Question 6: Shadow vs. Person

[Ashley]

When Skippy is with Lori and (!) enters her room, “Skippy feels happy but strange, like a shadow that’s won some competition and been invited for one day to be an actual person and not just a fuzzy shape on the ground” (p. 363). What does this tell you about Skippy? Have you ever had a similar experience (that is, shadow vs. real person)?

[Meghan]

This quote makes me think that Skippy is almost a voyeur into his own life. He is so disoriented with reality and damaged by what life has handed/forced on him that even the most basic teenage rites of passage (girls) is foreign to him, scary, and easier to deal with from a distance. At the same time it says that Skippy is so damaged by his circumstances that he is unable to connect on a real level with others, even those he wants desperately to trust. The Shadow effect is a coping mechanism in a pure form.

I think we have all probably had a "shadow" moment or exp. I know I had my fair share during a particularly difficult year in college where everything felt out of control..almost as if I was a guest in my own life. It is a eerie feeling.

[Alisha]

Was Skippy on drugs at this time? I don't remember if that was stated or not, and I dont have the book with me....

Anyway, I tend to attribute experiences like these to the drug use, when there has been drug use...

Along with the heightened anxiety, excitement, uncertainty about what was happening, I understand this out of body experience Skippy had.

The only time I've felt that was in waking up after getting my wisdom teeth pulled....once again, drugs.

[Meghan]

he was not on drugs when it happened.

Drugs can explain a lot of instances of this shadow effect...but not all....no drug use here...just a eerie sense of being a passenger along for the ride instead of being the one in the driver's seat. so lack of control.

[Ashley]

I thought of Skippy as almost disembodied. Meg, I loved you're description. Having the weird little interlude with Lori allows him to actually PARTICIPATE. Which tells me poor Skippy is terribly disengaged with life around. The only person more "shadowy" than him is probably Lori, so it's interesting that she's the one who makes him feel real.

I think for me, the closest thing I can think of is post-baby haze. My maternity leave was an utter blur. I had a perpetual crick in my neck because I never looked up---I was always looking down at Charlotte for whatever reason. All of a sudden, Charlotte was the only thing that existed, and my job was simply to facilitate her existence, not actually engage with anything around me. I had this vague knowledge that the world was proceeding without me, with people not too afraid to go to public places (I had a bizarre terror of my baby crying in public--I've gotten over it). Besides, how engaged can you be with the world if you have to stop and go hide every 2 hours and sit around and nurse for 30 minutes? Anyway, that less-than-human, shadowy feeling is very unpleasant!

[Meghan]

Oh Ashers good example....that really describes what it feels like. Also I agree Lori is more shadowy than Skippy....that girl was soo tragic to me it was hard to read.

[Carol]

This section of the book, for a brief time was sort of sweet....then prior to that it was all I could do to read a page and try my hardest to turn it. This book was a challenge for me from the start to the end. There were some times of reprieve where normalcy took over, but I will never refer the book, nor read it again. I didn't have a lot of time to get it finished, so I crunched on the days and times when I could. Maybe that was good, because it forced me to do it....or I NEVER WOULD HAVE FINISHED! No reflection on any others either.