General Chit-Chat Part 2! Showing 1,451-1,500 of 2,680

[Joan]

Pam, that is scary. Good luck to him, I’m glad he has good care.

[Esther]

Pam wrote: "Had a huge scare today! My brother is in the ER. His hemoglobin level was so extremely low that he could've died. He will be staying there overnight. After they run some tests, we will know what is..."

Goodness! So glad he is getting treated.

[Marina]

Pam, I hope he recovers soon, and that the doctors will be able to find out what is going on. Hugs.

[LauraT]

Pam wrote: "Had a huge scare today! My brother is in the ER. His hemoglobin level was so extremely low that he could've died. He will be staying there overnight. After they run some tests, we will know what is..."

Let us know how things are goin Pam! I'm a bit touchy about emathology! Marta has another blood test on tuesday: we have stopped the Steroid therapy only last week....

[Alannah]

Pam wrote: "Had a huge scare today! My brother is in the ER. His hemoglobin level was so extremely low that he could've died. He will be staying there overnight. After they run some tests, we will know what is..."

That is very scary, that happened to my dad as well at the beginning of the year. Hope the treatment helps.

[Pam]

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts! It’s greatly appreciated. He’s got to stay another night and do a colonoscopy and endoscopy in the morning. Hopefully, that will determine where the internal bleeding is coming from.

[Karin]

Pam wrote: "Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts! It’s greatly appreciated. He’s got to stay another night and do a colonoscopy and endoscopy in the morning. Hopefully, that will determine where the internal..."

I hope all goes well--that they find the cause and that it is successfully treated.

[LauraT]

Finger crossed Pam!

[Pam]

While my parents and I were visiting my brother, my dad started having a medical problem and now he is in another hospital, possibly with a blood clot. I hope we have some answers soon on both of them and that nobody else falls ill! I'm going back to the hospital soon. Thanks again everyone for your good thoughts!

[Angela M]

Pam , best wishes to your brother and your . Hope all works out well for both of them .

[Diane S ☔]

Pam, you certainly have your hands full. You must be so worried. I hope they find some answers. Will keep them in my prayers.

[Joan]

Pam - I hope they are both up and around soon.

[Marina]

Oh my God, Pam, this must be so stressful! I honestly hope they will both recover soon with no serious consequences.

[dely]

Pam wrote: "While my parents and I were visiting my brother, my dad started having a medical problem and now he is in another hospital, possibly with a blood clot. I hope we have some answers soon on both of t..."

So sorry to hear about your brother and father! I didn't receive anymore notifications for this discussions, argh!

I hope docs find out soon what the problems are, so they can do something as soon as possible.

[LauraT]

Oh my Pam! Let us know!

[Pam]

So, my brother and my dad are both out of the hospital. Still looking for answers, though! There may be some more testing/follow-up in the future. They are both feeling much better! Thank you everyone for your positive thoughts and words.

I have more good news! My ESL (English as a Second Language) student passed her US Citizenship test! I'm so happy for her! We will continue along, working on her pronunciation and reading skills and drop the Civics studies (yay!). We are both learning together- student and teacher. It's fun and rewarding! I'm lucky to have a very motivated and personable student.

[dely]

Pam wrote: "So, my brother and my dad are both out of the hospital. Still looking for answers, though! There may be some more testing/follow-up in the future. They are both feeling much better! Thank you every..."

I'm glad to hear such good news! Let's hope your brother and dad don't have to wait too long for answers.

And congratulations for your student!

[Esther]

Pam wrote: "So, my brother and my dad are both out of the hospital. Still looking for answers, though! There may be some more testing/follow-up in the future. They are both feeling much better! Thank you every..."

So good news all round. What a relief!

[Marina]

Great news, Pam, both on your brother and dad and on your student.

[LauraT]

Good news anyhow! Glad for you Pam

[Antonio]

A question often comes up popping in my mind. It's not my case. I am what I am. I'm sure of my identity. But the question remains: why do we decide to wear a mask online? How is that most of member-readers on socials, and also on GR, decide to mask themselves instead of revealing with their real identity?

