Let Me Tell You About a Man I Knew - Buddy Read

[Lori]

A little more:

[Lori]

(view spoiler)[ This wind, the mistral, has ushered in so many changes in Jeanne’s life. It’s almost a character in the story for me. I do love this kind of device in storytelling. It actually reminds me of the sly wind in the movie, Chocolat, which also takes place in France. I think the sly wind in the movie is the very same wind from the north used here. (hide spoiler)]

[Lori]

(view spoiler)[ By nature, Jeanne has a boldness of spirit which makes her unique for her time. But her boldness has been dormant for a very long time. Something about the presence of Van Gogh has stirred something in her soul and she’s waking up. I have my hopes set on a renewed Jeanne, perhaps with the help of a nice gust of wind? (hide spoiler)]

[Terry]

Sara, so glad you are out of hot water!

[Candi]

Ladies, I've also read through Chapter 10! I wanted to drop by and post some comments, but I've got several teens over in the pool following junior prom and it seems my brain just can't process any coherent thoughts right now lol. I will say that I'm completely wrapped up in the story!

[Sara, New School Classics]

Thanks, Terry.

Candi - Rites of passage! Hope you enjoyed the kids and that they enjoyed the prom.

The second half of this book becomes marvelous! I have cried more than once.

[Sara, New School Classics]

Chapters Eleven-Twelve: (view spoiler)[ How sad that Jeanne wants to be painted so badly because she wants to be seen. What could be worse than feeling that you are in a marriage and your partner doesn't even see you there.

This man who knows, instinctively, when a window is open but who can't hear his wife's quickened heart at this moment, or feel the anger that's rising up from her, or smell the turpentine. (hide spoiler)]

[Candi]

Sara wrote: "Thanks, Terry.

Candi - Rites of passage! Hope you enjoyed the kids and that they enjoyed the prom.

The second half of this book becomes marvelous! I have cried more than once."

Oh, prom was a delight! I have so many lovely pictures of the kids down by the lakefront. They "allowed" parents to go and snap some shots beforehand :)

I read some more of this on my way back and forth to another event today, lol. Sneaking it in when I can ;) I have gulped down a few tears myself up to the point Sara is at as well.

[Lori]

Sara: Your Chapter 10-12 comment: (view spoiler)[ I agree with your thoughts and love your quote. It must have been so lonely for Jeanne not having her friend to talk to, her boys gone, and on top of all that her relationship with Charles being what it was. The other women aren’t an option for Jeanne with their merciless gossiping. I’m glad Jeanne doesn’t feed their curiosities but they only seem to provide rumors and judgments, not true friendship. - (hide spoiler)]

[Lori]

Candi: It sounds like prom was a big success. Treasure those memories and your snapshots!! 🥰

[Lori]

Yesterday provided a lot of unexpected reading time. I woke up with a swollen left foot, probably gout, and the stress fracture in my right foot isn’t quite healed. So, I’m almost finished reading but I’m going to go back and read favorite chapters again.

[Sara, New School Classics]

Lori, so sorry you are having the foot problems. Goodness, you have had a real trial with that stress fracture!

I finished the book but will collect my thoughts and post them later today. I did end up loving this book.

[Sara, New School Classics]

The ending of this book was a huge surprise for me. (view spoiler)[I hardly expected to feel any sympathy or understanding for Charles, and yet Fletcher turned my image of him around completely. I was glad Jeanne was able to persist in breaking through to him, and even she understood more of the why after he finally opened up about the war.

I have often wondered if we can really, truly know any other person completely. Even the things that happened and how Charles was feeling when he came courting were misconceptions for Jeanne. If she had known he came to her of his own accord, for love, and not because he wanted to have a woman to produce his offspring, it would have made her approach to him very different and her view of her own life as well. If he had told her why he was pulling the beds apart, wouldn't that have made the act seem more like an act of love than of rejection? It made me sad to think of all the years they had already lived at cross-purposes.

I loved the chapters about Jeanne's father and her caring for him. One of the things that made living with Charles, who was so closed off and dictatorial, so difficult, was that she had experienced so much love and given so much permission to dream from her father. I believe the love he bore for her mother seemed something out of reach in her own marriage, but hard to live without since she knew such love could exist.

I was glad Benoit came home. I think both Jeanne and Charles needed that. I was also glad that it was clear that they knew he would go again. He wasn't trapped there, taking care of them, or the patients, or the grounds. He would still follow his dreams, which would take him away; but the fact that he had come home was a testament to the fact that he would still be a part of their lives, regardless.

