Play Book Tag discussion
Footnotes
>
Quarantine Tuesday Reading Kaffeeklatsch: 4/21/2020
Things here in Clarkston Michigan are about the same. Taking it one day at a time, just wishing the weather would get better. It snowed again last night.My local Farmers Market did on-line ordering last week and then a drive through to pick up! I was so excited. It was the first time I got out (even though just in the car), the first time I was out of pajama pants and wore underwear and shoes-🤣. It's the little things like fresh ingredients, and having a choice of clean undies to wear!
@Theresa, so glad you are thinking ahead and being smart about when you can go back to a daily commute. So many are just not using their heads. As devastating as our current situation has become, it will be worse if a second wave is allowed to take hold. I love your Governor. I flip on my TV, mute it until his briefing starts then listen as I do some chore. It is the only news I watch.
I loved the essay, Theresa, thanks for sharing.
@Theresa, I can relate to so much of what you said. I too am now working from home out of my bedroom (with bright green walls which I hate and should have painted years ago). I know that I am fortunate to be able to do this, but like you, feel that working from home has its downside. My joke is that I like my new commute! I have always enjoyed my quiet, down time. However, despite being here with my husband, I'm feeling isolated and this bothers me. My friends and I are keeping up with each other through phone calls.
I read the article and think it speaks to many of us.
Theresa wrote: "Oh, I did take advantage of the free streaming of the 25th Anniversary Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall in 2011 on Friday night! Sigh, what a glorious wallow!"Is this still available? I LOVE Phantom of the Opera ;P
I haven't checked this out yet, but you can stream free Globe Theater Shakespeare productions from the past... currently Romeo & Juliet. I plan on checking that out.
I was feeling really anxious yesterday, still a little today. Just been trapped in the house too much and feel so disconnected. Trying to focus more today on my work and self-care so hopefully that will help. I feel completely unmotivated :(
@Joanne, local farmer's market online is a great idea!! I wonder if my city is doing that... I'll have to check.
@Joanne, Ohio's weather is much like yours. Spring is taking her good old time to come. Every now and then we catch a warmer day (55 degrees and sunny). When it's warmer, do you plan on taking any walks or hikes? That's something I really enjoy. The animals I'm seeing now in the parks close to where we live are dogs!@ Meli, I've started to check out Netflix. Being at home so much has been boring. The 4 walls are getting to me. I think when the weather breaks, it will get better.
I am fortunate that although I live in a city, my part of town has many green spaces that are not crowded, so I can get out and walk whenever the weather is nice. If other people are out, we can get far enough away from each other. Also I am determined that this will finally be the year that I won't let my yard be overrun by weeds, tree seedlings, etc. since I am here all the time and have no excuse. Some of my friends are really enjoying gardening but for me it is just a chore. I use it as time to listen to audiobooks.I am only getting groceries by car pickup where I don't even have to open my window. I may need to return to my daughter 6 hours away depending on a cancer test she is having Friday. So aside from my own health, I am super conscious of not passing anything to her. Besides, the more I read of symptoms people experienced with the "mild" form of the illness, the more I want to avoid it! Plus concerns about residual effects.
I have thought of Netflix but regularly watch 2 hours of news shows every evening plus the late-night comedy shows and things on PBS. It seems like every time my husband sits down to watch something, he falls asleep!
Holly R W wrote: "@Joanne, Ohio's weather is much like yours. Spring is taking her good old time to come. Every now and then we catch a warmer day (55 degrees and sunny). When it's warmer, do you plan on taking any ..."And it is supposed to be up to 70 tomorrow (in Indiana) so I am looking forward to being outside. Maybe work on my porch :)
For Netflix, I highly recommend Atypical. I binged it in like almost 1 full day!
