Question J

[Jonetta]

Tracy and Dan’s efforts to get pregnant aren’t working so she consults a fertility specialist. She provides clarity as to why she was unwilling to consider adoption or an egg donor. What did you make of her perspective and her decision to take the fertility drugs?

[Sharon]

I understood. It is natural to want a child who is equal parts you and the person you love. Tracy and Dan are new to the idea of having kids together. I think Tracy was afraid to wait and talk to Dan. She feared that Dan would feel he had made the wrong decision to marry her.

Many couples take a long time to choose to adopt or use a donor. Dan and Tracy need time to wrap their head around not having a biological child and then decide if adopting is the right path for them.

[Robin]

I didn't like that Tracy opted to take the fertility drugs without talking to Dan about it. At least she should have told him as soon as she returned home from the doctor. I didn't like that she kept it a secret until he discovered it.

[Sandra]

I understand where Tracy was coming from whether it was right or wrong. It really got to her that she was the one with something "wrong" with her, especially after Dan had come home from his tests "locked & loaded". Tracy seems to have an issue with feeling inadequate at times even as good as she is at her job. I think she had to have time to deal with her feelings of failure as a woman, and the idea that she most likely would never have a biological child of her own.

[Jonetta]

At first I found her feelings about only considering a biological solution. But when she pointed out that she was the last in her family’s line, it all became clear.

I thought it was wrong that she didn’t tell Dan about the fertility drugs, too. But, she was honest about her feelings when he probed and he gets her. They really are good for each other.

[~Melissa~]

I didn't like that she didn't tell Dan when she got home. These two are usually so good about talking things out together that I was kind of surprised that she decided on her own. Then it did make sense when you hear her say the "locked & loaded" comment. You feel how much pressure she feels like she is under for 'getting' pregnant for them.