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The Craft > 7 WAYS TO CREATE A KILLER OPENING LINE FOR YOUR NOVEL

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message 1: by Dale (new)

Dale Day (msgtdaleday) | 10 comments I think this is, by far, the hardest task for any writer.

If you’re having trouble nailing your opening, you’re in luck: writer and WD contributor Jacob M. Appel offers up seven different approaches to writing a killer opening line (he includes examples from classic novels to accompany each, too). Here they are and they are worth bookmarking and referencing each time you begin a story.

1. A statement of Eternal Principal.
2. A statement of simple fact
3. A statement of paired facts'
4. A statement of simple fact laced with significance
5. A statement to introduce voice
6. A statement to establish mood
7. A statement that serves as a frame

I've read them all and, while they make a great deal of sense, I still don't think it hits the nail on the head. There are some definite no-nos such as showing sun, moon, stars, or other trite statements. But, in the end, it's entire the voice of each individual author. What YOU would say.

Read more @ http://www.writersdigest.com/online-e...


message 2: by [deleted user] (new)

I say it must begin with action and conflict.


message 3: by L.F. (new)

L.F. Falconer | 32 comments That article gave some great guidelines. Thanks for sharing. I think that too often we struggle so much for that "most awesome" opening line that we tend to drive ourselves a bit over the edge when sometimes simple might be the best choice. It depends a lot upon the author's own individual style and voice, as well as the story being told.


message 4: by Tony (last edited Aug 19, 2014 09:37AM) (new)

Tony Denn (tonydenn) | 24 comments I intended mine to establish mood, set a visual scene, and say something about the protagonist. Its actual construction was revised several times but is remarkably close to what I wrote on day one. Unlike the rest of the novel.


message 5: by Steven (new)

Steven Clark | 24 comments I believe first lines are critical. A first line must arouse curiosity and create in the reader an intense desire to read on. My philosophy is that if you've got the reader at the first line, you'll have them for the first page. If you have them for the first page, you'll have them for the first chapter. Have them through the first chapter and you'll have them for at least three more. And if you have them through the first three chapters, you've got them for the entire book.

The first line in my first novel is, "Only 8:10 in the morning and Cass had already ruined someone's day." It raises many questions such as,(1) Who's Cass? (2) How did she ruin someone's day? (3) Whose day did she ruin? (4) Why did she do it? Etc. The first line in my second novel is "BANG!" (The sound of an explosion that takes place in an arroyo on an Indian reservation.) Short, sweet, abrupt, and filled with question marks.


message 6: by Steven (last edited Aug 21, 2014 07:49AM) (new)

Steven Clark | 24 comments Schuyler wrote: "First lines don't means jack squat. In the long-term it's how the story *presents* itself that matters. Most readers these days won't be able to tell you what their favorite first lines from their novels are because it doesn't matter."

I respectfully disagree and agree Schuyler. First lines are critical from both perspectives. They have to grab the reader and at the same time, advance the story. Think of a person perusing a book in the aisle of a bookstore or on the sample read of an ebook. Are they going to purchase or put it down and go to the next book that does have a first sentence that grabs their attention? In those few precious first seconds, the reader won't be there long enough to determine how the story will eventually "present" itself. That comes later, after the reader has been hooked by first, the cover, second, the back cover, and third, Those precious first words they read when they open the book. Remember; an author don't get a second chance to create a first impression.


message 7: by Laura (new)

Laura | 21 comments Well said Steven!


message 8: by Ken (new)

Ken (kendoyle) | 347 comments I have to agree with Schuyler. I honestly can't remember ever picking up a book and saying, "Wow, that's a great first line. Now I must read the rest of the book."


message 9: by James (new)

James Vitarius | 29 comments These approaches, while illustrative, are a bit clinical. An effective opening line should have a certain cadence that conveys emotion and mood and creates an appealing sensation in the reader's mind. When I was working on a draft of a novel, I wrote the following potential opening lines:
3:47 AM.
Dr. Zeke Oswald thought he smelled blood.
While most of Albany slept, the doctor was in the middle of his shift.
Dr. Zeke Oswald hated loose ends.
Dr. Zeke Oswald thought the bone was broken.
The air seemed thick as the doctor walked down the hospital corridor.
Dr. Zeke Oswald wondered how she fell.
I had my favorite but in the end I let my fifteen year-old daughter decide. Which do you think is the best?


message 10: by Richard (new)

Richard Coady | 14 comments I think we're in danger of falling into the same trap that lots of agents seem to fall into: that of underestimating our readership.

