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City of Bones
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Calling All Shadowhunters (TMI Roleplay)
Mod
Magnus looked miffed at Lucy's outburst. "I am here, young Shadowhunter," he said slowly, gesturing at her with his pipe, which was still smoking at the tip, "Because your caretaker - London, I believe? - asked me to watch over the Institute in her absence."
"London...isn't here?" Lucy said in disbelief.
"No." Magnus shrugged. "She went off searching for you two."
"She could be in danger!"
"I sent a message telling her you are all perfectly safe - and downright chatty - before I opened the door," Magnus said over her protests. "I suggest you all rest up and shower." He wrinkled his nose. "Shower first."
London WaylandAs Xavier, Carter, Sara and I headed back to the Institute, I couldn't help feeling both relief and disappointment. Relief that we got Heather, Lucy and Ben back safe, and disappointed that we didn't get to go inside and take on Jonathon Morgenstern. Perhaps once the Clave heard everything, they might reconsider storming the place.
Lucy Morgenstern"Gee thanks, its not like we've been kidnapped or anything." Lucy said sarcastically before sighing wearily. "Whatever, Ben if you want to take a shower as well I'll show you one you can use." She stomped past Magnus towards the extra bathrooms without waiting for Ben's answer.
Mod
Walking into my bedroom was like entering a haunted house.
I took out the pins that clung to my hair, throwing them on the vanity table - the silence becoming even more pronounced as the metal edges of the pins clanked softly against the wood.
Walking slowly over to the bathroom just off the bedroom, I flipped on the lights. They blinked erratically before turning on with a brightness that stung my eyes as I headed over to the shower and turned the water on.
Leaving the water to heat up, I drifted back into the bedroom, got out a clean set of clothes - soft pants, a long sleeve sweater and socks -, slipped out of the tattered dress (throwing it in the wastebasket) and kicked the high heels into a corner of the room.
I didn't want to see them. I didn't want to feel the lingering touch of silk against my skin, or smell the sour perfume I'd been doused in. I wanted to stand under that shower and let the water wash everything away. The grief. The sorrow. The longing. The heartache. The memories. Me.
I wanted it all gone.
London Wayland"Where are they?" I asked, when Magnus greeted us at the door.
"Showering" he replied.
I nodded "Thank you for staying here while I was gone. Stay as long as you need old friend" I patted his arm softly.
I wanted to desperately to rush to them, but I knew they would need some time, so I headed towards the kitchen instead. We all took a seat and waited, for any one of them to burst through the door.
"Xavier, shouldn't you head back to your pack now?" I asked him softly. Despite the current situation, I couldn't help but wonder what would happen between us now. Kyle was no traitor and we would be needing to go out and get him back soon. Everything had become a mess.
"Ben is part of the pack, I'm going to stay to make sure he's alright" he said firmly, though I doubted his intentions were purely based around Ben.
Lucy Morgenstern"I cannot believe you!" Sara yelled as she stomped into the kitchen. Lucy followed after, momentarily glad that Ben was nowhere to be seen at the moment. "What I wasn't doing anything wrong." She said defensively, crossing her arms uncomfortably over her chest. Her heart was still pounding and she was sure the blush on her face was making her skin blotchy.
"It wasn't wrong but it certainly wasn't something I wanted to see!" Sara said, looking everywhere but at her. "I said I was sorry! I told you, I was out of towels so I went into your room to borrow one." Sara threw her a dirty look, "why didn't you just grab one form one of the extra rooms?" Lucy shifted guiltily, "your room was closest?"
Sara slammed the cabinet she had been rummaging through shut. London walked in, "hey what's with all the commotion?" Xavier followed, not far behind. Sara made a face and pointed at her, "ask Lucy! We've all been worried sick about her and Heather and what do I find after coming back from trying to rescue them? Her and that werewolf making out in my room in a towel!"
Lucy looked down, mortified, her face going even redder. Both London and Xavier made choked noises and London gave Sara a 'TMI' look. Lucy just wanted to crawl under a rock, she had never felt more humiliated in her life. But she wasn't mad at Sara, she just wished she wouldn't announce to the whole world that she and Ben had kissed in her room.
Lucy slunk out of the kitchen without looking at either London or Xavier and touched her lips, still feeling slightly tingly from earlier.
London Wayland"Sara, don't you think that was a bit unnecessary? We don't know what they have been through" I said, sighing.
"But... but... London, they were kissing. In my room" she whinged.
I shook my head and turned to Xavier "I'm going up to the conservatory. If Heather comes out, tell her to come find me please"
As I left the kitchen, I couldn't help but smile at Lucy and Ben.
Lucy MorgensternLucy kept her head down, looking at her feet so she was startled when as she was turning a corner she bumped into someone. She lost her balance and started to fall when strong hands grabbed her shoulders and steadied her. She looked up and smiled when she saw it was Ben. He smiled back and took his hands off her shoulders to claim one of her hands instead.
"How'd it go with Sara?" He asked nervously and blushed, embarrassed to have been caught in one girl's room while making out with another. Lucy blushed again, "she's just a little miffed right now and besides telling on us to London and Xavier I don't think she'll do anything." Ben's brows raised and he grimaced at the thought of his pack leader hearing about that.
"Oh well, that was totally worth it." Lucy said shyly and Ben tucked a stray curl behind her ear and murmured "definitely" in a husky voice.
Mod
I was sitting on my bed - legs crossed and wet hair lying limp around my face, dripping onto my sweater - when the door to the room clicked open and Sara's face peeked around the worn wood.
"Heather!" she squealed, hurrying over to the bed and flinging her arms around my shoulders, squeezing tightly and letting out a sob of relief. "You're safe; oh, thank the Angel!"
I remained quiet, nodding a little and letting her hug me. Sara seemed to sense something was wrong, because she pulled back and studied my face. "What's wrong?"
A harsh bark of laughter clawed its way out of my throat. "Where do I start?!" I pushed Sara's hands away and got off the bed, padding over to the closet and searching for a towel.
The water dripping from my hair was cold and I'd started to shiver as the weariness settled into my bones. I could feel Sara's worried gaze on my back...but I ignored her. I loved her, I really did, but too much had happened to me to be able to rejoice as of yet.
Using the towel to rub my wet hair ends, I pushed the closet door close and turned back to Sara, who cleared her throat before saying, "Look, Heather, I know it isn't a good time...but London wants to talk to you."
I sighed and rubbed my eyes. "Fine."
"Will it make you feel better if I told you I caught Lucy and Ben making out half-naked?"
That woke me right up. A small smile twitched at the corner of my lips. "Maybe."