[Pam]

Great question Antonio! I’ve been using a real pic for awhile but used to use a pic of my dog reading a book because I thought it was cute. On GR, many of us primarily have friends that we don’t know in person so maybe that’s why people use pics of things other than themselves. Nobody knows what you look like so why not use a pic of something that reflects your personality or a person you would like to look like, etc?? I think of my GR friends by their profile pic, since I have nothing else to go on, even if it’s a dog or a flower or a 1940s movie star. It’s sometimes confusing when they change their picture!

[Joan]

Good question Antonio - I used to have a picture of me, but then I thought somehow a photo of my dog, Cocoa, tells more about me. And just as important, I think Cocoa is very cute.

[Marina]

I've found an interesting infographic on banned books: https://ebookfriendly.com/banned-book...

[Esther]

Antonio wrote: "A question often comes up popping in my mind. It's not my case. I am what I am. I'm sure of my identity. But the question remains: why do we decide to wear a mask online? How is that most of member..."

I use a photo of myself for Linkedin and other work related social media. For GR, FB and others I chose an avatar that is more indicative of my personality.
Whatsapp is a problem because I use it for a lot of family communication but also work.
It is funny when I send a serious business message to a foreign colleague and his whatsapp avatar is his pet hamster!
I have no idea why but when I was first on whatsapp it decided to use a portrait photo taken when I was 5! I left it because it seemed like a good compromise between work and play.

[dely]

Esther wrote: "It is funny when I send a serious business message to a foreign colleague and his whatsapp avatar is his pet hamster!
"

Lol
It happend with me with the man of the assurance, we had to exchange pics so we used WhatsApp. He has a pic with himself with his wonderful cats and though I'm used to see him always serious, on that pic he was smiling. I think I scare people with my profile pic on WhatsApp because also there I have a painting: The Body of the Dead Christ in the Tomb by Hans Holbein (it's huge so I have only the head of the Dead Christ).

About Antonio's question: I don't want that real life people find me online though I don't have accounts on social networks. I just don't want that people know things about me I don't want them to know.
My only account is here on GR where I use a nickname used also in real life by friends and relatives. I also think that the painting I've chosen reflects a lot about me. Otherwise, both on Facebook and Instagram, I have fake accounts created because obliged by my son to see his pics or if he wants to share something with me. But I don't use them to add something about me or to add comments.

[Antonio]

Antonio wrote: "A question often comes up popping in my mind. It's not my case. I am what I am. I'm sure of my identity. But the question remains: why do we decide to wear a mask online? How is that most of member..."

"The point is not that we should always be our ‘true’ selves – an aim that is probably impossible, and certainly impractical. Instead, we should learn to understand the power of the masks we wear. We should cultivate an awareness of when we’re being unduly ‘possessed’ by them, and practise the invaluable skill of tearing them off in a timely fashion. We should resist any angry impulse to pick up a mask that carries a streak of sadism. When others are trying to impose a ‘punishment mask’ on someone else, we should have the courage to intervene. Above all, we should remember that, behind the masked figures that surround us, there are people as vulnerable, fallible, as real as ourselves."

Source: AEON - "Possessed by a mask" (https://bit.ly/1Noypib)

[B the BookAddict]

I have a photo of my dogs as my avatar because seeing them makes me happy.

Like dely, I like to keep my private life exactly that, private. Although I do not use any other social media these days, I did a couple of years ago and was stalked by someone. I imagine having my photo there would have made the situation worse.

[Antonio]

Antonio wrote: "Antonio wrote: "A question often comes up popping in my mind. It's not my case. I am what I am. I'm sure of my identity. But the question remains: why do we decide to wear a mask online? How is tha..."

Many GR readers seem to have reasons for using dogs, cats or avatars with which defend their privacy. May I say what I really think without any offense to anybody? People who love to read and write books, who discuss and share ideas, who collect books on their shelves should have the courage to show their whole person online. We all should contemplate what it means to be “real” in a virtual world.

What constitutes “authenticity” in an age where altered digital representation is the dominant way in which we meet, interact, and create? Many prefer to live two-three lives. There’s the real us, the person in a kitchen or a bar, who speaks like a human with trusted friends, and then there’s our avatar, our dog or cat. They look and sound like us, but they're not really us.

I would like to think that it’s always a "persona" I'm speaking/writing to when I express my thoughts here and not a curated digital representation many decide to adopt in any sort of public sphere, which now includes followers on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and, I’m afraid, on GR too!

I’d like to think that on GoodReads there are authentic human beings, capable to answer the traditional “wh-questions” we all learned to answer at school.

