It Came From the Internet

[Melki]

[Lisa]

And besides, he can't resist her smashing him over the head with the final couple of (full) bottles while he's passed out.

[Lisa]

And's she'll do it while wearing this shirt:

img src="http://www.despair.com/superioritee.html"

[Melki]

I love Despair, Inc.

I want to get my husband this one -

http://www.despair.com/get-off-my-law...

Though he's only in his forties, I've already heard him say that to someone.

[Rebecca]

Heck, my 15-y.o. is big on that one. Not that we have a lawn. But he's a total curmudgeon about little kids. I have to remind him that he, too, Was once a crying baby.

[Melki]

Welcome back, Rebecca! We missed you!

[Rebecca]

Thanks, Melki! We had a great time, but man, the laundry! Speaking of which (scuttles off to the basement to check on the latest load. . . ).

[Melki]

Too bad disposable clothes never caught on.

[Rebecca]

Ha! And I'm washing EVERYTHING, including duffles and backpacks (have to do those by hand in the tub, but sheesh, all that cowpoop and donkey dung. . . ).

[Lisa]

Cowpoop and donkey dung? Jeesh, Rebecca. You sure do know how to have a good time! Welcome back.

[Rebecca]

I didn't even know cows could graze up over 15,000'. But I'm pretty sure at this point that there is no non-iced-over piece of the Andes that isn't being grazed by someone's flock/herd of something. I left out the sheep droppings and alpaca pellets.

[Melki]

Rebecca wrote: "I left out the sheep droppings and alpaca pellets."

Wait - we're not talking about food on a stick anymore, are we?

[Rebecca]

No! We are back to laundry, and why I'm washing the backpacks. And duffles. And wondering if I could bleach my hiking boots.

[Melki]

You're going to need another vacation after this.
Or a two week nap.

[Rebecca]

Happily, I don't go back to work for another week. The nap sounds good, though. Travel is great, but I ALWAYS need a vacation to recover from our vacations. Usually I don't need antibiotics too, but there was that trip to Glacier four years ago when I got pneumonia. . .

[Lisa]

I just learned I will never be able to go to Turkey: http://www.hurriyetdailynews.com/wome...

[Rebecca]

That's pretty disgusting, Lisa. I hope he doesn't get any more power, like enough to start passing laws making it a crime for women to laugh out loud in public.

[Lisa]

So now we know inspected boneless rectums wind up here: http://www.neatorama.com/2014/06/22/F...

But where do you suppose the uninspected ones wind up?

Suddenly, I think I'm only eating vegetarian dishes while dining out.

[Rodney]

Unrealistic Stock Photos Of Parenting With Hilarious, More Relatable Captions.

http://www.sunnyskyz.com/blog.php?blo...

[Will]

Doncha just wish there was an alternate universe where we could combine the subject matter of Rodney's and Lisa's links?

[Rebecca]

Rodney wrote: "Unrealistic Stock Photos Of Parenting With Hilarious, More Relatable Captions.

http://www.sunnyskyz.com/blog.php?blo......"

Those things just make me howl with laughter. I especially like the white couch feeding. I need to figure out how to add a photo to show some of the REAL toddler-feeding photos!

[Jim]

Rodney wrote: "Unrealistic Stock Photos Of Parenting With Hilarious, More Relatable Captions...."

Oh, those are good! When my kids ate, they looked more like this.

[Rebecca]

Yeah, Jim, that's the look I was going for, but with less pink :D

[Rodney]

Jim wrote: "Rodney wrote: "Unrealistic Stock Photos Of Parenting With Hilarious, More Relatable Captions...."

Oh, those are good! When my kids ate, they looked more like this.

"

That's because you forgot to feed them on a white couch.

[Melki]

White couches - HA!

Do I have the only kids in the world who eat Cheetos then wipe their hands on the arms of the furniture?

I don't even own any white CLOTHING!

[Melki]

Some of you will enjoy ogling the girl in the costume and some of you will enjoy reading the reviews by actual female PhDs: http://www.amazon.com/Delicious-Women...

[Jim]

We try to keep some shade of brown for furniture, floors, & such. Our kids are grown, but we have horses, goats, & 4 dogs. The latter sleep in our beds & on the furniture. They're cleaner than the kids ever were, but none of us are ever sparkly clean.

