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i have taken it upon myself to write some literature

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message 1: by Ari, god (new)

Ari S | 34 comments Mod
i am now writing a book on goodreads titled chone. here is the first chapter


message 2: by Ari, god (new)

Ari S | 34 comments Mod
one day chone bob was walking through chone world. as he strolled through chone world he ate everything that looked remotely edible. his mind wandered on his life and he asked himself how he ended up in wyoming the heartland of chone world. he remebered that day as he was walking home from school a incredibally awesome kid cut his hand off and yelled my hand. then ran away. normally he would have a problem with this but the kid was so awesome that he continued on his way home. later that day the same awesome kid through a dead animal at him. it smelled remarkably like santa claus. this is when bob started to chone it up. his eyes bulged his teeth shrunk and shrimp across the world set fire to thousands of local kmarts. suddenly bob was a full fledged chone. so he decided to go hang out at wall mart but when he got there the awesome kid had created a hostage situation involving a midget 3 toddlers and sam allon. the police kept him back. so bob decided to stay and watch. as the situation developed the awesome kid who we will call ari torched a howlween costume rack in his anger of not reciving barnies head on a stick and twelve short fat people who could do the german dance. the police getting frustrated sent 10 men whp tried to go in threw the roof, but the returned with large teeth like chunks out of them. many were also missing hands, and other body parts. then ari went absolutly balistic after sam tried to sell him his contact lenses. ari took the hands that he had taken from the officers, yelling my hand, and knocked sam unconssius. but by now the toddlers were restless and ari had to do something. so he fed them the midget and sedated them again. but then sam stumbled out of the wal-mart a few minutes later and 3 sleeping toddlers were thrown out a window. the police rushed in and tried to catch ari but it was too late. he had already taken over there souls and proceeded to eat the very core of them. thier mind and sprit. it tasted good! then ari left because bob was being a chone.


message 3: by Mario (last edited Nov 15, 2008 02:05PM) (new)

Mario | 91 comments BRAVISSIMO! I HAVE NEVER ENCOUNTERED SUCH AN EPIC. YOUR ALMOST BIBLICAL TALE SHAMES HERCULES, GILGAMESH, ODYSSEUS, AND THE LIKE. IT ARTFULLY BLENDS PHILOSOPHICAL MESSAGES, HEART-POUNDING ACTION, AND POETICALLY WORDED PROSE INTO A SALMAGUNDI OF SUPERLATIVENESS!
-M.M.

ROFLMAO. IT WAS 8337. I <3 IT. I CAHNET SHEPEAK ENGRISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WONG CHING CHONG, WONG CHING CHONG, LET'S ALL SING THE WATERCHESTNUT SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-S.S.

(WITH A NASAL INFLECTION OBVIOUSLY STEREOTYPING A CERTAIN GROUP OF PEOPLE DISTINGUISHED BY GARGANTUAN PROBOSCISES, MUTILATED ****S, AND SEEMINGLY INHUMAN LEVELS OF GREED) THE MERE MENTION OF THE STORES LIKE K-MART AND WAL-MART ARE SPECTACULAR IN THAT THEY INDIRECTLY REFERENCE PRICES AND THE TRANSACTION OF MONEY!
-J.E.W.


message 4: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Yeah chone it up Ari! And Mario don't do that love sign ever again. Unless you're gay. By the way I don't listen to you're voicemails I delete them immediately. Just stop with that shit man.


message 5: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments I only did the "<3" sign because it was in the context of being used by Scott.


message 6: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments As for the voicemails, I really don't care what the fuck you do with them because it's just too fun.


message 7: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Fuck Mario you don't understand. It's a complete waste of time for both of us. That includes you artard! If anything I just want you to realize how stupid it has gotten over time. Kids of Michael's age do prank calls, not mature highschoolers like you. Well I guess you're not mature at all actually. CCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

Haha way too tempting. But I hope you not only understand me but learn from it and do something about it.


message 8: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments HHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...
LET ME RESPOND TO THAT IN THE FOLLOWING WAY:





























F




























U

























C




























K

























Y

































O


























U
























!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





























































I SHALL NOT CEASE THE RANDOM PHONE CALLS.























