Chapter 1: James

[☆ ɪʀɪꜱ ☆- ᴍʏ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ꜱᴀʏɪɴɢ, <3 helper]

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[Kacper]

where the scene take place?

[Kacper]

The most of ppl in the concentration camp was jews from Europe

[★ Sai ★ june hiatus]

i love this <33 the last line is making me wanna read chapter 2 lol

[୨୧ zafirah ୨୧ (my gfs ver I published a bookkkk), Helper #2 <3]

I genuinely love this. I’m typically more in to fantasy and romance, but this genuinely draws my attention. The writing sounds really good and captivating. No mistakes or repetitions of words, and the way you write is very immersive. I can picture myself in the place you’re describing, and I absolutely adore your writing style. Though this typically isn’t my style, I would 100% read it all the way through. It sounds like you did your research which I really appreciate. Great job so far!

[୨୧ zafirah ୨୧ (my gfs ver I published a bookkkk), Helper #2 <3]

I love the attention detail, and I just saw your researching and brainstorming page and wow. Just wow. You put a lot of time and effort into this and it shows. If I’m being honest, I can’t really find anything to critique. I think you did extremely well and this book has lot of potential if you keep writing this well. I would love to read chapter two, cause now I’m hooked lol

[୨୧ zafirah ୨୧ (my gfs ver I published a bookkkk), Helper #2 <3]

Np :) I’m your writing it shows that you enjoyed writing about this, which helps hook your reader and makes it a better read overall.

[[deleted user]]

Omg this is something good!!

[★ Sai ★ june hiatus]

i really like how you get into the mc's mind. you can understand his thought processes exactly and feel like you're him, experiencing life through his eyes

[★ Sai ★ june hiatus]

"As we get closer and closer, to what most probably, will be my end, I am not scared. I am not dreading this or fearing this like most people would. I knew it would probably happen eventually. I knew I would get captured, or shot down, or tortured, gassed. It was bound to happen. I’m not scared of pain or dying, but at the same, I’m terrified. But not of death. Of the unknown. Of what lies ahead of me. That is the only thing that scares me. Not because I’m reckless, or have a death wish. No because I’ve seen more death in the past year than a person should ever see in their life."

this part especially, you're such a talented writer ava omg 👌👌

[Ophelia ೀ Moon (fly high angel)]

This is soooo good omgggg

[Rahul]

Nothin much to say😉

[★ Sai ★ june hiatus]

thinking very hard to come up with a critique lol...but i feel like if you really wanted you could make the first chapter (like this one) a little more gripping, like in the beginning. like something shocking or exciting so it's kind of like a hook in an essay. like maybe you could start with the gore to create some shock? idk, you don't have to listen to me if you don't want me to

[★ Sai ★ june hiatus]

but i'm being honest ava your writing is really really good, and i can tell you love your wips lol, you're a really great writer ❤️