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Affectionate Dads
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I can speak of my best friend Rick-I was with him when he told his folks oh so many years ago. His Mum and dad were sad but I will always recall his dad's response;;he said: Rick, honey, your Mom and I will always love you--we may not understand this right now but we still love you and we'll make this work. Coming from a racist and bigoted home as I did, I thought it was the loveliest thing I have ever heard--still do today so many years later.
Sammy, that's so sweet; unconditional acceptance at its best. We don't understand and we still love you.
My husband is really affectionate dad. He will meet one of my friends for the first time and hug them like he has known them for years. I dont think he would have a problem if one of our kids comes out. He would go to a gay club with them if they ask, he goes with me.
Sammy2006 wrote: "I can speak of my best friend Rick-I was with him when he told his folks oh so many years ago. His Mum and dad were sad but I will always recall his dad's response;;he said: Rick, honey, your Mom ..."But Sammy, how was his Dad before? Did he always show affection to Rick? Did they hug and kiss before he came out?
Sammy2006 wrote: "I can speak of my best friend Rick-I was with him when he told his folks oh so many years ago. His Mum and dad were sad but I will always recall his dad's response;;he said: Rick, honey, your Mom ..."But Sammy, how was his Dad before? Did he always show affection to Rick? Did they hug and kiss before he came out?
Summer wrote: "My husband is really affectionate dad. He will meet one of my friends for the first time and hug them like he has known them for years. I dont think he would have a problem if one of our kids comes..."Hey, Summer. You say you don't think he would have a problem if one boy comes out to him. Did you guys never openly discuss the issue? You seem so accepting yourself, but did you ever discuss with your kids that you would love them no matter if they're gay or straight? Lori told me that she brought up the issue with her son Dalton before he brought it up. And I know that helped him come out with much less stress. It would be great if parents informed their kids early on that they'll love them no mater what. I know you will by all your comments, but I just wonder if you told your kids how you feel.
Scylar wrote: "Sammy2006 wrote: "I can speak of my best friend Rick-I was with him when he told his folks oh so many years ago. His Mum and dad were sad but I will always recall his dad's response;;he said: Rick..."Oh yeah--Rick's Dad and Mom were Arthur Murray instructors--does anyone remember Arthur Murray dance studios?? In fact Rick's Dad gave me and my hubby to be lessons before our wedding--so smooth-- that man could glide on a dance floor--as can Rick. But anyway--most definitely--Rick's Mom and Dad were the neighborhood parents--everyone went to them for comfort, band-aids, etc. They took good care of me--my Mom died when I was 2 and my father was, well, let's just say he was distant...Rick's Dad was just like my Rick--loving, caring--it did not surprise me how they reacted-even being staunch catholics. Still scarier than hell though when we went to tell them that their baby was gay.
Scylar, I'm a very open minded Mom. My kids are 12, 9, 5, and 4. My four year old told me last week that girls kiss boys, girls can kiss girls, and boys can kiss boys. It's ok because love is beautiful. I can die a proud mama because she has listened to what I've said. My husband's uncle is gay and has been with the same partner for 32 years. We talked about their love and how its okay to be in love with the same sex. I said I didn't think he would have a problem if one of our kids came out because you never know how people will react, that's all.
Justin - this is the most beautiful group!! hehe
SO I would like to know from the gay teens and men in this group if your dad was one of those sweet men who always showed you affection, or if he was one of those touch-me-nots.
As for as my dad was concerned, he was very sweet. And even when I was in my teens, and all his life, I never shook his hands. Not once. We always hugged and kissed on the cheeks. ANd I was never ashamed, and he was never ashamed. But yet, I was still never able to bring myself to tell him I was gay. So it was more that I was afraid to hurt him. I wonder if it would have been easier if he had not been so sweet.
Also, you wonderful women can discuss what you saw with your dads and brothers, etc. Was it easier for your brother, etc, to come out to a sweet dad? Or even harder?