Young Adult Roleplay discussion
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Annabeth + Applejaxc
message 51:
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☆ ĄňŊǡƂėƮĦ ☆
(new)
Mar 08, 2015 10:26AM
(oh okay. I wasn't sure what to have Aria's book be about besides a romance. Maybe an adventure where a prince is taken and there is a princess that has to save him but in the beginning they don't like each other.)
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(Well, do you want her to be a cliche author or something genuinely unique?)
(I want it to be unique so it goes against Theo and surprises him)
(Woman-saves-man is definitely counterintuitive to the genre, but alone isn't a significant departure from "conventional" stories. Do you know what a "Mary Sue" is?)
(A "Mary Sue"-Gary Stu for men-is a very bland, 2-dimensional character that's used to appeal to as many people as possible. Bella in Twilight, for example, is a moody teenager with relationship trouble and zero physical description so as many teenage girls and lonely adult women can "be" her. She has to be saved by a man and never meets another female character that isn't either an enemy or to discuss a relationship.From Wikipedia: "In [fiction], a Mary Sue or, in case of a male character, Gary Stu or Marty Stu is an idealized character, often but not necessarily an author insert and/or wish-fulfillment."
They're what most roleplayers make all of their characters)
(oh okay. No I think that the girl character shouldn't be a Mary Sue and instead be specific or unique)
(http://www.springhole.net/writing/mar... is great for seeing if a character is a cliche)The walk across the street as a slow one, with a huge crowd fighting traffic to reach the other building. Theodore had split from Bernie, leaving the first building through a side door. Coincidentally, it was the exit most convenient for Aria; it was closest to her booth and was the least packed.
Aria was walking out through the door alone, since Clara had parked her car on the opposite side of the building, when she bumped into Theodore. "Hey, fancy meeting you hear," Aria said smiling.
Theodore looked over his shoulder, then turned his head away to roll his eyes even as he replied with a measured greeting in an amiable tone. "Hello, again." He was at least polite enough to hold the door for her (but let it close on the group coming after them). "Have you been nickle-and-dimed for a sequel, yet?"
She laughed at his comment and then answered, "No, but I do hope to write a sequel. More for myself though to see if I can do it and have it better than the first." She was surprised that he had held the door for her but not surprised when he dropped it on those behind her.
"That's how it starts," he warned cynically. "And then you hate it." He knew she was walking to see the shows he had no interest in, but he was bored and wished to continue his cynical complaints; he walked in the same direction.
She looked over him not expecting an author to say that and asked, "Don't you like writing?" Aria thought about how would never be able to hate writing even if the books weren't popular of that successful because she loved writing.
"Oh love writing," Theodore replied, not entirely convincingly. "I just hate my publisher. And contractual obligations. And the Internet. And... everything about it."
"Wow that is a lot of stuff to hate," Aria said trying to keep her laugh inside because she didn't want him to get even angrier.
"But you're new. The world hasn't decided to hate you yet."
Aria didn't know how to respond to this and decided to change the subject. "So what are these shows about?" she asked.
Theodore shrugged. "Some movie trailers for the sell-outs, some advertisements for the next-to-sell-outs. There might be a play or something."
Aria said, "That might be interesting. Maybe I'll get some inspiration there." They continued to walk to where the show was going to be held.
Theodore was glad he was a step ahead of her; his indignant eye-roll was nonmaskable. "Maybe," he forced in the same practiced, even tone. "Ma-""Mr. Ackabecker!" The man from earlier, with the special forces tattoo on his wrist that had given him a fright, turned the corner. It as then that Theodore became acutely aware of the fact that they were standing in an alley, and alone.
"...uh, yeah... the one and only..." He looked over his shoulder at Aria, worry hidden by shadow. The man raised an arm to shoulder-level, a particularly dangerous metal object in his hand making a particularly dangerous crick-click as he did so. "Autograph this!"
There was a bang. A bang that was not followed by the incredible pain or death Theodore (or Aria) expected. It did not come from before them; rather, there was a quite deafening bang from behind them, and the supersonic crack of a bullet passing within inches of either of their heads to drill through the nose of the man in front of them.
"Autograph: Denied."
At the other end of the alley stood a tall and slender man shouldering a rifle unlike anything Aria had seen before. Whether it was the one-liner or the fact that he had just saved his life, the man exuded an air of deadly confidence, magnified when, as he lowered the rifle, he said quite simply: "Come with me if you want to live."
