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(closed) BETA SWAP!! First 5 chapters or 12k
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Hello S.E. Dee,Well, I can help you right now. Just by the little you wrote. First in your dialogues don't use smart quotes (they express ideas like irony etc.), instead use straight ones. Here is a link below explaining it better.
http://www.baen.com/baen-faq#Manuscri...
Second when doing a dialogue instead of using quotes all the time, since it is a straight dialogue use -. for ex:
Amanda had urgent news to tell Jhon. He was on the couch distracted while watching TV .
- Jhon, dad is in the hospital!
- What? What happened?
And so on I think you got the idea. You can also see without having to explain too much who is Amanda and who is Jhon in the dialogue.
Well, I think that might help you for now, but what do you think about swaping projects? Mine is Mythopoeia book, so far I have the epilogue and the first 3 chapters done, 32k words.
If you're interested send me an e-mail to juliothobias@gmail.com and maybe we can help each other out and make our books a reality. What do you think?
With Gratitude,
Thobias Cerqueira
S.E wrote: "Hey Thobias, are you saying I should use a - instead of speechmarks?"Yes. But only in Dialogues. Nevertheless if you want to express things as the conversation happens, then you should just make a continues writing ex:
Amanda entered the room and said "Jhon, dad is in the hospital!" Jhon was watching TV and the moment he heard those words his world crumbled. He knew his father had a delicate condition and answered "What? What happened?"
You see how it goes. I hope I could help.
Thobias wrote: "S.E wrote: "Hey Thobias, are you saying I should use a - instead of speechmarks?"Yes. But only in Dialogues. Nevertheless if you want to express things as the conversation happens, then you shou..."
I have to say I've never seen a story written like that before except for Cormac Mc Carthy's The Road, and that's an exception. If you write like that and you're sure about it, then more power to you, but wouldn't that mean you'd have blocks and blocks of writing with no breaks? Where did you get this advice from? And do you know of any books that are actually written like that??
S.E wrote: "Thobias wrote: "S.E wrote: "Hey Thobias, are you saying I should use a - instead of speechmarks?"Yes. But only in Dialogues. Nevertheless if you want to express things as the conversation happen..."
Good reply! About authors yes and no. J.R.R. Tolkien and Bernard Conrwell in the Holy Grail series does exactly what I said to name a few in the English Language realm I know. For more examples I would have to go to world litterature to be more precise about other authors that uses this in their narratives like Saramago, Jorge Amado, Gabriel Garcia Marquez and so on.
If by block you mean paragraphs yes. However bear in mind that you're not going to use this way of expressing your character through the whole book. It means you have to know when to use both techniques whenever necessary in order to deliver a real and organized conversation between your characters.
Hope I could answer. FYI I don't have all the necessary information so I may be wrong this is just what I learned by being an English teacher and my experience as a reader. Maybe you know more than me. Follow whatever you think is right. I was just trying to help. I also hope my information could help you.
Grateful,
Thobias
Thanks Thobia, defo not my style but I'll look it up. I've never had an agent comment on it. If you have the time, do send me a chapter of your work do I can see how you lay yours out! If appreciate it a lot.
Regarding dialogue and dashes, it tends to be a european/hispanic thing. If you are writing uk or american, stick to quotation marks, and if you are uk, it should technically be ‘’ not “”.
Roughseasinthemed wrote: "Regarding dialogue and dashes, it tends to be a european/hispanic thing. If you are writing uk or american, stick to quotation marks, and if you are uk, it should technically be ‘’ not “”."
Wow really!? I got interested since I've learned otherwise. Do you have any material or link to present? Actually I've seen dashes with authors all over the word not so much in the U.S. though. I haven't seen many U.S. authors using it that is tue. But now to say that this is really a hispanic thing it's really an understatement for instance Jorge Amado and Saramago are not Hispanic. Chinese authors I've been following also use dashes and I've seen U.K. writes using it too.
About the quotes differences I beg to differ you should see DAW and Baen publishing requirements also take a look at the grammatic rules. Follow them even if others are not. Well at least this is my opinion.
I'm not really sure now, except about dashes being a hispanic thing it really isn't.
Maybe I should read more?
Thanks for sharing your knowledge.
