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Song and a Smile
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Ooh plenty!Bruce Springsteen, Downbound Train: "Now I work down at the carwash where all it ever does is rain."
Kirsty MacColl, New England: "I put you on a pedestal, you put me on the pill."
Or just about anything by Ian Dury and the Blockheads:
Mod
Bruce Springsteen, Downbound Train: "Now I work down at the carwash where all it ever does is rain."
Kirsty MacColl, New England: "I put you on a pedestal, you put me on the pill."
O..."
Nice!
Mod
Josie's on a vacation far away
Come around and talk it over
So many things that I want to say
You know I like my girls a little bit older
I just wanna use your love tonight
I don't wanna lose your love tonight
Well, at least he's honest. Sleazy, but honest.
And then, to add insult to injury, in the next verse he entreats:
Stay the night but keep it undercover
For an awful song, this gets a lot of airplay where I live.
Shudder.
I specially like "The Hole in the Elephant's Bottom".Jeremy Irons has a short dead-pan rendition on
YouTube
but I prefer the fuller version (probably close to an original music-hall performance) that was printed in "Navy News" in November 2004:
The Elephant's Bottom
My ambition's to go on the stage
And now my ambition I've gotten.
In pantomime I'm all the rage,
As the hole in the elephant's bottom.
The manager says "It's all balls"
But somehow I manage to spot 'em
And wink at the whores in the stalls
Through the hole in the elephant's bottom.
I'm a lover of beautiful girls,
Yes, ladies I've always been hot on.
I turn round and wink at the stuff in the stalls
Through the hole in the elephant's bottom.
My part doesn't have any words,
So it really can't be forgotten;
I simply drop property turds
Through the hole in the elephant's bottom.
The fellow who plays the front part,
As an actor is just bloody rotten;
He simply does nothing but fart,
And I am the elephant's bottom.
Two pockets I've cut in the cloth,
For two bottles of beer when I've got 'em.
Folks laugh as I blow out the froth
Through the hole in the elephant's bottom.
There are many more words in this song
But I'm sorry to say I've forgot 'em.
If you've found this song just a bit too long
You can all kiss the elephant's bottom.
(Add a link if you like.)
I'll start with:
...she's so fine, there's no tellin' where the money went...
-Robert Palmer's Simply Irresistable