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Congratulations, Claire! Do not worry about the first school. Do what feels right for *you*!
Kathleen wrote: "Congratulations, Claire! Do not worry about the first school. Do what feels right for *you*!"Thank you! I'm actually going to visit NC State this week. Everyone in math and academia I've solicited for advice has unilaterally said NC State is the better bet. As long as I like the people, I see no reason not to go. :)
Good. I look forward to hearing more.
Congrats and Good luck Claire!I wanted to share a funny ad they are showing on tv...but couldn't find the short version of the vampire part of the ad, but I found a 2 minutes version :)
The vamp part says this :
"Wonder if I,
gave an oreo,
to a vampire,
from a creepy show
would he not act so undead,
would he thirst for milk instead
I just got this feeling that it might work out alright"
here is the link to the video, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TO000...
Hahaha, that's so cute! :D That was definitely Cassie and Mircea dancing towards the end LMAO!Thanks for sharing, Missdevora.
So adorable! An instant classic, I think.
Hi guys! I've been in Italy for the past 10 days so I stayed off GR because I think we all know how horrible the mobile version is.Happy (belated) first day of summer!
Happy belated Solstice to you too! Hope you had fun in Italy. :)
Hi Guys!!! It has been so so long... So... I got married end of 2014. The marriage itself was absolutely amazing (some of you have seen the pics on FB) but the stuff after.. not so much.
I do not make a good 'obedient' anything and frankly, by my husband's family's standards, apparently I make a 'terrible daughter in law.' That caused a huge lot of issues coz, well, I am not gonna be a maid for anybody, especially if they think its their due.
Around a year down the line I decided that I was not gonna bend over backwards for anyone anymore, especially as I still seemed to be 'not good enough'. I mean why bother right... if they're still gonna try and ruin my relationship anyways, at least if I stop trying, all they can say anymore is that I do not visit them and don't talk to them much. Better than them spinning around my every word and action into something else.
So it has taken a while but I have carved out my own space out of everything around me. I am what I am, and if people have a problem with it, that is their issue. Thankfully, my husband also understands that.
I started having chronic migraines and went into depression but meds have helped a lot with both. I am more or less back to normal now. It has been one hell of a time, but I do think I came out stronger on the other side.
Lots of other stuff also happened. There were plenty of good times, but this kinda overshadowed everything, which I should not have allowed.
Anyway, that was a summation of the last two years.
And this was not supposed to be a rant, or venting of any sort, but I cannot help it. I think of most of you as really good friends and I am sorry I vanished without so much as a word. And I know I am oversharing a bit, and I hope its okay.
I started working at Hachette India this July. It is absolutely amazing. I loved editing and I love reading books before they come out. Working full-time vs freelancing has also helped me a lot.
It is amazing to work in publishing full-time. I also got to learn and understand just why it takes so long to get books out.
Now I am more or less back to myself. And I am back here. God how much I have missed being on Goodreads.
xoxo
Sorry to hear about your in-laws. I was lucky, though it sounds morbid, to not have in-laws. I mean ... my ex's family drove me barmy with just them. I don't think I could have handled more, lol. To tell the truth I still haven't divorced my husband and we've been seperated longer than we've been married. I keep saying why bother since I'm not looking to date or get married anytime soon. I'm afraid that I will turn out to be a spinster, but one that married before, too bad I can't collect cats.It is so cool that you were able to work things out and I hope that things get better for you on that front and your husband stays supportive.
That sounds so interesting on the job front. I was day dreaming about doing editing or possibly some transcribing, but I hadn't researched it in depth enough to start. It is kinda like I already don't think I can do it so why bother to look? Yes, I have issues. A lot of my troubles are transportation since I live in the boonies with no public transportation. sheesh
I've missed people posting in the group for a while, though I lurk and read other posts made here. In regards to changes for me, well attitude adjustment to the max for one thing. I actually got over my hesitance to ask for help outside my family to do and go places. So for like the past several months me and my friend Tiffiny go to the grocery store every Friday, I go places with her, her husband, and five year old son, I also started going to church with them and volunteering in the nursery/childcare.
