Testing out the pitch for my WIP:

[Martyn]

Testing out the pitch for the fourth novel in the Amsterdam Assassin Series:

Assassin Katla's sabbatical year turns out to be her biggest challenge yet…

After relentless scrutiny by law enforcement, freelance assassin and corporate troubleshooter Katla Sieltjes promised her boyfriend Bram to take a year off. Not only to stave off the attentions of the DEA and Homeland Security, but also to disprove Bram's notion that she's suffering from occupational psychosis.

But there's no rest for the wicked. An unexpected pregnancy, a brother in peril, a secretive consultant, and a devious infiltrator conspire to get Katla to do what she's good at: solving troubles her own unique way.

Ghosting is the fourth novel in the Amsterdam Assassin Series. With authentic details and fast-paced action against the backdrop of the notorious Dutch capital, featuring an uncompromising heroine and a supporting cast of unusual characters, Ghosting gives a rare glimpse in the local Dutch culture, Jamaican gangs, computer hacking, forensic sciences, martial arts, foreign intelligence services, the art of social engineering, and the brutal effectiveness of disciplined violence.

See below for new version...

[Yolanda]

Sounds good to me. Makes me want to read it. Just one small thing - Ghosting gives a rare glimpse 'into' the local Dutch culture,

[Lily]

Overall, it's excellent. I am a little bit iffy about the way the last paragraph is written. The tone shifts from fiction to non-fiction, which might lend confusion. I'm sure you did your research and it's all accurate, but it seems to me that accuracy should be a part of the reading experience instead of the pitch.

I hope that makes sense. It's first thing in the morning for me. Sipping coffee...

[Martyn]

Yolanda wrote: "Sounds good to me. Makes me want to read it. Just one small thing - Ghosting gives a rare glimpse 'into' the local Dutch culture,"

You're right. I'll have to mend that... thanks for your feedback.

[Lily]

Anytime :) The rest of it sounds really good.

[Martyn]

Lily wrote: "Overall, it's excellent. I am a little bit iffy about the way the last paragraph is written. The tone shifts from fiction to non-fiction, which might lend confusion. I'm sure you did your research ..."

I understand what you mean. I found that many people enjoy the other books in the series because they're both suspenseful and insightful/educational, which might explain the 'non-fiction' feel of the last paragraph. I'll think on it, thanks for your feedback.

[Amber]

The second paragraph is the series blurb rather than the individual book's blurb. Could you clarify that it describes all the books?

After the blurb workshop in The Source, I created a series tag line that goes after each book's blurb, with a heading that indicates that's what it is.

So it might be: Ghosting book blurb The Amsterdam Assassin Series series blurb

Both are good, by the way.

[Martyn]

Amber wrote: "So it might be: Ghosting book blurb The Amsterdam Assassin Series series blurb..."

I like that. Smart thinking. Thanks, Amber.

[Martyn]

Okay, after some suggestions, here's a new version:

Assassin Katla's sabbatical year turns out to be her biggest challenge yet…

After narrowly escaping from the relentless scrutiny of combined intelligence communities, freelance assassin and corporate troubleshooter Katla Sieltjes promised her boyfriend Bram to take a year off. Not only to avert the attentions of the authorities, but also to disprove Bram's notion that she's suffering from professional deformation.

But there's no rest for the wicked. An unexpected pregnancy, a brother in peril, a secretive consultant, and an assiduous infiltrator conspire to force Katla to renege on her promise and once again do what she does best: solving problems in her own incomparable way.


Ghosting is the fourth novel in the Amsterdam Assassin Series.

With authentic details and brisk action against the backdrop of the notorious Dutch capital, featuring a devious heroine and a supporting cast of singular characters, Ghosting gives a rare glimpse into local Dutch culture, Jamaican gangs, computer hacking, forensic sciences, martial arts, foreign intelligence services, the art of social engineering, and the brutal efficacy of disciplined violence.

[Lily]

That's a really nice format, I like that!

[Yolanda]

Just gets better and better.Really good

[Jules]

Really good blurb. Definitely grabs the readers interest.

[Virginia]

It makes me want to read it!

[Martyn]

Thanks!

The pitches for the first three books Reprobate: A Katla Novel, Peccadillo: A Katla Novel, and Rogue: A Katla novel, were more like the first post, but I will be updating them to this format.

[Jackie G]

Yes, very good indeed.