(I'm sorry I avoided posting for so long. I appreciate that you've responding to all of my posts within 10 minutes. I was afraid that the above post would be over the top for you, but if I kept putting it off we were both going to lose interest. I would appreciate if you could reciprocate with a similar level and length of writing but I understand if you are uncomfortable breaking your 5-line standard)
Aria had turned her body to Theo when he started to talk but then jumped away she saw the tattooed man. She thought that she recognized him. This wouldn't be impossible since there had been many people at the writing convention and she was almost in the center of the building.Aria looked around trying to see if there was anyone to help them but, alas, they were in the middle of an alley secluded from everyone. This confirmed her fear that they were alone. She looked over at Theo and could see similar thoughts running through his mind. Aria turned back the man in time to see a harsh looking metal clutched in his large hand. When she heard the noise, she flinched knowing what happened next.
She was, pleasantly, surprised when it did not but frightened when another man shot the one that was going to attack them. Aria quickly turned to that man just as he said that they should go with them.
Theodore looked between the man that was dead and the one that killed him. He found himself in a half-lunge, as if to cocer Aria in the expectation of a fatal bullet; he righted himself, then straightened his jacket. "...why?""People want to kill you. I don't."
Theodore couldnt refute that logic. "Very well then."
"And don't try to call the police. They'd only complicate things."
The man looked down either side of the alley, then raised a hand to his ear. "Zulu-profect secure. Safety Net to Drill Team: one minute." He turned his attention back to them. "Come with me Ackabecker."
Theodore took a step but didnt follow. "What about her?"
"She can come. Or stay and get shot by the next assassin."
Whether Aria followed or not, the man who had called himself "Safety Net" walked to the end of the alley, followed by Theodore. When he reached the end, he turned and stepped into a sidestreet, where a large, black van was waiting.
Aria watched Theo straighten up and decided that she should too since she was still hiding her head behind her arms slightly. She stood up and realized that she was shaking. This was new to her since she normally didn't get rattled.Aria studied the man who had just shot someone and tried to see if he was joking about how they were supposed to go with him. She guessed that he wasn't since he had just shot someone. This made her slowly reach for her cell phone to call the police but then she heard his commanding voice to not and she put it back.
Aria listened to Theo's question with the man and wondered how he would just trust a murderer. She was pondering this when Theo asked about what she should do and got even more nervous. Then, Aria saw the "Safety Net" walk away with Theodore trailing and she didn't know what to do. She looked down at the assassin and she decided to follow them in to the black van that was waiting for them to get in.
A door on the van rolled open. Inside was a man and a woman, dressed like Safety Net, wearing long coats to hide all-black suits of some kind of mesh. Their escort stood by the open door, waiting for them to get in."...and I assume if I don't get in, the consequences are worse than taking the other pill?" Theodore asked, an allusion to The Matrix.
"Unfortunately, I can't afford to leave you on the street Mr. Ackabecker. I understand your trepidation but I'd advise you to get in quickly." At that point, neither of them had much choice; Safety Net maneuvered behind them in such a manner as to block any attempt to turn back. "Ah, Hell..." Theodore mumbled as he climbed in. The man and woman looked away from either window that they watched as he did so. The woman spoke: "You'd forgive me for not standing to salute, sir; this van is far from accommodating cadre."
"'Salute?' That isn't necessary..." He buckled himself into a seat; if he was going to die, he'd prefer it not be from a broken neck.
Aria got into the van warily after seeing two more people who looked like Safety Net. She smiled weakly at Theo's joke but it did nothing to relieve the tension that was in the air of the van. She was thinking about leaving and going back but she saw that Safety Net was blocking the only exit beside the one that was behind the others. She sighed and sat down in her seat and buckled up not knowing how the strangers were going to drive.As the others finished their conversation, Aria said, "Okay guys, I have some questions that I probably should have answered before I got into this van with matching ninjas. One is, who are you? What are you doing with us? How do you know us? Who was the man that just attacked us? And, why did just murder?" Her voice was steadily rising as she counted off each question with her fingers. She had many more but those were the basic ones that had to get answered.
Safety Net pulled himself into the van, pulling the door shut behind himself. He remained there in a crouch, his back against the door, due to the absence of seats. He rested his rifle across his lap. "Mr. Ackabecker could do a better job explaining what we are.""Like Hell I can."
"Don't play dumb, please. The enemy has identified itself, and you. It's time to stop hiding." A rectangle of laminated paper was thrown in Theodore's lap, along with a flashlight. He clicked it on to find a map of the city, lines and symbols covering it. "What is this?"
"Exfil plan. Unless you have a better idea."
Theodore raised the flashlight to illuminate his three captors. The van roared to life after a fourth called from the front, informing them he was ready to go.
The light displayed them all more fully: The suits were some kind of mesh, and were in two pieces, shirt and pants. Each wore a belt with a pistol on their hips and the woman carried an oversized knife on a lanyard. Safety Net removed his jacket, revealing the XKS18 patch on his left arm. Theodore's brows furrowed in confusion, then his eyes widened in realization:
"Is this what you think a goddamn fan club does?!"
