Haiku Showing 1,301-1,350 of 8,460

[Caitlan]

Oh goodness. You guys got busy XD

[Caitlan]

Haha. (Giggles uproariously)

[Guy]

Incredible, M. RotFL! Working 'mummy's cajones' into a rhymed haiku is, well, nothing short of brilliant! LoL!

[M]

He followed, by some
dim declension, the trail from
dummy to dumber,

and by methods too
silly to mention, turned from
mummy to mummer.

He threw down his cards,
took his findings, and soon was
dividing by thirds,

writhing, stripping off
his old windings in scenes from
strange plays without words.

[Guy]

M, this is so hard to follow. Here's my best, albeit anemic, effort.


To play without words
The mummer went mum, and mom
Made her old man dumb.

'What was to be done?
What is a world without words?'
The mum mummer mouthed.

The mummy played scenes,
A pantomime to enrapt
Mom dumb and dumber.

Mummy and mummer
Muffled the meany mommy
Making her most mute.

[M]

Guy, the haiku chain you posted is wonderful! I just read it aloud to Jane. What in the world rhymes with “meany mommy”?

[Guy]

TY! What does Jane think of these verbal gambols?

I have no idea! Teeny tummy? Weenie scummy? LoL!

[M]

Philosophers all
over the Earth pondered what
made mommy meany,

until a think tank
down in Perth found she’d had too
much Beanie Weenie.

She suffered greatly
day and night until a mad
doctor in Reno,

on vacation, read
of her plight and mailed her a
packet of Beano.

[Guy]

RotL!

Still laughing!

How do you come up with these so fast?

Still laughing.

Now it's time for me to go and make our breakfast.

[M]

They’re supposed to make you laugh and want to post the next one! Oh, well. I guess I had better go out and mow. I’ve been procrastinating for days.

[Guy]

Hello, Al. How are we going to follow this one?

[Guy]

This may promote gastro-intestinal turbulence, but how about


Before the beano
The mostly muted mummy
Muffled her B-flats.

[Guy]

Al, your haiku compare beautifully to any written. Jump in! I'm iPadding now, and so my response time is slow.

[Guy]

Nice Al. It made me think up the following:


Beans before beano
Gave to the mummy's tummy
Dusty flatulence.

[Guy]

LoL!

Now I'm off to make green tomato pickles.

[M]

“Cloud of some sort dead
ahead, Captain,” Lieutenant
Uhura soon said.

“Let’s not go all red
alerty,” Kirk smiled, “till we
have to kick some ass.”

“Sensor readings,” said
Spock, “show dirty--uhm, pardon
me--dusty bean gas.”

[M]

Uhura sniffed with
clear distaste. “It’s certainly
a gas to cringe in!”

“Perhaps,” said Spock, “in
fear and haste, some crew has fed
beans to their engine.”

[Caitlan]

This is brilliant guys. Alas, I don't know a lot about Star Trek, so I'll have to sit this one out.

[M]

It hadn’t occurred to me (but occurs to me now) that “Star Trek” has become a show old folks remember, the way old people remembered radio shows such as “Amos and Andy” or “Our Gal Sunday” when I was growing up. Yikes!

[Caitlan]

I've seen some of them, enough to know who everyone is, but not enough to attempt to continue the haiku's XD

[M]

Giles adjusted his
glasses. “I don’t recognize
it.” “I do,” said Spike.

“It’s dusty bean gas.
You’ll despise it. There’s nothing
about it to like.”

[Guy]

LoL.

Okay, it's taken a while writing on the iPad, but here's my contribution.

Where, how to begin?
The Enterprise was a gas
In more than the mess.

It was Finnegan
In the engine's wake who was
Keeping them awake.

Chekov up chucked bones
On Spoc's spotless deck shoes—
So Sulu said he saw.

Scotty barked 'Aye, aye!'
And beamed with the sexy thoughts
Of Uhura's voice.

The captain was dazed
And waxed his piece poetic
But sadly un-phased.

All the while the gas,
A life form evolved from beans,
Was making whoopee.

