| angus and oliver - void

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

oliver's side
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(hide spoiler)]

[kaya, true neutral]

angus' side
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[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

There were a lot of very suspicious and notable things about Oliver. While he always looked pristine, crisp and well taken care of, his half of the room was always in disarray - and not with clothing and soda cans and used tissues like the average teenage boy's room. But with books and bones with ancient symbols etched into their archaic surfaces, with melted candles and old withered flower petals and books, gosh there were so very many books. He was an odd guy, but most within the Void house were... odd. Though lately he'd been out of the dorm room more and more. Visiting someone late at night. He'd just come back from one of those visits, shutting the door quietly behind him and setting a small bag onto the edge of his bed, leaving the light off as the morning sun began seeping in through the cracks in the curtains. He didn't know if Angus was awake, and didn't want to wake him.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus had woken up a few hours ago after a nightmare, and been drifting in and out of sleep ever since. He was too afraid to go back to sleep, lest he have another nightmare (it had happened before — two nightmares in one night left him drained all day), so instead he sat on his bed playing cat's cradle with some string he'd found in his pocket. He had noticed that Oliver wasn't there, but it was hardly unusual.

When the door opened and Oliver crept in, Angus looked up. "Where were you?" he asked, his voice softer than usual. He always spoke quietly — a force of habit, or just nature perhaps. But something about the darkness of the room made him want to speak even quieter — it no longer felt normal, but strange and eerie. His tone held no judgement; he occasionally went out at night as well, when he needed space and quiet or when he wanted to talk to Thanatos, or sometimes simply to study somewhere he felt more at home — places high in the air, usually. But he was curious, and for once awake at the same time as Oliver was here.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver's gaze darted over at Angus and he raised his brows. He thought about his words carefully, unsure of how exactly to reply to his roommate - of which he hardly saw on the regular. He'd been spending a lot of time with one teacher in particular. And though he was certainly of age, it wasn't exactly school policy, not that he cared much for school policy. He slowly unbuttoned his waistcoat, setting it down on the bed next to his bag before turning to his altar and running his fingers over the surface, "You're awake, you must have been troubled by nightmares again, it's quite an early hour" he spoke, dodging his question.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus watched Oliver carefully. He was clearly deflecting, but why? He guessed that it was either very personal, like his own reasons, or heavily frowned upon. It being Oliver, though, it could be anything that he just didn't feel like explaining. Given the time, that was understandable. "If the answer is obvious enough that you can predict it, why ask?" People often assumed that because of his age, Angus was naïve and stupid. And sure, there were a lot of things he didn't understand, but he was observant, and fourteen-year-olds aren't nearly as small as adults make them out to be. Sometimes it worked to his advantage, and other times it was a hindrance. But he coped. "It's probably evil spirits hiding under your mess over there," he said, gesturing to the books scattered on the floor, despite knowing full well that there were no evil spirits in the room and none would dare to come in without Oliver's permission. He wasn't so sure about his own intimidation abilities.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

He raised his brow and the corner of his lip curled up into a smile. He felt something stir within him, something that rudely reminded him of his own humanity. He did crave the satisfaction of venting. Humans were social people, and in the end, all of them were just different types of humans. Regardless of power or origin. He bit his lip, "It wasn't a question - only a statement" he turned his attention to the books, "You're probably just coming into your powers, it takes a while, the nightmares eventually cease but... the visions do not" he added quietly, stirring a tonic over his altar.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus shook his head. "It's not... it's not that." He was stumbling over his words again, he knew he was — and he could feel his throat closing up. It was rare that he couldn't speak around his house members, and feeling unable to communicate what he meant only worsened the anxiety brought on by the nightmare. He pulled his blanket around him, staring at the floor blankly. He knew that the issue was not anything else, it was him, but the fear of being misunderstood, the fear of being corrected, the fear of having his words used against him — these dwarfed his thoughts and rationality. Angus could practically feel the panic attack looming on the horizon of his mind, and he didn't want to. Tiny blue scales began appearing on his face and hands, though he didn't notice, too focused on trying to stop his feelings from getting out of hand. Involuntary transformation was bad — he hardly ever had this problem unless he was particularly upset.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver glanced over and noted the change in his appearance. So he carefully worked at the mortar and pestle, mixing something crushed into his tonic before turning and approaching Angus. He was the brewer of the house, typically spending hours at the altar just beside the window, mixing ingredients, some he'd noticeably taken from the greenhouse - which were supposed to be academically exclusive to classes.

