The Mystery, Crime, and Thriller Group discussion
Fun & Games
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Five Word Build-a-Story
"This looks like the work of that undercover gang, the TWIN CLUB. They cause my HEMORRHOIDS to act up every time I think of them" groaned Aard, holding his bum. "Looks like you're in their STRIKE ZONE, buddy" laughed Yerbusted, who released Aard to continue his journey to cooking school. Yerbusted had other fish to fry as he had found a bloody red wagon, some SPARKLY GLITTER and a SOMBRERO down by the Scarlet Letter club.
1. American Pickers2. Velocipede
3. Ignition key
4. Pig's knuckle
5. Slim Whitman 8 track tape
Grabbing his VELOCIPEDE and a SLIM WHITMAN 8 TRACK TAPE, Aard gingerly sat on the seat and turned his IGNITION KEY, only to be accosted by a group of AMERICAN PICKERs of dubious membership as they reached out to help themselves to his nasal contents. Aard quickly swung his PIG'S KNUCKLE for his class project to clear them away from his face and gunned his engine and popped a wheelie right over them.
1. Gout2. RevJim
3. Tooth Fairy
4. Cavity
5. Milk
In the meantime, fighting a bad case of GOUT flare-up and a toothache, the REV. JIM was struggling toward town after cleaning out all the participants in the hearse poker game. Lo and behold, the TOOTH FAIRY who had just finished her rounds, appeared, mugged him, and left with a warning: "That toothache is the result of a large CAVITY in your MILK teeth and I would suggest that you get it taken care of immediately"
1. Money2. Forceps
3. Murder
4. Wings
5. Dried flowers
"Hey wait," cried RevJim, "you're the danged tooth fairy, use your FORCEPS, pull this tooth and gimme my MONEY plus your money for the tooth! Sheesh!" Toothie fluttered her WINGS at the good Rev, told him to smoke some more DRIED FLOWER petals, and flew off saying that she'd have to MURDER the Rev in order to recoup all the money if he was going to make her work for his bundle.
1. Pocket lint2. Toe jam
3. Sing-a-long
4. Tai-bo
5. Cognac
Left with nothing in his pocket but POCKET LINT, the Rev kept walking to town even though his gout pain was now compounded by a case of TOE JAM. As he passed the Scarlet Letter club, which was also hosting a community SING-A-LONG and a TAI-BO class, he decided to go and try to get a free COGNAC. He was shocked when he entered to spot an old enemy from his carnival days.
1. Mask2. Kindle
3. Thermos
4. Band-aid
5. Pawn shop
Sporting a MASK and a Hello Kitty BAND-AID, Ellie Funt-Doody was perched on a bar stool skimming the PAWN SHOP ads with her KINDLE and Starbux THERMOS in front of her.
1. Ferocious Felines2. Pudding snack pack
3. The Flugs
4. Happy Meal
5. Eye dropper
Wishing that the crime fighting FEROCIOUS FELINES he had met at the poker game were there to watch his back, Rev Jim grabbed a PUDDING SNACK PACK from a nearby table. "I thought you were still with THE FLUGS," he said to Ellie cautiously. The last time he had seen her, she had tried to force a HAPPY MEAL down his throat with an EYE DROPPER and he wasn't taking any chances.
1. Shovel2. Kittens
3. White-out
4. Feather duster
5. Sled
Little did RevJim know that the felines were just around the corner with their bag of magic tricks in tow. One look at Ellie and LBD took out the WHITE-OUT for the Hello Kitty band-aid which was insulting to the KITTENS. Smudge took out the SHOVEL for fear that the output of Ellie Funt-Doody might become overwhelming. Yoda-San took out the SLED and the FEATHER DUSTER, thinking that tickling Ellie's nose could provide enough wind power to give them all a ride on the sled.
1. GOODREADS.COM2. Nook
3. Quad macchiato
4. Tiara
5. Texas Hold 'Em
Ellie had quit her job at the circus and was now one of those members of GOODREADS.COM who were controlling the lives of those in Toontown. She was unaware that the felines were stalking her as she sat in the NOOK of the Scarlet Letter with a cup of QUAD MACCHIATO in her hand and TIARA on her head. "Haven't seen you, Rev Jim, since your days of cheating at TEXAS HOLD 'EM at the World Series of Poker", she laughed.
