Lance Carbuncle Q&A discussion
The Man Behind The Books
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When did you realise that you had a story inside you that was begging to come out?
Did you always have a knack for writing?
Did you always have a knack for writing?
Donna wrote: "Where did u grow up & what is ur background? Do others in ur family think or act like u?"
I grew up in Findlay, Ohio, a smaller and very conservative town in Northwest Ohio. I went to college at Bowling Green State University and the University of Toledo, also both in the same geographical area. So I spent a good deal of my earlier life in Ohio. After I was done packing my head full of useful knowledge I moved to Florida and have been here ever since.
As far as family, I am the youngest of three siblings. I don’t know that my siblings think and act like me but they definitely have warped senses of humor.
I grew up in Findlay, Ohio, a smaller and very conservative town in Northwest Ohio. I went to college at Bowling Green State University and the University of Toledo, also both in the same geographical area. So I spent a good deal of my earlier life in Ohio. After I was done packing my head full of useful knowledge I moved to Florida and have been here ever since.
As far as family, I am the youngest of three siblings. I don’t know that my siblings think and act like me but they definitely have warped senses of humor.
pjreads wrote: "What did you find especially helpful in Stephen King's On Writing?"
I love On Writing. It’s a great book for any writer to read. There’s so much great advice that it’s hard to say what is the most helpful. I guess that one of the things that sticks out for me is his point on what he called “Killing your babies” (or something like that). The point was that you may have put something in one of your stories that you are in love with - maybe the writing is great, maybe it touches on something very personal and dear to you, maybe it’s it’s funny as hell - but it doesn’t fit with the story. If you find yourself in that situation, you need to pull the passage out of the story, no matter how much you like it. I find myself pulling things out of my stories all of the time and it’s kind of painful to do. But, if it makes the story better, it has to be done.
Lori wrote: "When did you realise that you had a story inside you that was begging to come out?
Did you always have a knack for writing?"
I’ve been writing short stories since highschool. They are about as entertaining as a used condom. I wrote one novella about fifteen years back and never did anything with it. It needs to be reworked a lot and then it might be okay for release under another pseudonym (oops I just admitted that Lance Carbuncle is a pen name. Damn!). I started another book a couple of years later and abandoned it. Then I wrote Smashed. The story hit me like a bout of intestinal flu and it had to come out. It was just there and I helped birth it.
Did I always have a knack for writing? Yeah, I guess so. I got good grades in English classes and people seemed to laugh at my stuff. So I guess I had a knack for it.
Did you always have a knack for writing?"
I’ve been writing short stories since highschool. They are about as entertaining as a used condom. I wrote one novella about fifteen years back and never did anything with it. It needs to be reworked a lot and then it might be okay for release under another pseudonym (oops I just admitted that Lance Carbuncle is a pen name. Damn!). I started another book a couple of years later and abandoned it. Then I wrote Smashed. The story hit me like a bout of intestinal flu and it had to come out. It was just there and I helped birth it.
Did I always have a knack for writing? Yeah, I guess so. I got good grades in English classes and people seemed to laugh at my stuff. So I guess I had a knack for it.
"The story hit me like a bout of intestinal flu .."
Oohhh, such a nice visual of you, cramped and dripping sweat, pouring fluids out of both your ends, feverishly dragging your pen across paper...
Oohhh, such a nice visual of you, cramped and dripping sweat, pouring fluids out of both your ends, feverishly dragging your pen across paper...
Ha!!!
Lance, What is your favorite novel and who is your favorite author? (Since, your favorite author does not necessarily have to have written your favorite novel)
Lance, What is your favorite novel and who is your favorite author? (Since, your favorite author does not necessarily have to have written your favorite novel)

What was your major in college?
What jobs have you had?
Are you funny at work?
Who drew the picture of you that you use on GR and on the book cover?
Lori wrote: "Lance, What is your favorite novel and who is your favorite author? (Since, your favorite author does not necessarily have to have written your favorite novel)"
That’s hard to say. I think one of my favorite novels is Kurt Vonnegut’s Slapstick. I also really dig Stephen King’s The Stand and his Dark Tower series. And then, of course, there is Lord Timothy Dexter’s A Pickle for the Knowing Ones, which should be required reading in schools. Vonnegut is probably my favorite author
That’s hard to say. I think one of my favorite novels is Kurt Vonnegut’s Slapstick. I also really dig Stephen King’s The Stand and his Dark Tower series. And then, of course, there is Lord Timothy Dexter’s A Pickle for the Knowing Ones, which should be required reading in schools. Vonnegut is probably my favorite author
pjreads wrote: "Lance,
What was your major in college?
What jobs have you had?
Are you funny at work?
Who drew the picture of you that you use on GR and on the book cover?"
I have a BA in BS, a masters in phrenology and a PhD in cryptozoology. I once worked as a nude model in a blind art academy and was fired because I kept giggling and saying “it tickles” when the artists were “studying” me with their hands. I’m currently making my living as a competitive yodeler and cat food sampler. I am not funny at work. I lock myself in a room, eat cat food, and practice my yodeling. There is nothing funny about that.
I painted the image of me used on my book cover and as my profile image.
What was your major in college?
What jobs have you had?
Are you funny at work?
Who drew the picture of you that you use on GR and on the book cover?"
I have a BA in BS, a masters in phrenology and a PhD in cryptozoology. I once worked as a nude model in a blind art academy and was fired because I kept giggling and saying “it tickles” when the artists were “studying” me with their hands. I’m currently making my living as a competitive yodeler and cat food sampler. I am not funny at work. I lock myself in a room, eat cat food, and practice my yodeling. There is nothing funny about that.
I painted the image of me used on my book cover and as my profile image.
This thread is dedicated to the more serious questions. His influences, his writing methods, his background....