"It was so gross!" Sara shuddered and made an 'eww' face. "I would never dream of doing something like that with-"
She broke off, red stealing along her cheekbones.
"Sara?" I raised an eyebrow, feeling a little better. Sara had that effect on me, the Angel bless her. "Tell me. Now."
"I like Carter!" she blurted, slapping a hand to her mouth as if trying to eat the words she'd uttered.
Blades cut through my heart, but I ignored them and the stinging behind my eyes. "Good for you," I told her, swallowing hard. "I'm happy for you, Sara, I am."
"He doesn't know."
"Tell him."
Sara snorted. "That's not gonna work. Guys are like that. How did you tell Jas-"
She broke off, her expression merging into one of absolute horror. I stood still, my hand clutching the towel to my shoulder, hair strands clinging to my fingers. Sara took a breath and gasped out, "Oh, Heather, I didn't mean to mention-"
"It's fine." I set the towel down and ran a hand through my hair, watching the strands stick to my fingers. Clearing my mind. "Really. I better go talk to London, anyway."
I gave her a tiny smile, turned around and headed out of the room.
London WaylandI was sitting out on the balcony, my legs dangling in the open space. I had become all too aware of Xavier's presence recently and I chided myself for being so foolish.
"London" Heather said, sitting down beside me.
For a moment, I couldn't look at her. I didn't know what horrors she had experienced, but my guess was Jason's betrayal stung most. I wasn't sure if I could handle the hurt on her face.
"Hey" I said softly, before turning to look at her. Somehow, she looked older. Wiser. Pained. It was heartbreaking.
We sat together in silence, staring out at the city around us, neither of us voicing our thoughts.
Lucy MorgensternLucy felt a little weird sitting next to Ben while he told Xavier what happened, but he had asked her to be there so she was. She fidgeted until he put a hand on her thigh to calm her down. She took a breath and relaxed against him.
"So you're saying that when you went to meet with the Seelie Queen Jonathan Morgenstern drugged and kidnapped you." Xavier said, more of a statement than a question and Ben nodded, "then he kept me chained in a room. He thought Lucy was weak so he didn't bother chaining her. She snuck out a few times to make sure Heather was ok, then he had some kind of party and Lucy grabbed Heather and something to pick the lock on my shackle. We ran out into a garden and scaled the fence then got a cab and came here."
Xavier frowned, "nobody noticed you escape?" Ben looked at Lucy and she the looked at Xavier. "Well Jason and someone else did. Heather knocked the other man out and told us to go ahead of her while she dealt with Jason, later she said he let her go." Xavier looked shocked, "he let her go, wait he let all three of you go?" Lucy and Ben nodded. Lucy's voice softened, "I think he really does love Heather. But if he was brought up in a way similar to my father it would be very hard for him to betray his father." Both werewolves frowned at her and she bit her lip, realizing she had probably said something she shouldn't have.
She cleared her throat uncomfortably and Ben took the hint, "so we done Xavier?" He asked and squeezed her thigh lightly. Xavier nodded and they left holding hands.
Mod
I broke the silence first, my voice cracking. "London, I'm so s-sorry-" London cut me off, wrapping her arms around me and holding me tight. A sob escaped my lips and I buried my face in her shoulder, my heart breaking all over again.
"There is nothing to be sorry for, Heather - nothing, do you hear me?" London shook my shoulders gently and peered into my face, her eyes big and sad in her face. "Jas-" She broke off, taking a breath. "My brother should have known better. He shouldn't have done what he did. None of this is your fault."
"Then why do I feel so...so..." I struggled to describe the turmoil inside of me.
"You've had your heart broken, Heather," London murmured kindly, tucking a strand of my wet, unruly hair behind my ear. "You have every right to feel what you do. No one expects you to feel nothing."
I sighed, sniffling and swiping at my eyes. "I wish my brother was here," I whispered, my voice odd-sounding, what with my blocked up nose and sob-roughened throat. Crying had made my eyes sore and puffy and I could feel tear tracks drying sticky and cool against my cheeks.
London let out a sigh as well, patting me on my knee. "He is, Heather. It may sound cliche...but he's in here." She placed a hand over my heart. "He is always here."
"He would have teased me mercilessly," I half-laughed, half-sobbed, blinking back tears. "He was never one for moping. He would have said, 'Heather - he isn't worth it. Let's go grab an ice-cream before Dad comes home.'" I shook my head, smiling despite myself. "He was so, so good to me. He..." Tears fell in earnest down my cheeks now. "He shouldn't have died, London! Not Liam. Never Liam...why didn't I-I d-die i-instead?!"
Lucy MorgensternLucy flinched as she heard the tail-end of Heather and London's conversation. Her chest and scars ached like they always did whenever Liam was brought up. She blinked to keep the tears back and swallowed. She had asked Ben to let her go talk with Heather and London alone and she was glad she had, he wasn't here to see her about to cry just from hearing another guy's name.
She thought about what Heather had said about the ice cream and remembered that Meghan had dropped by not too long ago, she might have brought some of her grandmother's homemade ice cream. Lucy walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator and smiled a little when she saw the large container with her name on it in bid chunky letters. She grabbed three spoons and walked back to where Heather and London were.
Lucy walked in without saying anything and plopped down next to Heather. She held up the spoons and the container, "today has been a crappy day so I think we all are in need of some comfort food. I hope everyone likes chocolate-chip cookie dough."
Mod
Heather Lovelace:
I took one of the spoons and gave Lucy a glum look, and said: "But I'll get fat."
Lucy and London burst out laughing. A smile twitched at the corner of my mouth as I ate a spoonful of chocolatey, doughy goodness - waving the cleaned spoon at Lucy. "I am being serious here - I may not have a boyfriend," I continued, feeling a twinge of sadness but shaking it off, "but I still care about my waistline!"
"Sor-ry," Lucy replied, rolling her eyes but I caught her smiling.
"Oh well." I shrugged, giving London a sly look. "I guess I'll eat it anyway...it's not like I've got a steamy-towel experience to look forward to, like some people."
Lucy choked on her spoonful and London giggled along with me.
(I love chocolate-chip cookie dough too!! XD)Lucy Morgenstern
Lucy managed to swallow her ice cream and ruefully thought that it was good to see Heather smiling and laughing again, even if she did have to bring up her and Ben in towels to do so. How had Heather heard about that so quickly? It had happened perhaps an hour ago, tops.
She scooped out another spoonful of ice cream, thinking that it was worth it even if she did gain a few pounds. It was just that good, made from scratch with her favorite type of cookie dough with some chocolate chunks sprinkled in for good measure. It was delicious, each scoop a taste of creamy heaven.
