Can I get feedback on my blurb?

[Luke]

Hi, I'm a new group member.
I'm an author (aspiring author) but not looking to promote myself here. Rather, I'm wondering if this is an appropriate place to post the blurb of my upcoming book for feedback on it?
It (the blurb) is in beta form. (The book won't be published for a couple months btw) I'm simply tweaking the blurb and looking for some avid UF readers to provide feedback on whether it's hooky or not?
So... this a good place for that? If not, can somebody point me to a better fit?

[Luke]

Guess I'll go ahead and post the blurb because looks like it's fine by group rules.
I welcome feedback (positive or negative). Obviously, my primary concern is whether it's hooky or not?

With great power comes… a whole lotta trouble

My name is Gabriel Ward. A year ago I woke up in the smoldering rubble of my apartment. No burns. No cuts or bruises. No memory of what the heck happened.
Then, a guy who could give Methuselah a run for his money dumps another bucket of weird on me. Turns out, most of the things I thought were merely myths are real — and I’m one of them.
An Heir.
It’s not what you’d think. No trust fund. No deed to a charming fixer-upper. Just a crazy story and a front row seat to an eternal war.
I’d call BS on it but for the magic. Cool, right?
Yeah, sure, until a diabolical douche starts playing puppet master with mortal souls and that magic puts me in the thick of it.
With earthly authorities in over their heads, and unearthly authorities screwing around with their own agenda, it’s up to me to stop it. My only chance is embracing my heritage at whatever the cost. Because if I fail, the city will become a demonic Ellis Island. Then the sulfur will really hit the fan…

[Flor]

Luke wrote: "Guess I'll go ahead and post the blurb because looks like it's fine by group rules.
I welcome feedback (positive or negative). Obviously, my primary concern is whether it's hooky or not?

With grea..."

Hi!!! I have no real experience on writing blurbs but I do on reading them. I liked it and would be interested in the story. Now, it's just my opinion, but I was hooked until that last paragraph... too much information about authorities and they just don't seem relevant to the main plot. Also, not a fan of word repetition, it makes the reader feel confused (This I do know because I'm a professional translator). Hope that's useful!!!

[Jennifer]

If you’re going to use douche in there you gotta change that heck to a “hell”