Of course, we all knew how Vincent would end, but that made me sad anyway. The portrait that is painted of him here, trying to overcome medical issues that simply cannot be cured, is an accurate one, I think. One of the poignant questions in life is whether, without the suffering, there would have been the art. So much of his turmoil comes across in his paintings, so much of his searching. If he had been a happy man, would he have painted much different paintings? I think the answer is yes. Then the question becomes whether it is ever worthwhile for anyone to suffer so much so that they can leave behind them something so precious to so many. Thank God for his sister-in-law, Jo, who made sure he was seen by the world and appreciated at last. (hide spoiler)]

Cannot wait to hear all your thoughts on this read. Thank you so much Terry, Lori, and Candi, for reading it with me.

My review:

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...

[Terry]

Candi, after reading your post about the teens and junior prom, we had dinner last night with my daughter and her husband. She’s in her mid 30s now, but I well remember those proms and taking pictures of her all dressed up in the garden. Soon after, she was off to college and making her own life, then starting her own family. The years have gone by fast. Those last years at home are precious.

My husband and I went through an adjustment when she was away, but I think my adjustment was easier than Jeanne’s because I had a professional career that I could concentrate on. Still, I could relate to that feeling of how empty the house could feel.

In my case, my daughter came back for awhile after college and before really getting out on her own. That, too, was a blessing.

[Terry]

Lori, so sorry about your troubles with your foot and leg. I myself need knee surgery, so I know what it is like to feel completely hobbled. I hope you are better soon.

[Lori]

Terry: Thank you, that’s very kind. Any type of pain or injury that disrupts the mechanics of getting around are the worst for me. But, I know I’m not the only one living through this kind of challenge. I keep telling myself, “this too shall pass”.

[Sara, New School Classics]

Terry--It is nice that you had your daughter back home between college and total independence (although I remember my mother telling me there was no such thing as the latter). I think an empty nest would be difficult in any circumstances, but extra hard if your relationship with your spouse was as strained as Jeanne's. Women today are blessed with having other pursuits than just keeping house and raising children, but I can easily imagine the lack of purpose one would feel in that case--again, my mother, who never complained, but must have felt bereft when the last child left and she was alone in the silence after all the years of children's noises filling up her house.

[Lori]

Sara, your thoughts on the ending: (view spoiler)[ are much in line with my own. I was completely surprised by the ending but pleased by it too. My heart ached for Jeanne and the years that slipped by for her and Charles that weren’t what they could have been. I guess better late than never, right?

I think my favorite quote from the book is this: “The heart, she thinks, is the painter. Love, and moments like this, are the art. The Dutchman taught her that.’

There is so much to ponder in this little book. Love and loss, friendship, change, illness. I’m still trying to decide if this all began by something as simple as wanting to see or be seen? Was the mistral the catalyst for the changes in Jeanne’s life? The biggest and most powerful change in her life, in my opinion, was brought about by her interaction with Van Gogh. I think Van Gogh inspired Jeanne to want more, I think he reminded her of who she had been once, what life could have been.

Ultimately, I am satisfied with Jeanne coming full circle, being restored to her former self and a more fulfilling relationship with her husband. I loved that Charles and Jeanne were able to bring so much tenderness into their lives after do many years of separateness. Gosh, I suddenly wish I could go outside and turn cartwheels, lol!

I love Fletcher, so I am uncertain about my reluctance to give it all five stars. I recently read one of her other books which seemed more magical, and maybe more lyrical, perhaps that’s the reason. I suppose I will still be thinking about this story all week. Van Gogh is going to haunt me for some time to come. I’m glad to have something of his story to cling to, makes him less of a museum piece and more flesh and blood. (hide spoiler)]

[Sara, New School Classics]

I had the same star dilemma, Lori. If I weren't comparing it to other books she has written, I might not be stingy about that 5th star. I might have to go back and change the rating anyway. The more I think about this book, the more I realize I took away from it and the more awed I am by how much she said about life while seeming to just tell a simple tale of an individual woman's experiences.

LOVE everything you have said. (view spoiler)[The biggest and most powerful change in her life, in my opinion, was brought about by her interaction with Van Gogh. I think Van Gogh inspired Jeanne to want more, I think he reminded her of who she had been once, what life could have been. Perfect! And she reminded him that he could be accepted for who he was, as just a person and not a madman. Charles was afraid she would make Vincent worse, but I think she was the main reason he got better for a time.

I still think about her other books that I have read from time to time. I don't think this one is going to be an exception. (hide spoiler)]

[Lori]

Sara: I bet if I had read this book before Witch Light and The Silver Dark Sea, I would have felt like it garnered 5 stars. I definitely fell into the trap of comparing it to her other offerings. Anyway, I have been known to change my ratings from time to time.