He approached Angus suddenly, holding out a small vial of the tonic, "It's a muscle relaxer" he spoke up, his voice like a dagger through the silence that'd settled between them, "It should calm you down" he added to further clarify what it was for. He was well aware that Angus had problems speaking - he was well aware of most things, and as such typically he didn't need to ask. Which seemed condescending to most people he interacted with, but it was commonplace within the Void house that people just knew things. Including things about himself, which he was uncomfortable with.

"You can speak when you're ready"

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus took the vial, and downed it, feeling the effects almost instantly. The scales stayed — he would have had to be aware of them to be able to make them go away — but he found his voice. "Thanks." He took a deep breath, then started again. "The dreams — they're not that. They're normal nightmares. I've had this particular one since I was... six, I think. It's just PTSD or something." Compared to the other dreams — the visions — that he got, the nightmares weren't particularly bad, but the memories they brought back were what really caused the problem. "You still haven't answered my question, either."

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver was cautious, though he knew Angus wouldn't tell anyone else - not that the people in this house wouldn't eventually find out anyways. He nodded, "I haven't" he agreed, thinking for a moment about how he'd go about answering. The really over the top flamboyant side of him, the one he hid, wanted to gossip like a school girl. He'd never felt this way about anyone, but Jason - or rather, Mr. Carver was always pleasantly surprising. And for someone like him, that was the most difficult thing to come by. "I've... found someone" he began, unsure of what else to say about the matter. It was surprising enough that he'd be interested in someone romantically, but he'd always liked Angus, he was one of the few people he genuinely enjoyed being around, even if they didn't talk much.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus had expected something different. Performing rituals or searching for books. But it made sense that he would go out at night to visit whoever this person was — the daytime was too busy, and Oliver hated people knowing things about him. And also the usual reason, probably, but Angus didn't want to picture that, or even think of it. Let him hold onto the illusion of innocence for a little longer. "There's got to be more to it than that," he said. "Dating someone is hardly worth evading a question." The unspoken words underlaid his tone — you don't have to tell me more, but now I'm curious.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

"... It's not a very practical choice of romantic partner" he replied vaguely. He was typically a bit vague and sometimes cryptic in the way he answered things - now was no exception. He often wondered what Angus thought about dating. Surely the boy was nervous enough as it was talking to friends, he couldn't imagine him with a date. Well he could but that wasn't the point.

<< tbh im totally down to make angus a babe if you ever need one >>

[kaya, true neutral]

"Arguably romance in and of itself isn't very practical," Angus said. He hadn't spent very much time around his birth family, but the few memories he had of the first few years of his life were mostly of his parents arguing with his grandparents while baby Angus had played with his toys, going completely unnoticed. Romance seemed very prone to going wrong, and he had enough trouble with communication without the added stress of the other person being invested in him saying the right thing. a couple of times, he'd found out that someone had a crush on him — but usually they lost interest once they realised that he was just the weird mute kid, not the cute shy one they'd taken him for. People were fickle, and yet they dedicated so much time to forming connections that would break over the slightest thing.

hes not really in the emotional space suitable for a romance rn, but maybe eventually

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

<< haha same >>

Oliver nodded, "You have a fair point" he replied calmly, looking away and beginning to slowly pace along the side of his room, "Impractical from a ... situational standpoint" he further elaborated. "So impractical in fact that the relationship itself requires a level of secrecy" he turned and glanced at Angus expectantly. It was his way of letting Angus know he could not tell anyone.

[kaya, true neutral]

"Could you not just tell me not to tell anyone." Angus shook his head, laying his head on his pillow and closing his eyes. He was tired — nonstop nightmares every night meant that he usually got at most five hours of sleep. "I'm too tired for riddles." Normally, Angus would have been willing to play along with the complicated phrasing, but he wasn't awake enough to be thinking straight.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver stared at him, deadpanning and sighing quietly, "It's a professor, that is who I've been going out late at night to meet with" he spoke blatantly at long last, though it was only this once, he was cutting them both a little bit of slack. He wasn't really awake enough to come up with elaborate riddles at the moment anyways. "And yes, I would prefer it if you didn't tell anyone" he added. Though he knew some already suspected it - rumors spread like wildfires.