I've been doing really well for the most part, with some moments here and there that have been tough. Yesterday was a tough day. After my four patients, I just was feeling down anyway - and before I knew it, we were all negative and fighting, and it was hard to recover. I think whats hardest for me is that I just want to see signs that we are flattening the curve, and that there is hope for getting through this. Between the crazy protesters, and folks opening up beaches and gyms and salons, (and bowling alleys) and seeing how this is just going to prolong things for the rest of us - its tough. Because I want and need my kids to get their life back. And I need my husband back, who has become a bastion of anxiety and negativity over this crisis. On top of that, Massachusetts continues to surge. Worse and Worse all the time. And yet, everything here is closed, and everyone I know is social distancing. i keep wondering, where are these astronomical numbers coming from? Is it the healthcare front line workers? The grocery, postal, and amazon? Or is it just ripping through the nursing homes and senior living like wild fire? Or is that just because there is so much more testing, and young people here for the schools, that we have a lot more knowledge about the positives, the mild cases, the asymptomatic.... I feel extremely connected across the local, state, and country, and so is my husband, my friends, and all my patients. We all have huge networks. Many of the people I know, know no one, or know it a degree or two away, and I myself know a bunch of people who have lost parents, or who have been sick and are recovering. But over half of them are in the tri-state area. I know of less than six people who have had it here, and two are our elderly neighbors who moved to senior living a year and a half ago. And my patient's mother in law in senior living. My supervisee and his wife are recovering, and another patient's brother and sister. i now people who think they had a light or mild version of this - and therefore consider themselves part of the growing herd immunity. But the fact that Massachusetts cannot get under control confuses me, and makes me crazy. I did hear there is a hot spot in Chelsea, where low income and minority folks are having trouble containing it, and I think that has to do with folks being forced to work. So lack of an actual plan (at least on the federal level) and no real knowledge about how to proceed is making things really hard. And I spend all day talking with others who are feeling this bad for all kinds of reasons. Everyone wants to get through this with more speed, but safely. No one I know wants to re-open the economy anytime soon, and even if they do, no one will go. No one will head anywhere. Anyway, most of the time I am pretty upbeat and joyful - I have many reasons to be grateful and feel blessed. I just admit I had a moment. And there is just one thing at the root of it. Our special summer camp. My kids have accepted the lack of friends, school, sports, cancelled tests for college, and the interruption to the college process, And they have been so so good. The only thing they want, which is in danger, is to go to camp this summer. Plus our beloved dog is dying. And the more things continue to worsen, and fail to decline, the more hard this is. Both my older kids came to me separately on Sunday crying over whether camp will happen. They are not stupid. And my husband who spends 24/7 listening to the news is doom and gloom all the time. i just need to believe there is a possibility some version of camp might happen - and they are preparing to open, as long as the CDC says yes. Honestly, that's the one thing that breaks my heart. And the one thing that makes me lose it big. Camp. So I want to see Massachusetts figure it out, and get on the plan with everyone else. And see the world get safely through this. I am otherwise doing just fine. I am pleased that my ability to be there for others is part of the solution. I do feel the spiritual reset in everyone's lives. I see how many things are difficult, but I also believe we come through this wiser, stronger, more connected to ourselves and one another. That we take a look a consumership in a multitude of areas that wasn't working. That we change ourselves as a community, a national and world community. There have been many gains, and I do think a deeper appreciation is happening. Many people are finding upsides, myself and my family included. Though the weight add and exercise loss is a sacrifice to this time for sure. But one thing - we found out about our young dog dying (she's just six!) the day the schools closed March 12th. But we are spending a lot of time with her, and I really think that is extending her life. Its been really nice for the five or us to have this time with the dog. There's a new puppy coming into our family, to be born in this next nine ten days, and will come home to us in June! Please pray for the world, but for the small sliver that is for us, please please pray that the birth of the new puppy ushers in the decline slope of the curve. That some version of Camp happens, that my eldest son actually does well on the ACT in July and the SAT in August. That my parents stay safe, and that we all can reclaim our lives a little stronger. And that when we are saying goodbye to our beloved Dandy, that we are looking at a world that offers new fresh opportunity for connection, experience, and love.
Thanks for listening.... Love to all, Amy
Meli wrote: "Holly R W wrote: "@Joanne, Ohio's weather is much like yours. Spring is taking her good old time to come. Every now and then we catch a warmer day (55 degrees and sunny). When it's warmer, do you p..."70 degrees sounds wonderful! ... My husband is hooked on "Atypical" and loves it.