[M]

What wordplay! Guy, this one will be exceedingly hard to follow.

[Guy]

Glad you enjoyed that. I look forward to your efforts. I know that they will easily surpass this discordant panoply.

And your comment about being old is so funny because it is so true. Remember when we would make fun of the 'old folks' for being square because they weren't current. LoL.

For some reason this reminds me of when Feste, from Twelfth Night when he confronts the gulled and gecked Malvolio:

Feste
I was one, sir, in this enterlude—one Sir Topas, sir, but that's
all one. "By the Lord, fool, I am not mad." But do you remember?
"Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal? And you smile
not, he's gagg'd." And thus the whirligig of time brings in his
revenges.

Malvolio
I'll be reveng'd on the whole pack of you (5.1.372–78)

Our ignorance of what the 'whirligig of time' brings gives us the delusion of courage that enables us to mock that which we do not undersand — until we, too, are mocked for being at best, on the outer fringes of the times! LoL.

[M]

When you’re young, you can’t imagine that you could ever be any other way. When I was an undergraduate, in a couple of the classes I took there was a girl who had worked for a corporation a few years then decided to go back to school. She was quite good looking and seemed to like me. My sister and I became friends of hers. She wasn’t a girl I would have approached, however. There was something worldly about her that was intimidating. I think she was in her late twenties. That seemed old.

“What the bean gas appears
to be undertaking,” Spock
said, looking through files,

“is the whoopee the
crew looks forward to making.
Look at them! All smiles.”

Uhura hadn’t
taken long to flirt with the
men of the bridge crew.

Yeoman Rand unzipped
her skirt so McCoy could have
a better view.

“I’ve reviewed the facts
of the universe from its
first explosions,”

said Spock, “to Klingons,
space spores, Gorns, and worse, those mind-
probing Talosians.”

“Is this,” snapped Kirk, “the
day we’ll rue, that bean gas should
be our undoing?”

“The conquered,” Spock watched
the gas-maddened crew, “starve while
endlessly screwing.”

Scott escaped from the
bridge, and, afraid of who might
approach him later,

tossed an old can of
Glade air freshener in the
ship’s ventilator.

Soon, the dusty bean
gas repelled, the crew happy
to still be alive,

Kirk smiled at Scott. “I
don’t think I’ve smelled that scent since
1965.”

[Guy]

RotFL! M, again so very clever and funny and sophisticated and risqué all at the same time! GR notifications failed to let me know.

It will take some time to respond! LMAO!

[Caitlan]

I don't rely on the GR notifications. I just check the group daily.

[M]

Next week on Star Dreck:
“Red alert, red alert,” Kirk
announced with distress.

“An Old Earth vessel,”
Spock smoothed his shirt. “Markings read
W.S.S.”

[M]

Edward rechecked his
calculations and Kat looked
on with calm gray eyes

as the crew went to
battle stations. “Prepare to
board the Enterprise!”

echoed along the
shining halls, but Alex yawned,
reclined on her bunk,

and ordered, “Hold my
incoming calls. I don’t feel
like collecting junk.”

M looked around. “We
mere three couldn’t conquer an
empty rondavel.

“Guy’s at a play, and
Stephanie is outlining
her seventh novel.”

[Christina]

How are you? I say
Fantastic! What about you?
absolutely great!

At night, the sun falls
as the moon comes out to sing
A wonderful noise

Do you hear that sound?
The one that sound like this Mooo
What do you call that?

I make Haikus up.
It ain't that hard, now you try!
there you go! You see!

Whispering Flowers
begin singing songs at night
A soft melody

[M]

Very nice, Christina! Written with ease. I have a feeling you’re going to fit right in.

Alex, you’ve got the rhyme down, and what a great installment! It may take me a minute to come up with a continuation.

[M]

“Putnam, we’re going
aboard for loot,” said M, who
slouched in, overworked.

“You hurt anyone,
I’ll give you the boot.” But Frank
stood and merely smirked.

“You may charge in there
like a lion,” Ajay warned,
“but let me clue you,

they have their wiles, those
Orion slave girls, and they
will do it to you.”