I just got back from California Christmas visit we had with our family out there. It was nice for the most partI stayed with my aunt because there was no way I was going to stay in a house with my mom and her grandkids. Sorry ... not crazy. I actually made blankets for the twins, my sister's twins will be 2 at the end of January, and they turned out pretty nice. I was doing real good that whole week with being able to move independantly, find the front doors, walk up the sidewalks, and get in and out of unfamiliar cars. That is until Thursday night when I had to go to my sister's house since we were leaving early the next morning. I had three main things wrong with that house:
1. it is too big
2. it is too open
3. there are no other ambient noises, like a fridge, fishtank, or fans going on to help me navigate the house.
All in all I got lost once in the kitchen at 4am looking for the bathroom downstairs to dry my hair. Then I got lost trying to find the living room where my backpack and cane were waiting for me.
The best part was my trip down the stairs I took Thursday night.... It is a two story house and I had made it up fine, but when I went to go downstairs I made the mistake of having stuff in my hands and even though I held onto the railing my foot slipped on a stair for the second flight and I fell down the stairs. I hit my chin pretty good, there was a big bruise on my face. I also landed on my right knee and I guess drug my right shin across a stair because there is a huge bruise and massive rugburn on my leg. My upper body hurt the next day, including my biceps which I didn't get. Mainly because I tried to keep my head and shoulders up because I didn't want to go ass over tea kettle.
I did mark up my sister's new house before the twins did! lol I left a scuff mark near the railing because of my bracelet and another on the wall from my jeans. Fun stuff got even more so when we started a 20 hour car ride the next morning. :P
In comparison to what I've heard lately from other people, namely the mailing lists for the blind I'm subscribed to, your post is so not TMI.
I don't know if I have TMI issues or just that I babble too much. I hope your post was the beginning of a lot more posts to be honest. I was feeling withdrawl from book talk in general.
Hey, no it does not sound morbid. I am an only child and I wanted to marry into a large family, to experience 'siblings' and now I am like, 'what the fuck was I thinking!' I think his family's problems mainly stem from the fact that none of the women have ever worked and to them household chores are the epitome of what a woman can do. Plus they don't read, and only entertainment is soap operas (which are nasty in India).
Plus there is a bit of jealousy factor, maybe subconsciously, because I have it so easy (as per them) compared to how their lives were after marriage. My sister in laws have pretty much devoted themselves to cooking, cleaning and raising their families. I don't even want kids as of now.
But yeah. So I just gave up on them. As for my husband, he's not exactly supportive, but he does understand that I won't tolerate any more interference in my life. I was willing to tolerate a lot in the beginning coz I loved and respected his family, but by creating issues between my husband and I on purpose, they have lost that. I don't give a damn about them anymore (or so I project, tho it does hurt sometimes).
I know what you mean about not getting a divorce. I am still living with him, and we are okay with each other, but in India - marriage is pretty much about two families coming together and we do NOT have that at all. But at the same time, being together is better than being single. And yeah, since I am not gonna marry again, I might as well stick around.
Dear Lord!!! I am amazed at you for travelling the next day. If I was that hurt I would not move for a few days at least. It sounds interesting though.
I am glad you are making things work. I have that issue too. My husband would be out of town every other weekend, visiting his family, and I would stay at home alone rather than go visit anyone coz I felt like I was imposing - and I did not want anyone to think I was only there coz I was lonely.
My cousin, his wife and some friends took the time to drum it into my head that they like having me around and it is not an imposition in the least. I think that has helped me a lot in getting back on my feet. I had started to feel worthless, coz if I was worth hanging out with, why would he leave me alone so often. But I am of course worth hanging out with... and I had to understand that this is the only way he can keep his family off my back - by giving them time enough for both of us.
I guess so many things are about perspective. Mine is finally improving. Finally!! I had missed being me.
I am glad this is not TMI. Well, this post still might be. But I have missed speaking to people so much. I am extremely social and I had retreated into this shell, and I never ever want to do that again. Ever.
Mod
Llaph! OMG! Be careful out there! This sounds like a horrible fall down those stairs!
I'm busy with the usual stuff. Work, the dogs (our own and those we take care of in the shelter), the house (still a lot to renovate) and some reading.
