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Weird Stuff > It Came From the Internet

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message 651: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments Lisa wrote: "Actually, someone made it easy for me to share the "brilliance" of the young philosopher: http://www.nme.com/blogs/nme-blogs/th......"

I think the lad needs to have the bong taken away for a day or two and made to reread his own ramblings on a continuous loop.


message 652: by Melki (new)

Melki | 3540 comments Mod
Punish him by making him listen to his sister's 'Whip My Hair' song over and over again.


message 653: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments Ah 14, the age when you know everything. except this time he's willing to tell us and has good press. We should all heed the wisdom of a youth that has never experienced anything more tragic than the batteries of his IPod going out.


message 654: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments Can't imagine asking him to clean his room or anything.


message 655: by Brenda (new)

Brenda Kearns (brendakearns) | 719 comments LOL! Could approach that kid with the kind, gentle grace that I use with MY early teens. "You have 24 hours to clean your room, or I'm doing the damned job for you." Since I "clean" rooms using big green garbage bags, and since THEY'RE required to pay for all of their own clothing and supplies with their allowance, that seems to knock the know-it-all snot-nosed attitude out of them reeeally quickly.


message 656: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
Actually, you can threaten to completely disable any teen at any time. Simply threaten to call the phone company and block texting on their phone. The Sword of Damocles wasn't nearly this effective.

"OMG! It's Armageddon!!"


message 657: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments Jay wrote: "Actually, you can threaten to completely disable any teen at any time. Simply threaten to call the phone company and block texting on their phone. The Sword of Damocles wasn't nearly this effective..."

Yes! I'm am known as the most evil man in the world, as I have used that trick more than once. Very effective.


message 658: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments Ah! Fiendishly clever.


message 659: by Brenda (new)

Brenda Kearns (brendakearns) | 719 comments Rodney wrote: "Jay wrote: "Actually, you can threaten to completely disable any teen at any time. Simply threaten to call the phone company and block texting on their phone. The Sword of Damocles wasn't nearly th..."

I pulled that little chip thing out of my oldest daughter's phone when I discovered her trying to text AND do her chore at the same time. Her chore that week was to groom the cats, so she was walking around behind one of the cats, absentmindedly brushing it, while texting with the other hand. She looked like such an idiot that I felt compelled to disable the phone for a few weeks so she would be forced to lift her head up and I could see what she looked like.


message 660: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?


message 661: by Brenda (new)

Brenda Kearns (brendakearns) | 719 comments Rebecca wrote: "Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?"

Awesome! Good for you! I got rid of my cell phone six months ago - I'm SO glad :-)


message 662: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
Rebecca wrote: "Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?"

Rebecca, why didn't you tell us before that you'd adopted a couple of Amish kids?

Brenda, I ditched the landline more than ten years ago. The phone company still sends me hate mail.


message 663: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Rebecca wrote: "Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?"

I'm blown away, Rebecca! Isn't one in college or soon to be? I don't think I've met a 13-year old within the past 10 years or so who doesn't own a cell phone (except for a those either in police custody or who live in a group home that we service).


message 664: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Jay wrote: "I ditched the landline more than ten years ago. The phone company still sends me hate mail."

I can almost say the same, Jay. I kept our landline for a long while because of an aging relative who didn't understand cell phones. After he passed away I learned if I got rid of the service for it, my internet would be more expensive. Somehow it's cheaper to have a "bundle" of service. Go figure. So it's still hanging on the wall. Occasionally it gets dusted.


message 665: by CartoonistAndre (last edited Dec 07, 2015 06:06PM) (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments HOLD MY BEER!

From a couple of Rednecks named Buck n Doe


message 666: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
Brenda wrote: "Rebecca wrote: "Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?"

Awesome! Good for you! I got rid of my cell phone six mon..."


Actually, it's a little problematic, since especially the older one (the one at college) has almost a phobia about phones. He does Skype (with his brother) and email (when he needs something), so he's not totally opposed to communication. Just mostly.