Frank smiled. “I, as did
Captain Pike, found out there was
not much not to like.”

[M]

“When she does that, it
drives me bonkers!” Frank banged
his head on the wall.

“Nothing but Yonkers
rhymes with bonkers,” said M. Frank
darted down the hall.

[Caitlan]

Did something get deleted?

This is freaking hilarious. I love it :D

[Caitlan]

:D Hey, it's better than what I can come up with XD

[M]

“That bonkers/Yonkers
combination,” quipped Edward,
“does it every time.”

“I’ve read cerebral
inflammation,” said Kat, “can
be caused by that rhyme,

especially used
on mad doctors, blue-eyed blondes,
and finals proctors.”

“Places!” CJ rubbed
his eyes, pushed buttons, slid the
controls. “Energize!”

. . .

They looked around. They
didn’t see Uhura or
Spock or Captain Kirk.

They weren’t at all
where they should be. Two fry cooks
busily at work

whistled. A waitress,
not amused, yelled at them, as
at subordinates.

Kat muttered, “CJ
must have used Old Earth’s Bertha’s
Grill coordinates.”

M sighed. “There’s just one
thing to do, stranded by an
accidental switch.”

He sat down, pulled out
a menu, and ordered fries
and a club sandwich.

Meanwhile, aboard the
W.S.S., after
sparks and a loud boom,

CJ tried to sweep
up the big mess in the smoke-
filled transporter room.

“I’ll soon command the
Enterprise.” Frank mixed Alex
a dry martini

and looked at her with
dangerous eyes and turned on
some old Mancini.

[Caitlan]

Brilliant, M :D

[M]

You’re too kind, Kat. I can’t believe I posted that dreck.

[Caitlan]

At least you can post XD I wouldn't know what to write about.

[M]

You’re beautiful, Kat. Just be yourself. That’s what poetry demands of you, and it’s why most people fail at it. You won’t fail at it, though. There are some extremely talented people in this group, and you’re one of them. Just post anything.

[M]

Maybe the thing to do is to get away from a TV series made in the 1960’s. Haiku is intended to be a momentary impression. It isn’t supposed to rhyme. It’s supposed to be one verse that’s self contained.

A half-full tumbler
on the counter by the phone
is the note she left.

[Guy]

Well put, M. Kat, I agree with M. You have a natural talent. Allow yourself to be exactly who you are, to express who you are. For some reason our society tends to fill the young with feelings of being somehow inadequate. To be young is to be inexperienced, only, not inadequate.

A poem too small
held all it could and the world
felt its heart racing.

[M]

An eerie, low breeze
and high, icy clouds told me
people were drowning.

[Ruthie]

i saw this thread many times, but did not have the courage to try.. so here is my first ever try at writing a haiku..

soft sighs of the wind
told tales of darkness and cold:
winter is coming

[M]

Very nice, Ruth Annalyn! I especially like the line “told tales of darkness and cold . . .”

[Ruthie]

thanks, M! i love all your pieces here.. :)

[Guy]

Excellent, Ruth Annalyn. Welcome to the Haiku world.


The sigh of winter
found the blossoms of late spring
under the blue moon.

[M]

Alex, I’m shocked! Simply shocked! Isn’t there more?

[Caitlan]

M wrote: "You’re beautiful, Kat. Just be yourself. That’s what poetry demands of you, and it’s why most people fail at it. You won’t fail at it, though. There are some extremely talented people in this group..."


Aww, thanks M. It means a lot, coming from you. Incidentally, I met this person who had synesthesia, and they said that the letter M, to them, was a sophisticated old lady. And it made me laugh.


Guy wrote: "Well put, M. Kat, I agree with M. You have a natural talent. Allow yourself to be exactly who you are, to express who you are. For some reason our society tends to fill the young with feelings of b..."

Thanks to you too, Guy :D

Al! There is a shocked expression on my face right now! I'm sure there's more. There's got to be more. If there isn't, I'll cry.

[M]

Nobody had better put sores on my captain! Frank, a sophisticated old lady is going to deal with you!