Thoughts?

[Cyndi]

I am very conflicted about this book. I can't decide if the author is a genious or an idealistic whack-job. It's entirely possible that his theory is the ultimate in emotional evolution. It's also entirely possible that he has severely over-simplified human emotions and behaviors. Or maybe, I'm just not ready to accept it because of my own emotions and behaviors.

The basic premise that the world would be a much better place if everyone felt unconditional love and that defense mechanisms we use contribute to our own unhappiness is not debatable.

My problem with the book began when the author stated that anger is bad and wrong. He is coming from a point of view that anything that is not loving is bad and wrong. However, as someone who has recently realized how out of touch I have been with my own needs and emotions, and how much of a doormat I have been, it is very difficult for me to read that anger, or any other emotion, is wrong. Of course, as adults, we have to control how we express our negative emotions, but having those emotions is not wrong.

While I definitely gained some more insight into why people behave the way they do, and I will absolutely attempt to put many of his solutions into practice, I will probably need to re-read this book in another year or so to figure out if I feel any differently about it.

Anyone feel the same way?

[Inge]

Hi Cindy,

I have been practicing the Real Love principles four about 4 years now, and yes - it does not come naturally to most of us: keeping my mouth shut when I'm angry and not spewing out what I'm dying to say. But it's been an amazing journey, and the changes in my life have been amazing. I'm no longer the angry, impatient mother that I was a few years ago. I'm much calmer and happier, and I have hope in my life! I understand that many of my behaviors were based in fear. I am much LESS of a doormat now than I used to be! I am learning to say "no" - but not in anger or fear. Just straight "no". The Real Love principles are very much in line with Buddhist principles and with Eckhart Tolle's and Byron Katie's work. We have a group that meets once a week where we share and look at our behaviors and what we can do differently.

Keep practicing!
Cheers,
Inge

[Rachel]

Cyndi,

I completely agree with you. Parts of the book I really enjoyed and thought helped open my eyes and other parts I thought he was not realistic.

I am also really torn because I think the overall message pretty good.

Rachel

[Frida123]

I spent over $5000 to visit the author. He does not practice his own principles. Simply asking a question will get you thrown out the door. I loved the books, but the man has hurt me and my family financially. He really hurt our spirit, our will to keep going, and my telling the truth about this experience has cost me my local support group. He is dangerous.

[Frida123]

Cyndi wrote: "I am very conflicted about this book. I can't decide if the author is a genious or an idealistic whack-job. It's entirely possible that his theory is the ultimate in emotional evolution. It's al..."

I spent a lot of money to visit the author... although he has some good ideas, he is definitely a quack.