[kaya, true neutral]

"I mean so long as they're not using their position to get you to do stuff — the power imbalance is the main reason people have a problem with teacher/student relationships." Oliver was eighteen — an adult — and Angus had a feeling that if anything, he would be the one with power over the other person. He yawned. "I would ask which one, but I'm not sure I want to know."

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

He nodded, "I find it unlikely that you'd want to know" he agreed. Angus wasn't really the gossip type, he figured going on some long spiel about all of that juicy information wasn't something that'd entertain the other. He respected that. He turned and approached his bookshelf, running his fingers over the titles, searching for one in particular. "He's a good person. Genuine people are difficult to find these days." he spoke as if just coming to that conclusion. Though his idea of "good" and "bad" were incredibly different compared to the text book definitions.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus yawned again. "Sounds good. I'm really tired, though, and there's like... an hour before I have to wake up again, so can we cut this conversation short or continue it in the morning?" He hoped he wouldn't dream — although the dreams seemed to be less persistent when Oliver was around, as though they were scared of him. Rolling over onto his back and pulling his blanket all the way to his chin, he closed his eyes and waited for sleep.

He was dreaming. A vision, probably — too lucid for a nightmare. He stood in the same room he had fallen asleep in — only it was on fire. Oliver wasn't there. He couldn't transform, and he couldn't run. He saw the ceiling give way, felt it crash down on him. He woke, breathing heavily. Disoriented and too scared by the dream to look around, he didn't know how long he'd been asleep for. Time passed weirdly in dreams, and often he woke after a five-second dream to find that he had slept for several hours. "Please tell me that wasn't a vision," he mumbled under his breath, still trying to calm his breathing.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver sat at his altar with wide eyes. His eyes, charcoal, completely black like an oily ocean on starless nights, staring into the symbols and crystals that lined the surface. "Sh" he whispered. There was a glow emanating from the center of his table and he learned forward, staring into it. To the untrained eye it was nothing but visage of waves and curling tendrils. But to Oliver it was far more than that - disturbances, jolts in the void itself. Something awful had just escaped, something awful was happening. "What did you dream Angus?" he suddenly questioned.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus sat up, shivering slightly. "This room, on fire. I was standing in the middle, I couldn't move or transform or anything. The ceiling fell on me." He thought back to the dream, then realised something else had been amiss. "You weren't here, and there was nothing on the floor either. No books or candle wax or anything." He tugged at the green quartz stone he always kept around his neck, worrying. He had gym first, he could afford to miss that — the teacher would be annoyed, but it wasn't as though Angus was a particularly athletic person. He really needed to talk to Thanatos soon — something strange was happening, and he wanted to know what.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver nodded slowly, seeming not quite himself as he tapped his fingers idly against the wood beneath him, "... Don't leave Addermire" he suddenly warned. "Don't go into the city. Don't approach Brigmore House. Or do your best to avoid it. You're not prepared for this yet. None of you are." he spoke quietly.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus frowned. "What do you mean? What is 'this'?" So much for talking to Thanatos — based on those warnings, he probably shouldn't be going into the forest either. He wrapped his blanket tighter around himself, scratching absentmindedly at some stray scales that had appeared on his hand. He wondered, idly, how Oliver would react if he summoned Thanatos here. Or how Thanatos would react — he didn't seem to like people very much, aside from Angus.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

He turned his gaze to Angus and tilted his head slowly, almost ominously. "You'll know eventually. Just heed those warnings." he replied, voice still low and quiet. He was clearly a bit on edge. This was unexpected, he had to admit. He couldn't determine whether or not he was impressed or concerned.

