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Did I Fall Off the Edge of the Globe?
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I do the same thing, and sadly my excuses are never as good as yours. In my case I just procrasinate until the end of time and then realise I'm wayyy behind things!
I know my beta reader must get annoy with me as I send her chapters at a time and it takes me for ever to send new ones sometimes, although this is in part to the fact that I am a perfectionist and try to clean it up the absolute best that I can before sending it over.
Anyway, welcome back! I'm sure everyone is glad to hear your back!

When she left the first week of January, I was given a last-minute assignment for the college at which I teach. So, I spent the remainder of that week and all of the next week preparing for the class that was assigned to me on the spur of the moment. At the end of that chaos, I spoke the words, "Next week, things should be back to normal, and I can get back to work."
Would you believe that my truck burned to the ground that weekend? The next two weeks involved car shopping, dealing with insurance, shuffling priorities to make everything work out. And now, here it is the beginning of February, and I'm finally getting back to work.
I know the people here on Goodreads think I've fallen off the edge of the globe, but the truth is that my life has been chaotic for the past couple of months. I'm looking forward to being on here regularly again, so Lord willing, things will calm down.
Sorry for the novel! I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm still here.