed to their needs:
The Head Librarian, who is a bit of a hypochondriac, phoning up to see if I could come in on my day off because she is feeling sick - big sigh!

The boss who grumbles that the library is closed because I can't cover for my sick colleague but cut my hours to 15/week (by law it should be 40/week) because she doesn't think a library is 'worth it'.

And the girl who wanted English lessons before an exam. I squeezed 2.5 hours into my busy schedule and despite explaining twice that I was busy she phoned, as I was dashing out the door, to ask if I couldn't just rearrange my schedule again to give her one more lesson.
I told her I would be home by midnight if that was a convenient time. I think she got the message.

[Kandice]

Thank you Esther. You guys have done a lovely job of cheering me up. :) :) :)

[Kandice]

Esther, I have noticed that the more you do for some people, the more times you rearrange, the more they expect. It feels good to be helpful, but don;t get trod upon! I think your answer to the girl about midnight was perfect!

Good luck with the Bat Mitzvah. What food are you serving?

[Ashley]

Elizabeth wrote: "I think it's the green stuff that bothers me. If you're Protestant Irish, you're Orange."

I just barely found this discussion, (which I love BTW, great idea!). Anyway, before there was a lot of posting about St. Patrick's Day. I could be wrong, because I am not Catholic, or Irish, but isn't St. Patrick's Day a Catholic holiday? As far as I know, Protestant religions don't really offer Sainthood to people, which would explain the green. Irish Catholic IS green. Orange would be a contradiction, and is actually worn by some Protestants in Ireland as a protest.

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

My rant today is that there is a new thread here. It's in the Do You Want To Discuss This Novel folder on Empire Falls, and it says it has spoilers. I am studiously avoiding reading this book just now because I'm only reading stuff that fits the Spring Challenge. I soooo want to peak into that discussion and find out what people are saying about this book. OK, so I'm laughing at myself over this, but still . . .

[Esther]

Kandice wrote: "Esther.....Good luck with the Bat Mitzvah. What food are you serving?"

Friday after services is snacks so there has to be potato chips and fizzy drinks. I have also made cup cakes - chocolate choco chip, coconut Strawberry jam & almond citrus - and some savoury cheese biscuits.

Friday night meal is roast chicken with roast potatoes and meatballs with peas. My parents are doing Mediterranean type salads to help out and my father-in-law will doubtless bring wine.
Saturday is dairy so I am getting cheese platters from two local dairies that specialise in goat's cheese. The local baker, a friend, is making 4 dozen bite size rolls and pita.
I have made 5 quiches - 2 plain, 2 spinach & red pepper, 1 sweetcorn - an Israeli salad, pasta salad and tabouleh. My parents will also be making some salads.
For dessert a friend is making a carrot cake and I have made 4 chocolate marble cheesecakes. I have bought an enormous chocolate mousse cake as the 'birthday cake'.

I just hope it will be enough!

[Kandice]

OMG!!!! I so wish I could come and eat all that food. If the food is really good, there can never be enough, so don't worry on that account. I will keep my fingers crossed (well, not ALL weekend) that things go well for you:)

[Becky]

That sucks, SBG. I have terrible vision too, so I know how you feel. Luckily, I have contacts and glasses, so if my glasses were to break I would have a back-up. Good luck!

[Becky]

I agree with you about Lasik. My mom had the procedure done probably 10 years ago or so, and she still sees great, but she knows that she will have to get reading glasses some day and she's dreading it. My mom is pretty young though - only 44 - so I think that she just doesn't want people to think that she's older than she is.

They have really improved it since then though, from what I understand. As soon as I can afford it, I want to have it done. It would definitely make my life a lot easier!