I want to stress that I didn't set out to do this. But my husband & I didn't get cell phones until maybe 3 or 4 years ago, when we got a couple of pay-as-you-go types for use on road trips. Last year first he and then I upgraded to smart phones, finally giving in to the usefulness of cellular data, especially maps, after some spectacular blind wanderings.

Apparently by that time,the boys had imprinted on the "phones are evil" idea. The younger one is now noting that he'd kind of like one, and ideally a smart phone. I pointed out that smart phones are expensive, and suggested that he could have one of the dumb phones. I need to look into setting it up for international travel, since he's the one with the travel bug.


message 667: by Brenda (new)

Brenda Kearns (brendakearns) | 719 comments Jay wrote: "Rebecca wrote: "Will you all hate me if I say that my boys don't have phones, don't want them, and have never sent a text in their lives?"

Rebecca, why didn't you tell us before that you'd adopted..."


That's funny - you ditched your landline, I ditched my cell. Either is good, as far as I'm concerned - saves money :-)


message 668: by Melki (new)

Melki | 3540 comments Mod
I have to confess to being Amish; none of us own cell phones. I'm always amazed at how much people use their phones. I may make one call every two weeks, if that.

Who is everyone talking to?


message 669: by Rodney (last edited Dec 08, 2015 09:48AM) (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments I have a smart phone, but I only use it to connect into the work computers so I can do my job and smoke a cigarette in the parking lot. I also use it to play games, get directions, and brows the web. Nobody calls me on it, except Angela.

Yes I smoke...Don't worry I'm wearing my red star.


message 670: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
Likely, most of us are talking occasionally to work and a few friends. The rest of the time, we're hanging up on telemarketers.


message 671: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Melki wrote: "I have to confess to being Amish; none of us own cell phones. I'm always amazed at how much people use their phones. I may make one call every two weeks, if that.

Who is everyone talking to?"


I didn't realize people used their phones to actually talk to people...


message 672: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Melki wrote: "I have to confess to being Amish; none of us own cell phones. I'm always amazed at how much people use their phones. I may make one call every two weeks, if that.

Who is everyone talking to?"


Wait a minute!!! Stop the presses. That line just completely sunk in. Your sons don't even have cell phones?

How do they communicate with their friends? How do they order pizza when you're not home? How do they do their honors chemistry homework without the app? How do they get the Remind101 messages from their teachers that come via text only? How do they listen to music?

Though, admittedly, my son plays vinyl LPs on a record player. However, the majority of his music is from up-and-coming bands that only come on EPs).


message 673: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
What do I use a phone for? Mostly, calling my Mom, and calling my husband to remind him that by 10 p.m., most of the rest of the faculty has gone home, and maybe he should, too.

I use the cell phone to exchange texts with my best friend, who is enough younger than I am that she is most comfortable with texting. I have recently also started texting with my Mom, which is kind of fun. Keeps us a little more in touch between phone calls.


message 674: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments I use my phone to post on Goodreads and perhaps I shouldn't. On my computer I can edit a response but on my phone I can't. Hence, you'll just have to imaging the word "phone" after "their" in my earlier post. ~sigh~


message 675: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments description


message 676: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments We also don't use smartphones, Rebecca. I carry a flip phone when I go out and text only when necessary. $15 bucks per month. We still depend mostly on the landline and the cordless technology still manages to astound us. We're thinking of getting a tablet but not sure which.

Introverts? Where do I sign up? I'm already signed up for the Extrovert group but they keep running off.


message 677: by Joel (new)

Joel Bresler | 1587 comments Mod
I don't own a smart phone. I still think these computer things are just a fad.


message 678: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
While I have reservations about smart phones, and for that matter the internet, I whole-heartedly embraced the computer the first time I wrote and edited a term paper with a word processor* (well, actually the internet is a great place for introverts, so maybe I'll embrace it too).

