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Aliens from Outer Space Ask Earthlings Questions
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Re: Question 01It's because of peer pressure and fashion. It has no functional purpose.
Dear Alien X2478,Actually, in this case it's because I tripped and fell and bumped my head.
But I'm surprised: I thought you'd have more important questions to ask.
Douglas wrote: "Dear Alien X2478,Actually, in this case it's because I tripped and fell and bumped my head.
But I'm surprised: I thought you'd have more important questions to ask."
Actually, for our research, the odd behavior of primitive cultures is important for us. I've decided that instead of Alien X2478, you can call me Z28Q.
Thanks. I'll have more questions later after we've finished destroying another planet that was not cooperative.
I think I should apologize. Apparently, I used the wrong protocol, and began questioning without a formal introduction. I'm not sure about the order and placing of the posting ritual. So then for those coming here at this posting ritual site who didn't participate at the other ritual posting, I'll repeat my introduction here. I hope this is acceptable.
I am an anthropologist from a planet about 12 light-years away from your planet.
I have not yet gotten my full degree in Primitive Planet Studies. So I think the closest translation I can give for my endeavors is that in the way that you look at things I am preparing a thesis and research data base for my master's and PhD degrees.
Unfortunately, the board rejected my previous study of another planet. So I've been assigned to study this one which should be much easier to understand. I hope.
I am especially interested in the functioning of your split brain as pertains to analytical, spatial and emotional separation, and subconscious defense mechanisms. It seems to be an odd thing that you are usually unaware of why you do things, and have bizarre motivations for many acts.
Everything here is a puzzle to me. I hope my understanding will improve, and my report won't be rejected again by the Galactic University.
You can call me ZQuteMale, or just Z28 for short. My actual name translates in English to 107 of your letters and symbols for unknown sounds and pictures (it's a long story), although transliteration is very arbitrary. But anyway, I'm supposed to remain anonymous, my teachers tell me for best results.
Well, I'm off to a slow start. I have to think about this more. I might consult one of your psychology books (except that they seem like the authors are very confused even about their own selves -- yeah, it's a puzzle alright [is that the right slang -- not sure].
Oh, yes, then, Hi
Laura wrote: "Hiii"Hiiii.
Interesting. Is that like skiing which has two "i"'s? Or is it for emphasis or imitating the duration of the sound that a bird would make if it were a greeting call? I suppose it's just exclamatory.
Now, when I do a response, do I add just one extra "i" or are the number of i's directly proportional to the exuberance to be expressed? I'm not sure I can deduce the exact nuance for this greeting.
Could I say then:
Hi [where if "i" is concatenated n times, n being an integer then Hi([n=3]) = Hiii
Hi(9) and do you ski?
You guys have no idea how confusing this thread is to me....
But ENJOY!
But ENJOY!
Bree wrote: "You guys have no idea how confusing this thread is to me....But ENJOY!"
Yes, I can see now that it's very confusing. I'm confused too. Earth is a very strange place. I don't think my report for school about Primitive Planets is going to be acceptable. Oh well, I guess I'm never going to get my PhD in Primitive Planet studies. I'll have to go home to my home planet and won't be allowed to travel to Earth again (Well, not exactly -- but travel is very expensive, and I won't be able to afford it, especially if I don't have a job as a professor at the Galactic University.)
Well, perhaps someone can help me with this topic. Many people on Earth have misconceptions about Aliens from Outer Space. Maybe someone here has a really short short-story about an alien encounter that they can share here. Maybe I can add it as a reference in my thesis paper. I need Earth writing references for my term paper. I'm not doing very well in school, and I think I'm going to get expelled. This is the second time that my report on a Primitive Planet has gotten bad grades. I don't think I'll ever be a good Anthropologist. Humans are too strange to understand -- even worse than the inhabitants on the last planet I studied. Oh, sorry, I didn't mean that as an insult. I guess it's just me. I'm not much of a student. But my family wants me to be an Anthropologist.
Oh and Hi or is it "hiya"
Greetings, Earthlings. Ask this alien anything!
Z28Q wrote: "Many people on Earth have misconceptions about Aliens from Outer Space. Maybe someone here has a really short short-story about an alien encounter that they can share here. Maybe I can add it as a reference in my thesis paper...."Well, maybe I have one. It's not exactly about "misconceptions" or maybe it is. I don't know but I don't think I have anything else on this topic. But if your Doctoral advisor thinks it's bad then don't include it in you presentation or whatever it is that you're required to do. Um so...
The Excitable Arts
By Douglas Gilbert
Most of the guys had said that the stars were just far away suns. Nothing romantic in a hot ball of gas, nor in ethereal talk. Unexciting.
But Diana had wondered about the romantic poets she had read on the internet. Some were unknown in more than one way, but reachable if a person were crazy enough to take a chance on a stranger with pretensions to be a broken-vernacular Shakespeare. But she liked the most mysterious one who was unreachable, she thought. She’d felt him whenever she could stay in to read a verse or two.
Diana hadn’t planned to go out. She had been real comfortable in bed with her dog Charlie and her laptop, reading romantic poetry, mostly by herself since he didn’t seem that interested, nuzzling under her hand so she would pet him. Charlie was a black Labrador retriever, although Diana always said that when people talk about “black” dogs, their perception is from the black fur, but Charlie’s skin was actually gray. He had been a good lap dog, willing to stay in for a snuggle unless there were things to do.