Aria felt her face change into one of confusion when she heard Safety Net tell her that Theo would be able to explain it. This made no sense since he was just as confused as she was. She looked back over at Safety Net and saw that he still had his gun so she jumped away from him just in case he decided he was angry.Aria leaned forward to see what had been thrown in Theo's lap. She looked at it closely but still could make no sense of it. She turned to see if Theodore did. He obviously didn't when he asked what it was. Aria was still waiting for someone to explain when she heard and felt the car start and regretted coming in, again. Either way she was in it now, and would get the answers she had asked for.
Just then, Theo yelled about it being from a fanclub and she thought, "Is this from a book?"
"Look, I really appreciate how much work must have gone into this..." He offered Aria an apologetic look. "They're all cosplaying as members of the Xian-Ki-Shek. The, uh... good guys, in Starbomb.""Yes Mr. Ackabecker, that's a good cover story. It's how I passed my armor by the convention hall's security," Safety Net responded in the affirmative.
"And he calls himself 'Safety Net.' That's the operating name for recovery and escort teams. Security."
"Do you trust this woman to offer ORBAT?"
"Sure. Why not. She can be the damned princess of Equestria for all I care. Just next time you're going to surprise me, bring a clean pair of pants, would you?"
"Affirmative." Safety Net obviously failed to detect the sarcasm.
"So what is this? Are we driving to a dinner in my honor?"
"Not quite sir. You've been tagged; we are moving you under ground until a team is prepared. A sparrow will take you to the Starbomb."
Theodore rolled his eyes and shook his head slowly, quite amused. "It's not like I had plans. Will we be getting shot at anymore tonight?"
"Most likely, yes."
Aria listened thinking that these people might be serious and not just a really interested fan club for his book. She had no clue what they were talking about since she had not read his book, which she looked back on as unfortunate because it would have helped. Aria listened to their conversation to see if she could learn it but it was still confusing. I would have to ask Theodore about it later, she thought."Wait, everyone," she said, "What is ORBAT? What do you mean by us getting tagged? Are they keeping track of us now?"
Aria didn't like not understanding what they were talking about and she didn't like the idea of getting shot at when it might be the fault of these black-clad strangers.
"Order of Battle," Theodore answered. "Uh... like, rules of engagement? How to organize themselves, arm themselves, fight the Tsung autocrats. By 'tagged' he means the Tsung-Ki-Shek, the bad guys, have identified me and their special forces evidently are dedicated to my eradication." Theodore, obviously, did not take this seriously."I admire your compsure, Mr. Ackabecker. It is my hope to have such control of my fears in the face of the enemy."
"And I admire how dedicated you are to the roll." Theodore meant dedicated to acting; Safety Net did not interpret it as such. "My life for Xiang."
"Right, right... And maybe tomorrow night we'll get shot at and saved by a shirtless European on a white horse?" Theodore looked at Aria, as clueless about her book as she was of his.
Aria was watching their conversation and saw that Theo still believed that they were acting. She really doubted that. Aria was starting to understand his novel which was helping.When she saw that Theodore was looking at her and saying something about a European, she realized that he was making fun of her book.
"Have you even read my book?" she asked angry, "You can't just assume that the stereotypes of all sappy romance novels are the same. Mine is actually quite the opposite. The is a strong female character who know one would expect to be strong. She saves the mighty prince who was kidnapped by the enemy for money. The girl has to save him and her country otherwise the enemies would take over."
She was proud of her novel and wouldn't have the stereotypes say what her book was about.
Theodore laughed, out loud and in her face. "Oh, you gave it the old switcharoo did you?" he asked in an infuriatingly patronizing tone. "So, what? You made Mulan without the Huns or musical numbers?"
Aria got angry at his at him openly condensing her and her book. She hated people who were condescending and patronizing so she said, "And your book is much better? At least mine had an audience who read it. I bet the only people who read it were critics since they had to." Then she was the one laughing at his face.
Theodore stopped laughing. "...that's a fair point. But I don't see anyone dressing up because of anything you've written.""With all due respect, ma'am," Safety Net rentered the conversation, "No one ever gave their life for your manifestos."
Aria said back to Theodore, "There might be and at least if they are, they aren't attacking us," pointing out the fact that they were just attacked by something he made up.Then she said to Safety Net, "And don't you start." She snarled at him and turned her back on the both of them hoping that they would get the hint and be quiet.
"You're just mad because, though smaller, my fan club is way cooler than yours."
"Because killing people is so cool," she said with emphasis on "so."((When should we introduce my characters? Later?))
