Memoir Authors discussion
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Chris Bullock
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To name or not to name?
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I've changed most of the names in my upcoming memoir simply because it deals with my husband's death by medical negligence. It just wasn't worth potentially opening up a can of worms to leave the names intact, even though the story is true. I agree with the person who said the names don't really effect the reader's experience in this case.
Thanks for sharing this, Michele. I can understand in your case how it might be wise to change names. I have a lot of celebrity in my story, (early days of rock 'n' roll), so for the sake of the reader's experience those names need to stay true, but I have changed the names of several very bad people, (wish I didn't have to), just to avoid problems. Good luck with getting your story out.
Hello All, I'm haunted with this issue, before I even need to be since I am barely through my first draft, but since I am procrastinating I thought I'd share.
It's been over a year since this thread has been active but I thought you might still be interested in this link. I enjoyed this episode greatly.
https://itunes.apple.com/ca/podcast/l...
When I finally write mine, I'm going to have a sentence on the back of the title page that says "some names were changed to protect the guilty, as well as the city, since it may be the guiltiest of all"). I'll just call it "t------, Ohio."I doubt anyone who's not one of the guilty will even look for that sentence.
Virginia wrote: "Thanks for sharing this, Michele. I can understand in your case how it might be wise to change names. I have a lot of celebrity in my story, (early days of rock 'n' roll), so for the sake of the re..."Sensible decision. Sounds as if you need those celebrity names for the book to make sense and be relevant. I have met some very well known national and international people but in all cases have changed the names and descriptions. I felt, still do feel, it is appropriate to protect others whether they be guilty of cruelty or just innocent bystanders. It really has not made any difference to the reader as the events stand on their own without the need for actual names.
This is exactly what I have been worried about. I've written a rough draft without mentioning any names, but it just doesn't sound right without names. I keep hearing that you need permission to use real names. Some people's names I don't remember, but most I do. A girl I hated in school and a former boss I'm especially worried about. I'm afraid to even mention my cousins's names, and same with my psychiatrist's name. People I know have suggested using fake names, but I'm worried some of the people might get guess I mean them. Can you use fake names in a memoir?
Jamie wrote: "This is exactly what I have been worried about. I've written a rough draft without mentioning any names, but it just doesn't sound right without names. I keep hearing that you need permission to us..."I have. - However, I entered a disclaimer in the preface clearly explaining names of both people and locations had either been omitted or changed AND made sure readers understood why I had done this. I have also taken care to limit descriptions so as to avoid someone being clearly identified. Takes a bit of working round but it appears to have worked. Of course, I have also used a nom de plume and have NOT posted any photographs of myself or any relative: I was quite well known by many at the time and could be easily identified. Admittedly, this does impact upon how I am able to publicise and market my books but I would rather that than see others suffer, even if in some ways they deserve to.
Just one further point: You mention gaining people's permission. As you will appreciate from what I have said, this has not been an issue for me. But I have read a couple of comments by authors who did this but subsequently, after publication, that person took umbrage and threatened litigation.
I've been looking at the intros to several books labeled memoirs and have seen a disclaimer saying that some names and details have been changed to protect individuals' privacy and that of their families.
Jamie wrote: "I've been looking at the intros to several books labeled memoirs and have seen a disclaimer saying that some names and details have been changed to protect individuals' privacy and that of their fa..."I think that is only fair and is also responsible writing. This is particularly true in respect of relatives, descendants and friends. I do not see why they should be made to pay for others behaviour or be embarrassed by it?
T.R. wrote: "Jamie wrote: "I've been looking at the intros to several books labeled memoirs and have seen a disclaimer saying that some names and details have been changed to protect individuals' privacy and th..."I have been typing my rough draft and have inserted fake names. In some cases I left the people unnamed since I did not remember their real names.
Jamie wrote: "T.R. wrote: "Jamie wrote: "I've been looking at the intros to several books labeled memoirs and have seen a disclaimer saying that some names and details have been changed to protect individuals' p..."I have done the same. It does not appear to matter or spoil the read.
Jamie wrote: "T.R. wrote: "Jamie wrote: "I've been looking at the intros to several books labeled memoirs and have seen a disclaimer saying that some names and details have been changed to protect individuals' p..."I've struggled with similar issues, Jamie, and wrote a blog about it. You can read it here: http://lindakovicskow.com/2016/04/mem....
I used a blended approach and asked people who were listed in the book. Most of my 11 siblings got new names if there was any doubt, and then I omitted my former husband's last name. He is a main character and a lover of lawsuits. I could call him Fido and he'd likely sue me. Since much of our story was dragged in the newspapers locally back when, I was told that would help me in case of a lawsuit. Fingers crossed!
