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A Solivagant on the Inselberg
message 23101:
by
Hallie
(new)
Aug 01, 2019 03:54AM
Well, my fever went up during the night, but it broke. Although I have no appetite and feel like I'm going to throw up and faint.
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Brother: Finally! Friday!Me: My birthday is next Friday :) :) :) :)
Brother: Stop grinning, Nagasaki 9/11. Millions of people died in two different countries.
Me: But I was born.
Brother: Look at the number of people you killed!
Me: Like Hitler?
Brother: Hitler was clever; you're a dumbass.
Me: You're the dumbass about to get killed by your baby sister, whose birthday is next Friday.
Brother: How old are you again?
Me: 18.
Brother: What?! You?! 18?! *rolls on the floor laughing*
Me: The first and only adult truly from this century in our family, mind you.
Brother: And that's why this century is the worst in the history of mankind.
"I'm a motherf---in' train wreck
I don't wanna be too much
But I don't wanna miss your touch
And you don't seem to give a f---
I don't wanna keep you waiting
But I do just what I have to do
And I might not be the one for you
But you ain't about to have no boo."
~ Boyfriend, Ariana Grande
*sighs* Stuck going shopping again.
I also cancelled my library subscription :(
Believe it or not, I think there are super good clothes here. I just got three: a pink shirt for that high-waisted jeans I bought before (Mum thinks it would be nice to wear that on Friday), a denim jacket (which I want to wear on Friday and have to wanted to have one since forever), and a top that with that newspaper print design. It's super cool and Mum loves it so much. The best part is that it goes so well with my major at uni.
Tsk. Turns out today's my aunt's birthday.... So that's one person I absolutely adore and two people I don't particularly like who are born on August 3rd.
According to research, the solution to anxiety is compassion.
Which means I am going to take anxious feelings all the way to my grave. Or it will take me.
I don't remember being this pissed at everything. My charger keeps acting weird and my earphones just randomly decided to stop working in one ear, and I'm so pissed.
My brother's just like manage without it for few days, but I cannot live without music. I'm going to steal his headphones if he does not get me my own.
Hallie wrote: "Alia ~you are not your anxiety~ wrote: "Hi Hallie :) gosh darn it been way too inactive on gr lately but I now hold a bunch of support positions on mental health discords and love them!! I waved ..."
Sorry to ask about your least favorite topic! Haha no worries! You're not missing much, drivers ed was so boring, but I passed at least!
On the plus side I just had my first day at the new school and already love it ^^ Feels like I'm going back to middle school when people actually cared about one another and I was active here... we will see what the homework load's like though.
Alia ~you are not your anxiety~ wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Alia ~you are not your anxiety~ wrote: "Hi Hallie :) gosh darn it been way too inactive on gr lately but I now hold a bunch of support positions on mental health discords and love th..."Oh, that's fine! But I want to learn driving sooooooo badly that I think I am missing a lot. Yay you passed! :)
That's wonderful! I'm so glad that you like it! Hopefully the homework load will be manageable, and I hope you have an amazing time there! :D
I know this is a bad thing to say, but I don't care. I hope my parents and brother get hit by a truck.
Hallie wrote: "Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Yep!They are!
Grow Up and Mirror. There was one more, but I forgot its name."
Nope!
They are not!
Ooh, nice! Grow Up's awesome tb..."
Nope!
They are not!
Still, nope.
xD
Slr, though...
Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Yep!They are!
Grow Up and Mirror. There was one more, but I forgot its name."
Nope!
They are not!
Ooh, nice! Grow ..."
Yep!
They are!
Probably.
xP
"We said our last goodbye
Won't you stay the night?
Even just for a moment
Perfect night, pretend we're fine
Even just for a moment
Nowhere over, we're still not over
Pull me closer, I need closure
This is our last goodbye
Stay the night, even just for a moment
Even just for a moment."
~ Just For A Moment, Griffin, Iselin
Everyone refuses to buy me earphones. They're just like go a few days without it, but I'm in an environment where I really need them to block out stuff to prevent myself from going and killing myself, and none of them understand.
I'm not asking for Bluetooth earphones or whatever that will leave them broke. Just buy me earphones that work in both ears and is compatible with my phone.
I also need it to wade off my creepy watchman, who, even though is fired, still stands in front of our house every single day.
You haven't in the past, and you won't I'm the future. Just once in the present so that I can have at least one instance I can look back at before I say my family destroyed my mental health and continued to encourage me as I destroyed myself.
I've already lost way too many things that mattered to me. Don't let me lose the last few things that keep me alive.
![Jaxon(Jax)[They-He] | 4642 comments](https://images.gr-assets.com/users/1749715398p1/46156450.jpg)
:-( awe Hallie *hugs* I wuv you so much
Come on people, it's just earphones. Stop acting like I'm asking you to sell me your ancestral property or something.
☯Phoenix~They/them wrote: ":-( awe Hallie *hugs* I wuv you so much"*hugs back* I wuv you too!
Totally not throwing a tantrum here.
:-)That's my life Hallie
For some reason, that comment makes me feel better after days of feeling nothing!
because you deserve to feel better
Alex!!!!!!! I was just looking at your journal debating whether or not I should post something there :D *hugs tight*
Hallie wrote: "Yep!They are not!
Probably."
Nope!
True :D
Yaayy!! :D
Still, nope.
Alex, I just don't want to say something stupid on there.Deepthi:
Yep!
Whaat on earth?! I'm pretty sure I said they are! Goodreads is sabotaging my posts!!!
We don't know for sure.
Hallie wrote: "Alex, I just don't want to say something stupid on there.Deepthi:
Yep!
Whaat on earth?! I'm pretty sure I said they are! Goodreads is sabotaging my posts!!!
We don't know for sure."
it's okay!!!
Alex ~They/them~ ~Annabeth Chase is a legend~ wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Alex, I just don't want to say something stupid on there.Deepthi:
Yep!
Whaat on earth?! I'm pretty sure I said they are! Goodreads is sabotaging my posts!!!
We don't know for su..."
How have you been, though? Oh, think of a way for me to effectively punish homophobes/transphobes/aphobes/basically any person within or outside the LGBT+ community for being a jerk towards sweet LGBT people.
So after a tantrum, I finessed myself a pair of earphones :)
My brother also think I'm troubling the entire family by existing, and that only made me cry more, but he'll regret saying that :)
I'll make him wish he could take it back :)
In other news, my one of my weird classmates from my old school is trying to poke her nose in my business to spread rumours or patronise me, but H got to me in time to be a bitch when she tried contacting me.
So now she's just there like, "I've always hated that bitch Hallie. Like she is soooo annoying."While H and S are dying just thinking of this whole situation.
it's personal
Books mentioned in this topic
Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 (other topics)Lore (other topics)
The Glass Menagerie (other topics)
The Great Gatsby (other topics)
Orlando (other topics)
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