"What's going to happen now?" Lucy asked London, aware that talking about this might send Heather back into her shell but it was important enough that Lucy would risk it to find out. London's mouth twitched, a sign she was irritated. "Well we sent word to the Clave and they said they would send someone to us to hear your story then they would decide upon further actions."
Lucy raised a brow, hear our story? She thought but did not say. Did the Clave think they were making the whole thing up? Maybe they did think that, after all she had pointed the finger at Kyle and now it turned out that he had nothing to do with it. She wasn't the most reliable source right now and though things with Downworlder's were much better than they were a few decades ago many people would discount a werewolf's testimony. That left Heather as the only credible witness. Lucy's stomach tightened with worry, the Clave would be merciless in their questioning and Heather would be asked many difficult questions. Including why the son of the Clave's most feared enemy would let her just walk away.
London Wayland"I wouldn't worry too much. Just rest yourselves for now" I sighed softly "Our next job will be finding Kyle...."
Sure, I wanted to find Kyle and bring him back. I just wasn't sure if I wanted him back with me....
A sharp pang of doubt crept into my mind when I thought of the woman on Xavier's porch. Maybe getting Kyle back would be a good thing after all...
Mod
I sighed and dropped my spoon back into the ice-cream tub, getting to my feet and rubbing my already sore (and probably red-rimmed) eyes. "'Kay," I told London, exhaling deeply. "I'm going to take a short nap, if that's alright?"
"Of course!" London hurried to say, nodding like a bobble-head doll.
She was treating me like a porcelain doll, a glass vase sitting precariously close to the edge of a table, a torn seam; but I couldn't bring myself to start an argument over something so silly. So, she cared about me. She worried. She probably expected me to break down at any moment. But so did I. I was actually surprised that I hadn't collapsed from sheer exhaustion yet.
"I'll get going then," I said into the awkward pause, heading out of the room. "Thanks for the ice-cream," I said to Lucy over my shoulder.
"You're welcome, Heath. Are you sure you're okay?" Her eyebrows were drawn together, a sure sign she was worried.
"Yep." I gave a tight smile.
Nothing could be further from the truth.
Broken lyrics from a song I'd once heard floated through the cracks in my thoughts as I walked back to my room - their haunting melody plunging me into a sleep filled with restless shadows and a light that was always just out of reach.
'And I know it's long gone, and that magic´s not here no more
And it might be okay, but I'm not fine at all...
...Time won't fly it's like I'm paralyzed by it
I'd like to be my old self again
But I'm still trying to find it...
...Cause there we are again when I loved you so
Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well...'
(Lyrics: Taylor Swift's "All Too Well")
London WaylandI found Xavier sitting on the steps out the front of the Institute and joined him.
"I have to head back to the pack soon. I've been away too long" he said softly.
I nodded. It was true, but that didn't mean I wanted him to leave.
"Plus, you'll be looking for Kyle soon..."
I kept silent. I didn't know what to say.
Mod
I woke up later; the dappled soft rays of sunlight filtering through the bedroom window alerting me to the fact that it was morning. Pushing my hair out of my face and blinking blearily at the ceiling, I lay there on my bed...mulling over whether to get up or not to.
Why.
It wasn't a question. It certainly wasn't; I knew why everything had happened. I wasn't a blind idiot, even though I'd been blinded and had certainly had my moments of idiocy. No...it was a plea to whatever God watched over this dark and demon-infested world we lived in. To the Creator that made the angels that in turn made us what we were.
Shadowhunters. How laughable. All we did was hunt shadows...only to come face to face with horrors beyond our comprehension.
Rolling onto my side, I dangled my legs off the bed and sunk them into my awaiting slippers - my head hanging with the weight that burrowed into me, seeping under my skin. My arm tingled where Liam's rune was, visible in the early morning light. Jonathan Morgenstern's protective measures - whether counter-runes or drugs - had worn off overnight, and I felt Liam's power flowing once again through my veins.
Stolen power, a voice inside me hissed.
I grabbed an old jersey out of a drawer and tugged it over my black camisole, staying in my black track pants. No make-up...I stared at my array of powders, lipstick tubes and racks of accessories as if from afar. It seemed so long ago...the days where Sara and I would be busy prettying ourselves up, laughing and teasing, eager to get out of the Institute. Eager to be Shadowhunters.
All my eagerness had abandoned me. I felt empty.
Hair simply braided back, I exited my room and headed down to the Institute kitchen. It was empty. Fishing out a packet of instant mocha sachets, I grabbed a mug - emptying one sachet's contents inside, adding hot water and stirring absentmindedly. Cradling the cup in my hands, I sat down at the long, ancient-looking table...staring at the curls of steam that rose above the cup's brim.
Generations of Shadowhunters had sat at this table. Had any of them ever lost their entire family? How many of them had fallen in love? Been betrayed by someone they cared for? Had any of them been tortured? Maimed? Caged? How many died of broken hearts?
Did any of them get a happy ending?
Sighing heavily, I blew on my mocha and took a tentative sip. Wincing, I set the cup down; the tip of my tongue numb, burnt from getting too close.
Kinda like me.
Mod
Sara came padding into the kitchen; perking up when she spotted my coffee mug. "Mocha?" she asked, sniffing the air above my mug, sighing in contentment.
"Yep." I gave a bob of my head, too tired to do more.
"Nice. I think I'll make myself a Swiss Miss hot chocolate." Sara's long ponytail bobbed behind her as she walked behind the kitchen counter and began rifling in the cupboards for her hot chocolate sachet. "Biscuit?" I lifted my head to see her gesturing to the cookie jar London kept on the top shelf of the pantry.
A smile tugged at my lips. "Cranberry and white chocolate?"
"Do you even have to ask?" Sara teased, grabbing the jar and bringing it over to the table; leaving me only to add hot water into her mug, bringing it over and taking a seat across from me.
Lucy MorgensternLucy sat cross legged on her bed, facing Ben who was sitting in her desk chair across the room. She leaned back against the wall and looked at him, feeling equal parts sad and happy. Ben was stretched out with his long legs crossed at the ankle. "Is it wrong to feel as though this is only the calm before the storm?" She asked earnestly. Though if 'calm' was being kidnapped by Jonathon Morgenstern it was going to turn out to be quite a storm.
"I think everyone feels the same way, have you seen the way everyone is acting? They've all reacted in one of two ways, the first being to pretend nothing has happened and continue with life as though we aren't waiting for war to break out. The second being that they can't stop thinking about what happened and at every little confrontation they hold their breath, waiting to see if this is the straw which breaks the camel's back so to speak." Ben said contemplatively as he stared at the ceiling.
