I think I'm having a nervous breakdown

[Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous!]

I am not the most confident person all the time. I am a worrier of the first order and I am really good at working myself up with "what if's" to the point where I stress myself so hard that I get physically ill. I have worried myself sick the week I was to meet Narzain's parents for the first time and since they live out of town, I had plenty of time to worry. His parents are very nice people and I have seen them since and have been fine. I worried myself sleepless over his surgery last year, yes, it went fine,but at the time...

Well, my new one is an ongoing one and has been since he came home last year. The week he came home, his landlord put the property up for sale. Now, Narzian lives in a converted house, 4 flats, and has been here for close to 17 years. The place is not the best of conditions and his landlord (who is a nice guy, just a lousy landlord) did not take care of it as he should have over the years.

Enter a month ago, and Narz gets a call from Mr. X. telling him that the property has been sold. Yippee. The new guy seems o.k. He runs a home remodeling company and I have checked him out along with reading Ohio renters law and so I am prepared for the new lease and looking out for his best interest.

Why doesn't he just move? you may ask. Well,due to several factors, money (lack thereof) and restrictions on his medical care ( we both go to the same low cost/no cost clinic which is only for the suburbs. So, if he goes into Cleveland, he cannot stay so he would lose too much as his job does not offer insurance) not to mention that security deposits are equaling rent, that puts him between a rock and a hard place. Why he cannot live with me? I live with my mom and there is barely room for us at times.

We have been writing down numbers on properties in the area, but well, Narzain has motivation problems and I walk a fine line between encouragement and nagging, so I try to err on the side of not saying too much until it becomes too much to hold back. Then there are tears, guilt (both of us) and whatnot. So, for the last year, and mind you,quite a bit of that was during his recovery, so I think there was a little post surgery depression there too.

What is stressing both of us right now is 1) the rent is going up (figured that one) and 2) the new lease. Up to this point, he has been on an oral month-month basis, with pets allowed. New guy wants 1 year and no pets. (The pets are already here,so we hope to plead for what we have and not get more later.) 3) The lease packet also contains a rental application and credit check form. The new lease kicks in on May 1 along with the first new rent payment. The new guy, whom I spent most of the day with yesterday as he was beginning to fix things, seems decent enough and hopefully reasonable.
What is stressing me, is that he is a little hard to reach at times and in the last month, Narzin has spent a lot of phone tag with this guy.

I have not had this much stress since last year when Narz's company went up for auction right before his surgery. I am crying, losing sleep and weight (maybe not too bad on that one) and just shaking. If this guy does want him to fill out these forms, and Narz does not pass to his standards, I don't know where he' gonna go. All this man has said was about the lease, and Narz is trying to get a hold of him to ask questions.

I am shaking so badly right now, I can barely type. I think that I may even reach a mile today I am so stressed.

Between the wedding stuff (which I got done last week and will get to the bride soon. I hope to have pics soon as well.) I don't know if I'm coming or going, what day it is and what in the bloody world I'm doing on this planet.

F.D.R. said "When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on."

My rope is fraying and I don't know what to do.

[Paul]

{{hugs}} If you need to talk just call my dear. I have no advice, I have not been in that situation before. The best I can offer is that if he has to move into Cleveland Metro has sliding scale fees and there is the Free Clinic. Again GREAT BIG huggies to you

[Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous!]

Thank you sweetie. I have met the new landlord twice this week to let him in to fix things and he seems decent. I just hope he will be reasonable. I know that some of this is left over stress from last year that I have not been able to let go of since the surgery as I had to focus on getting Narzain better and was trying not to stress him any more than I had to.

My own anger and hurt feelings have no place in any of this and I am trying to support him as best as I can. I know what I would have done and that how I would handle a situation is not the same as someone else would. I am a planner (it comes naturally) and I would have approached this much the same as anything else, research, lists, and as much information as I could get.

I know this will have to work out to a point, I'm just not sure of where the point will end up.

[Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous!]

I know many of you will find this to be a "well, Numfar,you should have seen this coming." Everything is fine and the new landlord is very reasonable and the lease will be filed as of today. The pets are fine and more are allowed in future as they are in cages and very tiny.

HUGE BURDEN OF STRESS REMOVED HERE!

Now, I am still working on last years surgery stress leftovers.