Sarah ♥ Vutch forever ♥ wrote: "Aruuuuuuuuushi! I missed you so much! I'll send you an e-mail! "I missed you tooo!!! Loads!!! Will wait for your email.
And if I have not said it before, I am so so proud of you for working with dogs at the shelter.
I love them, and because of you, I know I am gonna get dogs from a shelter whenever I do. And if possible, I will get a bulldog.
Welcome Back!!You guys have definitely been busy!
@ Arushi - Good for you!! :D
@ Llaph - I hope you're okay! That sounded quite painful!
Not much news from me - but I'm still lurking about. ;P
Arushi and Llaph, I have missed you both!Jax, it's so good to know that you are still around, too.
Thank you so so much guys!! I am getting all teary eyed here... seriously!! How I have missed you :) Thanks Jax :) and Thanks Kathleen!
@Arushi:Just FYI I put a lot of my babbling under spoiler tags.
“I am an only child and I wanted to marry into a large family, to experience 'siblings' and now I am like, 'what the fuck was I thinking!'”
lol @ you
I have 2 sisters, my mom had 6 brothers and sisters and each of them had at least 2 kids, one had 5. My sister, Tina, married into a large Hispanic family. We laugh at her too.
“I think his family's problems mainly stem from the fact that none of the women have ever worked and to them household chores are the epitome of what a woman can do. Plus they don't read, and only entertainment is soap operas (which are nasty in India).”
I totally agree with you there. I read in a lot of places that society has really screwed with women and how they should treat each other. If you think about a lot of books there is rarely ever a female friend for the main character and most other women are evil biotches….
(view spoiler)
“As for my husband, he's not exactly supportive, but he does understand that I won't tolerate any more interference in my life. I was willing to tolerate a lot in the beginning coz I loved and respected his family, but by creating issues between my husband and I on purpose, they have lost that. I don't give a damn about them anymore (or so I project, though it does hurt sometimes).”
I hope, for your sake, that they get over themselves. A life steeped in jealousy and hate is a wasted life. Plus I hope that your husband doesn’t get stuck in the middle of that crap. They shouldn’t make it a thing between them and you, it’s stupid as shit.
“Dear Lord!!! I am amazed at you for travelling the next day. If I was that hurt I would not move for a few days at least. It sounds interesting though.”
I think I’m more embarrassed than anything to be honest. Good thing for me that I have good pain meds didn’t sleep the night before we left, and have noise cancelling headphones because I pretty much slept both legs of the trip.
(view spoiler)
hee hee
I’ve been living in this house for almost 10 years and my friends have lived .3 miles from my house for about the same amount of time. I had finally had enough because my mom constantly made me feel like I was being an imposition to her, my sister spends a lot of time at work, and my dad (who is really hard of hearing) doesn’t drive unless he has to. I spend all day with my dad, but the only way I know that is because the dogs congregate around him instead of me, like they used to. I don’t think I’ve actually talked to my dad in months. The only thing I hear from him is him yelling my name for dinner….
One example of me pulling my head out of my butt and asking for help outside family:
(view spoiler)
It’s so very frustrating to realize these things after so long. I mean I’m now 37 years old and I’m just now getting over and dealing with things that screwed me up while I was growing up.
Good for you that you are getting it now and are intelligent enough to be aware of the crap around you. I always thought of you as a social person and figured since you got married and stuff that you just had other stuff to keep you busy. The best thing to learn and know is that with the internet and family you aren’t really ever alone unless you choose to be. Err, that kinda sounds scary, lol.
@SarahFebruary will be the 10 year anniversary of my stroke and losing my sight and that fall is the worst I’ve hurt myself in all of those years. Hence why I was mostly embarrassed, lol
I wish I could volunteer at a shelter, but that really isn’t that feasible since I am blind. With my luck I’ll get a dog whose not that used to people and will try to eat my face off or something. I’ll stick to volunteering to babysit and help my friend home school her 5 year old when I can.
@Arushi:"if possible, I will get a bulldog. "
good on you, I heard that they tend to have a lot of health issues. So if yoo do have a chance to I'd look into all that the dog will need. All animals need some loving. It stinks how a lot of people will "throw away" a dog that needs a little extra care.