Well, I've been retired for nearly three years now, so this was less of a change for me than for those who are still working. Still, I really do miss the socializing ... and just going out to meet a girlfriend for lunch. One of my friends is going to try to set up a "zoom" lunch for us this week. We've talked and/or emailed every couple of days, but we miss seeing one another. She lost her husband last year, so this is really isolating for her.
I also admit to having a "coronavirus symptoms?" attack every 10 days or so. Yesterday I was complaining about a scratchy throat and stuffy nose. I kept feeling my forehead to see if I had a fever and eventually actually took my temp (totally normal). Hubby declared, "You do NOT have the virus!" This morning I used my Flonase (I just hate using it) as well as taking the claritin ... and voila, symptoms gone. So clearly it's allergies.
Intellectually I know that the likelihood is that my symptoms are allergies, but emotionally I seem to go to the dark place immediately. (It's the same as our financial situation ... intellectually I know I'm in a good position in retirement, but emotionally I still fear being a bag lady eating cat food from the dumpster.)
One good news story this week is that a friend of a friend's husband had COVID and was in the hospital for 24 days, 20 of those on a ventilator, and he was released to go home this week. I don't even know him personally but when I saw the picture of his wife and kids picking him up from the hospital I started bawling. I wish more cases of this horrible disease would end like this.
Allergy season is upon us so there will be a lot of people fearing they got coronavirus. We might be heading back into the office in 2 weeks, which seems silly since we are clearly working from home successfully and have no reason AT ALL to go into the office except to satisfy some meaningless type of professional vanity which I hate.
Like Amy, I am kinda on a roller coaster of emotions varying from grateful for being employed, healthy, etc to being angry, confused and generally down. And also confusion over what the situation is overall. Is it getting better? No one seems to know what the hell is going on, which how could they when it's not something you can really know since there are so many people not tested and still people out and about in some for or another.
But for the most part I am hanging in there.
@Rachel, that's great news for him and his family!
There are still a lot of people (especially those dumbass protesters) who don't realize how serious this is.
Holly R W wrote: "@Joanne, Ohio's weather is much like yours. Spring is taking her good old time to come. Every now and then we catch a warmer day (55 degrees and sunny). When it's warmer, do you plan on taking any ..."Holly, I wold love to get out and walk, we have a lot of great parks around me. However, because of the mass quantity of titanium in my back the weather has to be cooperative, or I don't do very well.
Book Concierge wrote: "Well, I've been retired for nearly three years now, so this was less of a change for me than for those who are still working. Still, I really do miss the socializing ... and just going out to meet ..."You are not alone, going to that dark place over scratchy throat, runny nose. I knew immediately it was allergies, but still I was freaked out and took my temp every morning for days....
Rachel N. wrote: "One good news story this week is that a friend of a friend's husband had COVID and was in the hospital for 24 days, 20 of those on a ventilator, and he was released to go home this week. I don't ev..."Nice to hear Rachel...20 days on a vent, WOW ! That alone would have caused me panic-the longer you are on one, the least likely to come off. So CHEERS to this man who made it CHEERS!
Amy wrote: "I've been doing really well for the most part, with some moments here and there that have been tough. Yesterday was a tough day. After my four patients, I just was feeling down anyway - and before ..."Amy, Michigan is in the same boat...I will add summer camp and all the other things to my nightly ritual of talking to myself about what needs to happen for someone ANYONE to have some joy!
Schools closed in MA for the rest of the year. Scott told me and I yelled at him for gleefully reveling in negativity! I’m sure that was helpful - lol! Friends, I’m losing it!
I also watched the Royal Albert Hall Phantom of the Opera showing this weekend. Absolutely wonderful, Sierra Boggess is a wonder. It is no longer available, but this weekend they will be showing the sequel 'Love Never Dies' for the weekend, and of course, I'll be watching that as well. Also add me to the 'Atypical' love list! The seasons are too short! I've recently started 'Schitts Creek', and am LOVING IT!