THEY SHALL CONTINUE INDEFINITELY AT MY WHIM.


message 9: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments AWWWWW SALTY BRO!


message 10: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments I'M AFRAID THAT YOU HAVE TWO OPTIONS. YOU COULD DILIGENTLY DELETE ALL OF MY MESSAGES ONCE YOU RECEIVE THEM LIKE A GOOD LITTLE FAGGOT. ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU COULD MOVE TO LITHUANIA AND LIVE IN A FUCKING HOLE IN THE GROUND TO BE SEPARATED FROM ALL MEANS OF COMMUNICATION FROM THE CIVILIZED WORLD.

































































HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!


message 11: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Or option 3 which I like the most. I can beat you in life and then physically beat you up. How does that sound faggot? Remember I go to your schoool and last time I checked you're a fat pussy that can't do anything.


message 12: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments I HONESTLY DON'T CARE IF YOU CAN BEAT ME UP, FOR PHYSICAL SUPREMACY MEANS NOTHING IN OUR CURRENT SOCIETY. I'M SORRY MATT, BUT YOU MISSED THE STONE AGE BY A FEW THOUSAND YEARS. HA.


message 13: by Ari, god (new)

Ari S | 34 comments Mod
I LIKE MEN


message 14: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments NICE.


message 15: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Mario, do you not realize why people don't want to get beat up? Wow I really thought you were smarter but I should've reconsidered. Your street smarts are really equivalent to that of a poor baby, kind of like you. That's probably why even though you curse now you still look like a fool with no friends or life or sun because you never have an idea what the fuck you're talking about. Go knock up Marlina cause you're chances in the social world are dwindling away every second. Tick Tock Tick Tock.


message 16: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments Wow, do you really believe that social skills (playing b-ball and hanging out with future janitors such as Andrew B.) are more critical in life than intelligence and diligence. You really have a lot to learn before you acquire a decent career. Unless you want to fuck people in order to get a career, abstain the drinking of Mug brand root beer and 80s in your classes.















HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


message 17: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments The thing is chone fag, I have A's and if anything b plusses. And I have obviously a better life than you. Face it you're not in the position to talk. Give it up loser.


message 18: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Haha and I just want to point out that you CONTINUOUSLY IGNORE YOUR OWN PROBLEMS. I'm pretty sure if you think you know it, you do. Please, don't use foul language like you're cooler than you are, cause you honestly look like a fucking idiot that has no life. Oh you know how you tell me it's high school and I better do well in my classes? Well I took your advice and I'm doing fine. But let me tell you: This is high school so don't screw up your life and social skills, cause if you do it too late which it already could be, it will affect you for the rest of your life. Don't you realize to have a job like you want, like a head of a cooperation or assistant, you have to have people skills and be comfortable talking to girls haha. Seriously, learn not to be so awkward and you'll find it much easier. Your english skills are good vocabulary wise but repulsive when talking to new people or the female gender. Fool trust me, I've set myself up better for the future than you, my socially challenged friend. Embrace the fact and learn from it, or your life will be very difficult when you do have a job.


message 19: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments Actually, I won't have to utilize that many social skills like knowing what the word "chone" means and wearing my pants below my ass (I know you don't, but others do) in order to be an anesthesiologist. I'll be sticking fucking tubes into people for 400K a year. As for my vocabulary, you shouldn't be so blatantly jealous for my superior command of the language. Furthermore, I could easily dumb myself down for others such as yourself in order to be more accepted, but I choose not to because it distinguishes myself from the masses of idiots who waste their lives trying to build up "reps" at high school and then having to wash the exotic cars of socially inept people such as myself. DEAL WITH IT.