I've always got my dogs from shelters or adopted them from rescues. I like my mutts. If I could I'd get another dog, but it would just get absorbed into my dad's pack and I'd never see it. Well, unless it is grooming time, they need a haircut, I have to brush or clip their nails, or I have a check-up for them (those are special dental treats that I don't give them everyday since my dad stuffs them with chews and biscuits I think.)
Also, yes it is possible for a blind person to use the clippers to give a dog a haircut and to also trim their nails. lol It is kinda funny how my dad, who is deathly afraid of hurting his dogs, won't give them haircuts or trim their nails but will let his blind daughter do it.
See, this is a prime example of you never know unless you ask. lol@Jax:
I have a stupid high tolerance and a special view on pain so I don't think about it much. I remember when I felt myself starting to fall "oh shit, this stinks" and as soon as I hit the bottom I jumped up like I wanted to hide that I fell. Though ... the sound of my ass falling down the stairs was highly audible.
@Kathleen:
I have been hear but I'm a pro lurker, lol.
Llaph | No Frill | No Shill wrote: "@Arushi:Just FYI I put a lot of my babbling under spoiler tags.
“I am an only child and I wanted to marry into a large family, to experience 'siblings' and now I am like, 'what the fuck was I th..."
Hey, so.. first off I love the idea of putting stuff under spoiler tags... so anyone who wants to read can.. and those who don't can easily skip it.
(view spoiler)
It is hard when you end up feeling a bit alone even when there are people around you. I am so so proud of you Llaph.
About getting a dog.
(view spoiler)
Yeah.. even I was surprised by how much I had retreated into a shell - when I finally realized it. Thank you. I am so glad I finally came back to me. Mostly.
I used to do this when I would ramble in the “What are you reading” thread, lol. The only thing that stinks about it is that if a person is using the mobile app they will only see “removed spoilers.” I haven’t figured out how to read spoilers in threads yet, only in reviews.(view spoiler)
Yeah, that feeling of being alone even when in a crowd. I was really tired of holing up in my room and reading all of the time. I still read all of the time, but I get out too, lol. That and I thought about my situation, I’m 37 I would like to get married, and stay that way, and not to the type of man I always attracted. A kid or two would be nice, but I will be okay not having one yet or if ever. This world just makes me sad at times and I don’t think I want to bring a child into it. Plus I don’t want to be an old mom and want to be there for them for a long time. I’ll settle with spoiling my niece, nephew, and friend’s kids. Having step kids wouldn’t be bad either, so long as they aren’t full of troubles and issues like my ex-husband’s kids were sadly.
(view spoiler)
In regards to dogs:
(view spoiler)
Llaph | No Frill | No Shill wrote: "I used to do this when I would ramble in the “What are you reading” thread, lol. The only thing that stinks about it is that if a person is using the mobile app they will only see “removed spoilers..."Hey, so basically... I agree with you on almost everything. And thank you so much Llaph. I am so glad you're my friend.
Lots of love!
Happy NEW Year in advance everyone :D
Let's all have a great 2017!!!
Mod
Happy New Year 2017!!!!! Have a great year guys!! May you find happiness, peace and lots of prosperity :) Love you lots and lots!!!
Time like this being blind really annoys me to no end. I need to get into the habit of making an actual reminder to go back and reply to something instead of "making a mental note" too easy to forget!I don't have much to share except how much I am loving this Camp Gladiator thingee. I've been sticking to going M, W, and F to the morning class @ 8:30am.
I got to run for the first time in forever and now it's non-plus for a classmate to offer me an arm to go jog or walk around the track. That makes me happy, lol. I'm just not jazzed that my trainer takes videos of me to put onFB live to show me off. I never know about those until I check FB. He took a video of me jump roping too. I was just glad I didn't whack myself in the head ... I just tried to whack him with the rope. When he said something about it I reminded him that he is the sighted one so he should've gotten out of the way.
The only thing keeping me from going is the stress I get from my dad having a hissy fit when the location has to change. The other day it was because the rain flooded the road to the park so it was closed. The other park is 13 minutes away instead of 9 minutes. He doesn't say he won't take me he just acts like it is a huge imposition to him that the weather deigned to rain and mess up his plans. I'm working with my trainer to help me learn the parking lot better so that I can get out of the truck and walk to him on my own so my dad doesn't grab my wrist and lead me like I'm a naughty child or something. The other thing I need to ignore is my mom and her debbie-downer attitude telling me that he is only accomidating me to get my money and that the course is too expensive compared to a gym membership.