[kaya, true neutral]

"Okay, okay." Angus was worried — it was rare that Oliver was actually concerned about something. He tended to maintain an aloof air when it came to such things — or at least, that was what Angus had observed thus far. For him to be giving Angus warnings, it must be very dangerous. "I need to talk to a friend, though." Resting one hand on the quartz round his neck, he focused and waited. A dark shadow drifted into existence on the floor beside his bed, and became a man, who silently sat beside Angus and took his hand, preventing him from scratching at it. Neither of them spoke. Angus could tell that Thanatos was trying to ascertain whether or not he should trust Oliver, and he felt scales begin to appear on his cheeks out of embarrassment. It had been a stupid idea to put the two of them in a room together — but he wanted comfort, and Oliver with his warnings wasn't really suitable for giving it.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver glanced over but seemed otherwise unsurprised, turning back to the crystals gathered on his altar. "An era of prosper is coming to an end and you are one of the first to sense that." He explained quietly, staring deep into the abyss, struggling to find something that'd be indicative of the coming events.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus relaxed slightly when Oliver didn't react negatively. Then again, given that the other interacted with god knows what on a daily basis, it shouldn't have been that surprising. "Why does it have to be me? Why can't the stupid visions go to people who actually want them?"

Thanatos spoke — out loud, which surprised Angus even more than him taking a physical form. "You are more special than you think you are, child. The universe does not choose at random when it comes to life and death."

Angus sighed, and leaned on his shoulder. It was very bony, but he didn't particularly care. "Why is everyone I know allergic to plain speaking and admitting that the universe just hates me."

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

He felt a faint pity form within him. Once upon a time he'd had the same thoughts. Before the sacrifice, before the men in cloaks with double bladed daggers and incantations and ink as black as obsidian. He swallowed, glancing back at Angus and shaking his head, "The abyss, malevolent as it might seem, holds no bias. It only seeks to perpetuate the constant flow of time, and with that the path it must take. You are a witness. The others are participants. If everyone's an actor, and all the world a stage, we are the audience, we are the skeptics, we are the dreamers"

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus groaned. "What did I just say about plain speaking. Listen, I'm sure what both of you have to say is super relevant and important but friendly reminder that I'm fourteen and it's bloody four am. So you two can have your deep philosophical discussion, but personally I'd like to either get some actually decent sleep or at the very least stare at the wall and not think about anything until I have to get up and go to class."

Thanatos sighed heavily, and faded away.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

His expression didn't change as he listened to Angus. Regardless of how Angus felt, he was going to have to live with this. This was his life now. None of them here wanted it, but it was a gift that couldn't be taken back. "Given coming events, it might be useful for you to take note of your dreams, keep them somewhere safe" he spoke up.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus sighed. "Shut up, I'm sleeping." Maybe it was a good idea, but trying to demand anything of a tired fourteen-year-old boy who was sick of being talked to in riddles was unlikely to go well. He would probably regret it later, but he was too annoyed at the moment to be willing to listen.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver stared at him a moment just as the tremor hit. It was subtle, it clearly came from Syracuse. That'd be the first tremor. Chaos was angry. When he got angry, he got destructive. It'd take a while for him to simmer down and until then, things would be tense. Not just physically, Chaos had an odd way of inducing paranoia, nightmares, anger and the like.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus felt the tremor, and curled into a ball, staring at the wall. Something was wrong, like the universe had shifted a few millimetres and now everything was ever so slightly out of place — not enough to be obvious, but enough to be unsettling. The room felt too quiet — eerily so. "What was that?" he whispered. He was still tired, still annoyed that nobody would answer his questions properly, but he was also curious.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

"Chaos." Oliver muttered as though Angus would understand. Most people didn't know the story of the primordials. Though he wouldn't be surprised if Angus did know, considering how precocious he was, and his painfully strong connection to the void.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus rolled over, now wide awake. "Chaos? As in, like, the primordial? Or the idea?" Because, knowing Oliver, it could be either. Earthquakes were, after all, chaotic. He vaguely knew that there was a primordial deity called Chaos, but he didn't know anything concrete about the real primordials — other than that they were mostly gone.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver still stared over Angus, mulling over different ideas and possibilities in his head as he slowly nodded, "Both" he answered bluntly. He couldn't be cryptic right now, there was too much happening. Too much to think about.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus closed his eyes — then opened them again, not wanting to remember the dream. "Yikes," he said, his tone flat. "Do you think Chaos knows how to make the dreams go away?" He assumed that the primordial wasn't a good person — the tremor hadn't exactly been pleasant — but if they could make the dreams go away there was bound to be some safe way to approach them.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

