Hi all - interested in query sample swaps (typically first 10 pages or 5k words)? I am not a query letter expert per se but I can give you a fellow writer's opinion on whether your sample kept me reading.
Here is the teaser I include in my queries - if you're interested please email me chris (dot) a (dot) tubbs (at) gmail.com
Mason is still traumatized decades after his parents' violent divorce and angered when his abusive father suddenly dies before he can confront him. All Mason wants is love and stability and to find someone who can heal his scars. But Mason self-sabotages, paralyzed with fear that he'll hurt others just like his father did.
Luck turns Mason’s way when he lands a promising sales job at a startup called DreamR. He discovers that the company is building a secret memory capture headset codenamed SibylX. Mason uses it to revisit his past and project his future through simulations. Though Mason hates what he sees at first, he soon uses the knowledge to fix mistakes before they happen and turn his life around. He even overcomes the resistance of a woman with a dark past named Paige and wins her love, though he wonders if she’ll stay true to him. It is like he has found the cheat codes to life, and promised to try them only once, but now he is addicted.
Damon, the ruthless founder of DreamR, has other plans. He intends to bring SibylX to the mass market, calculating that he can use the memory data to gain unlimited wealth and societal control. When Damon discovers his one prototype is missing, he swears to hunt down the thief and retake it at any cost.
Mason's love, life, and the fate of the world are all at stake. Can he trust his moral convictions, and Paige’s loyalty enough to thwart Damon’s twisted plans?
Here is the teaser I include in my queries - if you're interested please email me chris (dot) a (dot) tubbs (at) gmail.com
Mason is still traumatized decades after his parents' violent divorce and angered when his abusive father suddenly dies before he can confront him. All Mason wants is love and stability and to find someone who can heal his scars. But Mason self-sabotages, paralyzed with fear that he'll hurt others just like his father did.
Luck turns Mason’s way when he lands a promising sales job at a startup called DreamR. He discovers that the company is building a secret memory capture headset codenamed SibylX. Mason uses it to revisit his past and project his future through simulations. Though Mason hates what he sees at first, he soon uses the knowledge to fix mistakes before they happen and turn his life around. He even overcomes the resistance of a woman with a dark past named Paige and wins her love, though he wonders if she’ll stay true to him. It is like he has found the cheat codes to life, and promised to try them only once, but now he is addicted.
Damon, the ruthless founder of DreamR, has other plans. He intends to bring SibylX to the mass market, calculating that he can use the memory data to gain unlimited wealth and societal control. When Damon discovers his one prototype is missing, he swears to hunt down the thief and retake it at any cost.
Mason's love, life, and the fate of the world are all at stake. Can he trust his moral convictions, and Paige’s loyalty enough to thwart Damon’s twisted plans?