1. He actually went to school for this and his employment history shows his dedication to this sort of thing. Yeah he is excited because he will be able to take what he learns from figuring out exercises for me to do for other people down the road. I'd like to think I'm good at telling emotions from people's voices and he sounds genuine.
2. Yeah gyms are open all of the time, but I would have to worry about transportation, figuring out where to go, how to use the machines, and hope I'm doing it right. With CG I basically have a personal trainer 24/7 and a support group of my classmates (who have all levels of ability to do the same exercises)
Whoa that sounded like a commercial or something, lol.
@Arushi:
I hope things are continuing to get better for you.
Just as an aside I really admire you guys who know more than one language. I have trouble trying to learn how to use my own language correctly. So many freaking rules....
Hey Llaph :) Gym sounds good.. and ignore stuff that is bringing it down for you... I used to go for a few months and then moved cities so had to stop... but it was really nice. And its hard to get a good trainer so I am glad you got one... It did not sound like a commercial.. it sounded like genuine appreciation..
Things are getting better for me... plus to be very honest.. I have become rather tough... I don't really wait for something to go wrong.. I have learnt to anticipate the pitfalls and warn my husband in advance not to screw it up... Very Machiavellian I am becoming... Better to be feared and happy than to be not loved enough and miserable.. or some such...
But yeah generally, I am now good with demanding what I want instead of feeling unappreciated. And giving back as much as I am okay with and saying no when I cannot do more, in no uncertain terms.
You know.. with me... it happened coz there was no choice. In our school, we HAD to speak in English from kindergarten, in spite of the fact that it was no our mother tongue. Convent education in India is renowned for churning out fluent English speakers. To top it off, I always was reading and so many books were in English - so I could not let language hold me back. And then, at that time, there used to be Cartoon Network with the Hannah-Barbara shows - and it was also in English - so for the love of TV, I became an extremely fluent bilingual. In fact, now they have TV in several languages and I think because of that kids miss out. Plus, the translations are generally ruder than the original.
Then Hindi is my mother tongue and we spoke it at home. So that came naturally. Plus my grandmom and other older members of the family spoke our dialect, Rajasthani, which is very similar to Hindi but indigenous to my state. And because of that.. I also understand a few other languages which are very similar - and can speak them a bit.
Really great to hear that everyone's 2017 seems to be off to a decent start! Already posted a little about this in the "what are you reading thread" - Grad school was insanely hard last semester. I spent a lot of time stressed out and upset and didn't read as much. I didn't come on here because I felt like I had nothing new to add to the discussion. But things are looking up now! I have a research advisor for my PhD thesis so I can take research credits instead of a third class. I feel like my work load is more manageable. My one big New Years resolution was to treat school like a regular 9-5 job and work in my office instead of just going home after class. This way I accomplish things while I'm at school and don't end up doing work so late into the night. So far, so good.
Claire wrote: "Really great to hear that everyone's 2017 seems to be off to a decent start! Already posted a little about this in the "what are you reading thread" - Grad school was insanely hard last semester. I..."Hey Claire! Welcome Back!!!
I saw the GR notification mail and rushed here with finger crossed - "please be our Claire, please be our Claire". Hope you don't think I am creepy :)
I am glad school is better now and you are sticking to your schedule. IT really can get very hard to separate yourself from your work.
so happy you're back!
Mod
It's a good idea to have a schedule and stick to it. I'm a freelancer and this really helps me to get things done. It can be very distracting to work from home.
Thanks, guys!!@Arushi No I don't think it's creepy at all.
I'm so annoyed at myself that I didn't think of this discipline earlier. I'm normally very good at starting my work as soon as I get it.
@Sarah I didn't know you were a freelancer! Do you work also work in writing?
