Amazon exiles discussion
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The complete bo**ocks, talk tripe, no music allowed thread
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suzysunshine7
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Apr 12, 2020 02:44AM
HA HA HA HA HA ! ! ! ;o>
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Lez wrote: "Latest Covid news from Europe: King Felipe, the Spanish monarch, has been quarantined in his private jet.Officials confirmed that the reign in Spain stays mainly in the plane."
Very good Lez. :-)
Lez wrote: "Not seen that before, Helen. 😁"I'd like to see an amphetamine spider and an ecstasy spider. Don't think they'd bother making any webs at all, they'd be off partying 😀.
Brilliant story here from South Australia, where some complete moron went to a supermarket and tried to get a refund for 150 32-roll packs of toilet paper (that's 4,800 rolls!) and 150 1 litre bottles of hand sanitiser. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSLrb...
YIPPEE!!
I've just received an email from Iceland with a link which, if activated tomorrow between 10:00 and 11:00, will give me VIP priority access to a delivery slot.
All I need to do between now and then is drag the house a bit closer to Peterborough so that we fall within the delivery catchment area!
I've just received an email from Iceland with a link which, if activated tomorrow between 10:00 and 11:00, will give me VIP priority access to a delivery slot.
All I need to do between now and then is drag the house a bit closer to Peterborough so that we fall within the delivery catchment area!
We got ours a couple of days ago and are expecting a Delivery tomorrow ;o>A Delivery of what though? - well? - we shall have to wait and see?! - LOL!!!
Everyone please keep everything crossed that we get the Bisto!
I've given up on home delivery or even click and collect from any of the supermarkets :(
We are supposed to have priority access to one delivery slot per week with Ocado as they set up new accounts for employees specifically for this purpose, but no-one can get into their new accounts so therefore can't get a delivery.
Ah well, at least I can go and join the queue for my supermarket of choice. About the only thing in short supply round here is flour.
We are supposed to have priority access to one delivery slot per week with Ocado as they set up new accounts for employees specifically for this purpose, but no-one can get into their new accounts so therefore can't get a delivery.
Ah well, at least I can go and join the queue for my supermarket of choice. About the only thing in short supply round here is flour.
I’ve just logged on to Sainsburys without using my priority details and there are plenty of slots available from Sunday onwards!
Not registered with Sainsburys and as they are not currently taking on new registrations I cant even find out if I could get a delivery from them.
The store is just round the corner from work so is normally my go to store when picking up a few bits after work.
The store is just round the corner from work so is normally my go to store when picking up a few bits after work.
I prefer Asda at the moment for most things - there isn't as much choice on Fruit & Veg and we don't buy Meat or Chicken from them but, for any Food Cupboard stuff and their excellent 30% less Fat Cheddar, the prices are usually pretty good ... and they seem to be the only Supermarket who are also automatically giving out Free Delivery Passes (valid until September) to all of their Priority Customers - which I think is rather generous of them ;o>Sainsburys so far here only seem to have just the odd Slot every 2 to 3 weeks and they always want at least £6 added on for the Delivery as well. Waitrose won't deliver anything under £60 worth of Shopping, Morrisons mostly costs around £4 - £5 a Delivery but Iceland is always Free if you order over £35.
The range of Goods at Iceland is unfortunately limited but still it is usually very competitive on Prices and we've been happy with what we've bought from them over the last couple of years ;o>
Tesco? - well sadly they seem to have ceased to be selling Online around here right now. No-one locally has apparently even seen so much as a single Slot being offered in almost 6 weeks now - never mind actually got one!
Grizzlygrump wrote: "About the only thing in short supply round here is flour"We are finally starting to see plenty of Flour supplies turning up around here in our independent Shops, Grizzly, so I'm thinking that some of the Flour Mills must have reopened to trading again. I'm seeing mainly Dove Farm and Wessex Mills Flour on local Facebook Pages.
I'm feeling rather privileged. I can log on right away, only have to spend £25, delivery is £6, I have always got the delivery slot I wanted and although the online doesn't offer the same range as in-store, I have usually got everything I needed. The last 2 weeks I haven't been able to order eggs or Panadol but who knows, next week may well be different.
Lez wrote: "For cat-lovers and needleworkers:https://www.boredpanda.com/tiny-croch..."
Whereas, in a parallel universe ....
https://www.sadanduseless.com/tank-ar...
the top cat (hah) is very similar to bob z - except for the chunk oot his lug! and he don' need no tank!
He's got a BIG 'dug' for a pal n'all and he ain't afraid to hide behind her! - LOL!!! ;o>
Was amused by a post on FB today;I got a delivery of a packet of Cornflakes today or, as Matt Hancock would say, 7,122 food items.
"7,122 food items"sharp, brass, sharp! ees ver' good joke, yes?
This was in my YouTube recommendations. Why oh why? And why oh why does it have over 3 million views? And why oh why do people eat them? ;-)https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hsBVvlJ...
WoW?!! ... I never knew they were so active! ;oO
It's not something they talk about - if you ask them, they just clam up :)
Brass Neck wrote: "Oh Grimsby, oh dear....https://www.grimsbytelegraph.co.uk/ne..."