[Terry]

I also have it four stars, moving it up from where I would have predicted at the start.

[Candi]

I've finished! I neglected a few things this evening in order to move along. I just had to keep reading :)

(view spoiler)[I too was surprised at the change in Charles. Well, it wasn't so much of a change as an understanding of one another. It's amazing to me that it is so hard for couples/people in general to communicate their true feelings properly with one another. The damage it can do to a relationship. The misunderstandings. Sometimes it seems it should be so easy to just talk, but this really isn't how the world works, is it?! Sometimes a catalyst is needed. In this case it was van Gogh and the inspiration he provided to Jeanne. Art and books can do such things, can't they? More people should partake ;) Susan Fletcher cites her idea for the book being based on letters between van Gogh and his brother. I'd love to read some of those. van Gogh was fascinating to me before, but now I feel as if I understand him better through Jeanne's eyes.

Lori, that quote you note is a favorite is mine as well! I also liked the thoughts on what it means to be painted and truly seen by someone.

The fact that Jeanne finally made it to Paris and met her grandson made me smile. I love that she stood 'in a room that's new to her. From its window, a new view.' Her life is not stagnant. She has made something of it by renewing her life with Charles and with these young people in her life once more :) (hide spoiler)]

I have to give this 5 stars. I still believe Corrag is my favorite, but when I compare this book to others I've rated 4 stars, it doesn't seem like they are equivalent. This one made me feel so much more and those are the ones that garner all the stars from me!

[Candi]

Terry, your point about those last years at home being precious is well taken! I keep reminding myself of this nearly every day! Finding something of one's own after children have moved on is very important, I think. My mother lived solely for me and my sister. She didn't have a career. She didn't have any hobbies to speak of. Few friends nearby. To this day, she seems very unhappy most of the time. Our lives have become so busy that we can't provide her with all the time she needs to feel fulfilled on a daily basis. She is still married and with my father. But it's not enough for her. She kept me and my sister close by and she keeps encouraging me to do the same with my children. I, like Jeanne, want them to go off and live their dreams, however :) It's something I debate with her on a regular basis when the topic of the kids and college and futures come into discussion!

[Terry]

Candi, I remember reading Gibran as a teenager, who said something like this: Your children are not your own. It’s a parent’s job to launch their children successfully into the world. It is their job to separate, too. And it is a hard job for both, but I think especially hard for mothers who haven’t much else to interest them. If you are encouraging your children to be independent, then I think you are bring a fabulous mom!

[Sara, New School Classics]

I agree, Candi. Hardest part of loving someone is letting go when you need to. It makes for strong and capable adults, though, and they will thank you later.

[Lori]

Candi: I couldn’t put this book down either as I neared the end. Loved your thoughts and absolutely yes, more people should partake of reading and art!

[Candi]

Terry wrote: "Candi, I remember reading Gibran as a teenager, who said something like this: Your children are not your own. It’s a parent’s job to launch their children successfully into the world. It is their j..."

I think Gibran is correct in many ways, Terry! Thanks for your words of encouragement. We've been planning college visits just this morning!

[Candi]

Sara, I've noticed that it's taken me a lot longer to feel like an independent adult as I listened to so much of what my mother told me when I was a teen and a young adult. She instilled a fear of both angering her and in trying new things. It has taken me a long time to get past both of those things and it's something I absolutely refuse to do to my own children. When Charles seemed angry at Benoit leaving, it seemed so familiar to me! And made me mad!

[Candi]

Lori wrote: "Candi: I couldn’t put this book down either as I neared the end. Loved your thoughts and absolutely yes, more people should partake of reading and art!"

Lori, I'm already thinking about which Fletcher book to read next! I feel like I haven't spent enough time with her yet! :) :)

[Sara, New School Classics]

After several days in which this book has haunted my mind, I have revised my rating to the full 5-stars.

I will also keep reading Fletcher, Candi. I felt so proud of Jeanne for letting Benoit go...she had so much more to lose in losing him than Charles did. The later explanation eased my feeling toward Charles, but it did not erase it. You put your children first. I expect people like your mother never quite get that it is a greater love sometimes to let go.

[Candi]

Sara, Fletcher's magic does it again :) :) I find it difficult to get her books out of my mind.

[Lori]

Sara, anytime you want to read one of Fletcher’s creations just let me know! Thanks again for the invitation! 🥰

[Lori]

Terry: I’ve added you to my prayer list. I’ll be thinking about you and hoping you get your knee taken care of. It was lovely talking to you again.

[Terry]

Lori, thank you so much!