(Do you have characters to introduce?)"It's not like they actually shot a person!"
(I thought that we were going to have them come out of Aria's book but I might have misunderstood and it would probably be too much right now)"They just shot the tattooed guy!"
(Yes, her characters will come into the story. But right now we're dealing with the action characters. Or, at least, the more action-y characters)"Have you never seen a movie? Clearly he fired a blank, or I wouldn't be sitting in his van!"
The silence that followed was considerably uncomfortable. Theodore shined the flashlight on Safety Net.
"...I killed him where he stood, sir."
"Look, really, you can break character. Gold star for acting."
The woman spoke: "Sir? We're the Xiang-Ki-Shek. Your Xiang-Ki-Shek. This isn't a drill... is it?"
The man who hadn't spoken yet chimed in: "No, it isn't."
The driver offered his own input: "I wouldn't be taking all these crap back roads if it was. I spent an hour just getting this van to turn-over."
Aria listened to their conversation thinking that she was glad that her novel hadn't had this many characters otherwise it would have very complicated. She listened to them and said to Theodore, "I'm pretty sure that these people are serious and not just acting. I would doubt that actors would have real weapons and getaway cars."Aria looked out of the windows of the van to see if she could figure out where they were going but since she had never been in this state before, she had no idea.
They were still in the city, which, unfortunately, has no significant landmarks.Theodore became silent again while he thought. "... Are you guys on drugs?"
"Negative, sir."
"People not on drugs don't dress up and sit and kidnap."
"Kidnap? Sir, this is a rescue op..."
"Like hell it is!"
The man who want safety net or the driver crossed his arms. "Well you're alive aren't you?!"
Safety Net cut him off: "Nexon, you so not address a commanding officer like that!"
"'Nexon'? Out of all my books, you choose Nexon Montgomery? The worst Xiang-Ki-Shek operator in the history of ever?"
Aria was still trying to remember where they were so in case she escaped she can get away to where she had been but it was no use. She sighed and fixed her hair which had gotten messed up. Aria was listening to their conversation and at this point it was annoying that Theodore was still thinking that they were acting. When they got to the part about Theodore being a commanding officer, she snorted thinking that he couldn't be in command in anything, even his attitude. When they were still talking she asked, "Where are we going?" If, when, she escaped she wanted to be able to tell the police where she was taken. Then they can stop these people.
"Camp Torchlight. Another two miles. Honestly, ma'am, you're safer and less of a safety risk if you stay with us."
"I'm not so sure about that," she mumbled under her breath. She would have to remember that name.
Of course, "Camp Torchlight" was only the operational name of somewhere they would never reach."'Camp Torchlight'? Do you just recycle old names?"
"We thought it fitting. Passing you off to the next team, like passing the torch?"
"Letme guess: home is Olympia? Team coordinator is Hermes?"
"Well, we take after the best."
"I'm flattered, really."
The van slowed to turn into a parking garage. "We'll change vehicles here to evade pursuit."
Aria slapped her hand to her forehead and thought, of course it isn't real. they couldn't make it easy to know where they were going.Aria listened how the people were really trying to please Theodore and she wondered if they knew how hard that was going to be. Then she heard that they were going to change cars and she didn't even try to escape when they were led to another car. She walked in behind the others and sat back down sighing. She felt like she was never going to be able to go back to Clara and her old life. That is when she remembered that they were expecting her. They might think that she was missing. She said, "What about all of the people that were expecting us? They don't know where we went."
The van stopped (they hadn't gotten out yet). "That isn't my concern," Safety Net told her before opening the van door. He stopped out, rifle at the ready, and scanned the area, then called over his shoulder that the first floor was clear. The woman got out, her own rifle held casually in front of her, after beckoning Theodore and Aria follow. The van's engine died; the driver and Nexon both exited."The next vehicle-" Safety Net was interrupted by the screech of tires. A truck pulled into the garage haphazardly, parking sideways to block the exit. Its driver dropped out with a pistol; the man in the back immediately opened fire with his rifle. Safety Net grabbed Theodore's arm and jerked him down, then shoved him in the direction of the many nearby parked cars; the woman did the same with Aria while Nexon and their driver returned fire.
Aria was annoyed that he hadn't answered because it was important. Either way, she had to get out of the van and into the other. She watched how cautious they were and she wondered in the "enemies" were following them and if they really had to be this careful. As she stepped out of the van, she stretched and as she was standing back up she heard another car come and she looked toward it in time to see men step with guns. Aria felt herself be pulled to the ground and then shoved harshly toward some cars. She caught herself before she fell and moved even closer to the cars hoping that they would protect her from the onslaught of bullets from both sides.