They breed a very rounded type of scumbag in Grimsby, he seems to tick every box for a mercy killing.
Passed on by my brother, thought it might amuse...An Obituary printed in the London Times.....Absolutely Dead Brilliant!!
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- Why the early bird gets the worm;
- Life isn't always fair;
- And maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death,
-by his parents, Truth and Trust,
-by his wife, Discretion,
-by his daughter, Responsibility,
-and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 5 stepbrothers;
- I Know My Rights
- I Want It Now
- Someone Else Is To Blame
- I'm A Victim
- Pay me for Doing Nothing
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
Perhaps we can all chip in & buy this monstrosity for Tech?
"The tropical paradise of Jamaica has provided the inspiration for Steiff’s latest collector bear.
The craftsmen and women of the world’s oldest teddy bear factory have certainly excelled themselves with Kingston! His gorgeous 'two-tone' fur is made of hand-tipped genuine mohair – one of the world’s most sustainable natural resources.
His style is influenced by the Rastafarian culture which developed in Jamaica during the 1930s. This is the very first bear that Steiff have ever created with dreadlocks! Each one has been painstakingly plaited and applied by hand. His oversized tam and traditional dashiki shirt showcase the symbolic colours – red, green, black and gold.
Production is limited to 2,000 bears worldwide."
It's only £269 plus an extra £7.50 p&p. Bargain.
Helen The Melon wrote: "Perhaps we can all chip in & buy this monstrosity for Tech?"The tropical paradise of Jamaica has provided the inspiration for Steiff’s latest collector bear.
The craftsmen and women of the wor..."
Does it come with some ganja?
It should do at that price.One of my friends at Uni had her own plant (he, yes it was a "he", even had a name but I can't remember what it was) that was about 2 or 3 feet tall. It lived in her bedroom both at home & at Uni & got transported back & forth in her parent's car every single term for 3 yrs. They didn't have a clue what it was, just thought it was a large houseplant that she was rather attached to!
Helen The Melon wrote: "It should do at that price.One of my friends at Uni had her own plant (he, yes it was a "he", even had a name but I can't remember what it was) that was about 2 or 3 feet tall. It lived in her be..."
Not even when every trip was a trip, ha ha
Helen The Melon wrote: "It should do at that price.One of my friends at Uni had her own plant (he, yes it was a "he", even had a name but I can't remember what it was) that was about 2 or 3 feet tall. It lived in her be..."
It was surely named Robert?
Lez wrote: "It was surely named Robert?"Eh? I'm being a bit dim/slow. Robert Plant? Or maybe Herb Robert?
"I'm being a bit dim/slow"it needed announcing?
.......but yes, buy me the steiff. i'll call him bearning spear!
Tech XXIII wrote: "it needed announcing?"You're soooooo mean. I'm going to go away & cry over my cup of tea & afternoon food 😞
Tech XXIII wrote: ".......but yes, buy me the steiff. i'll call him bearning spear!"
Actually, he's called Kingston & you can only have him if you stop being rude... (no chance) 😁
Wonder if they do a punk bear - could call it Steiff Little Fingers?
Brass Neck wrote: "Wonder if they do a punk bear - could call it Steiff Little Fingers?":o)
Or a soul/funk one called Steiff Amilee Stone?(As Tech would say, "Very poor")
very poor indeed!a pop one - ted or alive
a motown one - steiffy wonder
a reggae one - mikey ted
a pub rock one - teddy and the hot rods
an industrial metal one - rammsteiff
an a.o.r. one - furryner...........................ooh, now that's poor
another punk one - furgal sharkey
a r&r one - bo cuddley
a dub one - king cubby
i'll stop now
Genius should never be curtailed.
Brass Neck wrote: "Genius should never be curtailed."Just neutered.
I'm so excited! Psychic Esmeralda has singled me out.
She's going to lead me to serenity - and the horoscope never lies!!! And all ye naysayers out there, she's a Authentic Medium AND an expert in Sacred Magic - so there!
P.S. I'm a bit worried about the "Shocking" part.
Val wrote: "I'm so excited! Psychic Esmeralda has singled me out.She's going to lead me to serenity - and the horoscope never lies!!! And all ye naysayers out there, she's a Authentic Medium AND an exper..."
Don't worry, she knows that nothing bad is going to happen, like a virus pandemic or something, (she's psychic, right?) so there's no need to ask for more info.
Just a thought, why didn't any of these gifted people mention covid19 before we all got stir crazy from worry and being stuck indoors? We wouldn't need serenity training...
But she knew! Didn't you see the bit that said: "It's written. Something very important is going to happen to you in the second quarter 2020"?The only bit she left out was that it was going to happen to the whole world.
"she's a Authentic Medium" - and I'm an authentic Extra-Large.
Amazon exiles
Books mentioned in this topic
MEGALOPHILIA: MONOKUBO ARTWORKS (other topics)Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men (other topics)
Paul Hollywood's Pies and Puds (other topics)
The Plight of the Lady Gingerlily: (other topics)
The Plight of the Lady Gingerlily: (other topics)
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