"I guess you're right. It seems like the people around here feel things in the extreme. Denial, or paranoia. We can't seem to find a medium." She said, leaning over and sliding lethargically down the wall. When Lucy was on her side she closed her eyes and sighed, "life really sucks sometimes."
She heard Ben get up and cross the room but didn't open her eyes until his weight made the bed shift. "Maybe sometimes, but not all the time. Not right now." He said, his gaze intense. She smiled and his face softened. He's right, life doesn't seem so bad right now she thought as he leaned down.
Mod
"So..." We'd sat in silence for the past few minutes, munching slowly on crumbly, moist cranberry-chocolate biscuits and taking sips from our respective mugs. Sara's eyes flickered to me, then to her mug, and back again. "I have a question to ask you. But...I don't want you to take it the wrong way, or to get offended - not that I mean to offend, or I want you to get upset-"
I put up a hand, halting her nervous babbling - expression serious. "Sara. You can ask me anything." Swallowing hard past the lump in my throat I added, "You're one of the few friends I have."
Sara took a deep breath, releasing it. "Sorry. I-I'm just curious, is all."
"Shoot." I gave her a small smile, not finding the energy to make it any bigger.
She squared her shoulders and gazed straight at me. "Do you love him?"
I was glad I wasn't drinking when she asked; my hands gripping the mug with enough force to shatter it. Breathing through my nose, I released my grip and laced my fingers together, pressing them to my lips and squeezing my eyes shut.
"Why...why do you want to know?" I murmured, my weariness returning with renewed force. I didn't bother to pretend I didn't know who she was talking about. We both knew that'd be a lie.
"Because." I opened my eyes to see Sara give a heavy shrug. "Because I want to know. I see you walking around listlessly, barely here - a ghost. And I want to know why. Is it because of what happened to you? Did they hurt you?" Or is it something more?"
I dipped a finger into the contents of my mug, not caring that the mocha was still warm enough to send burning sensations through the pad of my finger. Pain helped me focus. "What do I answer first?"
"Whatever you want to," she replied, serious - her eyes reflecting her worry. Her hand shot out and pulled mine out of my mug. "Stop that, Heath." Her tone was gentle. I sighed and leaned back in my chair.
"Yes. They hurt me." I stared hard at the surface of the table. "The prison cell had no WiFi. No TV. And no make-up," I added, trying to make her crack a smile. But she didn't. She looked stunned. I couldn't stand the sympathy in her eyes so I turned to staring at my hands. "It was one of the worst things I've ever experienced. Jonathan Morgenstern is the Devil incarnate."
"And as for your question..." Braced myself. "No." My voice cracked on the word, but I plunged on. "No - I don't love him. Not at all."
There was a silence. Then Sara sighed and leaned over to squeeze my hand before getting to her feet, mug in hand.
"Thanks for telling me that stuff," she said. Then she frowned, biting her lip. "Your last answer..."
I looked up. "Yeah?"
Her eyes bore into mine. "It's a lie." Pain coursed over me. "But whether you know that, or don't, is another question isn't it? Truth is hardest thing to face, Heath. But you'll have to face it sooner or later."
A tear escaped, sliding down my cheek. "I can't."
Lucy MorgensternLucy was still breathing irregularly and grinning like a fool. She could still feel Ben's warmth against her, comforting her and making her feel like a puddle of warm goo.
She heard Sara and Heather talking in the kitchen and forced her happiness down, it wasn't fair that she was able to be with Ben and be so happy when Heather was hurting so bad. That wasn't going to stop her from seeing Ben but she wasn't going to flaunt it, especially not in front of Heather.
Lucy steeled herself and walked into the kitchen in time to see Heather swiping angrily at her face. "You're talking about Jason." Lucy stated, looking at them both for conformation. Sara nodded and Lucy mock frowned then put her hands on her hips, "do I need to break out the ice cream again?" Heather didn't laugh as Lucy had intended, instead her shoulders slumped.
Heather put her head in her hands and said in a cracked voice, "tell me it gets better." Lucy shook her head and sighed, knowing what she was talking about. "What do you want me to say Heath? That yes it gets better, that eventually there comes a day when you don't think about them and your heart doesn't feel like a part has been ripped away? That you can forget about them and move on? Because if I said that I would be lying. It doesn't get better, not a day goes by that I don't think about him, not day goes by which doesn't make my heart ache at the slightest mention of him." Lucy put her hand on Heather's back and rubbed her hand up and down comfortingly.
"All I can tell you is that it gets more bearable, one day you will be able to move on if that's what you want. One day you will be able to look at someone and see them for who they are, not someone they aren't and can never be."
Mod
One of my favourite mundane authors, Scott Westerfield, once stated, "The human heart is a strange vessel. Love and hatred can exist side by side.”
The lovely thing about words is that they look so neat, lovely and harmless lying on paper. Staring at you from screens. Scrawled onto the back of your hand. But add reality to the equation, and words have the power to unravel you from within, cracking the jar you've shoved your thoughts and feelings into in the hopes of ridding your mind - your heart - of them. A word, a phrase, a name...they were like seraph blades held over burning hearths and then pressed against cold flesh.
Scott Westerfield's words echoed through my head as I stood in the middle of the training room...staring around at the empty expanse, taking in the smell of leather and metal. Thoughts of Jason sliced my carefully erected walls to shreds. How is it possible to want to feel his lips on mine and at the same time plunge a knife into his chest?
A sharp, sad laugh escaped my numb lips. It was so, so messed up. But it was the brutal, horrible, wicked truth.
Mod
"Am I interrupting something?"
I whirled around, pulled out of the whirlpool of my thoughts by Magnus' drawl. He leaned against the door to the training room, hands shoved into the pockets of his leather jacket - cat eyes glowing with amusement and something else that almost looked like sympathy.
"Nope." I shrugged off my grief and gave a light grimace. "Feel free to join the pity party."
Magnus snorted and stood up, walking into the room. "Ah, pity parties. Ever so much fun. I have attended many over the years and have even hosted a few." His gaze swept over the racks of weaponry. "Charming room. Shadowhunters love their toys."
My attention caught on the sword collection lining the far left wall. Jas- he had adored the collection the Shadowhunters had collected over the years. Yeah, he'd liked guns, knives..."But swords are Galahad-material," he'd laughed once, grinning wickedly. "Wouldn't I make a pretty Galahad, Heath?"
Blinking, I suppressed the bitter memories. "Yeah. They sure do." I raised an eyebrow as Magnus grabbed a knife, turning it in his hands, studying the blade before executing a fancy whirl. "You fight?"
"You sound surprised, Miss Lovelace." Magnus grinned. "I have a lot of hidden talents."