Still don't know anyone with COVID, which is a good thing. Hubby and I are still working, and considered essential. I spend the first 30-60 minutes of my shift cleaning. I also started my flonase/allergy regimen this week, in preparation for allergies. Lucky/unlucky me, I've had allergies for about 8 years, so I can see the signs and symptoms a mile away and don't confuse it with COVID. We are still going on hikes and walking daily. I'm also still doing daily yoga. Trying to get 10,000 steps in without the gym.
Another thought- our restaurant vendors (meat and produce) are doing contactless pickups for individuals and families. These companies normally only sell to restaurants, but with the lowered demand from restaurants and high demand from consumers they are doing produce boxes, meet boxes, dock sales. Might be worth searching your local purveyors and seeing what they have to offer. There are great deals to be had!
Here's this weeks episode of Some Good News:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQLi2...
Again, get your tissues ready.
Joi wrote: "Here's this weeks episode of Some Good News:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQLi2...
Again, get your tissues ready. ..."
That was so much fun!
Theresa, thank you so much for continuing to do this and your wonderful article.Let's all arrive. Just take some deep breaths and when we are safely arrive we will slowly unfurl like flowers in the spring. We will have press the reset button to our priorities.
This is truly a time to reflect and re-energize.
On a personal level, I am still "working from home" and mighty sick of on line training. The one I took today, had a quiz which asked the names of chapters in the book. How is this important? But I got my certificate that proved I spent x number of hours working on the training. But how can I complain, when I am working and getting paid.
I continue to do a bit of gardening, which is gratifying.
As for tv I have discovered an old HBO series Treme, set in New Orleans after Katrina. Wonderful story and characters and the music is so good as well as the food looking scrumptious.
Tonight those is The Voice, I watch it recorded one day late.
Spend altogether too much time on facebook incredulous that we have a chief executive who is irresponsibly fomenting insurrection against our state governors who are doing outstanding jobs. I should stay off it, but it helps and makes me crazy at the same time.
Amy wrote: "Schools closed in MA for the rest of the year. Scott told me and I yelled at him for gleefully reveling in negativity! I’m sure that was helpful - lol! Friends, I’m losing it!"Yes, I just heard this today and am feeling your pain even though my kids are past that stage. Being forced to homeschool kids for so long is really not a good thing and I am saying this as a huge fan of homeschooling (but when it's because it is a family's choice) since all of my kids benefitted a great deal from their years at home before moving to brick and mortar school when they were ready (plus wanted it).
Booknblues wrote: " I should stay off it, but it helps and makes me crazy at the same time.Right there with you BnB, as far as the FB -Even when I try to stay neutral, I end getting in trouble🤨
Robin wrote: "Some of my friends are really enjoying gardening but for me it is just a chore. I use it as time to listen to audiobooks...."*hand goes up... me too... (chore and audio)
Oh Amy, so sorry to hear about your ups and downs esp the summer camp. My kids were "lifers" at their camp and I know how looking forward to camp got them through the school year. Being in NY, I know how hard it can be to see the numbers climbing higher and higher every day. They will come down, and I know you know this. Hope we get some warmer days, some outdoor time in the sunshine will lift everyone's spirits. Stay strong!
My husband is having a hard time because his main joy in life is making music with other people. Not only is everything canceled but choirs (he is in 4!) will be one of the last things to return. There was a horrible incident in Washington state before the lockdowns where most of a choir got sick after rehearsing together and several died. Also my husband had finally found an exercise program that works for him, which was exercising with a trainer in a pool. His back bothers him too much for any on-land exercise. But he can't do that from home, whereas I have been able to do online exercise classes. Not to get too political, but it only seems fair that anyone protesting against stay-at-home orders should sign a statement saying they waive all their rights to medical care. Here in Wisconsin, the governor refused to give a permit to a gathering coming up. Without a permit, they can't rent "port-a-potties". So that should be interesting.