Digital Identities: Creating and Communicating the Online Self

[Angela M]

Antonio, I think it’s a personal choice . My
very real self comes across I feel in my reviews and in my interactions with the people who I connect with here . I don’t think they need to see a picture to know who I am . I don’t need to see their picture either if they choose not to use it here . It’s a choice and I wouldn’t necessarily characterize it as “hiding”. Just my point of view .

[Antonio]

Angela M wrote: "Antonio, I think it’s a personal choice . My
very real self comes across I feel in my reviews and in my interactions with the people who I connect with here . I don’t think they need to see a pictu..."

I respect, of course, your choice. I believe "identity" is not ... a choice ...

[Joan]

Antonio, I love your question - I don’t really think of my physical self as the real me - my soul/spirit is simply transported by my body - when my body crumbles to dust, my spirit will still exist.
So when you see an image of something I care about that is a snapshot of the real me.
I don’t promise to make sense, but I do try :-)

I agree wholeheartedly with your reservations about communicating with curated personalities. Perhaps social media is like any social space - some small talk, some substantive conversation. The small talk lays a foundation of trust for deeper discussion.
For me, discussing the “wh- questions” can be frustrating with people I don’t know well - so many opportunities for misunderstanding & miscommunication. Of course that leads to a bubble of people who think like me and separation from folks who see things differently.

[Alice]

I've been back from Hong Kong for a week now, and am still in holiday mood! Had a swell time reuniting with old schoolmates, especially a couple of them from Toronto whom I hadn't seen for decades.

Pam, so sorry to hear about your brother's and father's hospitalization but glad that they are both doing better. Hope the medical people will soon have a diagnosis for them. Also, I'm glad that you're enjoying your ESL teaching and have a good student.

I hope my American friends here had a good Thanksgiving Day.

[Antonio]

Joan wrote: "Antonio, I love your question - I don’t really think of my physical self as the real me - my soul/spirit is simply transported by my body - when my body crumbles to dust, my spirit will still exist..."

Thanks Joan. I also love this answer of yours. It helps me to understand and know better who Joan really is ...

[Antonio]

May I signal this interesting article to all those friends here on this thread who took part into discussion about identity. I don't think that "identity" is a choice. I believe that every human being is a "persona" ... the final result of many choices. Psychology Today ( https://bit.ly/1Noypib)

[Esther]

Angela M wrote: "Antonio, I think it’s a personal choice . My
very real self comes across I feel in my reviews and in my interactions with the people who I connect with here . I don’t think they need to see a pictu..."

It is a personal choice and not just online.
I think it is unrealistic to assume that if someone isn't showing their complete personality they are 'hiding' something.
Friends and acquaintances don't want to be constantly overwhelmed with TMI, with the exact details of how I really feel today! (Even if I am fine it is always more complicated than that)

I have many different interests and hobbies but people on GR mostly want to hear the thoughts and opinions of Esther the bookworm not about the million other interests that occupy my mind.
I have other social media for discussing my knitting, for example.
At work I rarely discuss either reading or knitting and do my friends on GR really want to hear the intricacies and irritations of my day in commercial ops?

The only person who knows my complete personality is my husband and he is the only person who really wants or needs to know that much about me.

[Angela M]

Esther, well said!

Antonio, I agree identify is not a choice, but as I mentioned in my earlier post, what I post here on Goodreads is my choice.

Joan, I agree. The images in many ways can reveal who people are. Something a photograph doesn’t do.

In any event, what people use for their picture or image on Goodreads is their choice and I respect that. I don’t need to see your face to appreciate your thoughts on the books you read .

[Angela M]

Esther, I forgot to mention that I do enjoy hearing about your trips and your family as well as the books you read .

[Ruth]

An individual's make-up, personality or identity may not be a choice but which how you present yourself to the world and which parts of you that you reveal can be more of a choice. And I think this is easier to do online, easier to compartmentalise and present an image to the world that you feel comfortable with.

In Real Life an individual may feel awkward or embarrassed about sharing their views, or they may feel they are not perceived as 'intelligent' enough to hold their own in a debate. So online they create a persona which is comfortable with offering opinions and debating issues and so perhaps are able to express themselves in a way they couldn't hope to otherwise.