Lizbeth wrote: "I used a blended approach and asked people who were listed in the book. Most of my 11 siblings got new names if there was any doubt, and then I omitted my former husband's last name. He is a main c..."Hope it all works out well for you. Be nice if you keep us up to date should any issues arise.
T.R. wrote: "Lizbeth wrote: "I used a blended approach and asked people who were listed in the book. Most of my 11 siblings got new names if there was any doubt, and then I omitted my former husband's last name..."Thank you! Will do.
Wow. A real range of opinions here. I'm concluding that you can do it anyway you want, as long as you let your readers know what your ground rules are, that you've changed some details/names, etc. . I personally have a hard time writing down anything that might hurt someone, though I've been advised by big-time editors that I should go ahead and put the dirt in there.
Barbara wrote: "Wow. A real range of opinions here. I'm concluding that you can do it anyway you want, as long as you let your readers know what your ground rules are, that you've changed some details/names, etc. ..."It is not them that have to face any outfall! And I agree with you, even if they may be considered to deserve it, I do not think it right to expose people unnecessarily. There is enough suffering in this life without us adding to it. Changing/omitting names etc. however, means you may in fact share the 'dirt' without concern. After all that is all part of our life stories and will inevitably interest readers.
I suspect that this is the reason that people started writing fiction -- short stories and novels -- in the first place. Fiction gives you so much more freedom to tell your truths. Still, I like memoirs better than fiction because they are written by real people addressing real events. I sometimes wonder if fiction lets you off the hook a little -- you can construct a reality (nicer or more gruesome) according to your bias about what the world is like.
What about the possibility of being sued?
Ruth wrote: "What about the possibility of being sued?"Always a possibility but unlikely if you change/omit names; locations; physical attributes. e.g. so the person cannot be easily identified from the content. Of course there is also the issue of whether they consider the content defamatory. But then it would have to be proven to be untrue. Always an awkward area and if you are seriously concerned may be worth while obtaining a solicitors/attorneys opinion. Helps if you also use a nom de plume
T.R. wrote: "Ruth wrote: "What about the possibility of being sued?"Always a possibility but unlikely if you change/omit names; locations; physical attributes. e.g. so the person cannot be easily identified f..."
Get an attorney to look at your manuscript before publication, for sure, for sure. I had a passage in mine that I thought was going to be OK, but attorney warned me in no uncertain terms that it could be trouble. The law is a lot more complicated than we lay people realize. For one thing, there are invasion of privacy issues as well as defamation.
Barbara wrote: Get an attorney to look at your manuscript before publication, for sure, for sure. ...I agree Barbara, I had an attorney (who knew all parties involved) to read through mine before publication just to be sure!
I used everyone's first name. Occasionally their last. Celebrities their full names. An Amazon reviewer said that I don't embellish truths. A publisher willing to publish said that I should first contact an attorney. He said as long as you tell the truth it doesn't matter. I heard differently. If a person you name is dead his family might be embarrassed by what you say about the person. None of this bothered me. I told it the way it was. One problem about being 100% truthful is that people don't believe you. Reviews on Amazon were great and they all saw the truth in my memoirs but my books don't sell. One man in my writer's group thought my book good but had to admit he'd rather read one that is not truthful but interesting. Strange, but true.I Had Jelly on My Nose and A Hole in My Breeches: The Memoir of A Boy on His Dangerous Journey
Robert wrote: "I used everyone's first name. Occasionally their last. Celebrities their full names. An Amazon reviewer said that I don't embellish truths. A publisher willing to publish said that I should first c..."Truth is not always a defense, especially not in invasasion of privacy cases . . . But truth is a great thing for writers who strive for it. It's more interesting than made-up stuff. And unlike something you write because it sounds like a good story, the hard truth causes you the writer to think and reflect and grow. That's good for your writing.
Memoir Authors
Books mentioned in this topic
I Had Jelly on My Nose and A Hole in My Breeches: The Memoir of A Boy on His Dangerous Journey (other topics)Walking Over Eggshells (other topics)
Walking Over Eggshells (other topics)
Walking Over Eggshells (other topics)
Walking Over Eggshells (other topics)
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until the older generation had passed away...."
I just ran across your old post. I, too, lost a dear friend over publishing a book about her ranch, which I wrote with her permission, changed her name and distinguishing details. She got cold feet at the last minute but I went ahead and published it anyway. It was a hard decision but I had spent 3 year on the book, which went on to win several awards.