8. Improvements

[Manuel]

In what way(s) do you feel the book (plot, character development, etc.) could have been better?

Were there any parts of the book that were unclear? (For example, use of Japanese vocabulary, excessive historical information, etc.)

[Fonch]

I had liked more fidelity to the history, ocasionally die a lot of characters at the same time, and a list of characters historical and fictional would be very interesting. In case that there was a fictional character inspired in a Real character it would be good that it was said in whom was inspired. Speaking about positive things i liked really much Tomi. Some scenes reminded me to Braveheart or Christiad.

[SUSAN]

I would have liked much more historical information. Perhaps it would have been difficult to weave it into the plot.

[Fonch]

SUSAN wrote: "I would have liked much more historical information. Perhaps it would have been difficult to weave it into the plot."

I agree with Susan ocasionally the author is lost in the fiction, but i have liked. In my opinion this novel is platonic and not only for a conversation of the characters.

[Miki]

I think maybe there could be more internal conflict within the main character. He is pretty consistent from beginning to end. Maybe more struggle to reconcile his Christian beliefs with Japanese culture.

[Fonch]

Miki wrote: "I think maybe there could be more internal conflict within the main character. He is pretty consistent from beginning to end. Maybe more struggle to reconcile his Christian beliefs with Japanese cu..."

I admit that the main character is too perfect but i did not unplease i think that everybody needed good models and saints. The perfection is not either bad.

[Manuel]

Miki wrote: "I think maybe there could be more internal conflict within the main character. He is pretty consistent from beginning to end. Maybe more struggle to reconcile his Christian beliefs with Japanese culture."

I agree. Masaru's mentality is too mature since the beginning. His conversation with Lord Matsui in chapter 10 does not seem befitting for a boy of sixteen. He knows too much, and answers every argument and contention in the proper way.

[Fonch]

Manuel wrote: "Miki wrote: "I think maybe there could be more internal conflict within the main character. He is pretty consistent from beginning to end. Maybe more struggle to reconcile his Christian beliefs wit..."

I totally agree Masaru is too early. The Father Olivera is a good teacher. Masaru employed some arguments employed by Saint Justin and Tertullianus. I was thinking i do not know if my friend Alfonseca will remind in Pedrito de Andía this characrter created by the spanish writer Rafael Sánchez Mazas. This fictional character was also very worship.

[Florentius]

I agree. Masaru's mentality is too mature since the beginning. His conversation with Lord Matsui in chapter 10 does not seem befitting for a boy of sixteen. He knows too much, and answers every argument and contention in the proper way..."



Ah, there I disagree. I think we're dealing with cultural differences between the Japan of 400 years ago, and modern Western Civilization. Whereas today no one would expect a 16 year old to act and speak like that, I think it's not unreasonable to expect a mid-teen from the Edo period to do so. We tend to infantilize our young people today, whereas strong discipline and filial piety in Eastern cultures of centuries ago was de rigueur.

Shiro doesn't do everything perfectly. Recall how his conversation with Lord Matsui actually ends rather badly because Shiro brazenly oversteps the bounds of politeness.

[Fonch]

Florentius wrote: "I agree. Masaru's mentality is too mature since the beginning. His conversation with Lord Matsui in chapter 10 does not seem befitting for a boy of sixteen. He knows too much, and answers every arg..."

The apology is really good done. In my opinion the problem is Lord Mitsui although Lord Mitsui had had in front him to the same Chrysostumus i doubt hugely that he had persuaded for two reasons the power to the emperor over the particular person and second for the lustful and libertine nature of Lord Mitsui. Lord Mitsui it is a kind of japanese Pontius Pilatus, but it is really interesting that Florentius says about the role of young people in the modern age this role was changed by Rosseau and other historians wrote about the childhood in the ancient regime overall Philippe Aries. The childhood as we know is an invention of the Illustration of the 18th century even the Victorian age in the 19th century.

[Manuel]

Florentius wrote: "Ah, there I disagree. I think we're dealing with cultural differences between the Japan of 400 years ago, and modern Western Civilization. Whereas today no one would expect a 16 year old to act and speak like that, I think it's not unreasonable to expect a mid-teen from the Edo period to do so... "

I still disagree. It's not a question of culture, but of knowledge. Masaru appears as an expert in Christian Apologetics, which I'm sure he couldn't have been at his age and after having been a Catholic for just a little time.