[Pam]

That was an interesting article, Antonio! Thanks for sharing it. I don’t see it on GR but on Facebook, there is a lot of bullying and personal attacks, especially on news sites and political posts. Some are fake profiles (agitators) but others are real profiles, people hiding behind their computers saying things they would never say in person. I had to stop following news sites because there was too much negativity. That’s the aspect of social media that I hate. People’s true (ugly) colors come out.

Dely- That’s so funny that your profile is a painting! Since I only see a thumbnail, I thought it was an artistic photo of you looking out a window! I love the picture.

[Pam]

Welcome back Alice! Sounds like you had a great time. It’s always fun to reconnect with old friends!

[Ruth]

Pam wrote: "That was an interesting article, Antonio! Thanks for sharing it. I don’t see it on GR but on Facebook, there is a lot of bullying and personal attacks, especially on news sites and political posts...."

Yes the bullying and aggression is something else isn't it Pam. That's never anything but creating a lie to spread hatred and provoke a reaction. I like to hear different viewpoints but when I see that an individual has an agenda and isn't interested in debate I tend to switch off.

[B the BookAddict]

Antonio, I also feel like my friends here on GR now relevant information about me. How I live, family, husband and child details, my points of view, my reading likes and dislikes. I really don't think they need a photo of me as well. I don't 'hide' behind avatar in order to attack or single out someone. Most online social sites give you the choice of how you present yourself as an avatar/photo/selfie.

I also believe this is my choice!

[Jason]

Hi everyone. I apologize for my absence. I’ve been in and out of hospitals due to my physical health. And I have been spending time with my dad now that he’s retired from work.

[Antonio]

OK. The matter about identity sounds just like that of Hamlet: to be or not to be. As far as I'm concerned, I am what I am. If you give a look at my profile page, you may easily know who I am, what I look like, where I come from, what I do, when I became a member of goodreads, why I am here, read my books etc. etc. Please accept Antonio as he is. This is my choice. Thank you all for sharing.

[Esther]

Jason wrote: "Hi everyone. I apologize for my absence. I’ve been in and out of hospitals due to my physical health. And I have been spending time with my dad now that he’s retired from work."

I hope you are feeling better now Jason. It is nice that you spend time with your father. I live so close to my parents but with work I get to see them maybe once a week,

[Antonio]

B the BookAddict wrote: "Antonio, I also feel like my friends here on GR now relevant information about me. How I live, family, husband and child details, my points of view, my reading likes and dislikes. I really don't th..."

OK. The matter about identity sounds just like that of Hamlet: to be or not to be. As far as I'm concerned, I am what I am. If you give a look at my profile page, you may easily know who I am, what I look like, where I come from, what I do, when I became a member of goodreads, why I am here, read my books etc. etc. Please accept Antonio as he is. This is my choice. Thank you all for sharing.

[Pam]

With all of this talk about profile pics, I’m thinking about changing mine now! Wish I could change it from the App, since all my pics are on my phone. I’d like to use my favorite animal (besides dogs), which just happens to be featured in the book I’m currently reading.

[Alannah]

I never had any thought about my profile picture, I knew nobody on here would judge, not that I've had any experience. My current picture is four and a half years old, my appearance is a lot different but I like how it portrays me as a history nerd as I'm standing in front on Hever Castle, Anne Boleyn's childhood home.

[dely]

Antonio wrote: "OK. The matter about identity sounds just like that of Hamlet: to be or not to be. As far as I'm concerned, I am what I am. If you give a look at my profile page, you may easily know who I am, what..."

I am who I am too, despite the painting of Dalì as an avatar. And who is interested can know more about me looking at the books I read and at my reviews. And if someone really wants to bother himself, there are some pics of me in my profile. I added them only here on GR because I trust people and because most of the time people don't take their time to look into a profile.

By the way, the sentence "I am who I am" is inappropriate because I'm pretty sure that we think to know ourselves, but at the end we don't know a lot about ourselves. Of course we know where we live, where we were born, our parents' names, what we like to eat and what we dislike etc. but does all this make what we are? Aren't we also something more? Like Joan said, there is also the soul. In Hinduism there is a sentence "Tat Tvam Asi" that means "I am That". This means that we aren't who we think we are, but we are the ultimate Self/Reality.

Honestly, adding a real pic of myself as an avatar, doesn't mean that you will know more about me because I would say the same things, read the same books, behave the same way.