1. Bum's rush2. National Geographic
3. Silver polish
4. Safety deposit box
5. Nobel Prize
"Heard the NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC exposed your ploy to get the NOBEL PRIZE using SILVER POLISH to cure cancer, Ellie," snorted the good Rev, "Guess your SAFETY DEPOSIT BOX is empty now, eh?". "On a more serious note, what's that you're reading on your Kindle, GM Ford's 'BUM'S RUSH'?" the Rev queried, always interested to know what others are reading.
1. Scales2. Ringmaster
3. Canasta
4. Microwave
5. Hot fudge sundae
"The SCALES have fallen from my eyes as my British friends would say" retorted Ellie who wistfully conjured up visions of her love affair with the RINGMASTER who she met at a CANASTA GAME. But Rev Jim was not being attentive since he was wondering why the MICROWAVE on the bar had melted his HOT FUDGE SUNDAE. "Don't you want to know the title of my Kindle book?" asked Ellie.
1. Brain2. Ruckus
3. Horse whip
4. Old Dutch Cleanser
5. Cellophane
"Barkeep, do you not have a BRAIN, why did you just sprinkle OLD DUTCH CLEANSER on my hot fudge sundae and wrap it in CELLOPHANE? I want my money back!" cried the Rev as the club doors swung open with a crash and a bow-legged dude dressed in Hefty bags and carrying a HORSE WHIP entered, causing a great RUCKUS.
1. Lycra2. ABBA
3. The Bobs
4. Pip
5. Reunion
It was Bjorn from ABBA trying out a new persona which differed from his old days when he guested with THE BOBS and as a PIP with Gladys Knight. "I'm looking for Lynda LYCRAthighs, Gene Simmons and the rest of that great bunch of folks over on Bowling Lane for a REUNION" cried Bjorn, staring at the cleanser covered hot fudge sundae with interest.
1. Morgue2. Exercise bike
3. Playboy
4. Baton
5. Baggies
Linda Lycrathighs Was in the MORGUE on the stainless steel table was the remains of a well-known PLAYBOY called Thomas the Tank he had been in an accident with a EXERCISE BIKE admittedly the bike had been strapped to a pre-owned lime green limo. the police had been called in to to examine the contents of Thomas's stomach which had contained a number of BAGGIES and interestingly the remains of a police BATON in his pocket
1 TARTAN HOLDALL.2 CINNAMON
3 DONALD DUCK
4 ERASURE
5 ANNIE LENNOX
Bjorn, who had no idea that Lynda Lycrathighs was deceased, reached in his TARTAN HOLDALL for a hankie to wipe his tears and held on to his DONALD DUCK doll for consolation. "I remember when she and Gene used to share CINNAMON rolls, cooked over a BRAZIER while listening to ANNIE LENNOX" he sobbed. "Get a grip, you wimp" snapped Ellie, "you know how people in Toontown seem to recover, even from death".
1. Lipstick2. Microphone
3. Nylon stockings
4. Sheet music
5. Skillet
Morty, the ME, spoke into the morgue MICROPHONE, taking stock of old Lynda's appearance and belongings, "LIPSTICK - lime green in color, but smells like watermelon; NYLON STOCKINGS - worn over lycra tights, red lace fish net in pattern, torn in several places; SHEET MUSIC for "Chiquitita" stuffed into each ear; cast iron SKILLET secured to body over stomach area - guess we'll have to re-weigh her minus the skillet!"
1. Curly hair2. Aerobic shoes
3. Simmons Family
4. Fruit loops
5. Sneeze
"She certainly had beautiful CURLY HAIR" observed Morty "but I'm not particularly impressed with the AEROBIC SHOES". "Wasn't she involved in the SIMMONS FAMILY scandal several stories back....or was it the Chef Lardeau FRUIT LOOPS murder?" inquired Art the Assistant. At that point, Lynda sat up with a SNEEZE and Morty and Art fainted.
