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If Your Blank Could Talk, What Would It Say?
"Don't be daft. How am I meant to clean those bits?"
If your CLOTHES could talk, what would they say?
If your CLOTHES could talk, what would they say?

If your LIGHTER could talk, what would it say?

If your MOUSE PAD could talk, what would it say?

If your BOWL OF FRUIT could talk, what would it say?

If a PROCTOLOGIST'S FINGER could talk, what would it say?

If a CONDOM could talk what would it say?

If a STRIPPER'S POLE could talk, what would it say?
*cackle!* Even I wasn't going to touch that one. Brave girl.

If a BROTHEL could talk, what would it say?

If the MARIO BROTHERS could talk, what would they say?

If PRESCRIPTION DRUGS could talk, what would they say?

If your CD's could talk, what would they say?

If UNDER YOUR BED could talk, what would it say?

If Edgar Allen Poe could talk, what would he say?

If Edgar Allan Poe could talk, what would he say?

If A STRING OF MARDI GRAS BEADS could talk, what would it say?
I'm always left hanging around. Not fair.
If your Pen could talk, what would it say?
If your Pen could talk, what would it say?

If a cigarette could talk, what would it say?

If a SQUIRREL could talk, what would it say?

If a CLOUD could talk, what would it say?
I haven't seen thunder clapping around here for a while. He's stormed off in a huff again.
If a mouse could talk, what would it say?
If a mouse could talk, what would it say?

If your COFFEE CUP could talk, what would it say?

If your CELL PHONE could talk, what would it say?

If your GARBAGE DISPOSAL could talk, what would it say?

If a woman's "cat" could talk, what would it say?

If a POLAR BEAR could talk, what would it say?

If a JUST-CAUGHT FISH could talk, what would it say?

If the STARS could talk, what would they say?

If your Toe Nail Clippers could talk, what would they say?
Don't you dare stick me in there again. Swine.
If your ARMPIT could talk, what would it say?
If your ARMPIT could talk, what would it say?

It your COMB could talk, what would it say?

If your NAILS could talk, what would they say?

If your HEART could talk, what would it say?
Please take the hairs out of my mouth.
If your SOCKS could talk, what would it say?
If your SOCKS could talk, what would it say?
If DIET SODA could talk, what would it say?