Robin wrote: "My husband is having a hard time because his main joy in life is making music with other people. Not only is everything canceled but choirs (he is in 4!) will be one of the last things to return. T..."I can empathize! And it has been proven that singing is really good for mental health and well being, particularly singing in a group. My daughter can't play her tenor sax at church, I can't sing where I like to sing and my son, who is a music performance major, really misses all of his school ensembles and group music classes. Due to lag, they can't play together online, either.
Meli wrote: "Theresa wrote: "Oh, I did take advantage of the free streaming of the 25th Anniversary Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall in 2011 on Friday night! Sigh, what a glorious wallow!"Is this..."
Meli - Phantom was running free from 48 hours from UK 7pm starting Friday night. But you can rent it from that site to watch for about $4 I think. The special annuversary encores were the best as all the British Phantoms to 2011 took the stage, including the one true Phantom without whom the show would never have taken off - Michael Crawford!
Joanne wrote: "Things here in Clarkston Michigan are about the same. Taking it one day at a time, just wishing the weather would get better. It snowed again last night.My local Farmers Market did on-line orderi..."
A friend in PA has something similar. Also with a local cattle ranch for meat!
Robin wrote: "Some of my friends are really enjoying gardening but for me it is just a chore. ..."We are soul mates! I do not get the pleasure anyone could possibly get from grubbing in the dirt! I do enjoy the end results...beauty, flowers, produce. But just let me be the appreciative audience!
[I am sure you all remember I am a farm kid. I blame too much exposure to yard work and gardening at a tender age - birth to 18. Note I live in an apartment in NYC. I only have plants at my office!]
Rachel N. wrote: "One good news story this week is that a friend of a friend's husband had COVID and was in the hospital for 24 days, 20 of those on a ventilator, and he was released to go home this week. I don't ev..."I had a very long day, starting with an early CLE webinar I needed to renew my license to practice law and ending with an evening meeting (call in not zoom thank goodness), then a call with a high risk friend who has not been checking in recently (she is fine and promised to check in with me regularly, but knows I am busy and did not want to bother me! Grrrr...).
I am glad so many are happy to have this forum! I know it does me a lot of good.
@ those missing singing in a choir... I have friends joining zoom choirs, many of them professionals. All are saying good things about it after a rough start. Of course, whoever is sharing your home with you has to be tolerant! Here is a link (I hope!) to a video of one made up of US and German church choir professionals singing together via zoom (Karin - my friend Carla Reilly Bond is in it, center leaning mostly out of the screen) https://m.facebook.com/story.php?stor....
@Amy - a friend with a sports mad 9 yo is praying for summer camp too! As she says "he needs a baseball game. Bad."
Here us what my daily email update from Gov. Andy said earlier this evening: "The number of hospitalizations continue to fall. Yesterday, total hospitalizations fell to 16,076, the eighth straight day of declines. Notwithstanding this encouraging trend, infections remain high and the virus is still spreading." Every where in US other than Washington State is behind NY. Keep the faith. If NY, especially NYC, can see a flattening, it's working and you will see it improve too.
BTW Gov Andy's daily update emails are a high point of my day and curiously soothing. He tells the bad but also the good and includes words of encouragement. Anyone can sign up for them: https://www.governor.ny.gov/content/g.... You can unsubscribe at any time. Join me!
@Rachel N - what awesome news! My meeting tonight included the client hospitalized with COVID19 for 12 days in mid March, before numbers started to climb. He is now well enough to be able to donate his plasma rich with the specific antibodies and he will do so as often as they will let him to 'give back'. Meanwhile, my sister who is in healthcare at a hospital upstate NY shared this from her hospital (you might want a tissue in hand): https://m.facebook.com/story.php?stor...
I will end with a little story. I spent a full day happily at my 'real' office, and even managed to buy TP on my way home at a local chain drugstore. I was pretty pleased with myself and my day, tired but ok emotionally. Then I noticed something: I had left something very important, that I need to work, sitting on my desk. Yup...now I have to go in to my 'real' office again to get it. Upset at the inconvenience but not so secretly happy to head back there.
Could I have subconsciously staged this? It is possible.
