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Week 1: Chapters 1-8
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Yes, it seems to pop in many times and places all over the world.
What did you think of how Bellingham's mother reacted to learning about Ruth? She had to have known that her son had deep character flaws and yet her first instinct was to automatically place all the blame on Ruth, even though he was the one that sought her out. She was so 'offended' yet let his behavior slide.
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Times really haven't changed much. Today, women are blamed when they are raped because they were dressed inappropriately, were drunk, etc. Although there is some punishment, especially if you are black, there is little for white men. See the Stanford case: http://www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la...
It seems like Gaskell is coating the "older" women (e.g. Mrs. Mason as well as Mrs. Bellingham) with a "I forgive my son in all situations" layer. The point when Mrs. Mason encountered Ruth with Mr. Bellingham was preceded by a discussion in the carriage that criticized Mrs. Mason's son (nephew?). However, she diligently defended her son and built an irritation that blew up in Ruth's face. In a similar fashion, Mrs. Bellingham, in a preceding chapter was depicted as being forgiving to her son. Gaskell is seemingly stating that sons are forgiven by the mothers no matter what. I wonder how daughters fare in the same situation?
Regardless, Mrs. Bellingham must have had plenty of time to think about all of this while attending her son's sick bed. Did a similar level of irritation rise within her? Did she blame Ruth for her son's illness and for leading her "innocent" son astray. She surely lashed out at Ruth when she encountered her rather than consider her situation. At the same time I feel as if we know almost nothing about Mrs. Bellingham or her son. They seem to be Victorian stereotypes passing through the story compared to the deep psychological characterizations (Eliot style) of Ruth and the Benson siblings.
I suspect that Mr. Bellingham could do nothing wrong in his mother's eyes. However, it seems like Mr. Bellingham would have acted differently if he was alone or if Mrs. Bellingham had not twisted his arm. He meekly gave up and wished Ruth away, but would he have done so if he wasn't pressured by his mother? It is almost as if he gave up Ruth to avoid a conflict with Mrs. Bellingham? How do you think it would have turned out if Mrs. Bellingham simply tended to her son and avoided the issue of Ruth?
Hmmm, yes, the Stanford case is vexing. Here is another modern example about "rules" for women:In Monday's Guardian:
"Female tourists should not wear skirts in India, says tourism minister"
https://www.theguardian.com/world/201...
you all have it right! Women are still often blamed for being raped in the year 2016! Which is why many women don't report it. Many different Women's groups are trying hard to change this stigma but it will takes one or two more generations I'm afraid. Just like the acceptance of gay marriage and mixed culture marriage, for examples. It takes years of education and opinions change v e r y s l o w l y
Gaskell is certainly highlighting the double standard, by making it so that Mr Bellingham suffers no consequences at all by his behaviour, whereas Ruth is shunned and shamed. Haaze, I think you're right that this is still very much the case in certain cultures today and, I would say, even in relatively progressive cultures, we still judge women much more harshly for sexual transgressions.
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Anastasia Kinderman, The Only
(last edited Sep 01, 2016 04:39PM)
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I would guess that the daughters do not fare as well as the sons. Just look at how Jemima is treated. (view spoiler)
Yes, Mr. Bellingham and his mother seem to mostly exist to further Ruth's story. That's something I found myself wondering, what were things like from his perspective? It would have been nice to see what attitudes and thoughts motivated him to behave the way he did.
He was selfish but didn't have the guts to stand up to his mother. I think if his mother had avoided the subject he would have kept Ruth because then it wouldn't have provoked a conflict. He seemed awfully happy to let his mother just blame Ruth for his transgressions, the coward.
@AnastasiaTrue about Jemima, but her story hasn't unfolded yet. Gaskell seems to say that the behavior of men should be examined more closely. I was saddened by how Gaskell bashed Ruth into her situation at the end of this section. Like an innocent lamb to slaughter. Boo hooo!
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Anastasia Kinderman, The Only
(last edited Sep 01, 2016 04:38PM)
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Sorry, I keep forgetting which section thread I am commenting on.
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Sorry, I keep forgetting which section thread I am commenting on."
I know. We got two long threads discussing this book.
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Sorry, I keep forgetting which section thread I am commenting on."
I know. We got two long threads..."
A wonderful problem to have!
Women's Classic Literature Enthusiasts
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I agree! Not only are they forgiven, but the women are blamed for enticing the men in the first place!!! Grrrrrr! Unfortunately, this is such an eternal theme.