"I'm sure." I smiled, feeling my mood lighten.
"For instance..." Magnus trailed off, eyes flickering from the blade to me. "I have the ability to track someone down given an object that belongs to them."
"Tracking Spells." I pursed my lips. "That's nothing new."
Magnus smirked. "I also have the ability to predict the future."
I sighed heavily, running a hand through my hair. "By the Angel. Magnus; you cannot predict the future. You're being silly."
His eyes narrowed. "Maybe. Maybe not. Let's just say I have an uncanny ability to know what will happen and how Fate will play itself out. I can tell you, for example, that your little escape scenario will not be the last you come face to face with the young Morgenstern boy. Jared was it? John? Jeremiah?"
Gritting my teeth, I seethed quietly. Glaring at the warlock, I said, "I haven't got time for games, Magnus."
"Oh, neither do I!" he exclaimed, setting the knife back with the others and rubbing his hands together, sparks flying from his fingertips. "I assure you, Miss Lovelace; I speak the truth. Call it my charm. Call it Fate. Call it foresight. Even call it experience. But my words remain true."
Mod
'I remember years ago
Someone told me I should take
Caution when it comes to love
I did
And you were strong and I was not
My illusion, my mistake
I was careless, I forgot
I did
And now when all is done
There is nothing to say
You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won
You can go ahead tell them
Tell them all I know now
Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the sky line
All we had is gone now
Tell them I was happy
And my heart is broken
All my scars are open
Tell them what I hoped would be
Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible.'
James Arthur's emotional rendition of Impossible filled the the room as I lay on my bed, twirling a seraph blade between my fingers. Watching the blade catch the light. Letting the motions lull me into a dream-like trance, distancing me from the reality threatening to cave in around me.
Out of nowhere - maybe it was when the words, 'Falling out of love is hard/Falling for betrayal is worse/Broken trust and broken hearts' reached my ears - an idea began forming in my head, wisps of thoughts and frozen droplet memories weaving a web, a tapestry that began to take shape in my mind's eye.
The memory that stood out the most was Liam - Liam's eyes, beseeching and broken, begging me to understand something silent, something unspoken.
"She gave me this rune. She made it herself."
"Who is 'she'?" I'd asked, eyeing the sketch of the rune as if it were a a curiosity - an insect in a bell jar.
"I...I can't tell you, Feather."
Maybe Lucy'd been right. Clary Morgenstern. Why had she created this rune? How? And if she had, what did it do and what did Jonathan want with it?
There was only one way to get answers to those questions.
I would have to find her and ask for myself.
Lucy MorgensternLucy was staring at Heather with a look that clearly said she had lost her mind. "You want to talk to Clary Morgenstern, my dead mother?" She asked incredulously. Heather gave me an indecipherable look, "but she's not really dead is she? I mean the Clave never found her body."
Lucy's lips pinched shut, "she's dead Heather let it go. Why would you even want to talk to her?" She asked, redirecting the conversation away from the whereabouts of her mother's body.
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"Because, Lucy," I said, trying to rein in my temper, "Your mother may have created something that Jonathan Morgenstern wants badly enough to kill, plot and scheme for. That Liam gave his life for. That is branded into my skin. I need to know what this rune is!"
"What," Lucy replied calmly, "Makes you think my mother was the one to create it?"
"Your mother - and you said it yourself - is one of the few Shadowhunters in history to be able to simple create runes out of nowhere. It's a gift not many have. And my brother mentioned a 'she'."
"It's farfetched, Heath."
"But it's the only lead we have," I said. "I need this. I need to find her and get answers."
"She's dead." Lucy laid a hand on my shoulder, giving me a gentle shake. "I...I know what it's like to cling to the smallest scrap of hope, or purpose, and push yourself until you break. But, Heather, she's gone. The Shadowhunters have searched. My step dad searched for five years, but she and my father disappeared off the face of the earth. They...they left me. It's unheard of. My parents are gone. They have to be dead. There is no other explanation."
I blew out a breath. "Do...do you have anything of theirs - hers?"
Lucy frowned. "I don't know. Maybe. I'd have to search through my things. Why?"
"Magnus can do a Tracking Spell."
"Heather, don't you think he already has?" Lucy crossed her arms over her chest. "He was their friend. He probably did a Tracking Spell the minute he found out. But I told you, no one-"
I held up a hand, my eyes widening. "Of course. How could I have been so blind?"
"What are you talking about?"
"He knows." I gave a shocked laugh. "Magnus knows where they are, Lucy. But he knew giving their whereabouts was too dangerous!"
"That's just speculation."
"He befriended me as soon as I came to New York," I continued. "He mentioned the Tracking Spell to me. He must know I have the rune. She could have told him. By the Angel, Lucy - Magnus may have the answers we're looking for."
Lucy MorgensternLucy clenched her jaw and her eyes narrowed, "let it go Heather. My parents are dead." She said coldly. There was a reason they had disappeared, and while Lucy may not know what that reason was she knew they weren't dead. She'd always known, it'd been easier though for others to think she thought they were dead though. It kept people from asking too many questions.
Lucy clenched her fists hard, ignoring the pinpricks of pain her fingernails were creating in her palms. She could still remember her father and mother leaving. Her father had had something wrapped in cloth under one arm. Her mother had picked her up and carried her to the door of their home.
She remembered her father tenderly putting his hand to her face and saying, "Luce we're going to have to go away for awhile. We love you very much but you can't come with us." She remembered starting to cry and asking them not to go. She remembered leaning into her mother and begging them not to go, knowing what happened when parents said things like this from what her grandmother had told her.
Her mother had put her down and took out her stele and told Lucy to turn around. She had done so, still sniffling and trying not to wail. She had gasped when she felt something hot press against her skin just at the base of her neck and forgot her tears. When the hotness disappeared her mother had hugged her tightly and picked her up again. Her mother had given her father a pinched look and nodded. He had come up behind her and undone the necklace she always had on. He had given it to Lucy and her mother said "There as long as that rune is there and you have mommy's necklace you'll know we're still alive ok honey?"
Lucy remembered crying, begging them not to go but they had just looked at each other with sad pained looks and hugged her fiercely before exiting the house and closing the door.
Lucy unclenched her fists and she moved her hand to stroke the tiny rune at the base of her neck. Yes they're still alive, but what I want to know is why they left. She thought, her heart laced with pain at the memory of her parents.
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I sucked in a breath; biting the inside of my cheek hard enough to draw blood, the coppery taste filling my mouth.
"Fine." The word was succinct, cracked on the edges and filled with suppressed emotion. I turned my head away, avoiding eye contact. "Fine. I'll...let it go. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some washing to fold that I should be getting to."