1. Bucket of water2. Good Housekeeping cookbook
3. Auto parts store
4. Scissors
5. Pawn shop
Lynda climbed off the stainless steel table and tossed a BUCKET OF WATER on Morty & Arty, narrowly missing stabbing them with a pair of SCISSORS that fell off one of the trays. She thought it looked like a PAWN SHOP instead of an autopsy room, noting an open GOOD HOUSEKEEPING COOKBOOK turned to a meatloaf recipe and an AUTO PART STORE girlie calendar, along with a tray of rings, watches, earrings and nose rings, right next to the tray of what appeared to be saved tattoo'd skin.
1. Resurrection2. Telepathy
3. Passion fruit
4. Quesadillas
5. Cracker Jacks
RESURRECTION is not uncommon here in Toontown" Linda explained to Mort and Arty...."nor for that matter is TELEPATHY" which she demonstrated by ordering two PASSION FRUIT QUESADILLAS from Toontown Tainted Tacos without speaking. "You are a regular CRACKER JACK" cried the morgue attendants..."and we will follow you anywhere".
1. Bus2. Fanny pack
3. The Scarlet Letter
4. Gin Rummy
5. Pulpit
"Okay, boys, as they sang, let's get on the BUS, Gus!", said Lynda, snagging a FANNY PACK and deck of cards for GIN RUMMY on the bus. "We're off to the PULPIT of RevJim, which happens to be at THE SCARLET LETTER Club on Wednesdays!".
1. Garfunkle2. Tara
3. Audiologist
4. Proctologist
5. Hokey-pokey
Arriving at the Letter, they were horrified to find that Art GARFUNKLE was making a guest appearance. The Rev was sitting with his AUDIOLOGIST buddy,Al Ears, who was once an unlicensed PROCTOLOGIST using the alias of Barry Butts, reading Gone With The Wind and wishing he was back at TARA again. "I thought the HOKEY-POKEY contest was tonight" said a disappointed Lynda.
1. Dancing Queen2. Circus ticket
3. Juggler
4. Saturday Night Fever
5. James Cagney
The emcee for the night was a JAMES CAGNEY impersonator that used to be a JUGGLER and CIRCUS TICKET taker in a previous life. He sang "If I can't have you....oops, no wait, that's from SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER, over in the ABC story, wrong game...You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your liiiiifeee....See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the DANCING QUEEN...."
1. Metallica2. Jan and Dean
3. Arson
4. Theft
5. Dead body
"I used to be a METALLICA fan until I got turned on to JAN AND DEAN's Deadman's Curve" mused Lynda. "But after the ARSON in my apartment, the THEFT of my teen idol record collection and my terrible experience as a DEAD BODY, I have lost my rhythm. So why does Dancing Queen bring back a feeling of deja vu?"
1. Bjorn2. New Zealand
3. Barbells
4. Chef Alton
5. Formaldehyde
"Ah yes," reminisced Lynda, "before my trip to NEW ZEALAND, I was lifting BARBELLS at Gold's with my coach BJORN, whose name reminded me of ABBA and therefore Dancing Queen. CHEF ALTON of the Gold's Cafeteria had told me in passing that ABBA's Bjorn was preserved in FORMALDEHYDE.....or was that the food....hmmmmm....maybe it's my brain....sounds like a crime that needs to be solved!"
1. Naugahyde2. Pitty & Pat
3. Rollercoaster
4. Fog machine
5. Crescent rolls
"To tell you the truth, I believe that Bjorn was killed in an accident with a NAUGAHYDE recliner at PITTY AND PAT LePetomaine's apartment" offered the James Cagney impersonator, whose career had been a ROLLERCOASTER ride of ups and downs. "Oh well" sighed Lynda, "just turn on the FOG MACHINE, bring on the dancers, and we'll have a snack of CRESCENT ROLLS before we challenge Ellie Fant-Dooty about her Nobel Prize scam.
2. Hemorrhoid
3. Strike zone
4. Sparkly glitter
5. Sombrero