Oh we all have a crush on Andy! Love the Randy Rainbow latest!We too are fans and feel comforted. I do know we are supposedly two weeks behind NY and California, it just feels like the days are coming closer and closer to Camp. We have a hell of a lot of new Yorkers, and New Jersey who go there. But its literally on the NY MA line, but based in Massachusetts and such thoughts of this just send me into a tailspin. This special place where the motto is "ten months waiting for two", and where my kids feel their best friends on earth are, and where they can truly be themselves. Its where my kids find themselves most deeply spiritual. Now Soccer, and Flag Football, and Baseball, and Track is a deep loss. But again, Camp (and the dog( is the most heartbreaking. Meanwhile, these kids have been in pretty good spirits. So have we. Gratitude prevails for everything we are gaining from this time, and for the kind of connectedness and evolution that comes from the immense suffering of this time. Sending you all much love- Amy
Whoops - forgot why I meant to respond, and it had nothing to do with Covid, the East Coast, and Camp. I was thinking about Robin's hubby. I too sing in three choirs, and I miss the singing and my choir friends terribly. I cannot wait to sing again when the world gets back to normal. But one thing I love is the incredible artistry and harmony that has come out of this time. Our favorite artists singing every single day on facebook. People singing from their homes, from churches and synagogues, and from Broadway! Have to say how much I absolutely cherish that piece of this time. The beautiful holy music of solidarity, out of windows and on streets. I miss it and am totally loving it.....
Darn it, I am so far behind again! @Joi, I also started Schitt's Creek after Atypical was over :)
Love it.
I'll have to search for the Phantom of the Opera stream... too bad I missed it for free.
Theresa wrote: "Robin wrote: "Some of my friends are really enjoying gardening but for me it is just a chore. ..."We are soul mates! I do not get the pleasure anyone could possibly get from grubbing in the dirt!..."
Me too, Theresa, about having enough of the farm. I tell people I don't enjoy camping because I grew up with dirt, bugs and unreliable plumbing, so I don't need to travel to enjoy it!
Hi everyone,I still really like this forum! It so helps to hear that many people around the world have similar concerns at the same time. This week I didn't really feel like sharing much.
It's ups and downs psychologically with me in the last week or so.
I had a tough day today, but then I got a package this afternoon. I opened it and my parents had sent me a flower bouquet. No reason, just to say they love me. So my day got much better! It's good to be reminded of that.
I am back in my appartment alone, not at my husband's anymore, because school has partly re-started .
Only for students in the final year of high school, because they will have final exams in May. Each day only a certain number of classes meet up to talk about their individual studies and problems and concerns and exam preparations. There are a lot of rules to be followed by them and by their teachers (strict seating orders, which bathroom to use, only using their own materials, always keeping the appropriate distance etc.). So far I am not scheduled to teach, but I am on call in case a teacher calls in sick to substitute teach then.
We are waiting to hear from the government whether maybe more students come back to school at the beginning of May. I do not think we should.
So I have to be here instead of in Berlin with my hubby. He is working from home most of the time, but he has to be there, because sometimes he goes to the building sites to look at things etc. (he is a civil engineer). Being apart makes things a little more difficult mood-wise for me. On the other hand, it is nice to have all the kitchen utensils I like and different rooms to be in. And to have the nice and sunny balcony to sit on. And we can visit at the weekends. Trains are still running (and they are almost empty so it is pretty safe to take them). But we'll probably just see each other every other weekend.
Anyway, compared to other people, we are blessed. Not one person in our families has contracted covid yet. We are not in any physical danger of being hurt. We are not fearing for our livelihood. So I should be grateful. I just don't always feel grateful. I sometimes just want this to be over.
In the meantime it is obligatory to wear those simple cloth facemasks in stores and public transport from Monday.
The weather here in Germany is just so sunny, which is a huge help for everyone's mood.
I feel with you about all the things you and your loved ones miss. Camps, choirs, going to the office etc... It is hard!
I watched all the episodes of Some Good News today (the first two I had watched before, but watched them again). Together with the flower bouquet it helped making me feel better.
