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A Solivagant on the Inselberg
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[deleted user]
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Jul 13, 2019 07:46AM
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As in lollipop, the confectionary?
I'm afraid I don't completely agree. I'd love to elucidate, but I'm trying to do something else at the moment.Yes, lollipop, the confectionary.
No worries, looking forward to your reposnse/clarification
Party
I don't think I'm going to end up writing everything that happened yesterday, so I'll just put a few bullet points that I want to record.
β’ When we reached, I had to face the "Oh my god, you've grown so much! You were only this much before! You've changed! You look so different!" Never going to understand how I look different because literally everyone else say I look pretty much the same; just taller. Weird..... The thing is I haven't really changed much at all. I used to look like a complete dork when I was younger and I still look like the same dork just stretched out a bit. Oh, and the where is *insert brother's name*? And the whole comparison shit.
β’ Once again, I was confused as to which brother is which. They aren't even twins but they have such similar names that my brother and I keep getting confused. Which is the older one and which is the younger one?
β’ The wife (kid's mother) thought I was 2-4 years younger than I am..... I was the age she initially thought I was when I first met her and that was two years ago.
β’ The kid liked me a bit too much. Shit! He kept looking at me and I thought it was because I look so ugly and he probably wasn't used to that much ugliness, but he kept coming over and shaking my hand. Everyone kept saying, "Ooooh he likes her!" while I sat there trying to telepathically tell him to run away because I drown little kids.
β’ My cousin reached an hour and a half after us, so with a dying phone, I had no entertainment for what seemed like forever. Her daughter wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone, but everyone kept calling and poking her, and I legitimately sympathised for the kid. They knew she isn't in the mood and wants to be left alone for a bit, but they still continued to annoy her.
β’ My cousin's husband said I'm taller while my cousin said I'm thinner ("I didn't think it was possible, but have you become more thin??!?!")
β’ You have no idea how hard it was to explain to them that I don't want the cake, and that they should probably give it to someone else. Like the birthday boy or my niece.
β’ I was outside looking down from the fourth floor of the building and getting terrified because I don't really like heights while my dad was talking to that annoying lady I despise. Oh, turns out my own grandma hated her from the bottom of her heart, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually have something in common with my grandma other than, you know, the family.
β’ Anyway, I was outside and the kid's father came to me and asked if I ate. When I said yes, he asked why my brother didn't come. I said that he had to work. Then he took a few steps forward before walking back and saying, "Sorry, but I forgot your name." I told him my name knowing that he would only forget it again. Well, he does remember my brother's, so he would definitely know what the first letter is.
β’ I was still standing there when the kid's father's younger brother came to talk to my dad, and he sent his wife over to talk to me since I was alone.
β’ The problem is that the wife speaks a strange mixture of Irish and Welsh, and I suck at both even when they are separate. One would think I'd be able to understand better, but it was hard to follow because she was speaking a mixture of two languages I'm supposed to know but absolutely suck at.
β’ So as she began to talk about how the journalism major worked at wherever she worked or studied (I did not quite understand which), and I just stood there nodding as though I understood everything when I was so..... Confuzzled. Next time, I'm putting up a "Don't talk to me because I don't like talking, but if you really feel sorry and think you must, please speak in English." The one thing I did understand was: "There was an absence of a doctor and a journalist in this extended family."
β’ And then somebody came and asked if I was almost done with the course. Uh.... I haven't even started going to uni yet? Let's wait for three years, shall we?
β’ They even packed food for my brother even though he had already eaten.
β’ The younger brother asked me something about my major, and my mum happened to be there to give out information that didn't need to be said :/ I kind of yelled at her in front of him because I was already cranky, and this same situation over and over again is so annoying.
β’ We reached home super late.
β’ Turns out my brother has a fever :'(
Ok, from taking your comments regarding perception and experience of a state, looking at the events through my understanding of your preception of things and hence your lenses, yes, this sounds quite gresome.
However, I won't be be able to give full justice to your understanding of your surrounding and experiences, so my sincere apologies, I was extremely shy until about 16 years, I don't know what happened but I become quite out going and loud, at 19 years old I travelled in Asia with a bunch of strangers for about 3 months.
Plus I live in East London, it's loud, congested and at times a bit clostophobic, so I may have even been comfortable at the party you mentioned (I suppose the fact that I a job as a facility at conferences would be a factor too), plus I love learning languages, so the whole Cymri/Irish thing would have been my cuppa tea.
But to conclude, that's my condition now, at 15 years old I was a totally different and shy person, I had to think about it a bit, however in some ways I think I do understand your horrible at last night's party (despite the contrast in ages, up bringing, geographical location and experiences)
However, I won't be be able to give full justice to your understanding of your surrounding and experiences, so my sincere apologies, I was extremely shy until about 16 years, I don't know what happened but I become quite out going and loud, at 19 years old I travelled in Asia with a bunch of strangers for about 3 months.
