First Chapter Swap for YA Fantasy - 8 Pages

[Lindy]

Hey there! Anyone interested in swapping first chapters? I’m planning to self-publish my YA fantasy, When Shadows Fall, and I need an opt-in for my newsletter subscribers. I was thinking of offering the first chapter of my book (plus probably entering new subscribers into some draws), and I want to make sure it is compelling enough to generate interest in the book.

I would love to get as much input as I can to see if the sample chapter does a good job at snaring the reader’s interest, how likely they would be to buy the book based on the first chapter, if they would feel more invested if the sample were shorter or longer, etc.

I’d be happy to read your first chapter in return, and provide whatever level of feedback suits you. (Prose, characters, world-building, etc.). I'm best suited for fantasy, but happy to try something new. If you are interested in swapping, leave a comment or send me a message!

Here is a blurb for my book:

“When the sun sets in Merak, it brings with it a terrifying change; a shadow world appears, filled with dangerous creatures that prowl the night enforcing the rule of a tyrant lord.

Traumatized by the past and terrified of the night, Ara’s only solace in life is the bond she shares with her brave younger sister. But when Lan is taken by shadow creatures, everything changes.

Refusing to accept a life without Lan, Ara sets out on a perilous journey to rescue her, with only the help of a mysterious boy to guide her. But the night is not what it seems, and the dark secrets concealed within its shadows run deeper than she ever dreamed. Only by unraveling them can Ara hope to save her sister–and herself–from a fate worse than death.”

Thank you!

-Lindy

[Penelope]

Hello :)
I’m happy to read your first chapter, I’ve also written a YA fantasy- Soul Fire. Don’t know which route of publishing I’m going down yet though. I’ve only written an outline of the blurb so please have an open mind.

‘Know your place, girl’
Luna chafes against the limits that are placed on her. Until one day it becomes too much and she breaks all of them.
When monsters begin to attack people from her icy village, she learns to fight.
Battling alongside her friends and family she must defeat the monsters. Before she is taken too.

Would you like to give my first chapter a go?

Thanks,

Penny

[Lindy]

Penelope wrote: "Hello :)
I’m happy to read your first chapter, I’ve also written a YA fantasy- Soul Fire. Don’t know which route of publishing I’m going down yet though. I’ve only written an outline of the blurb s..."

Hi Penny, I'd love to swap! I'll send you a message. :)

[Annie]

Hi Lindy,

I'm looking for the exact same thing. I recently revised my first chapter and I'd appreciate some feedback on how it reads. It's 12 pages, so I can read 4 extra pages of yours if you'd like haha.

Mine is also a YA fantasy. Hope to hear from you! :)

"Aisling Bordeleau’s inherited necromancy has cost her everything. It is why her family live as exiled pirates, and without the aid of their sentient, Fae-enchanted ship that keeps the monsters at bay, she would have been killed a long time ago. So when Aisling attempts to summon her dead father to solve his murder, her dearest friend and fellow necromancer, Lochlann, warns against it.

He is right. When her disastrous ritual concludes, Aisling not only conjures an unknown, vengeful demon, but both Lochlann and the creature disappear inside a golden contraption. Heavy with guilt, Aisling knows where they are. Hidden behind the Clockwork Wall lies Spindlemere, the elusive city of alchemists who view necromancy as the height of sacrilege - and they will execute Lochlann for her mistake."

[Lindy]

Annie wrote: "Hi Lindy,

I'm looking for the exact same thing. I recently revised my first chapter and I'd appreciate some feedback on how it reads. It's 12 pages, so I can read 4 extra pages of yours if you'd l..."

Hi Annie! A swap would be great! And 12 pages is no problem, haha. I will send you a message. :)

Edit: Looks like I can't send you a private message! If you want to send your chapter to lenns@hotmail.ca that would be great, I will send you mine once I've gotten your email address. :)

-Lindy

[Annie]

Lindy wrote: "Annie wrote: "Hi Lindy,

I'm looking for the exact same thing. I recently revised my first chapter and I'd appreciate some feedback on how it reads. It's 12 pages, so I can read 4 extra pages of yo..."

Great! I just send you an email. Please let me know if you haven't gotten it. Cheers!