So I am going to pour myself a glass of wine now and go outside to sit in the early evening sunshine and finish my book.
Miriam wrote: "So I should be grateful. I just don't always feel grateful. I sometimes just want this to be over."This captures it for me exactly!
As that essay points out, we just need to arrive. Just take it a day, an hour, a phone call, a bouquet of flowers at a time.
I think what causes me the most anxiety and stress, as I have been analyzing my emotions the past couple days, is that I have no control over whether people do the right thing... whether it is you common citizen, the executives where I work, my own government etc I have no real say in what happens. When I found out we might go back in 2 weeks to work I got really anxious because we are successfully working from home. Our ability to do our jobs is not at all dictated by being in the office, so I find it frustrating that people are pushing to go back, even on a staggered schedule. I don't see the point! But at the same time, I have no voice in what we do. The lack of control has me wound up!
Meli wrote: "I think what causes me the most anxiety and stress, as I have been analyzing my emotions the past couple days, is that I have no control over whether people do the right thing... whether it is you ..."I had not thought about the lack of control contributing to my emotional response and coping mechanisms. I should have because control is a huge part of my emotional and mental make-up.
I think you are on to something.
@ Meli, for sure the lack of control is daunting. Another friend passed yesterday (not covid related) so another friend I cannot say goodbye to. I finally let the waterworks flow, I had not had a decent cry since the lockdown. Just letting it all out seems to help
I found this on facebook, and have thought about it daily since.
Obviously easier said than done, but I think it's helped me compartmentalize things, and have a better attitude/outlook.
Sorry the pic is big, I wanted to make sure it was legible.
That is perfect, Joi. Both size and content.Now I want to know why I have not seen it on FB myself!
Joi wrote: "I found this on facebook, and have thought about it daily since.Obviously easier said than done, but I think it's helped me compartmentalize things, and have a better attitude/outlook.
Sorry t..."
Oh, I like that! And I work really well with visuals, so it is helpful to be reminded by something I can look at :) Thank you!
I kept getting mad at my boss(es) for checking on work progress etc, so I had to make a sticky note on my computer that says:
- Be thankful to be working
- Show your value
- Stay calm!
😂🤣
Meli, thank you for your comment about control. I think that is also a big part of my challenge with this. And the picture is really helpful, Joi!
I think people, a lot of people, are getting quite angry that it feels others, other states, govt, is not taking this seriously, and that puts the rest of us at risk, and prologues not just the disease but the stoppage of our lives. But here is what we can control. We can control our narrative, and how we choose to walk through this. We can control our level of kindness, our outreach. We can figure out how to see our silver linings and maintain hope. I think if we can do that, we are already learning the lessons that will not just get us through this, but will transform us and our planet towards a new normal of consciousness. I know I sound overly optimistic, and that is indeed my defense. I am the ultimate optimist, and cling to hope at all costs. But I sort of think, that that is the way through.
Miriam wrote: "Meli, thank you for your comment about control. I think that is also a big part of my challenge with this. And the picture is really helpful, Joi!"Now that I finally recognize what it is, it makes me feel better. I can control letting go of things I can't control! 😂👍🏼
Some weeks back I had a bit of a meltdown and let fear and anxiety take a front seat. Then I remembered that time a few years back when my mother had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and we siblings were all struggling to find ways to help my parents. On one particular Sunday I sat in church and I prayed for the grace, courage and dignity to see me through this journey. I gave over the worry to God, whose shoulders are bigger than mine, and prayed for acceptance of those things I could not control. I can even tell you exactly what I was wearing that day. The relief was instant and palpable. So a few weeks ago when I was having that little meltdown ... I thought back on that Sunday in church, and repeated that prayer. And I've repeated it every few days since.
It's working for me. (Also I stopped watching the orange man give his briefing.)
Book Concierge wrote: "It's working for me. (Also I stopped watching the orange man give his briefing.)"I never watched the orange man, I can't even look at his face.