If you read any guide of what agents expect from submissions you could be forgiven for thinking that any novel in which the universe doesn't get destroyed twice in the first paragraph is doomed to failure.

I would suggest that the average reader is more discerning and has a longer attention span than that. I doubt there are many readers who will pick up a book and strictly ration themselves to the first sentence before pronouncing judgement.

I would further suggest that there are countless successful books which don't have particularly arresting opening lines. Why? Because people judge a book on many more things than just the opening line.

Now, a killer first line isn't going to hurt. Neither is a killer blurb or a killer cover. But I wouldn't lose too much sleep over it. You should craft it and worry about it, but you should be doing that with every sentence in your book.

Remember: you're writing a novel. You're not entering an opening lines competition. Nobody would remember 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times' if the rest of the book hadn't been a masterpiece.


message 11: by Reev (last edited Aug 24, 2014 03:17AM) (new)

Reev Robledo (reevrobledo) | 4 comments It doesn't have to be a "killer opening line". But it has to be something that piques interest right away, something unique. Perhaps, a dialogue or situation that arouses curiosity immediately.

As a reader, I do judge the book by its first few paragraphs. It's easy to determine the author's style and if it's one I'm willing to stick with. I've often given up early on novels which are too descriptive (littered with adjectives and adverbs) from the get-go. With the millions of titles out there, yes, first lines are important for me.

With the matter of its importance in the telling of the story...
Whether to advance the plot or develop characters, shouldn't every sentence in a novel be important in the telling of the story?


message 12: by Alan (last edited Aug 24, 2014 05:17AM) (new)

Alan Ford (a1an) | 1 comments Great food for thought everyone. The general consensus is, Yes, an engaging opening line can certainly enhance the hooking process, and may actually make the difference between someone wanting to pursue the storyline further, or making a hasty assessment to reshelve the book.

I dare say though once an author has attained a large following similar to likes of the Stephen Kings, John Grishams, J.K. Rowlings, etc. that initial sentence may not necessarily damper/dissuade interest to pursue the storyline further, but, overall, it certainly can help pull the reader in otherwise.


message 13: by Daniel (new)

Daniel Benshana | 23 comments I agree with Reev, every sentence is important.

Many of the 'famous' opening lines have been around for generations and we grow up with them. That lends them added importance to us that was not there when they were first written.
Thinking of a few I see they are perfect summations of the entire story in one sentence.

Of far more importance though, I would say, is a brilliant title.


message 14: by Barbara (new)

Barbara Neville (barbaraneville) | 9 comments When shopping for my next read, the first page is key. I want to know that the book will appeal to me. Just like wine, everyone has a different taste in books. The human palate is diverse. I want to know if the book is written in first person (character driven). I want to know if I will be buried in narrative. I prefer dialogue and action. I want at least one main character in the book to be irreverent, sexy and strong. I love witty dialogue, so usually like a buddy or ensemble piece. If I pick up 50 books looking for a read, I can't read more than a bit. So catch me right away if you want me as a reader. I look for bright colored covers, titles can help...but the first page or two for me, that is the key to getting me to look further and maybe even read your book. Or mine...


message 15: by E.N. (new)

E.N. McNamara (ElizabethMcNamara) | 82 comments The first one, James. I like the first one.


message 16: by Barbara (new)

Barbara Neville (barbaraneville) | 9 comments Oh, I forgot to put my pick. #3, second choice #1, Cheers


message 17: by James (new)

James Vitarius | 29 comments E.n. wrote: "The first one, James. I like the first one."

The first line was the first written but was struck early in the editorial process. But like a first love I will always have a special fondness for it...

The line in your post, E.n., has a great rhythm to it. Adding my name imparts a familiarity that makes the line more appealing. It would make an excellent first line in a story, dontcha think? Or last line?


message 18: by Reev (new)

Reev Robledo (reevrobledo) | 4 comments James wrote: "E.n. wrote: "The first one, James. I like the first one."

The first line was the first written but was struck early in the editorial process. But like a first love I will always have a special fon..."


My vote: Combination of first and fifth line. :)


message 19: by Alp (new)

Alp Mortal Dale wrote: "I think this is, by far, the hardest task for any writer.

If you’re having trouble nailing your opening, you’re in luck: writer and WD contributor Jacob M. Appel offers up seven different approach..."


I try to start with dialogue - inner dialogue if that works better for the plot - never a description of the weather. I generally don't think about it too much - my editor is going to lacerate it in any event ...

