Much better than last time. You should've, though, added this to your previous query so people can see the changes. This has changed substantially from the last time I remember reading it.
I do suggest, though, that you eliminate the equivocation, unless that is a critical character element. 'Beaten her around' should just be 'beaten and controlled'. 'Fairly certain' doesn't help, particularly in the query where you want every word to be dynamic.
Also, is Master really _helping_ Valeriya or is he taking over the job? 'Giving a hand' implies assistance, but I feel like he would take the job over.
Just so you know, 117K words is a bit past the high end for debut novels; you might want to consider slimming down.
I do suggest, though, that you eliminate the equivocation, unless that is a critical character element. 'Beaten her around' should just be 'beaten and controlled'. 'Fairly certain' doesn't help, particularly in the query where you want every word to be dynamic.
Also, is Master really _helping_ Valeriya or is he taking over the job? 'Giving a hand' implies assistance, but I feel like he would take the job over.
Just so you know, 117K words is a bit past the high end for debut novels; you might want to consider slimming down.