Thobias
S.E wrote: "Thanks Thobia, defo not my style but I'll look it up. I've never had an agent comment on it. If you have the time, do send me a chapter of your work do I can see how you lay yours out! If appreciat..."Sure anytime.
Roughseasinthemed wrote: "Regarding dialogue and dashes, it tends to be a european/hispanic thing. If you are writing uk or american, stick to quotation marks, and if you are uk, it should technically be ‘’ not “”."
I've made a quick research I hope you guys enjoy. In the end depends on how you want to write there is really no right or wrong. But there are some cultural references that lead us to this enjoyable talk about conversation expression.
Here they are:
http://theeditorsblog.net/2010/12/08/...
http://writers.stackexchange.com/ques...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quotati...
Roughseasinthemed wrote: "Regarding dialogue and dashes, it tends to be a european/hispanic thing. If you are writing uk or american, stick to quotation marks, and if you are uk, it should technically be ‘’ not “”."
You're right regarding UK quotation marks but I'll never make that mistake again. Changing doubles to single when you have an American agent is a lot easier than going from singles to doubles, so now I always write using doubles and change it if I need to.
Thobias wrote: "Roughseasinthemed wrote: "Regarding dialogue and dashes, it tends to be a european/hispanic thing. If you are writing uk or american, stick to quotation marks, and if you are uk, it should techni..."
I think, for now I'll stick with what I'm used to and what's expected of me. Of all the 50 books on my Kindle, all use double quotes! When I have subbed to agents the only thing they have asked is that I use double quotation marks over single. But thank you for your input.
@ Thobias. I would suggest you look at style guides such as Chicago (American) and Hart's (British) rather than a quick internet search. So those are my sources that you asked for. Any editor and/or writer would be aware of them.Regarding dashes, you mentioned Gabriel Garcia Márquez. I think he qualified as hispanic. I'm currently reading La Tía Tula. I think that's Spanish. Sure two authors hardly provide the rule, but none of my British or American books have dashes for dialogue including Victorian classics. And to revert back to Hart's, they suggest quotation marks.
I agree there is no right or wrong, per se. But there are recommendations. And in the case of American, it is double quotation marks for dialogue. In the case of British, it is single.
@ S.E.
It's also an age thing. Many of us (Brits) were brought up using doubles. Singles are relatively new for fiction. Many people actually don't know the rules. Just like they have no clue about hyphenated words which change all the time. Eg, make-up in English, makeup in Americanese.
Only fifty books?! I was sufficiently interested some years ago to check British books published by trad houses. Guess what? Singles.
Roughseasinthemed wrote: "@ Thobias. I would suggest you look at style guides such as Chicago (American) and Hart's (British) rather than a quick internet search. So those are my sources that you asked for. Any editor and/o..."Yeah I'm very picky and don't keep books I don't like on my Kindle - well written or not. I'm strict when it comes to personal preferences. If you like over 50 books on your Kindle, more power to you! I can't even think of 50 movies I like and they take less time to digest. My Kindle is also the first one Amazon released. I don't know how it differs from the newer ones but to have more than 50 books, no thanks.
To this day I still suggest to my fellow writers that they use doubles unless they only plan on subbing to British agents. The switch from single to double just isn't worth the heartache. You can't just do a control find as words like cant, don't, won't and possessives get changed. It's both time consuming and easily avoidable by just using doubles first.
I don't have a kindle, just the app on my Halpad. I have a load of books to review, as well as the occasional book for pleasure. Sometimes I need to go back to them. Plus, I have reference books too.If people are self pubbing then I always give them the option. If it was me, I would use singles. But, author's choice if they want to mix styles.
Roughseasinthemed wrote: "I don't have a kindle, just the app on my Halpad. I have a load of books to review, as well as the occasional book for pleasure. Sometimes I need to go back to them. Plus, I have reference books to..."Yeah do whatever works better for you. Especially if you're trying to get publishers attention.
About Marquez, yes, but it seems it is as said before. European/Hispanic the only thing is that is written also by the Portuguese, the Russian, Polish and others (I'm from a Portuguese speaking community and not European). Oh and the Portuguese is a different community in all matters, I really ask you guys not to confuse us. Personally I enjoy very much Hispanic writers, although putting all the Hispanic countries into a single written community is a bit of a generalization (like I just did now ha, ha, ha), but they do share a lot and I can see why people far from the Hispanic community would get confused. From example Argentinian literature is really different from the one made in Cuba and they are all Hispanics. I'm not an expertise, but would be glad to share the little I know.