message 20: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments HA.


message 21: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Mario you are so pathetic. Even if you dumbed yourself down, you wouldn't have better social skills. Being cool isn't your field. But that doesn't mean you have to be bad socially. Don't act like you're smarter than everyone else, cause ur common sense and street smarts are terrible. Just don't try to act cool or curse a lot. This is why you can't understand my point. You don't have to be stupid to be socially accepted. In fact it can help you. But you're currently just an exception. Hear me out: IT's NOT NECISSARILY BEING COOL, IT's HAVING PEOPLE SKILLS. PEOPLE SKILLS HELP OUT IN ALL PARTS OF LIFE. AND IN MOST CASES BEING SMART HELPS WITH THAT. But you're either too stupid or are just in denial to realize textbook stuff. Face your problem and accept it. Don't act like everyone's stupid except you. Don't be cool, just adapt PEOPLE SKILLS. it WILL help you later in life. You're my fucking friend. Take my advice from a friend. I'm doing very well in school Mario so don't worry. Get better talking cause even a tube person or surgeon NEEDS to talk to people. Communication is vital for a job like that. I'm not trying to be mean, it's just your ignorant comments get me frustrated. Help yourself and take my advice.


message 22: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments IN RESPONSE TO YOUR ULTIMATE SENTENCE, SCREW YOU.


message 23: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments I LOVE IT HOW YOU PREACH ABOUT MAKING THE BEST OF YOUR TIME BUT YOU WRITE 200 WORD PARAGRAPHS.


message 24: by Mario (last edited Nov 19, 2008 03:04PM) (new)

Mario | 91 comments IT'S CLEAR THAT YOU HAVE YOUR OWN VIEWS ABOUT WHAT IS NEEDED TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL LIFE. I RESPECT YOUR RIGHT TO HAVE YOUR CONVICTIONS EVEN THOUGH I FEEL AS THOUGH YOU ARE WORSENING YOUR CHANCES OF OWNING AN OLYMPIC-SIZED SWIMMING POOL FULL OF $1 BILLS THAT YOU CAN ROLL AROUND IN EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY. I ALSO UNDERSTAND HOW YOU CAN BE CONCERNED ABOUT MY SOCIAL SKILLS, BUT YOU FAIL TO COMPREHEND THE INTERACTIONS NECESSARY FOR THE PROFESSION THAT I HAVE IN MIND FOR MYSELF TO BECOME A PRACTITIONER OF. AN ANESTHESIOLOGIST WALKS INTO THE E.R. EVERY DAY (OR NIGHT, FOR THAT MATTER) AND INSERTS TUBES INTO THE PATIENT. AN ANESTHESIOLOGIST TALKS TO HIS COLLEAGUES ON COURSES OF ACTION AND RECOMMENDATIONS FOR A SALMAGUNDI OF PROCEDURES. I'M AFRAID THAT "STREET SMARTS" DON'T FIT INTO THAT SERIES OF EVENTS. IN PERIODS OF TIME BEFORE AND AFTER WORKING, AN ANESTHESIOLOGIST MAY CONVERSE CASUALLY WITH HIS FELLOW PHYSICIANS ABOUT HOW THEIR LIVES ARE GOING, CURRENT EVENTS, OR ANY OTHER TOPICS OF CONVERSATION THAT MAY BE APPLICABLE. TRAINED PROFESSIONALS WOULD NEVER DEGRADE THEMSELVES TO THE POINT OF "BEING COOL", BECAUSE NORMAL ADULTS DON'T HAVE TO CARRY THEMSELVES ABOUT IN SUCH A MORONICALLY IMMATURE MANNER. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT "BEING COOL" WILL ONLY SERVE YOU TO THE EXTENT OF BEING MORE RECOGNIZED BY YOUR SADLY EQUALLY FOOLISH PEERS WHO LIVE THEIR LIVES ACCORDING TO HOW OTHERS LIVE THEIR LIVES, WHICH IS STUCK IN THE PRESENT WITHOUT ANY DECENT FORESIGHT FOR THEM TO LOOK AHEAD AND SEE THEIR FUTURE SELVES (WHICH THEY PERHAPS CHOOSE NOT TO BECAUSE THEY, EVEN IN THEIR DEMENTEDLY SOPHOMORIC MINDS, ARE ABLE TO SEE HOW MUCH THEY WILL BE FAILURES AS ADULTS)? IF YOU DO NOT GRASP THAT CONCEPT, THEN I PITY YOU, FOR YOU WILL JOIN YOUR B-BALLIN' PALS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SOCIAL LADDER.