I hurried away, trying to rein in the unexplainable anger that filled me, rushing through my veins like liquid fire. It chased the sorrow, nipping at its heels; taunting me, reminding me that all I had left was a broken heart, shattered trust, no family and questions whose question marks would never be erased. As if agitated by my fruitless attempt at seeking the truth, my rune itched and I was painfully aware of it - it carried a weight to it, pressing into my skin and branding me. Owning me.
I need an outlet. Normally I would shrug on my jacket, slip on a pair of devilish heels and hit the town - searching out demons and killing them to calm the inferno inside of me. But it hit too close to home; my experience at the hands of Jonathan Morgenstern still raw in my mind. I needed something to unleash this anger on - this never ending anger, hurt, resentment and frustration.
Stalking down the corridor, I paused outside my bedroom - hand on the doorknob. Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm myself. It's not Lucy's fault. Oh, I knew it wasn't. But it didn't make it any easier to stop resenting her for her inability to understand how much I needed to find Clary. To find answers. Sighing, I opened the door and stepped inside, closing it behind me.
The room was dark, the curtains closed - though I didn't remember closing them. Then again, I'd been so out of it lately, I probably wouldn't remember my name by the end of the week without help. Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out my witchlight...green light streaming through the gaps in my fingers and illuminating the room.
And the figure of Jason Morgenstern standing before me.
Gasping, heart beating faster than a fleeing hare, I backed up; scrambling for the door - but he was quicker, slipping an arm around my waist and pulling me back against him. "Heather, wait-" he began. Whirling, I slammed my elbow into his midsection, cutting off his words. He sucked in a painful breath and I took the chance to head for the door again. But no sooner did my fingers brush the door than he was behind me, arms placed on either side of me, caging me in.
"Heather." His voice was low, barely a whisper, but firm. "I'm not here to hurt you. Just...hear me out." He leaned in, eyes fastened on mine. My chest rose and fell quickly, my voice caught somewhere in my throat. His lips brushed my ear as he murmured, "Please, Heather."
Letting out a shallow breath, I struggled to find my voice - my eyes stinging with unshed tears, my heart trying to drag itself out of my chest to melt into him. I was drawn to him. He was a wicked, beautiful magnet and I didn't have the strength to resist him.
"One. Minute," I managed, turning my face slightly away so I didn't lose myself in his eyes. Or give myself away. "Then I'm killing you. Got it?"
"Crystal clear."
We stared at each other for a long moment before I reached behind me and turned the lock on the door with a 'click'. A part of me shouted that I was making a huge mistake. How had he gotten in here? Why should I trust him? He'd broken my heart. He's betrayed us all.
But I needed to do this. I needed to face him.
Booknut wrote: "Heather LovelaceHeather needed to get her head around a few key issues:
1.) How to calm down an irate London who had returned to a nearly empty Institute - it's only occupants being the guy Heat..."
I just want to keep reading you are an amazing writer
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Booknut wrote: "(@Hallie - awwwww thanks!! :))"Seriously you could totally make this a book I am so excited for your next post
((She's right, Booknut. You could seriously get some of this published!))
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((That's really cool... :) ))
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I tapped my unsheathed seraph-blade against my thigh. Each tap was another venom-laced thought that I kept my lips from spilling; not willing to give Jason the satisfaction of hearing just how cut up over his betrayal I really was.
Miserable jerk. Tap. Tap. Leaning against the wall like he hasn't a care in the world. Tap. Tap. Tap. Why in the name of the Angel is he so darn hot? Tap. I could hate him so much more easily if he looked like a troll. Tap. Tap.
"Your minute's nearly up," I muttered. Jason hadn't done anything but stare intently at me with those traitorous green eyes since he'd magically appeared in my bedroom. I kinda wanted him to do something; leap at me, attack me, start ranting.
Anything that would give me an excuse to put my seraph-blade to good use.
Jason's eyes narrowed at my remark. "I'm thinking."
"Think faster," I replied, my expression hardening. "I haven't got all day." Tap. Tap.
He raised an eyebrow at me, but said nothing. He didn't need to.
"I..." Jason frowned, his gaze shifting to my seraph-blade. "Could you stop that?"
"Why?" I began to tap out Cowboy Casanova. "Does it annoy you?"
He nodded. "Faintly, yes."
I smirked. "Good."
"Well, well - aren't we mature?"
I ignored his comment and shot him a glare - halting my tapping to flip the blade, catching it and pointing it at him. "Start talking or you'll end up the first ever human sushi dish."
Lucy MorgensternAs soon as Heather had left Lucy went in search of the ring. It was her mother's family ring, engraved with the falling star that was the Morgenstern's crest. She finally found it in the bottom of her bag, tucked away neatly into a secret pocket. She pulled it out and held it up, watching the ring catch light from the window as it dangled on its chain.
Lucy's eyes pricked but she held back the tears, now wasn't the time to start crying. She dropped the ring and its chain into her other hand, the chain coiling around the metal band. She clenched her fist and stood. Heath was right, it was time to find her parents. They were out of their league and the Clave wouldn't be of any help. It was time for Clary and Jace to come back, whatever their reasons were for leaving her behind they were needed now.
Lucy opened the door to her room and left, ignoring the hairs which stood on the back of her neck. Something told her she wouldn't be back for a long time.
It didn't take long for Lucy to find Magnus, though why he was still hanging around was a mystery. She opened her mouth as his glittering cat eyes flicked to her. "You want me to find them." He said. It wasn't a question. She shut her mouth and nodded. He studied her and smoked his pipe. Before answering he exhaled, the smoke swirling around aimlessly instead of creating images as it had before. "What makes you think they're even alive? The Clave had me-" "Because my mom gave me a way to know whether or not their dead when they left." She said quickly and quietly as if afraid of being overheard.
"Why are you waiting until now?" Magnus asked, and though his tone implied boredom he was watching Lucy too intently and was clearly anything but. "They left for a reason." She said simply. In truth, she had been scared that if she had tried to find her parents she would succeed only to find she was the reason they had left in the first place. "What makes you think I can find them?" He asked, his demeanor still the same. Her lips curled and she raised a brow, "you can't? And here I thought I was speaking with the High Warlock of Brooklyn." He didn't take the bait, instead regarded her with pursed lips. "Final question. What happens when you do find them?"
Lucy opened and closed her mouth like a fish, gasping as its pulled from the water. She had no answer for Magnus' final question, she couldn't think of some witty comeback or snarky retort. Because she had no answer. Lucy didn't know what she would do if and when she came face to face with the parents that had abandoned her long ago.