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

I was extremely near-sighted for many years. When I was in high school, contacts finally became small enough to be dispensed to the general public and somehow my mother was able to afford for me to get them. These were hard contacts. Then the soft contacts came out and just as I was about to ask the opthalmologist about them, he told me too bad you can't wear them, they won't correct vision this poor. So I wore the hard lenses and sometimes my glasses for about 40 years. Toward the end of this time they were beginning to do Lasik surgery, but, again, my vision was too poor. About 10 years ago I was diagnosed with fast-growing cataracts. Now many people would be a bit dismayed by this prospect. Not me. For cataract surgery, now when they remove the clouded lens, they implant a lens complete with the proper correction. Amazing. Now I can see the alarm clock on the bedstead, among other things, but I do not need glasses to drive. Yes, I have to wear reading glasses. Not the worst thing to happen, as I needed them anyway. Sometime after you age beyond 40, you lose the ability to change focus from far to near. I have empathy for all of you who are so near-sighted.

[Sara ♥]

Elizabeth (Alaska) wrote: "For cataract surgery, now when they remove the clouded lens, they implant a lens complete with the proper correction. Amazing. Now I can see the alarm clock on the bedstead, among other things, but I do not need glasses to drive. Yes, I have to wear reading glasses. Not the worst thing to happen, as I needed them anyway. Sometime after you age beyond 40, you lose the ability to change focus from far to near. I have empathy for all of you who are so near-sighted. "

What would it be like to be able to see the clock on my dresser (across the room)? WOW. I love my glasses though. Plastic frames don't bend as easily as metal ones (so when I fall asleep in them...), and they make so many great-looking plastic frames now.

Not to long ago my ridiculously expensive prescription sunglasses (how do I get talked into these things?) snapped right in half, at the nosepiece... Fortunately, the place I got them covers repairs for a year--but they had to ship them back to the Maui Jim continental US headquarters in... Illinois... so it took like 2 weeks to get them back!

Anyway, I was going to say something about reading glasses. In my physics class in college, we studied optics--specifically about how light bounces off eye lenses. When you get older, your eyes' lenses become more rigid, so they can't focus as quickly or as well. Your "near point" (the smallest distance at which you can clearly focus) gets farther away, so you need glasses to move that near point closer to you--so you can do things like... oh... say... read tons of books for the Spring Challenge.. :)

And that's almost everything I know about eyes! ;)

[Becky]

On an unrelated note, I'm ranting about this stupid cough that I've had for 3 days now. I'm no longer sick, but this cough just WILL NOT go away!! It's to the point that my throat is raw and I'm getting abs of steel and an unending headache.

It's almost 4 am, but am I asleep? No. I'm coughing. So, I've loaded a hot cup of green tea with almost more honey than water in the hopes that it will coat my throat so I can get to sleep.

Stupid miserable cough.

[Esther]

Saved By Grace wrote: "Glasses rant:
WHY? I took a nap earlier today and set my glasses on the bed, when I woke up they were on the floor and I put them on, they felt really weird, they didn't fit right. I was (careful..."

I have terrible eyesight - it is frightening how little I can see without them. get quite panicky when they fall off the beside table and I have to search for them. I was kind of glad when I had to wear glasses permanently because at least then they never got lost because they are always on my nose.

I had to give up on contacts when I was pregnant with my son because the build up of calcium/protein in my tears created tiny stalactites on the inside of the lens that scratched my eyes. They 'grew' so quickly that even weekly cleaning wasn't enough.

A few months ago my glasses broke and I was scared to leave the house because just crossing the road felt like Russian Roulette. Eventually I found an old pair.
Luckily my optician is great and gets prescriptions made up in days and repairs fixed in hours.

[Susanna - Censored by GoodReads]

I am seriously nearsighted - my focus point is about a foot from the end of my nose.

But I've been wearing glasses since I was nine; it would almost fell weird now, if I weren't.

I guess the up side of it is that I hardly ever lose them, because I'm always wearing them unless I'm asleep or in the shower.

[Kandice]

I wear glasses and contacts. Well, not at the same time! But, I have broken my glasses so often, it really is horrible to not be able to see. I keep even my old ones now just in case. My husband teases me, because I don't even like to shower without my contacts in. I am THAT blind!

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

Oh, Kandice, I was so glad to get contacts as a teenager so I could see to shave my legs. Yes, my contacts went in first thing in the morning!