About the countries that uses dashes and quotes is all in the quick search I made. I'm definitely going to take a look at Chicago and Hart's it seems to be some vital information I need for me to enter in the English speaking literature world. Mine is a different reality so I have to adjust myself pronto. Thank you for sharing such good advices I'll definitely follow.
@ Roughseasinthemed Oh the the two writers I mentioned. It was just an example there is a list here in the link you can check that is far more writers than just two LOL.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...
Just to name few. I think this makes clear my previous statement.
Keep writing and enjoy,
Thobias



Just re-edited the first five chapters of my NA sci-fi story, CAPTCHA, and needed another set of eyes to point out any mistakes I may have made.
If you also have 12k words you want me to look over, I'm more than happy to do a swap. We might even get invested enough to read to the end, who knows...
Short Twitter Pitch
"After a virus outbreak, Lyken must choose to save either the last humans or the synthetics he and everyone else has turned into." #pitmad#SF
Please e-mail me at: Shaydee7@hotmail.co.uk
Excerpt:
1
Nanites had clumped together all over the cyborg’s naked body, producing metal tumours the size of crystal balls. Someone had shot it clean in the head. The growths would’ve made it slow and docile, even at night, and where the synthetic flesh had tried to heal over the tumours, its legs were crippled.
Grade five crap; not worth a damned thing.
As I touched it with my foot, Sia smacked my leg, but I didn’t care. “How long do you think it’s been here?” I asked.
“A day, maybe?” She waved a fly from her face then examined the borg through the slits of her eyes. “What a waste.”
“How is it a waste?”
“Someone left it here.”
I shrugged. “So?” The borg’s skin was webbed in silvery veins and crawling with maggots. “It’s worthless.”
“Yeah but it’s probably worth the bullet used to kill it,” she said. “I would’ve taken it.”
I wiped the sweat from my brow. “Should we take it?”
“No, it’s not our bullet.” She turned to the giant hole in the wall and stared out at Ashmouth City.
I stopped studying the bloody mess sprawled across the rubble and plucked at my sweat-drenched top. The sun had been fierce for the past three days and I had the tan to prove it. The smell, too. “Let’s take a break,” I said, nearing the hole.
We sat down to drink some water and admire the century old abandoned buildings. I imagined the place flooded with people and wondered if Sia was thinking the same. But she just seemed to be sitting there, frowning as she twirled a finger around the tight coils of her hair. “What’re you doing for your birthday?” I asked.
“You know I don’t celebrate it…”
“I bought you something.”
“No you haven’t.”
“I have.”
“What is it?”
“It’s big.”
“And long?” She laughed. “I don’t want it.”
“Why not? You’ll like this stretch limo, champagne pops out the top.”
She grinned.
I was testing the water. We’d been ‘off’ for a week and a bit. I couldn’t remember what we’d argued about before she left Camp, or if we’d even argued, but since she’d returned we hadn’t seen much of each other. Not that we needed a reason to fall out: sometimes Sia just wanted to make her sister happy. “What would you like?” I asked.
She cocked a knee and her grin withered. “Money.”
“And you’ll get some. We’ll bag a few borgs today, I can feel it.”
“Feelings aren’t enough. Karis has only two boosters left and this trailer loan – ”
“Boosters? What happened to buying the vaccine?”
“The trailer is a money-sucker.” She sighed. “Lyken?”
I looked at her. “What? You want me to lend you some creds?”
“No…never mind, just help me hunt. The trailer is my problem.”
An oversized problem she didn’t need; it was only her and her sister. If it wasn’t for the trailer, I reckoned she’d be half way to buying Karis a level one vaccine. Not to say a level one was the best option, but it would at least tide them over for the next three years and was better than blowing money on boosters.
She stood. “Should we go?”
“Yeah.” I didn’t bother press her, she would talk when she was ready. “Where do you want to head next?”
“Let’s try Bartholomew’s Hospital.”
#