Lucy swallowed and blinked back tears again. "Just help me find them. We need them, they're the only ones who can stop Sebastian." Magnus looked at her, scrutinized her with his strange gold and green eyes. He finally sighed, "very well. Give me the ring and I'll see what I can do."
Lucy MorgensternLucy was going out of her mind, it had been hours since she had dropped off her family ring and Magnus had yet to tell her where her parents were. At first she had been able to keep her mind off it by packing, shoving supplies into pack and making sure she had ample provisions. Why she was packing she had no clue. She had no real plans once she, well if she got her parents' location.
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Several minutes later, my seraph-blade was pressed against the skin of Jason's neck - his Adam's apple bobbing nervously in his throat. One flick of my wrist, one shift of my fingers on the hilt, and I could cut his throat where he stood.
"Are you insane?!" I hissed, pressing the flat of the blade harder against his neck. "What in the name of the Angel could convince you to propose such a thing?!"
"Heather-"
"Don't Heather me!" I spat, glaring at him - our faces inches apart. He made no move to fight, or to rid himself of the blade I held to him. It was all too suspicious.
I knew he could throw me off if he wanted to. Granted, with Liam's rune, I could probably beat him if I gave it my all. But this Jason before me was...submissive. Passive. "You're up to something," I murmured, breathing out heavily, trying to remain calm. He made me so angry, my blood boiling in my veins like liquid fire. "And I don't give two shits about your ideas, Jason Morgenstern."
He flinched at my emphasis on his surname, eyes filling with something that looked awfully like hurt. Which made me angrier. He had no right to be hurt! He was the traitor - he was the heartbreaker. Not me.
"I'm telling you, Heath," he replied. I could feel his words along the edge of my blade, from where it lay against his neck - the vibrations making me far too aware of him. "I...I can't ask you to trust me." I snorted. "But I need you to give the idea a chance. It's the only way you can stop what my father is planning."
"Which is what, Jason?" I demanded.
"You know I can't tell you." He gave a light grimace, his hand inching towards the hem of his shirt. Eyes wide, startled, I watched as he lifted the hem, revealing an amazing physique...as well as a gleaming rune. "Even if I wanted to."
"Do you?" I asked reluctantly; but I needed to know. I needed to straighten out where we stood. "If you could, Jason, would you tell me? Or would you play lapdog to Daddy-dearest?"
His jaw tightened. "Nothing is straightforward, Heath."
Disappointment made the backs of my eyes burn. Letting my hand fall to my side, I sheathed my blade. "With you, Jason? It never is." I stepped back and gave a hollow sigh. "Well. Your minute is up. Thanks for dropping by. Have fun taking over the world with Darth Vader the Second."
Jason pushed himself off the wall. "Heather, you need to consider what I told you."
"All I know, Jason," I said, voice cold, "is that you have outstayed your welcome. And that every word that seems to come out of your mouth is a lie. So yes, I will consider what you've said. And then promptly disregard it as crap."
Jason stopped before me; his fists clenched at his sides, brows furrowed as his gaze studied me. I glared back, defiant. Then, swift as lightening, he ducked his head and pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth...not quite my cheek, but not quite my lips either. This close I could smell the scent of leather that clung to him, and feel the the warmth coming off him.
Like a fire. Except I have no wish to be burnt.
Tears spilled onto my cheeks and I bit the inside of my cheek, shoving him roughly, breaking the kiss. I turned away, averting my eyes. "Leave." My voice was choked with tears. Swiping my eyes, I stared at the floor...listening to the slow rhythm of footsteps, the creak of the window and the click of it being shut behind him.
My heart breaking a second time.
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Lucy MorgensternLucy stared at the map in her hands. It was all Magnus had given her when he finally left the Institute. He hadn't said anything, just handed her the ring and the map before thanking London for the hospitality.
Lucy grabbed her pack and a stele, bringing to the center of her mind the rune to open portals. She swallowed, "looks like I'm going to Italy."
London Wayland*Crying about her Kyle/Xavier situation somewhere... I think*
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I headed out of my rooms - after slapping on some concealer to cover the circles under my eyes, and to hide the tell-tale puffiness. The halls were silent. Memories sprang to mind of days when the Institute had been filled with the sound of chatter, even laughter. The clang of blade against blade would sing from the training room; it had been like living in the middle of a hive.
Now, it was like living in an abandoned graveyard.
I found London in the kitchen, pouring herself a mug of coffee. It seemed like, these days, caffeine was the only thing keeping us running. Hope had deserted us, along with the fuel, the fire, to keep fighting.
"Hey." I slid onto the barstool, watching as she dumped in a tablespoon of sugar. "Have...have you seen Lucy?"
London sighed and stirred her coffee, glancing up at me. "Let me think. Hmm. She was here about five minutes ago, to see Magnus Bane off. After that she mumbled something about the courtyard, and took off with some kind of map-"
Ice settled into the pit of my stomach. "A map? Are you sure?"
London nodded, taking a slow sip of her drink. "A ring and a map. Maybe she's studying up on artefacts?" She shrugged heavily. "It's not like we have much else to do..."
I watched as London rubbed at her eyes, and I felt a pang of sorrow for her - the woman who had to run the New York Institute, as well as deal with the betrayal of her half-brother, along with our worsening situation. And her own troubles to boot.
"Don't worry about it," I said, giving her a tight smile and getting up. "I'll just head over to the courtyard and keep her company. Maybe take her out to lunch."
"Sounds lovely." London took another swig of her coffee. "If you need me, give me a call; I'm going to head over to Woolsey Scott's."
"The werewolf? The founder of Preator Lupus?"
"The very same."
Lucy MorgensternLucy was in her room, sitting with her legs crossed on top of her bed with her laptop on her lap. She was looking at pictures of Italy so she could figure out where she wanted to portal to. After finally deciding on a cemetery which would be deserted when she got there. She shut her laptop and pulled out her stele, feeling her spine tingle at the thought of finally seeing her parents.
Just as she lifted her stele a knock came at her door and she jumped. "Luce?" Came a deep voice and she relaxed. It was only Ben. "Come on in." She said, chucking her pack to the floor behind her hamper and tucking her stele away.
The door creaked open and Ben poked his head in and Lucy tried to ignore the way her heart twisted guiltily when his face brightened when he saw her. She was leaving, she was putting herself in danger and telling him what she was doing hadn't even crossed her mind. She was trying to keep him safe, what was the saying? Ignorance is bliss? She wanted him safe, and whatever it was that her parents had run from all those years ago was anything but.