[Susanna - Censored by GoodReads]

I always keep an old pair as my "emergency glasses" after I broke mine while I was having my stroke. Trying to keep on a taped-up pair while only having the use of one arm/hand was... interesting.

[Jeane]

Kandice wrote: "I wear glasses and contacts. Well, not at the same time! But, I have broken my glasses so often, it really is horrible to not be able to see. I keep even my old ones now just in case. My husband te..."

I got contactlenses after being an au pair for a year and didn't wanted to get my glasses broken while playing with two little kids.

[Sara ♥]

Elizabeth (Alaska) wrote: "Oh, Kandice, I was so glad to get contacts as a teenager so I could see to shave my legs. Yes, my contacts went in first thing in the morning!"

Hahaha! Oh gosh... Sometimes I'll put my glasses back on so I can see my legs to shave them.... I'm so glad I'm not the only person who has this issue!

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

Well, Sara, it's the opposite issue now, but the same solution. Now I have to put on my reading glasses to shave my legs!

[Esther]

Kandice wrote: "....I don't even like to shower without my contacts in"

My focus point is about 2 inches from the end of my nose and only really clear with one eye closed because the difference between the eyes and the fact that I have astigmatism in only one eye.

The other day I got out of the shower after a hard day, put on my glasses, dressed and then looked down at my sandaled feet - they were still grimy.
I was so perplexed as I had just showered but then removed my glasses and my feet turned into fuzzy beige blobs. In the shower I just hadn't been able to see that my feet needed some extra attention.

Now before getting in the shower I give myself a quick 'once over' with my glasses on to see which bits need an extra scrub :0(

[Becky]

I am so mad at myself right now. I just drove all the way from work to the gym, fully intending to work off that cheesesteak I had for lunch, and I get there and THEN realize that I left my stupid tennis shoes at home when I left this morning. Grrr!!

So tomorrow I get to make up for lost time AND a cheesesteak. Great.

[April]

My stupid roommate does not understand the simple concept of clean up after yourself. I'm sick of being his personal maid, but I don't like our apartment to be dirty. I mean if trash was overflowing, wouldn't you say to yourself, gee, my chore is to take the trash out hmm looks like today is the day to do it since it's overflowing.
I'm really not a neatfreak, but picking up after him is cutting into my reading time :-( I could be spending that time with George Orwell or meeting Jodi Piccoult or finally getting around to Charlaine Harris! FML.

[Esther]

April wrote: "My stupid roommate does not understand the simple concept of clean up after yourself. I'm sick of being his personal maid, but I don't like our apartment to be dirty. I mean if trash was overflowin..."

My kids are the same. When the bin is full they throw rubbish on the floor and look at me blankly when I ask if it didn't occur to them to take the rubbish out (their one and only chore).

Oh and kids when I ask 'Are those clothes dirty?' Nasty chocolate milk stains down the front constitute 'dirty' not 'fit to wear for at least another day'!

[Jeane]

I have the same problem with housemates....okay that we have different nationalities and that the levels of cleaness or different. But if the bad is full with long black hair and you are the only one int he house with long black hair....maybe clean it afterwards. When you do things in the kitchen and the floor, table, chairs are black instead of brown like before.....might mean that you can clean it and bring the original color back.....

[Jeane]

yes, my saturday morning would be cleaning!

[April]

Jeane wrote: "yes, my saturday morning would be cleaning!"

That sucks, your Saturday morning should consist of breakfast in bed, and some pampering, oh and good books.
Unless of course you like cleaning.

[Jeane]

I don't mind cleaning and I know that everybody else stays in bed long, so it is clean for me to use:-)))

[Leila]

I want to rant about stupid, disrespectful people.

My dad can't walk that much because of a stroke and is thus in a wheelchair. Today when we were out somewhere, we took the elevator. Now unfortunately there was a heavy door to pass through afterwards that didn't have a button to push to open the door automatic.