Unreal things had begun when Diana stumbled upon a certain list of links. Charlie looked up with his nose on the screen. He made a truncated growl followed by a flick of his tongue like he was lapping up water: a sort of gurr-ick and a cough sound or something else.
“Whaa…?” she said. “Charlie, did you say ‘click’?”
“Erreff, woof,” he said. Charlie jumped off the bed and fetched a thin stick near his bowl where he had sequestered it.
When he jumped back onto the bed with the stick in his mouth, she said, “Give!” But he refused to surrender it, turned his head to the side, used the stick to push keys on the keyboard, and with his paw turned the scroll wheel on the mouse. The screen changed.
A star chart appeared. “Welcome to the ‘Mystery Poets’ Official Website,” it said.
Charlie scrolled down the page. He said, “Woof.”
“You want me to go here?” she asked in a quivering voice.
“Weff,” he said.
“Oh God, I’m going crazy,” she said. “You said ‘yes’, didn’t you…”
He barked like a dog and spoke like a dog. “Woof,” he uttered in normal canine parlance.
“Oh geez, I need fresh air,” she said. But she wrote down the information from the screen. There was a meeting that night of “The Romantic Poets Mystery Society,” and pets were welcome. Her favorite mystery poet was listed as a featured speaker. She ran out the door imagining what she thought his voice was like: “You undress in my river and I kiss your thigh…,” she conjured of him.
Drifting into the night, she soon found herself standing in a clearing with Charlie and the fallen yellow leaves at her feet. Was it not the season for seasoning lust into love, a rare spice he sprinkled into his verses. They had corresponded a little and with a little luck, something could be born out. It was the season. She stared at the stars and remembered, “The romp of love beguiles, a playful horse; my heart a rider gripping spirit’s trip…”
Charlie barked. A large globe hovered over the trees, and a beam of light lifted them into the sky. Seemed a poetic mystery. She met him in the conference room on board the ship.
With the seasoning of desire there would be a hybrid of lust and love born in excitement.
END
Lumina wrote: "Greetings, Earthlings. Ask this alien anything!"Why are you hiding? The News says you don't exist. A really grand demonstration of some kind would be helpful. Those flying saucers & tea cups are not impressive...
Lumina wrote: "WTF???"Didn't you say, "Ask this alien anything?"
Whaaa? You're not an alien? Where are the real aliens?
Well, OK, then, you're just an Earthling, and Z28Q, (ZQuteMale), is the only real alien on this thread. He had a request for an Earthling written short story for his school paper or something: "Many people on Earth have misconceptions about Aliens from Outer Space. Maybe someone here has a really short short-story about an alien encounter that they can share here. Maybe I can add it as a reference in my thesis paper"
So what's the question? What in particular don't you understand? Huh???
Huh whaa oh gee uh???? You guys are going to chase away my friend ZQuteMale (Z28Q). I don't think he's going to understand all of these interjections, exclamations, and expletives. If you chase him away back to his home planet I'll never get to know him.Dear ZQuteMale,
On behalf of all of planet Earth, we apologize. Come in out of the rain of scorn, and into my kitchen and I'll make you lunch. And I don't think that Doug's short story was that bad, but if he offended you in anyway, we apologize and we'll force him to take a remedial writing class.
Joyce,What happened here? Did I scare away the alien from outer space? I'm sorry.
Doug,Yes, apparently. That was not your best writing, and now you've brought shame to the entire planet Earth or at least to the English speaking parts. I think you should hide until this blows over. Insulting a visitor from another planet might be a crime of some sort. I don't want to have to visit you in jail. And you should know who is the imposter and who is the real visitor from another galaxy. Don't you ever look up at the real stars in the sky? Or do you just stare at your computer?
Doug, Joyce....I have had intimate communications with alien life forms. These life forms feel shame towards planet Earth and our violent ways. That is why they only visit here on occasion.
I shall converse with my extra terrestrial friend, Lars, and get back to you with her opinions soon.
May the stars shine bright in the sky tonight, and may you both touch the face of interstellar beings.
Dear Joyce,I'm sorry. I must have misunderstood something. Your language is very confusing to me. It's just that my doctoral thesis adviser told me that to be a real Anthropologist I should mingle with the people and not bring any weapons or equipment. This makes me very nervous, and he said not to use any thought transference. I feel like I'm running around blind.
I guess we could do lunch. Seems like you've calmed things down. I don't know if I have this expression right: "I tip my hat to you." I've noticed there's a lot like that. It seems that someone on Earth got his PhD studying talking cats or something like that. I think it's The Cat in the Hat, by Dr. Seuss
The Cat in the Hat
But what does this mean? Only children can talk to cats?
Mod
this thread is super confusing!!but hey if my awesome friends are enjoying over here,am more than glad.love ya alla!enjoy:)
It's not confusing to my alien friend, Lars. I see the point of this thread as she's taught me to see it and all is good. Bree, Awesome...each of you are divine in your own way. Embrace that. Perhaps one day our universe can be as one. Wouldn't that be brilliant?
Mod
am having trouble understanding ur awesome planet but i hope i will soon...right bree?:)
Mod
Yes, you are all divine beings. Hug yourselves and jump for joy.
I've discovered a group of totally awesome people!!
Mod
lol,thanks cosmos..u urself r awesoem thats y u think we all r too:)
So glad I found you guys. You all make me laugh and cheer me up.:)
Question 01
Alien X2478 says:
"Why do you wear your hat cocked to one side instead of straight?