"A four shot, tall latte please and go easy on the milk ..."


message 20: by Elle (new)

Elle Bennett | 8 comments James wrote: "E.n. wrote: "The first one, James. I like the first one."

The first line was the first written but was struck early in the editorial process. But like a first love I will always have a special fon..."


I thought the same thing too, James, when I read E.n's comment. It does have a nice flow to it. Just the right amount of words. I think it shows how simple it really is to come up with a great first line when it just comes naturally. For me, I'm more of a last-line girl. I've read books where I've really loved the story but the last line leaves me flat. I want the last line to leave me feeling that I can close the book and say to myself, "The End."


message 21: by Dennis (new)

Dennis Moulton | 38 comments I have to be honest. I vary it. I started my first book with an internal line thought by the main character. However, for the second book I started with "Carnage abounds in the aftermath of what just happened." I don't so much tend to follow the "rules" I write what I see in my head play out and while I know where I want to go with stories and the thematic points I want to make, I usually just let the stories take an organic nature. You need to write what makes sense to the story. if you overthink it and try to follow every "rule" then you'll end up having something that seems too....mechanical...in my humble opinion.


message 22: by Fraser (new)

Fraser Sherman | 48 comments Depends on the story. What works for one doesn't work for another.
But I'm inclined to agree with those above who say the killer first line is over-rated. Books have cover images, back cover blurbs--I'm unconvinced the majority of readers will read just one line, decide "well that wasn't brilliant" and put the book back down.


message 23: by Liah (new)

Liah (LiahPenn) | 5 comments Sometimes I start writing my first chapter, then delete the first two or three paragraphs because they have no action in them. That way, I'm literally starting in medeas reas. (in the middle of things)

I also find that looking at the opening lines of other great novels give me inspiration. Sometimes it starts with dialogue. NEVER start with a description of the place. Too boring.


message 24: by Fraser (new)

Fraser Sherman | 48 comments Liah wrote: "Sometimes I start writing my first chapter, then delete the first two or three paragraphs because they have no action in them. That way, I'm literally starting in medeas reas. (in the middle of th..."

A lot of my writing group (including me) wind up with clunky, info-dumpy first drafts because we're trying to inform ourselves about what's going on.


message 25: by Liah (new)

Liah (LiahPenn) | 5 comments Precisely! You get it out of your system but it really isn't needed, so dump the paragraphs and start somewhere more exciting.


message 26: by Gibson (new)

Gibson Michaels | 15 comments Schuyler wrote: I mean, who are we writing our novels for? Us or them?"

I don't know about everyone else, but I'm writing to entertain my readers. The taste in that very first bite sets the tone for the entire meal. It needs to entice the reader to want to keep reading, hinting of even more savory delights further in.


message 27: by Tony (new)

Tony Latham (tonylatham) | 27 comments Write the story. Do the re-writes and sooner or later the first sentence will crawl into your brain.

"His mouth tasted like burnt plastic; it’d been that way for three days."

That was my last first. It has to be -or should be- a hook or at least the first line in a paragraph that begins gaffing the reader.

My favorite opening line is in Rod Miller's "Gallows for a Gunman." - "Harlow Mackelprang's last supper was seasoned with my spit."

A bit off topic, but that book is a good read and even more fascinating for a writer. Each chapter is a different person's viewpoint of the event that led to the hanging. A much different way to tell a story.


message 28: by Richard (new)

Richard (rsmiraldi) | 14 comments Mr. Maas, Literary agent who wrote "Writing The Breakout Novel" recommends writing the book and then chopping the first half off. The novel should begin in the middle of an action. I tried this with my first novel, "Seven Murders In Sussex." I did the same for the second novel, but my writers group insisted I write more about the woman who disappears. The largest complaint from my reviewers is that the first two chapters are slow! Yikes!


message 29: by Richard (new)

Richard (rsmiraldi) | 14 comments Dale wrote: "I think this is, by far, the hardest task for any writer.

If you’re having trouble nailing your opening, you’re in luck: writer and WD contributor Jacob M. Appel offers up seven different approach..."


I wholeheartedly agree!


message 30: by Tony (last edited Nov 29, 2014 12:23PM) (new)

Tony Latham (tonylatham) | 27 comments Perhaps you've listened to Tom Occhipinti's American Writers Podcast. He gives an example of three different way of writing your opening; description, dialogue, or action. Three versions of the same opening. A great podcast. I wished he was still cranking them out.


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