A man went with us in the elevator and then when I opened the door and try to single-handed get both the wheelchair with my dad through it while holding that heavy door open with my other hand & foot (and you all know how hard it is, especially when there is a bump in the floor and you also need to push up the wheelchair), what does that stupid, ignorant man who has both legs and arms free do? HE PASSES THROUGH while I am struggling with the door and wheelchair, says 'thanks' and LEAVES? I mean come on! Show some respect and help hold the door for just one second.

It all ended up with my dad needing to get out of the wheelchair because I just couldn't manage.

GAH. PEOPLE.

[Elizabeth (Alaska)]

Leila, those are the times I'm reminded of my friend who had an expression: "The more I see of people, the more I like dogs." Fortunately, I have been lucky to meet more people who would have held the door for you. I hope lots of them are in your future as well.

[Becky]

That's terrible Leila! Seriously, I don't understand people at all sometimes. >=(

I second Elizabeth's hope that polite, courteous and helpful people make their way into your path from now on!

[Susanna - Censored by GoodReads]

Having been there myself (stroke and wheelchair), I cannot believe how rude that is!

[Becky]

You know, the more I think about this, the angrier it makes me. I am a healthy, relatively young person, and I would never, ever in a million years dream of not only standing by while someone struggles alone like that, but actually having the AUDACITY to act as if the door is being held open for my use!

That kind of behavior hurts my heart.

Are we really so self-centered that common courtesy has become the exception rather than the rule? Does nobody have empathy anymore?

Hmph. I'm sorry for coming back to rant more about this, but this has been bugging me since I read it. I just don't understand that. I think had I been standing there, not only would I have been helping, but I would have had some choice words for Mr. Jerk of the Universe himself.

[Ed]

Leila wrote: "I want to rant about stupid, disrespectful people.

My dad can't walk that much because of a stroke and is thus in a wheelchair. Today when we were out somewhere, we took the elevator. Now unfortun..."

I have a suggestion for next time: a simple "Could you give me a hand or some help, here?" This might have worked and coupled with a sincere thank you might motivate this person in the future.

I don't believe it's effective to assume that people know that I am struggling. It's more effective to ask for their help. They inevitably give it and are sometimes embarrassed that they didn't see the problem in the first place.

I don't always see other people's needs or problems but I almost always respond to a request for help.

[Esther]

I'm afraid I can't agree with you Ed.

I was brought up to behave a certain way in public and this includes holding doors for everyone.
Even if I'm in a stream of people walking through a door I look behind me quickly to check the person following is paying attention and doesn't get a face full of door.

It is common courtesy and if people would stop rushing around wrapped up in their own world and would pay a little more attention to those around them the world might be more pleasant less accident-filled place.

[Ed]

Esther wrote: "I'm afraid I can't agree with you Ed.

I was brought up to behave a certain way in public and this includes holding doors for everyone.
Even if I'm in a stream of people walking through a door I l..."

It's sad but true that not everyone was brought up the same way. But the truth of the matter is, they weren't. So if I want something, I can't assume the other person has the same standards or upbringing you or I had. If I made those kind of assumptions, I would go through life continuously disappointed in others.

Instead I assume they just haven't had the same training I had and maybe by asking for help, teach them something they had never thought of.

I just don't believe that "Magic Mystery Messages" or assumptions work very well.

Here in Hong Kong, if you waited for people to hold or open the door for you, you would get mighty tired standing there...waiting. It's a cultural thing. Point is people are different and most of them just want the opportunity to do the right thing if someone will help them see what that is instead of assuming they are clueless and rude.

[Leila]

Ed wrote: "I have a suggestion for next time: a simple "Could you give me a hand or some help, here?" This might have worked and coupled with a sincere thank you might motivate this person in the future..."

I was actually close to running after him and ask for help but it all went so quickly. I thought I could handle the door myself and didn't expect him pass by when he was standing behind my dad but by the time it all registered, I just got too angry to go after him and ask. Otherwise, I have no problem with asking for help. Sometimes I ask, sometimes I expect it. I guess it depends on the situation :/