message 25: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments BY THE WAY, THE REASON WHY I DECIDED TO COMMENCE CURSING AFTER SEVERAL YEARS OF ABSTAINING FROM DOING SO WAS THAT I REALIZED THAT THE INFREQUENT USAGE OF SUCH VOLATILE WORDS EXPRESS EMOTIONS WITH MORE VIVIDNESS AND ACCURACY. I DON'T CURSE TO "FIT IN". IN FACT, I FIND PEOPLE WHO CURSE TO "BUILD A REP" SUCH AS BEN K. TO BE PATHETIC LITTLE BASTARDS (DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?).


message 26: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments ALSO, I'M NOT LACKING IN PEOPLE SKILLS. PEOPLE SKILLS ARE SAYING "HELLO" OR "HI" WHEN A PERSON GREETS YOU OR APPEARS BEFORE YOU. THEY ARE BASIC SKILLS IN COMMUNICATION THAT PERTAIN TO OUR CULTURE. AS MUCH AS I KNOW THAT YOU DESPISE HIM, I KNOW THAT YOU HAVE TO ADMIT THAT EVEN BEN K. IS SOMEWHAT PROFICIENT IN PEOPLE SKILLS.


message 27: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments I THINK THAT I HAVE SHOT YOUR LITTLE PLANE OF FOOLISHNESS WITH ENOUGH METAPHORICAL FLAK OF REASON FOR ONE NIGHT.


message 28: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Well Mario I do get you but we have our own opinions and there's no reason to go personal. Ben K. is just weird haha. Don't talk about him. I'm on like 4 other things at the same time so don't worry about how I spend my time. Actually, I appreciate how you're different from me, but it can make me really angry at you when you think you're ways are so much better. Please just realize there's more than one way of life, and I don't care how smart you are, there's not one way that's perfect. The only real advice I can have for everybody's way of life is confidence which you have in what you do. But just don't get too confident, that's where you make friends enemies. I'm not wasting time, I'm on 5 other sites at the same time. This cumulatively took me 20 mins to type. Let's settle down and focus on Michael and be confident. That's all I have to say. Haha and it was pretty long too.


message 29: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY, WHAT 5 SITES WERE YOU PREVIOUSLY ON SIMULTANEOUSLY?


message 30: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Itunes, AIM, Facebook, stoga.net, and madgravityradio.com. Do you agree with what I said above though? Can we just leave it at that cause an arguement like this always goes nowhere.


message 31: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments IT SEEMS AS IF YOUR MOTHER'S TEACHINGS HAVE ACTUALLY AUGMENTED YOUR PSYCHO-ANALYTIC CAPABILITIES. WE REALLY DID REACH AN IMPASSE, ANYWAY, SO FURTHER DELINIATION WAS IN VAIN.


message 32: by Mario (new)

Mario | 91 comments WHY WERE YOU ON TWO DIFFERENT MUSIC WEBSITES AT THE SAME TIME? IT SEEMS REDUNDANT.


message 33: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments madgravityradio is a game website more than it is music. So uh we finally get to focus on Michael cause that arguement seriously was dumb as shit.


message 34: by Matt (new)

Matt | 18 comments Haha we go to the same school artard. We're friends. Kind of like the opposite of everyone's relationship to you.


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