Lucy got off the bed and walked to the door, forcing a smile as she opened the door so he could walk in. "Hey, what's up?" She asked and backed up until her calves bumped against the bed. Ben walked into her room and looked around, a faint blush forming in his cheeks. "Xavier said I could go and I wanted to see you." It was Lucy's turn to blush and she smiled, though she felt even more guilty.
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Well. Lucy definitely wasn't in the courtyard.
I blew out an exasperated breath and rubbed at my eyes, feeling a migraine coming on. I might need an iratz later, the way my day was going.
Why couldn't my life ever be simple? I felt an irrational surge of longing for Liam. Irrational, because as much as the rune he'd given me burned, and as clear as the image of his face was when I closed my eyes, the truth was...Liam was dead.
And nothing would change that. But I'd be damned if I'd let Lucy go the same way - or let her go off gallivanting around the globe without me.
My thoughts turned to the idea Jason had conceived. The one he'd urged me to consider.
"By the Angel, I am so tired of this!" I cried, shoving him away from me. "Do you know what you're suggesting, dumbass? Do you?!"
"It's the only way," Jason pleaded. "Heather-"
"No."
"Heather! Please, listen to me."
"You lost that privilege the minute you became your father's son," I spat, biting down hard on my lip. No; I would not cry. Not in front of him. "There is no way I will risk everything simply because you, of all people, says to do so!"
He shook his head adamantly. "No. God, Heather; I have failed you. I know I have. But believe me when I say I have never lied to you."
"You betrayed us-"
"But I never lied!" he argued. "Not once. I just never told you who my real father was. I didn't tell you what he wanted of you, because I couldn't! I physically cannot!"
"You betrayed me in the worse way possible, Jason."
"I know." He sucked in a breath, and glanced away. "And I will live with that for the rest of my life. Every, single day. But I have not, and will not, lie to you, Heather. My father wants to study the rune and its effects..."
I brought my fingers to my temples, closing my eyes. "Why?"
"Heather..." His sad look said it all. He couldn't say.
"Argh." I gritted my teeth. "You want me to give myself up to your father when I know nothing? Are you insane?"
"He'll harm everyone you care about," Jason told me quietly, his tone hollow. "He won't stop until he has the rune, Heath. But this time, it will be on your own terms. This time you will have the upper hand."
"And what do I do when I'm at Hotel Morgenstern, Jason? Kick my feet up and sip piña coladas?!"
"No." Jason's expression hardened. "You find a way to get to my father. You're not...inhibited. By runes, or other, to obey him. And when you get close to him - you can kill him."
There was a long silence.
"How do I know he isn't controlling you now? How do I know this is you asking me, not him? How do I know this isn't a trap?" I whispered - confused, heartbroken, angry and so, so sick of this entire situation. A curse on Jonathan Morgenstern's head for the trouble he brought into my life.
Jason shook his head sadly. "You don't."
"You're crazy!" I exclaimed. My temper flaring, I brought my seraph blade to his neck, slamming him against the wall. "I...I can't believe you would even suggest this! Are you insane?!"
I stared at the stone paving of the courtyard. Maybe Jason was insane. But who, in this cruel, twisted world wasn't? Maybe I was insane for letting an opportunity like this one pass. Maybe I was insane for wondering what it would be like to sink a blade into Jonathan Morgenstern's cold, evil heart. Maybe I was insane for wishing I had accepted Jason's plan.
Maybe I was insane. Maybe he was insane. But that's what had drawn us to one another - that addictive, breathtaking insanity that sprang to life when we were together. The way his words sounded like they'd been made for me to hear them; that they'd been waiting on his lips until I'd met him.
But our insanity not only drew us together; it tangled us so much that we couldn't help but clash, crash and burn.
Lucy MorgensternLucy looked up at Ben's sleeping face. He hadn't slept well since they had escaped from her uncle and she knew he was under a lot of stress. He made a wolf-like whimper and his arms tightened around her.
For the past couple of hours they had talked... Among other things before he had fallen asleep with his arms wrapped around her. She traced the planes of his face and he settled. Carefully so as not to disturb Ben, Lucy extricated herself and reached into her bedside desk drawer to withdraw a sketchpad and charcoal pencil.
She looked at Ben as she sketched. People told her drawing was something she got from her mother, and she wondered if her mom saw things the was she did. Lucy loved to draw on occasion, forgetting everything else and just focusing on the hard and soft edges of reality. It wasn't something she did or thought of often but it was so nice to lose herself in it.
Lucy finished her sketch just as Ben started to snore softly. She smiled as she looked at him, her face softening as she started writing under the drawing. Ben deserved to know something, if not everything. She ripped the page from her book and folded the paper into a small square. She folded it into Ben's hand and kissed his temple.
After making sure he was still sleeping Lucy grabbed her pack and her stele, pulling to mind the Italian cemetery. She carved the portal rune into the air and walked through.
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"Whoa, whoa." I held up a hand, trying to process everything. "Slow down and start again."
Ben let out a ragged breath, running his fingers through his tousled hair. "Okay. I fell asleep; well, Lucy and I were talking...and then we kinda weren't-"
"TMI, Ben," I cut in, wrinkling my nose. "But continue."
"-so I fell asleep and when I woke up I found this." Ben shoved a piece of paper at me. I took it from him and unfolded it.
There was a sketch of Ben's face - realistic from the lines of his jaw, to the curve of his eyelashes. It had clearly been done as he'd slept, the knuckles of one hand visible as they rested just beneath his cheek. Underneath the sketch was a scribbled message:
Ben,
Please don't hate me for what I am about to do. I also ask you to forgive me for not saying a proper goodbye, but you looked so peaceful. I didn't want to wake you. And hopefully goodbyes won't be necessary and I will be back as soon as I can.
I'm going to find my parents. I need to do this. For me. For all of us. I'm doing this alone, because it's something that only I can do, Ben. Trust me when I tell you that.
I love you, Ben. More than you know; more than I've said. And it is your love that gives me the strength to face whatever is ahead. As Wordsworth once said: “There is a comfort in the strength of love; 'Twill make a thing endurable, which else would overset the brain, or break the heart.”
Give my love to Heather; tell her I will make this right.
Mizpah,
Lucy
London Wayland (is there a particular reason I'm off to Woolsey's?)The night breeze was cold and I wrapped my arms around my body, trying to keep in all the warmth. Woolsey's wasn't too far, but I could already feel the chill in my bones. Woolsey and I were friends, once, when I hung around with Xavier and his pack. It feels like an awfully long time ago now.
I wonder how Woolsey is going to react to me appearing on his doorstep.
"That's just cruel and you know it." Lucy said, her eyes narrowed. Magnus said nothing, just blew smoke into the air. "Now I will ask you again and you will answer. What. Are. You. Doing. Here?"