Very nice PHD costume. I liked the Naughty Nun the best, though.
;)

[Will]

Yes, well, um. What people do in the privacy of their own homes is their own business. Many a happy and stable relationship has been enlivened by a private dressing up box.

So I'm told.

But what in the name of all that is holy is the attraction of dressing up as a dinosaur or Nemo? That's Nemo the fish not Nemo the submariner.

And is it just me or is there something vaguely yucky about the idea that there is a returns policy for this garment?

96% polyester? Hmmm ... that's a quality garment.

[Melki]

Will wrote: "96% polyester? Hmmm ... that's a quality garment."

Don't stand near an open flame, or the costume will morph into Delicious Woman's Sexy Human-Torch Disguise.

[Rebecca]

LOL. Such nice comments in the reviews! Of course, the realit is that by the time you have survived the pummeling that is the PhD process, you are about 90, and look older.

[Rodney]

Will wrote: "But what in the name of all that is holy is the attraction of dressing up as a dinosaur or Nemo? That's Nemo the fish not Nemo the submariner.
"

Of course Nemo the submariner should be excluded from that comment. he's dead sexy!

[Rodney]

Some of these kids need to be beaten and some of them need medals.

http://www.toofab.com/2014/11/04/jimm...

[Rodney]

This is ... no words can describe.

http://www.incrediblethings.com/video...

But when you've recovered this is cool.

http://www.incrediblethings.com/art-d...

[Rodney]

I ran across the music group OK Go several years ago and have been a big fan of their videos. The music is alright, but the videos are very impressive. They have come out with a new video that is just as incredible as any of their past performances. Geeks playing music, gotta love it.

http://okgo.net/2014/10/24/watch-the-...

And yes, its been a slow day...

[Melki]

Rodney wrote: "I ran across the music group OK Go several years ago and have been a big fan of their videos. The music is alright, but the videos are very impressive. They have come out with a new video that is j..."

You're right. I've enjoyed all their videos, but they really outdid themselves with that last one.

[Melki]

I think this appropriately sums up the current state of television:

[Rodney]

This absolutely describes when I want to be approached in the morning.

[Rebecca]

Rodney--can you make it bigger? I can't see even with my old-lady glasses!

[Melki]

I can't find that exact image, but you can buy one here:

http://www.signals.com/cgi-bin/hazel....

[Rodney]

Rebecca wrote: "Rodney--can you make it bigger? I can't see even with my old-lady glasses!"

Better?

[Rebecca]

Rodney wrote: "Rebecca wrote: "Rodney--can you make it bigger? I can't see even with my old-lady glasses!"

Better?"

Yes!

And need I say I'm glad this forum doesn't have an Out of Context thread?

[Rodney]

I'm just glad I could go back and make it bigger for you...

[CartoonistAndre]

Said Rodney: 'This absolutely describes when I want to be approached in the morning.'

You nailed it! That would probably sell well at Dazzle or Cafe Press, Rodney. Just choose one (or several) classy fonts, draw your line and 'pimp your cuppa'!

[Lisa]

I think I need a wine glass done in similar style.

[Rebecca]

And I have sort of a reversal of that as the evening progresses, until by about 10 p.m. I don't want to be spoken to (or at least don't want to make a response).

[Rodney]

My bourbon and Coke glass would need to have the Shhh at the bottom...

[Lisa]

Oh . . . my . . . http://tinyurl.com/pnlulkq My favorite line from the article is: “ 'I think I also want to give a bit of respect and new concept to the Miss Bum Bum title by being a virgin,' she said."

Now there's a woman with service to mankind as a primary goal!

[Rebecca]

Lisa wrote: "Oh . . . my . . . http://tinyurl.com/pnlulkq My favorite line from the article is: “ 'I think I also want to give a bit of respect and new concept to the Miss Bum Bum title by being a virgin,' she..."

And I love how she thinks that being a virgin can be reset! Uh, no.

[Rodney]

Thats a lot of money to be spent on an alteration that's so short lived. Apparently she can't keep a lid on her "funds".

[Joel]

Apropos.

http://www.clickhole.com/article/ever...