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Literary Fiction > How do I write this scene?

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message 1: by Scott (new)

Scott Seeger | 2 comments I want to write a scene at a party where we are introduced to a lot of characters talking. Three people in the corner are talking about politics. We move to two people sitting down on the couch talking about cheating boyfriends. Then to the kitchen as three people are making bean dip and discussing traveling to Bangkok.

I was thinking of separating each conversation with a simple double space and some light description to indicate to the reader that the party setting hasn't changed.

Is this a bad idea? I feel like this would be a really effective scene in a movie but but could it be done in a book? Sort of similar to the rule where movies can do montages but books should steer clear of them.


message 2: by Bruce (new)

Bruce (brucearrington) Great question. A movie works because you can see the literal differences between the characters who are speaking. However, the fractured points of view can create a movie (or story) where it's hard to tell where the focal point of the story lies--in other words, who is the main character driving the story? That can make the entire story seem like it has come apart.

One suggestion might be to make each group of people who speak into their own chapter. That way the reader understands it's the same party, but different people taking up the focus. But one thing you might want to keep in mind is...who is the main character driving the story forward? And how are you approaching that?

Hope this helps!


message 3: by Steven-John (last edited Nov 16, 2019 03:14AM) (new)

Steven-John Tait (stevenjohntait) Also, following on from Bruce's response, and along the same lines as his first paragraph, it depends on the point of view you've chosen leading up to that point.

If you're using first person, those talking could already be known to your protagonist - make the scene about him/her too - is he/her standing alone, bored, shy, angry? taking everything in from a distance. His/her history with these people would come to the surface - frank and his politics is boring. Suzi 'found herself' backpacking in Thailand but lost all notions of personal hygiene - I hope she washed her hands before making that bean dip...

All the best,
Steven-John


message 4: by Inkslinger (new)

Inkslinger (the_inkslinger) | 7 comments It's also really overkill typically in written word vs visual scenes, it can be done, but few seem to have the skill to manage it without just pulling the reader out of the story.

I'd suggest, either handling it in the above mentioned way.. where the three discussions are spread out over a reasonable about of time (as might be best for anything in-depth).. or.. using the POV of someone moving from conversation to conversation. The second.. would usually come across best if you just need to cover a little material with each group, and still must be handled with some precision.. otherwise the reader won't know who's talking and why they're being subjected to it.


message 5: by Christian (new)

Christian Williams | 1 comments You're right, that's a movie tracking shot. Or in TV, a "pass." Pretty much the only way for them to do it, given the linear nature of the thing. But ah, you've got a hundred ways to approach. For example:

He remembered the soiree as a jumble of images, none of them including him. There were Jim and Lucinda, talking about Claude ehind his back, hiding in the curtains etc. He had avoided Lt. Hammersby, but unsuccessfully, allowing Hammersby to drag him by the arm to his clubby bunch on the patio. It had been like wading into hypocrisy waist-deep, etc. Escape was not in his fate, however, as he then found the doors to the embassy meeting room and its promise of clear air to be blocked by the New Zealand All Blacks, whose Number 8 identified him instantly from 10 yards away. "Ferd!" he cried, dashing toward him across the carpet, mimosa tucked away like a rugby ball, "bloody grand that you came, jine us thyn wontcha?"

Yes, it is
very easy to write somebody else's story....


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