Why has feminism become synonymous with man hate?

[[deleted user]]

Molly wrote: "Pam wrote: "Bringing this topic back because I'm worried about how OSS as a forum is approaching our members who identify as male.

I witnessed some tensions (unconscious or directed) with our mal..."

Love you so much, and like it all the way up !

May be hate speech and gratuitous rudeness, are just answers to being unconfortable and in a defense mod, when you've been
cornered, like, using to much moderator's private inbox pointing out being attacked 🤦‍♀️🙇‍♀️

Hate in general doesn't make things better and is a proof of weakness, strong empowered and empowering women shouldn't hate men. I guess books are here for us to be stronger and have a better understanding of what feminism really is today, hun?

"Men explaining things to me" is such a brillant essay about men and their behavior when famous or not, their abuses etc...
They make them more predictable, a good point to avoid their manipulations...

Women are really powerfull being aware of "mansplanning"

About EW... I don't really believe it's a place to talk about her private life, so I may have mistaken, but had a feeling of someone try to say he is special and had a lot of frustration to deal with... The main purpose, is to talk about subjects she point as important to better become strong in society when facing a debate about feminism or even if you want to become an active member of any foundation or sorority or militate around the world 🙇‍♀️🤦‍♀️🙋‍♀️

Love ya, Pam you're an incredible woman (a lot of cutural background that froce respect after all theses years 😉)

[Florian]

To answer you Pam should we ask the mods to change the guidelines explicitly saying that man hate is not tolerated?

I'm usually against generalization but... I'm tempted to say we should not accept hate at all whatever the type of hate :) I guess it does not harm to generalize that.
However I agree more with this:

Should we just make a conscious pledge between all of us that we'll try to ask more questions and hear each other out?

I second you! I remember we recently talk about communication, you make a point! Let's listen to each other and ask more questions. I just wonder how we could do that, I mean if we see someone being upset or some kind of tension between a few members, should we try to appease the situation? Trying to be subtle and diplomatic by clarifying points and asking questions whenever the persons involved in the situation are too blinded by their emotions? (personally, I prefer to be called out kindly when my emotions are blinding me).

[Peter]

Emma wrote: "I also know of many non-male-identifying members (who used to be quite active) who have left OSS as well - MeerderWorter, Aglaea, Kressel, Agnes, etc. Perhaps many of these people are leaving OSS for other reasons?"

Keith wrote: "I have become totally disillusioned with OSS"

Molly wrote: "And a lot of frustrtion and Ill will, doesn't allow anybody to participate because that frustration is counter productive and let people believe they are not welcome ...."

Pam wrote: "So to everyone here... should we ask the mods to change the guidelines ...."


My two cents: I think OSS would be healthier for everyone if there was:

1) a process for creating new group guidelines for behavior, particularly around navigating conflict
2) an "on-boarding" process to acquaint new members with the guidelines
3) more active moderation to enforce the guidelines
4) a regularized feedback mechanism for members to share their experience of the group to calibrate the above

Having said that, nothing's perfect. Even if nothing changes, I plan to stick around. I'm learning too much not to, and I find the personal stories from around the world inspiring.