"The dreams will never go away." He spoke as if he were almost agitated, glancing at Angus and furrowing his brows. "He may promise you, whisper bittersweet possibilities to tempt you into his ranks, but those dreams are forever yours. Your connection to the void is as ancient as the hollow bones of the universe, they manifest as they please, that is your burden to carry." he explained.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus groaned. "So I'm forever doomed to getting like three hours of garbage sleep every night. What's the damn point of super-powerful ancient beings if they can't even do that?" He probably should have been taking this a little more seriously, but it was... 5am? 4am? And he hadn't had a decent night's sleep for weeks. So excuse him for not wanting to be entirely serious. "How can my connection to the void be ancient when I've been alive for fourteen years?"

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

"You're a vessel" Oliver said simply, closing his eyes, "All of you are vessels. The power within you, your consciousness, that is what's ancient. You've existed far longer than fourteen years, you just can't remember the other existences you've held." he explained, not really expecting Angus to understand. No one ever did.

[kaya, true neutral]

"So it's like... reincarnation? But sans cool soulmate stuff, just with a bajillion nightmares?" Angus frowned in thought, then blinked. "Wait, but like— is it like... could you remove the thing in the vessel and have a mundane person? Or would you just have a shell?" Okay, maybe he was just looking for as many loopholes as he could, but he never asked for this. "Is it possible to remember past lives? Because that would be cool. Like... the possibilities for a history student who can remember parts of what they're studying."

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

Oliver didn't like answering questions. He knew a lot sure but these were his burdens, like Angus' nightmares he experienced horrible flashes of all time and space almost constantly. He and Angus weren't exactly in the same boat though, just running the same river. "Possibly." he said to no question in particular.

[kaya, true neutral]

"Okay, fine. Don't answer my questions." Angus turned back to face the wall, staring into space as thoughts crowded his head. He wanted to sleep. He wanted answers. He knew he wouldn't get either — not today, anyway. Why he bothered to even ask, he wasn't sure. Oliver showed no respect for a fourteen-year-old's curiosity. He had half a mind to go looking for this Chaos person, see if they had the answers — although they couldn't stop his dreams, they might be able to answer his other questions. Surely Oliver wasn't the only person who knew the answers to everything.

[kaya, true neutral]

hey do u wanna rp these two in the dorm after angus gets back from talking to chaos? just a thought, u don't have to

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

<< oh sure! do you want me to post first or do you want angus to come in late at night with oliver there? im gonna hold a house master meeting here soon, so it'd probably be right after that meeting >>

[kaya, true neutral]

i can post first

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus clambered through the window clumsily, shivering. He should have worn a jacket, but it hadn't been cold when he left. It was past midnight, he guessed, although he had no way of accurately telling the time. He dropped to the floor as quietly as possible, hoping not to let Oliver know that he had been out – although the other hadn't been here when Angus left, so he probably already knew he'd gone somewhere, it was the details of his trip that he wanted to avoid his roommate finding out.

[The Outsider (Whales or Whatever), gay eldritch whale god]

The bones sang to him, they chimed with the melodies of oblivion, like whale songs from the deep, a chorus, a rising cacophony of sorrow and happiness, tidal waves of emotions with each spiraling branch. When he felt Angus enter the room, even with his back turned to the other, he remained still, eyes studying the ancient etchings on the surface. "You had an eventful night I presume?" he spoke calmly. Leveled. Though noticeably tense.

[kaya, true neutral]

Angus spun around. "I hate you," he replied. "Can't you just pretend you didn't hear me?" He didn't know what Oliver was doing – he wasn't sure he wanted to know what Oliver was doing. "I just went out to look at the stars." So technically that wasn't all that had happened, but he wasn't talking about what had happened – rather, what he had intended to do in the beginning. Oliver seemed tense, and while Angus had never really seen the other get angry at him, he didn't want to find out if he was capable of reacting that way.