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Chatting with Christopher Koehler
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Dreamspinner
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Apr 09, 2011 06:02AM

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Yep, although their flight kept getting earlier and earlier. I ended up dashing to the airport. But then my son yakked my ear off for an hour and a half straight. Endearing, but also kind of painful.

Hi, Amy, and welcome. I'll start posting things in a minute or two.

But I’m Christopher Koehler, and thanks for stopping my today. I know some of you know me IRL, some of you know me from Facebook, and some may not know me at all. So just bear with me if some of this is old news.
I started writing when I was a kid, even before I was literate, I suppose. My parents tell stories of me filling spiral-bound notebooks with “writing” that was in fact just scribbles. Or maybe that was just a way to get my teachers off my back. I attended an “alternative” private school and I’m sure they were all about emoting. Whatevs.
When I was in high school and college I filled the margins of my notebooks with what would now be called plot bunnies, little fragments of ideas for stories or characters or situations. At some point in time, I decided to start carrying a designated notebook for such things, pretty much at all times. This was pre-notebook computer days, of course. I remember the first “portable” Macs. Ug. Spiral notebooks were cheaper, lighter, and easier to use. They were probably faster, too…
Now I just jot such things into my iPhone and email to myself. Sometimes, it really is better nowadays. If I ever start to romanticize the past, someone be a lamb and shoot me, yeah?
Anyway, another strand of my life that’s led me here today was reading that Katherine Kurtz, author of the Deryni Chronicles, got the idea that became Deryni Rising from a dream. I have fairly vivid dreams and I took to writing them down in grad school. One of these years, they’ll show up in print, but it taught me the value of writing it down when it occurred to me. I’ve gotten out of the shower, gotten out of bed in the middle of the night, and pulled over in traffic to deal with plot bunnies. I suspect everyone who does something creative even as a hobby has done something similar.
So in my adult life, I’ve been a janitor, a bottle washer in a lab, a temp, an adjunct instructor of history, and an editor. The whole time, I kept working on ideas and writing, writing, writing. I wish I could say all those different things came together to make me the man and writing I am today, but mostly all they did was cement in my mind the conviction that hell is other people and jobs are for chumps. I much prefer to write.
So that’s the thumbnail sketch of my life as a writer. Frankly, I tend to freeze up when asked to introduce myself, so if there’s something you want to know, ask and I’m sure that’ll get the overshare flowing.

That happens to me when my husband gets home from his work trips. I'm so glad to have him home, but sometime in the first hour, I always want to put a gag on him (and not in a kinky way, either).

That happens to me when my husband gets home from his work trips. I'm so glad to have him home, but sometime in the first..."
This is why my family goes straight for television/computers to decompress. We don't want to piss each other off!!!

That happens to me when my husband gets home from his work trips. I'm so glad to have him home, but sometime in the first..."
I wanted to gag my son. Or stab myself in the ear with an ice pick. But then the DH got going. Without getting too specific, let's just say he comes from a part of the country with a pronounced regional accept. He's lost his, but hearing it now is apparently like fingernails on a blackboard and he had to tell me all about it.


That happens to me when my husband gets home from his work trips. I'm so glad to have him home, but sometim..."
I just think it's funny. Mostly it seems to be one-syllable words that are pronounced as two (or more). But he grew up there, so I'm not sure why he's surprised.

Exactly. It's a steel-cage match, me vs. Goodreads.

Howdy y'all.
Stacia"
Howdy howdy! So what do you want to talk about?

Howdy y'all.
Stacia"
Howdy howdy! So what do you want to talk about?"
Aren't we here to talk about your book, Rocking the Boat? Ok so I'll start. It needs a sequel!..LOL Yes I know work in progress. Everyone needs to read this book. You actually managed to teach me something.

Howdy y'all.
Stacia"
Howdy howdy! So what do you want to talk about?"
Aren't we here to talk about your ..."
Hehe! Yeah, I guess this is all about meeeee, isn't it?
And yes, there is a sequel and it is in the hands of my beta readers at this very instant. My husband's about half done with Tipping the Balance, and so far has mostly found all the places I've dropped words and reversed characters' names. I honestly wonder why I bother trying to edit my own work.