Mod
@Arushi: Not to sound creepy myself, but you are too sweet to be creepy. lol
@Claire:
Good thing to learn that lesson early in life. I don't know how many times I just kept working, would look up to see it was 8pm (when I had got to work @ 9am) and freaked out at still being at work. If you don't cut yourself off you run the chance of working yourself to death practically. Work is still going to be there so taking a break to shower, eat, and sleep won't hurt. So long as you don't put it off indefinitely that is.
I still haven't decided exactly what I want to do, which is messed up I know, but things kept happening so that I couldn't concentrate on figuring out what I can do. Well, without having to formally go back to school that is. That is a whole different set of fears for me to pile on top of the anxiety I get about going outside alone, lol.
I looked at editing, proof reading, or even transcribing. But I think my grammar and grasp of English stinks, no matter how much studying I am putting into it.
My first month of camp is over and ... I haven't lost any weight. I'm more concerned about being healthy and getting my mobility and agility back, losing weight would just be a side bonus, and I avoided weighing myself most of the month.
Sarah ♥ Vutch forever ♥ wrote: "I'm a freelance translator. :-)"Wow, that's a lot work!
@Llaph Good for you on going to get in shape! Honestly I didn't get into really good shape until I stopped caring about how much I weighed. Once you find exercise you really enjoy doing, everything gets so much better.
Llaph | No Frill | No Shill wrote: "@Arushi: Not to sound creepy myself, but you are too sweet to be creepy. lol"
awwwww..
@Claire - Thanks :)
Adding here from another thread... Claire, try the works of Sarah J Maas. Her Throne of Glass series is really good (and more famous) but I like her Court of Thorns and Roses even more.
@Arushi Ah I think my friend has read those. Are the YA? That's generally not my bag
Claire wrote: "@Arushi Ah I think my friend has read those. Are the YA? That's generally not my bag"Hey. Not YA. The Court of Thorns and Roses is not YA at all. The first book sets the place up - and any issues you may have with it - will probably either gain a reason or get fixed in the second book - which is brilliant.
Throne of Glass initially feels like YA, but as the series progresses - the YA bit just falls away. It is by mid-second book that you start getting an idea of where the series is going.. and mid-third book that the real story comes to the fore. The previous bit was important, but now its really going.
Arushi wrote: "Claire wrote: "@Arushi Ah I think my friend has read those. Are the YA? That's generally not my bag"Hey. Not YA. The Court of Thorns and Roses is not YA at all. The first book sets the place up -..."
Ah okay, good. I'll check those out then!
My parents are coming to visit this weekend, which is gonna be great. Not great: my homework isn't working and now I'm going to have to try and finish while my family is in town.
awww...hope you have fun... and survive the monday after with aplomb :) My childhood friend was here for a night on wednesday... and I partied after a very long time... we literally danced until the bar closed... proper girls night out..
before that, whenever I heard a peppy number i used to go all,.... I wanna dance... for the past two days instead I have been like.... nah.. lemme recover first :D
Arushi wrote: "awww...hope you have fun... and survive the monday after with aplomb :) My childhood friend was here for a night on wednesday... and I partied after a very long time... we literally danced until ..."
That sounds great! Glad you had a good time. It's important to take moments to reconnect with our good friends sometimes.
I loved seeing my parents but my dad got shingles. He had meds for sciatica (nerve pain) which really helped with the pain of the shingles. So it was uncomfortable but not incapacitating. Still, not the most enjoyable visit. Looking forward to seeing them and my sister over spring break in a couple weeks.
Karen Chance Fans
Books mentioned in this topic
The Lycan Hunter (other topics)Black Arts (other topics)
The Shepherd (other topics)
Chimes at Midnight (other topics)
To Be or Not To Be: A Chooseable-Path Adventure (other topics)
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I hope everyone had a great Mothers' Day! If you celebrated it yesterday, that is. This was the first year I couldn't be with my mom, since my parents were moving my little sister out of college.
In other news: I found out I was accepted to NYU for graduate school! I am thrilled, because:
1) I didn't think I'd get in
2) Their applied math program is the best in the country. Like, better than Princeton. (see no. 1)
I'm a little freaked because:
1) I already kinda said I'd go to NC State
2) the program at NYU is a master's, not a PhD (no funding)
3) Now I have to choose between the two and idk how I'm going to do it