I love to be in control too. I had to confront this when my daughter got a cancer diagnosis last year. That wasn't in my plan! She has a recheck tomorrow after chemo but with her type of cancer, it's almost certain it will recur. She is 6 hours away and I may need to go there in the future, with everything else that is happening. I am working on staying focused on the present and trying to remember that worrying about everything that may or may not happen doesn't help anyone. A good thing in this era is that our family has been doing FaceTime and Zoom calls so seeing each other more in one sense.
Robin wrote: "I love to be in control too. I had to confront this when my daughter got a cancer diagnosis last year. That wasn't in my plan! She has a recheck tomorrow after chemo but with her type of cancer, it..."I'm sorry to hear about your daughter.
That is definitely something you can't control and like nothing you can really do but put your faith in the medical professionals, which sounds a lot like dealing with COVID19 (in the sense of putting your faith in someone else to help you through).
It is wonderful to live in a time when we can all be so connected.
Amy wrote: "I think people, a lot of people, are getting quite angry that it feels others, other states, govt, is not taking this seriously, and that puts the rest of us at risk, and prologues not just the dis..."First, I know someone who died of COVID-19--she was in her late 80s and had advanced Alzheimer's. It is horrible, but her husband died very peacefully earlier that week and she was so very dependent on him--they had a very long and loving marriage, I think any virus that came along would have been fatal for her. He was the only one she was calm for even after moving to a nursing home. This is NOT to belittle any other tragedies that have happened or her death, because I am quite upset about losing this couple and am grieving for them.
While I agree that we need to take measures, I understand the frustration. As of April 21 the over 800,000 cases (not deaths, that's in the 40k's) in the States comes to 0.24 percent of the American population (I did that with exact numbers earlier this morning.) Not all areas are the same as the very crowded areas that are very hard it such as NYC--I heard that 55 percent of the cases have been in NY and NJ, so that area needs stricter measures than many other ones of course.
While I see the need to be cautious and am not saying we should do nothing, I understand the frustration that others are going through while losing jobs and health insurance, etc. I just read of a man who lost his restaurant job and so his private health insurance. His pregnant wife who is quite far along is waiting for her citizenship application, so cannot get medicaid. There are more people in this situation than people realize, and the numbers in situations like these are far greater than 800,000.
I personally think there are ways to open things up in many areas and have people wearing masks (not perfect, but helps), gloves, etc, controlled numbers, six foot gaps in lines, etc.
I am feeling a lot of anxiety and stress again, all stemming from the gradual acceptance that having a truly working home office requires a better set up than at present because it is going to be needed indefinitely. Even as I head into my office from time to time, and Gov. Cuomo starts easing back restrictions, it is pretty clear that I am going to end up working from home a lot more from here on, at least until there is a vaccine or I am confident I am immune. It makes me grumpy and unhappy because I like going to an office.
I can set up a better home office with a little effort and upgrading my home printer to a laserjet from an inkjet, but it means I need to stop disliking it so much. Acceptance is key. I still need an outside office...with conference rooms and reception and all that. But I will definitely be rethinking my current office lease arrangement, which is too expensive if I am barely able to be there.
I know, I am lucky to be working, truly a benefit of being a lawyer with my own practice that adapts to whatever goes on in the world. Just means my anxieties are different.
On another note, because my work involves a lot of talking to people and lots of mental stimulation, with all clients anxious and trusting I can pull off a miracle. So much of the work is triage. It is all very draining. I am preferring quiet, calm me time. I have yet to join any of the zoom events set up by my stitching group, in part because they are held weekday evenings when I am usually still working. It's funny how much more my down time now needs to be quiet time for me - reading, resting, watching movies or tv.
Oh, I did take advantage of the free streaming of the 25th Anniversary Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall in 2011 on Friday night! Sigh, what a glorious wallow!
Has anyone else managed to tap into any of the free cultural options? Streamed shows, concerts, operas, virtual art tours? Hosted watch parties? If so, what and how was the experience.
I am leaving you with this essay shared by a friend. I think it applies to all of us, even if like me you are single without children.
https://forge.medium.com/to-survive-t...