Hi, Eden,
I think I can manage that. There'll be a contest later to win a free e-copy too.
Excerpt to follow.

“SO HOW’RE things going?” Drew asked, sucking a smoothie through a straw with the same technique he used on men to turn their skeletons to jelly.
Nick and Drew strolled along on a pleasant spring Saturday afternoon, soaking up the sun and culture both at an outdoor arts festival.
“The crew’s doing really well. They had a regatta last weekend—”
“If that’s what I’d asked, I’m sure I’d find that really fascinating, but I didn’t, so I don’t. I asked how things—as in you, as in that rower—were going,” Drew said, peering over his sunglasses at his friend.
Nick’s shoulders slumped, and he searched for just the rights words. “It’s complicated.”
“Never mind, babydoll. If you have to parse it, that pretty much answers the question,” Drew sighed.
“What do you want me to say? You asked how I am. I’m Morganless,” Nick said, shrugging.
“You’ve really got it bad. At least four guys have checked you out since we got here a half-hour ago,” Drew said.
“Really?” Nick asked without much interest.
“Really. So tell me, whatever happened after you so rudely dragged me from the bar after he saw you? I’ve been dying to know,” Drew said.
“Just not badly enough to ask?” Nick said, smiling for the first time that afternoon.
Drew gripped his shoulder. “Nick, if you’d wanted me to know, you’d have told me. But truthfully? The curiosity’s killing me.”
“There’s nothing to tell. The next day, I talked to him, told him I was just there with a friend, that—”
“You didn’t,” Drew said. “You told him you’re straight?”
“I might’ve,” Nick mumbled, staring at the ground.
Drew shook his head. “Unless this boy’s a total fool, there’s no way he’s going to believe you’re straight, and if he were a total fool, you wouldn’t be pitching a trouser tent over him.”
“What a thing to say. You should be ashamed,” Nick said.
“Oh no you don’t, you don’t get out of this so easily. I can’t believe you told him you were straight—”
“You don’t understand,” Nick said.
“I understand a lot more than you give me credit for,” Drew snapped, “and don’t whine. It’s unbecoming.”
“I wasn’t whining,” Nick mumbled. Drew was right about one thing. His whole obsession with Morgan really was unbecoming. It was why he’d lied in the first place, and it clearly hadn’t worked. The back- and-forth staring? That had to stop. It distracted them both from what was important. It was unprofessional of him, just like Morgan’s games were beneath him, and jeez, he wanted Morgan beneath him.
Nick smacked his forehead. That had to stop. Since this couldn’t end the way he wanted it to, with Morgan in his life and in his bed, he had to end it another way. He had to make sure Morgan was unavailable, and that meant getting Morgan off the market. If Morgan were dating someone Nick loved and cared about, then it wouldn’t matter how badly he wanted him. He looked at Drew speculatively.
“Drew....”
“Whatever it is, no.”
“I’ve got an idea,” Nick said, more animated than he’d been all day.
“No.”
“You could at least hear me out.”
Drew shook his head. “I recognize that tone. The last time you used it....” He shuddered. “Just, no.”
“C’mon, hear me out,” Nick wheedled. “If you dated Morgan, then I’d have to get over him, wouldn’t I?”
“Oh, jeez, it’s worse than I thought. Where do you come up with this shit? Do you find it online, or is it something you store in a box under your bed until it’s good and rancid?” Drew shot Nick a dirty look.
Nick put his arm around Drew’s shoulder and led him to a bench in the shade of an old oak tree. “Seriously, give it a listen. I’m not asking you to marry him, just distract him for a while so I can get my head together. You’re a great guy,” Nick wheedled. “You’ll be kind to him. I’ve never known you to be cruel to anyone, and you’ve always let your exes down gently.”
Drew nodded despite himself. “Go on.”
“All you have to do is date him for a while, show him a good time—without messing up my training plan—and then let him down easy, just like you always do with men when you’re done with them.”

Exactly. It's a steel-cage match, me vs. Goodreads."
I am betting on Goodreads for the win. Otherwise you will be stripped of your super power.

