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Random Queries > Please help.. how can I get over my cat? In tears...

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message 1: by [deleted user] (new)

That was spooky. When I opened this thread I swear I could hear a cat meow.


message 2: by [deleted user] (new)

I'm so sorry, Dutch.
I was really attached to my kitten and had her for two years before she ran away. I was 11, so I didn't really notice the fact that my dad got another one that looked just like it, but when I did find out a year later, I was pretty upset.
One day, you'll think about him and smile, not cry :)


message 3: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17373 comments Mod
I lost my cat of ten years last spring. It was hard. I still think about him every day.


Jackie "the Librarian" | 8991 comments I'm so sorry, Dutch. I just lost a cat, too, and even though Spooky was at least eighteen years old (he was an adult when he came to me), I still wish he could have lived longer.

All I can suggest is celebrate his life. Do something in his memory, a little ritual that means something to you.


message 5: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) It gets better, Dutch. It does.


message 6: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Dutch, it does get better! It's been almost two years since I lost my heartdog and about seven months since I lost my other dog, and mostly when I think of them, I smile. Sometimes I feel as if they're still here with me, just out of my sight.

It's okay to cry--grieving doesn't have a schedule.


message 7: by Lori (new)

Lori Been about 30 years now since I lost my Poosie. My dear dear Poosie. Saying that name makes my eyes mist up. She was 20. I had had her through all the turmoil of tween, teen, and up. She was my heart and soul. But you know what? My eyes have dried up and I'm smiling. In memory of Poosie. I miss you, and boy am I glad you came in my life. My Poosie.

So yes. It gets better. But oh how it hurts, it hurts and hurts, such a hole in the heart. Every day it gets better, as your wonderful memories outweigh the pain.


message 8: by Jim (new)

Jim | 6484 comments Time will help Dutch, but maybe a new kitten would help too.


message 9: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 24778 comments Mod
It was a recent loss, so I think you're okay still crying. I agree with Jim, get a new kitty cat and you'll start to feel better.

I still think of my deceased cats who left the earth years ago. I have so many fond memories of them, and regrets the way one of them died (she disappeared in a big rainstorm and we never saw her again). So I don't even really know how she died. She was such a gentle spirit. The other one was feistier, and died of old age so I don't feel as bad about her death.


message 10: by Lori (new)

Lori Poosie was my angel, no joke, she was there when I needed her to help me through my crazies! And yes, part dog in her affection and devotion, and part guardian spirit!

Yeah. I can't really listen to Unchained Memory without remembering her, because that totally captured my pain.

Oh, my love, my darling,
I've hungered for your touch, a long lonely time.
And time goes by so slowly, and time can do so much.
Are you still mine?
I need your love. I need your love.
Godspeed your love to me.

Now you'll carry him inside the rest of your life. And he'll make you smile and feel comfort.


message 11: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 24778 comments Mod
Are you artistic? Paint Steve's portrait. Or needlepoint him onto a pillow, if you're crafty. Or take his photo and have it turned into a jigsaw puzzle. Have it put onto a mug.


message 12: by Lori (new)

Lori Poosie slept curled in my torso as we spooned.


message 13: by [deleted user] (new)

Dutch, what's killing me right now is that your Steve looks EXACTLY like my Tuxedo. Wow.

I too would like to express my condolences on your cat's passing. When I had to put my first cat down, 8 years ago, it was simply the worst thing I'd ever experienced until then.


message 14: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17373 comments Mod
Humo slept in the crook of my arm. He loved to get under the covers and cuddle while I read.


message 15: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) The night my Minnie passed on (6 years ago), she came up on the bed close to my face as she had done so many times, and purred like crazy.


message 16: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Dutch, LG reminded me of the mugs and urns my friend Megan made for my dogs. Megan is a potter who does absolutely incredible custom work. Her Etsy shop is here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/kogijiki and I can't praise her enough. If you've got some spare cash, order a mug, send in some pics, and get something you can use every day and think about Steve.


message 17: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Yup.


message 18: by Lori (new)

Lori The day Poosie died I was racing around late for work, and she kept coming up to me seeking what I now know was a goodbye, but I couldn't give that to her, and that destroyed me, major GUILT. But a week later, I SWEAR, she appeared. I saw something out of the corner of my eye, and there she was, sitting in the middle of the floor. I got so spooked, and then she was gone. I know she came back so I could see her one last time since I had ignored her the morning of her death.


message 19: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Oh man I gotta stay away from this thread.


message 20: by [deleted user] (new)

I'm missing Kit now.


message 21: by ms.petra (new)

ms.petra (mspetra) I'm so sorry, Dutch. Everything has already been said. Honor his memory and allow some time to pass. It will get better. HUGS!


message 22: by Rachel (new)

Rachel | 1106 comments I'm so sorry, Dutch. I've lost many tears over my beloved quiet companions, too, and while it will hurt for a little while, remember all the fond memories of them from time to time, think of everything special about them, and why there'll never another just like them, things will be better.


message 23: by Phil (new)

Phil | 11837 comments I'm sorry for your loss, Dutch. My own kitty of 21 years, Bonk, died last year. Like you, our whole family was in the room when the doctor gave the injection, and we were petting him as he closed his eyes. It helped me to talk about him with others who knew him.


message 24: by Heidi (new)

Heidi (heidihooo) | 10825 comments Dutch, I'm so sad to read about your loss. I can't even imagine... and don't wanna go there. I'm scritching Robby's belly right now and giving him hugs. I like Jackie's suggestion and think you should set an evening aside to have a memorial celebration in your cat's honor.

I know it's NOT the same, but when my friend's 4 year old nephew died, I worked myself into a frenzy trying to figure out how I could get to the funeral. It was near impossible for me. I talked with my coworker, a therapist. She suggested I have my own memorial in his honor... so I did. I spent several days planning it, even typing up an agenda for the evening. That Friday afternoon while the actual service was going on, I spent the 3 hours in prayer and meditation, visualizing sending his family light and love and emotional support and thinking about him smiling and comforting everyone. It was a difficult exercise for me. I did all this from my apartment and Robby interrupted my meditative state several times to "greet" the neighbors with hearty barks and talking. After the 3 hours I alloted for them that afternoon, I watched his favorite movie... something I had never seen - Wild Hogs (he was scheduled to meet Tim Allen that Wednesday through the Make-A-Wish foundation). Making a scheduled plan to honor his memory did me a world of good. I still cried some after my memorial for him, but it gave me a channel for appropriate and unadulterated private grieving and in a way, it was hugely cathartic for me.


message 25: by janine (new)

janine | 7709 comments i'm so sorry about your loss, dutch. steve looks like a wonderful cat. i think heidi's idea is great, do something in steve's memory. a cathartic experience will probably make you feel better.


message 26: by Janice (new)

Janice (jamasc) I'm so sorry about your Steve, Dutch. You are grieving and that is natural. I like LG's suggestion - especially the picture on a mug.


message 27: by Michael (new)

Michael I'm sorry, Dutch, and I wish I had more to say other than I'm sorry. I don't know if this is a help or not, but I hope it helps.

http://rainbowsbridge.com/poem.htm


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