*That was my senior year in college


message 679: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Here's something I just found on the. Internet (via my phone 'cause what else are you to do when you're waiting at the mechanics for a "quick" oil change): dogs line up with the earth's pokes to poop.

https://www.thedodo.com/dogs-poop-in-...


message 680: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments I meant "poles" -- I hit "post" accidentally while trying to wipe off a smudge from my screen.


message 681: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments Maybe the earth poking them helps them poop.


message 682: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
A further study found that most people completely ignore pole alignment while stepping in it.


message 683: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments I was reading my thread and this was mentioned in it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCzZo...

I normally don't think this kind of thing is funny, but this made me laugh.


message 684: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments I swear whoever came up with the concept of runway models had a sadistic sense of humor. "Let's see what happens when you force women with spindly ankles to wear shoes pitched to an 85-degree angle and tell them they have to walk like pigeon-toed drunks."


message 685: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
Those women are a great advertisement for running shoes.


message 686: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
I have a brother who's an orthopedic surgeon. You'd be surprised at the number of female patients he sees who have fallen off their ridiculous shoes!


message 687: by Rebecca (new)

Rebecca Douglass (rdouglass) | 2433 comments Mod
Jay wrote: "I have a brother who's an orthopedic surgeon. You'd be surprised at the number of female patients he sees who have fallen off their ridiculous shoes!"

I'm not surprised at all. There's a reason I won't wear those nasty things.


message 688: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments Rebecca wrote: "I'm not surprised at all. There's a reason I won't wear those nasty things. "

Me either...


message 689: by Lisa (new)

Lisa Shiroff | 840 comments Is this part of the war on Christmas?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5nX7...

If so, it's the funniest battle maneuver ever.


message 690: by CartoonistAndre (last edited Dec 10, 2015 05:59PM) (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments But it's appealing to the kids! They're being drawn in subliminally. You know, seeing this, they now think satan is kinda cutesy. Well, let me tell you, he's not! He's a big DumbAss and if Jesus doesn't kick his ass, God will! God willing, there is a God, of course...


message 691: by Melki (new)

Melki | 3540 comments Mod
But, but, but . . . why would snowmen hail Satan? They obviously can't go to live in his kingdom. There would be a snowball's chance in hell of their surviving the visit.

Now, elves, on the other hand, have always seemed like The Big Red One's minions to me.


message 692: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments Depends on the dominion, haven't you ever heard of cold as hell?


message 693: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments I've heard elves talking and you're right, they do conspire with the Dark Side. I've noticed our garden elves seem to be edging closer to the house each day.


message 694: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments I believe garden elves are attracted to dirt. LOL


message 695: by Joel (last edited Dec 11, 2015 09:12AM) (new)

Joel Bresler | 1587 comments Mod
CartoonistAndre wrote: "I've heard elves talking and you're right, they do conspire with the Dark Side. I've noticed our garden elves seem to be edging closer to the house each day."

There's even a city in Alaska called Gnome. I think. It's probably cold there, being Alaska and everything.


message 696: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
Elves, dwarves... Even Satan wouldn't put up with those tiny, grating voices chanting or singing. I also have it on rather questionable authority that he was also kicked out of the garden, so no available elf storage.


message 697: by Rodney (new)

Rodney Carlson (rodneycarlson) | 617 comments That's too bad, because I hear all you need is a shelf.


message 698: by Jay (new)

Jay Cole (jay_cole) | 5436 comments Mod
Shelves burn. Nobody wants barbecued elf for the holidays.


message 699: by Melki (new)

Melki | 3540 comments Mod
Jay wrote: "Shelves burn. Nobody wants barbecued elf for the holidays."

True. Roasting makes for the tastiest elf. Don't forget to put the sprig of mistletoe in his mouth before you put him in the oven.


message 700: by CartoonistAndre (new)

CartoonistAndre | 725 comments Well, catching one is near impossible, they scamper around like squirrels, And, Melki, along with that sprig I suggest stuffing him with a generous portion of Lucky Charms- always hated that smarmy lil' bastid leprechaun, and those noisy Kellogs elves could be annoying.


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