Exactly. It's a steel-cage match, me vs. Goodre..."
Yeah, I really hope I don't kill this one off. So far, so good. I'd gotten myself all worked up about the FB thingy. Then it didn't work and I emailed and texted DSP's social-media boffin, panicked. Then it didn't work some more and then vanished entirely. FB still hasn't gotten back to her, either. Rude!

Yes, actually I do. In fact just this morning I had some ideas on a book I set aside a few years back, an homage to Jane Austen and Pride and Prejudice, one of my favorite books of all time. At one point, my life closely resembled a gay version of a Jane Austen novel, and I thought I'd write one. Pretty arrogant in retrospect, but I still think it can be dusted off and rewritten/retold as a m/m romance.
Christopher wrote: "OK, so here's the introductory post I prepared for my last meet-the-author, back before I murdered--in cold blood, no less--Dreamspinner's FB page.
But I’m Christopher Koehler, and thanks for stop..."
Hi, Christopher- so what's this rowing thing?
But I’m Christopher Koehler, and thanks for stop..."
Hi, Christopher- so what's this rowing thing?

But I’m Christopher Koehle..."
So how much of an answer are you looking for? Because I could go on for hours and hours.

Jane is my all time favorite author. I even read...wait..this about you, not me. Please continue.

[snort!] I'm not sure people much appreciate Miss Austen these days. They see a world, frankly tedious-looking at times, of parties and speculation, but they forget that the stakes were deadly serious and that the people she detailed essentially lived in a shark tank, and any perceived weakness was fatal.

Those were some seriously scary times, especially if you were a woman. One wrong move, one teeny tiny breath of scandal and you were done. As in ruined for life. For real.


That's it exactly, and not just ruin for them, for their families as well, as with Kitty's (I think it was her) running off with the rake Mr. Wickham. She ruined not only her own life, which she never recognized, but also the prospects of her sisters. The most they could've hoped for would be employment as governesses, not a very comfortable or easy existence in a class-stratified society like Regency England.


I definitely write when my son's in school. I've pretty much stopped pretending to do much in the way of household maintenance--yard, cleaning, etc. It gets ignored or hired out. And my son goes to daycare three days a week after school, and that's worked out very well for both of us. Not only do I get more time to myself to write but since he's extremely outgoing and social, he's around people, including several other boys from the neighborhood.
But I also write any time I can steal a few minutes. Ideas hit when they hit, and sometimes five minutes jotting down a bare-bones outline gets me pages and pages when I later have time to flesh the notes out. Then, too, when I'm away from my computer, I can still write notes to myself on my phone.

And I doubt I'll ever look at a smoothie the same way again.
Sorry to be late.
Elizabeth

“All you have to do is date him for a while, show him a good time—without messing up my training plan—and then let him down easy, just like you always do with men when you’re done with them.”<<
Enjoyed the excerpt. Silly boys. This sounds like a recipe for disaster. Accident waiting to happen? Some mighty good reading!

And I doubt I'll ever look at a smoothie the same way again.
So..."
I know! An hour and a half into and we're still up and running. Ariel's going to be so surprised.

“All you have to do is date him for a while, show him a good time—without messing up my training plan—and then let him down easy, just like you always do wi..."
Disaster waiting to happen, yep. One of my betas suggested that particular scene. It was fun to write.

Yes, actually I do. In fact just this morning I had some ideas on a book I set aside a few years back, an homage to Jane..."
That sounds fascinating, not arrogant. Just refrain yourself from adding in zombies, sea monsters or Godzilla.


It'll be the next summer blockbuster...just as soon as you get on that, Phoenix. ;-)

I have no idea why, but for some reason I'm reminded of one of my favorite lines from the movie 'Soap Dish'
I believe Whoopi gets to deliver it.
'Actors don't like playing coma. They say it limits the range.'
Maybe it applies to zombies too, I dunno.

(so ashamed)

Don't be ashamed. That's hardly the worst popcult sin. I'm told it's really funny, I just haven't read it yet. I've got probably--and no exaggeration--a good 30-50 books waiting for my attention, and those are just the actual physical books, not electronic ones. I'm not sure when all this reading is supposed to happen, mind you. Maybe when the kid leaves for college or reform school?

Nothing wrong with being detail-oriented.