Word splice

[David]

Word splice is the term I use for when spoken words blend into each other and end up sounding completely different to what was intended.

Hopefully it's not only my family that picks up on them and finds them funny, and there'll be more posted here.

This is my offering:

Last night, while eating, my wife stated that she was going to have a nice long soak in the bath, and that she was going to use semen rolls. Naturally the daughters and I looked at one another and cracked up.

She'd actually said: Sea Minerals!

Guess what phrase has stuck? :~)

[Michael]

A teacher in my college had a very strong accent, which led to many amusing occurrences of this.

"No, you can't" sounded very much like an insult...

[Kath]

Mint spies. ;)

[David]

Good ones.

[Pete]

Mustafa Cuppa

[Tim]

You for coffee?

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

There is an Isle of Ewe in Scotland somewhere. In Loch Ewe.

[Lynne (Tigger's Mum)]

I made some undrinkable rice wine which was actually 'for cooking'. At least that was what I thought he said as he spit it out. Its now the official classification of inferior plonk for us

[Will]

A friend told me a story about a foreign holiday where the surly waiter would ask "you for coffee?" every breakfast time.

The problem was that he said it so quickly that all the words merged together. The first time he said it they thought he was telling them to go away.

[David]

There is a Radio 4 programme called Cross Incontinents.

For some reason in the listings it is known as Crossing Continents.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

David wrote: "There is a Radio 4 programme called Cross Incontinents.

For some reason in the listings it is known as Crossing Continents."

I know a few of them!

[David]

Gingerlily - Elephant Philosopher wrote: "David wrote: "There is a Radio 4 programme called Cross Incontinents.

For some reason in the listings it is known as Crossing Continents."

I know a few of them!"

Well, it is easy to see how one could lead to the other.

[Jim]

There's always Kodály's "Buttocks-Pressing Song

[Lynne (Tigger's Mum)]

That is when a coach party arrives at the motorway services just before us.

[Lynne (Tigger's Mum)]

My reply was to Cross incontinents but somehow Jims remark sneaking in unseen has some relevance too.

[David]

Lynne (Tigger's Mum) wrote: "My reply was to Cross incontinents but somehow Jims remark sneaking in unseen has some relevance too."

Quite spooky. Maybe Jim used some form of telepathy.

[Lynne (Tigger's Mum)]

My sister met her daughter's teacher at parents' evening. Miss Trunt was actually Mr. Hunt.

[David]

Ah, reminds me of Radioactive's Mike Hunt.

[Lynne (Tigger's Mum)]

I laugh when Mike Catt plays rugby.