The Farm (working title - post-apocalyptic)

[Eleanor]

I am working on starting my stories with a Bang! Going straight in with some action. This is the opening scene of a new story that I am writing. I'd be grateful to anyone who could read it and tell me what they think: i.e. Does it grab your attention? Would you keep reading past this point? If not, why not? What could I do to make it better?

Thanks in advance. Here's the link: https://editor.reedsy.com/s/mMhbovD

[Eleanor]

Thomas wrote: "I like opening with a scene in which something is happening instead of opening with settings and intros. Well done.

I felt the word 'figure' was a bit overused. It is not a beautiful word when use..."

Thank you for the feedback. It's very helpful. I'll take your points on board when I go over this scene again. :)