Plus I live in East London, it's loud, congested and at times a bit clostophobic, so I may have even been comfortable at the party you mentioned (I suppose the fact that I a job as a facility at conferences would be a factor too), plus I love learning languages, so the whole Cymri/Irish thing would have been my cuppa tea.
But to conclude, that's my condition now, at 15 years old I was a totally different and shy person, I had to think about it a bit, however in some ways I think I do understand your horrible at last night's party (despite the contrast in ages, up bringing, geographical location and experiences)
I'm not trying to say it was horrible or whatnot; I was trying to say that I didn't want to be there and as I expected, it turned out to be one of those frustrating situations that I despise.However, I can definitely understand if someone else at the same party enjoyed it. My point is that it wasn't for me, and since I already knew that, I should not have been forced to be there. Going there was a huge inconvenience for me because I was elsewhere and had rush back home by shelling out way too much money, and for the most pointless reason as well. I had a dentist appointment two days ago, but I wasn't allowed to come home like that, and that was most certainly a lot more important than this ever will be. So the whole experience was more of a waste of time, money, and energy - none of which I'd line to waste over something this unsatisfying.
I'm from London as well. I do think I was brought up differently, so if you think you would have enjoyed it - well, good for you. Thanks for being understanding, though.
Just wanted to mention that this is a journal I maintain for my own thoughts and records because I can't keep a physical one; it's supposed to be some kind of cathartic release of bottled up thoughts and emotions in my head. So if something doesn't make sense to you or if it doesn't seem right, please forgive me, and ignore me. Also, for the same reason, I really wouldn't expect a response or acknowledgement to every single thing I say here. Some are rhetorical and sometimes you might not like the content. If that's the case, feel free to ignore me.
Aaand I'm sleeping on the settee tonight!
No worries, will bear that in mind, enjoy the settee.
Just an FYI - parties ain't my thing, I would rather be in a nice park enjoying the scenery or go for a walk around Epping Forest...I am an introverted people person (if that makes sense)...
Bodrul, that does make sense.Hey Deepthi! :D *waves back*
Whatcha' doin'? How's your day going?
Early birds catches the worm...its a Sunday and you guys are up early...
Bodrul wrote: "Early birds catches the worm...its a Sunday and you guys are up early..."xD
It's 12.14 rn in India lmao.
Ah, it's 7.48 here in London and it has started to rain..
The Silent Killer
As my brother is sick, I slept on the settee in the living room. I actually like sleeping there, which is weird to other people, considering it's old, wooden, has no cushion and has nails sticking out from it to ruin clothes. It's actually comfortable there. The options were get a fever from my brother, or sleep on the floor, or sleep with my dad, or on the settee, and of course the last one was my choice. My dad wasn't happy about it, but I was.
Obviously, I couldn't sleep, so I tried to watch Game of Thrones for a while. That's when I heard someone knock my neighbour's door. Judging by the knocking, it sounded like my creepy watchman. And I was right - I heard him call out "Madam!" It was around half past ten, and since everyone else in my house was already asleep, I didn't bother to get out and look through the peephole. But he kept knocking - no, banging the neighbour's door. For nearly half an hour, he kept banging it so hard, and I'm not sure what he was trying to achieve by doing that. Since no one was answering for so long in spite of that loud banging, I wouldn't think it's rational to continue because it was already late, and he will most likely have better luck in the morning. If it was something important, they weren't answering anyway, so as he continued to bang it, he kept disturbing me. *shrugs* This guy just does not know when to take the hint and stop.
I woke up a couple of times after I fell asleep, but I remember the dream I had just before I woke up for good. It was really cool and I'm so relieved that it wasn't a nightmare. I'm going to put it down here just in case it comes in handy for future murders I mean whosaidanything.
In the dream, I killed a girl. I don't remember why, but no shocker that I did it. It just seems like something I would do anyway. So I disguised myself and killed the girl, but the cops fished out a camera footage of me committing the crime. However, they don't know who it is because I disguised myself pretty well. They came to my class at uni and told us that they would show us the footage the next day, and we were to tell them if the person resembled someone we have seen. I freaked so much because I was afraid I'd get caught, and of course I contemplated my usual solution to everything - suicide. Things are a little blank, but somehow I was alive the next day to see the footage. And I was impressed with myself. Nobody recognized me, and no one even had the slightest suspicion. I remember that the investigation started on Friday and that was when they came to my class, and the footage was shown on Saturday.
