Help With Story Problems

[Jordan, The Picture Magician (aka Probie)]

or maybe theyll say, "Dude! awesome straitjacket!" and ill be like, "Yeah, it is pretty cool."

[Isaac]

Jordan wrote: "probably something like "Wow, took ya long enough.""

TRUE... DAT.

[Laura]

HAHA.

[Jordan, The Picture Magician (aka Probie)]

it would probably be the most likely thing for people to say.

[Tesssss cool story broo]

eat chocolate! always helps! (i think theres been a scientific study on it or sumthing)

[Tesssss cool story broo]

Woops forgot the capitals! :P

[Jordan, The Picture Magician (aka Probie)]

what about the half thats not serious? :)

[Isaac]

Indecisive Dayna wrote: "Mae Marie wrote: "Indecisive Dayna wrote: "No. I'm just.... you know... not motivated."

Oh... I get that. Are you in the middle of a book or you're just not writing anything?"

Middle. *Cries out*"

Oh, I hate that! I always either lose motivation, think my story is horrible and delete it, or just have no ideas. :|

[Jordan, The Picture Magician (aka Probie)]

wow....your mind is conflicted.

[Luna]

Bri wrote: "I'm trying to write a story about a girl who has the power to move things with her mind and also to read other minds. She ends up being a super hero kind of thing, in a group with other kids her ag..."

She should live with one parent and she's trying to hide her powers from every one.

[Luna]

Hey I need help I'm writing a story about a demigod.Her name is Ruby.Her mom is Artemis and Her dad is from a planet far away.She will have two brothers(right now she only has one).She was choosen to be Princess(which is like queen)and on the day she was born a war started Between her planet and another planet.Any way people are going to die And she will come to Earth and stuff.Any way it's pretty tragic(one of the characters above are going to die Like Half way Through the story)Any way I need to Know if this is a good story.If you want to read some of it its on goodreads and go tothe seach bow and type in Carjealeau and go to stories it will be the only story you get.

[Jordan, The Picture Magician (aka Probie)]

i give it an 8/10. Very good, but you should maybe have what happens to the planet if the war doesnt end until later in the story. suspense is a great way to get people to keep reading your story. Its really great though. :)

[Luna]

Jordan wrote: "i give it an 8/10. Very good, but you should maybe have what happens to the planet if the war doesnt end until later in the story. suspense is a great way to get people to keep reading your story. ..."

Look I Know but i have an idea and I have to kill them when I get there it might make more sense

[Elliott]

When I'm not motivated, I start a new story. But that's just me.

[Elliott]

Pretty much. But I only have like 6.

[Jo]

i´m stuck in my story because i don´t know how to make the narrator NOT seem the protagonist

[Jo]

hmph. the protagonist is "really inmature". like that?

[Elliott]

Wait, is the narrator the protagonist and you just want them not to seem like it? Or is the narrator just a random/important secondary character?