The investigation continued in my area, and I said I was interested in helping them out. I would have been interested even if I wasn't the killer, but since I was, it just gave me access to all their leads and made it easier to misguide them. I started leaving false clues and misleading them. My entire family, including my grandma and other relatives from my parents hometown, were in the dream, and they were all shocked. They kept lamenting and exclaiming how heinous it was, and I just sat there nodding like, "Uh uh! I'm such a genius :)" I sent mysterious texts from different phones, planted other evidence leading to a different direction, and when all these clues were discovered, the media made such a fuss and I helped. It didn't even look fishy because that it supposed to be my future job. Unfortunately, I couldn't see a concrete end to that dream, but just before I woke up, I was introducing the detective to my cousin, and trying to manipulate the situation to secure my innocence. I even pointed out that I had the same bracelet the murderer was wearing in the footage (because I was the murderer), showed it to them, got them to contact the store that sold it to me so that they could get a false lead when the store said that some man had ordered it a few weeks prior to the murder. All staged by moi.
It was so good! I wonder if I won.
And I got my phone back. It finally has its power button and I got a phone case to prevent it from falling down again. It's plain, so the store owner wasn't very happy that I picked a transparent one, but that's the only one that would help. Besides, I could try and customize it (albeit I'd ruin it). Now it feels strange having to turn it on and off with the power button because I've gotten so used to the app, but at least my battery isn't draining.
Hey Deepthi! Well, the day just started, so I've got nothing to say. How's your day? :)
Hallie wrote: "Hey Deepthi! Well, the day just started, so I've got nothing to say. How's your day? :)"Oh, okay..
Hope you have a good day :)
Sorta okay, I guess...
Deepthi wrote: "Hallie wrote: "Hey Deepthi! Well, the day just started, so I've got nothing to say. How's your day? :)"Oh, okay..
Hope you have a good day :)
Sorta okay, I guess..."
Thanks! Albeit it's a Sunday and the past couple of days haven't been in my favour, so I don't really have any hopes.
Sorta okay? I suppose that's better than "Uhhh... Terrible", so I'll say I'm glad, but I do hope it turns to "My day is going great!" :)
Coffee Boy started a fashion Instagram xD
Oooh, who is this coffee boy, love is in the air...
Lol it's not like that. Just a guy I met during university entrance.
Wow, well done, now I see the connection between the convo with your Welsh Irish aunt and ur course
Definitely not my cousin, lol. I don't really know how they are related to me, which is why I didn't use any terms while referring to them. Just kid's father, kid's grandma and so on.
Something so satisfying about listening to MCR at 3 in the morning.
I wish I had such energy, such a put off going to Paddington in the morning for work...
I don't think it's energy, but rather insomnia.
Ah, well I hope you evenutally got some sleep. I wanted to do English Language when I was considering uni course, I ended up doing Economics (safe option), how comes you chose English lit and Journalism? And which Uni are u considering or have been accepted for? I was told Queen Mary's in London was meant to be have a very good English department.
I did. It's been two years since I last studied Economics, but I always found it too dry for me. Well, long story short, I've been reading since when I was 2 years old and writing for nearly 10 years. I don't really have many interests that I can pursue, and since I love English and literature, that's what I chose. I'd rather not say which uni I got into.
Lol, yep, Economics is dry unless something like Nissan pulling out of the UK happens (amazingly I did mention it in my dissertation) or if you read a book like Freakonomics, cool, I assumed you were a writer, no worries regarding mentioning ur Uni.
One of my friends wanted to do Economics if she didn't get into law school, but I couldn't understand why she was interested.
Erm, tbh, economics isn't that bad, it's quite useful in terms of Analytical skills and understanding geo-politics to an extent. I am not great at maths but i found my degree very interesting, unfortunately I didn't do anything with my degree, ended up working in the NHS and now work for a tech company but i did enjoy the course, but I went to UEL which I found rubbish and kinda lame...but you live and learn...lol.
Its not for everyone, if I was go back in time and decide on what to study at Uni, I would do an English course, something linguistics based or a social science like Anthropology, I am glad I did the course though but feel I would have found something else more enjoyable
I'm glad you don't regret it completely because that would have been horrible.
Well, my approach to life is: everything happens for a reason from the place I end up working to the people I meet, so I try not to regret anything unless I am in the wrong, basically I can't change the past but I can change the future.
the other thing, it also helps me from over thinking situations and making them more complicated than they are, and obviously helps with stress too, there is an Arabic saying which goes: 'Tie your camel and than trust in God'. I can only do what I am able to do...the rest is out of my hands...
Well, it's nice that you have such approaches to life. Mine are very different, so I can't say much.
Hey Deepthi! Sorry, I didn't see your post!
@Hallie so, what's your approach?
Possibly in contrast to yours. More on the pessimistic/dark side.
Hallie wrote: "Hey Deepthi! Sorry, I didn't see your post!"Npppp ^^
How is chuu? :D
Got my English and Math marks today!
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