The First Time She Drowned by Kerry Kletter → Start Date: June 2nd, 2016

[Katie]

Nicole and I will be reading this. Anyone may join.

[Nicole - Too Weird To Live, Too Rare To Die-]

This sounds pretty good with a hard topic

[Vicki]

I'll join. This one looks really good.

[Katie]

Yep, I agree that it does look good.

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

I have this one. I hope to get a few chapters read today and then I'll post
this one looks so good!

[Katie]

I read a lot of this on a car ride yesterday, but I forgot to post thoughts, so I'll post them now. I read through chapter 35.

Cassie's mom (view spoiler)[I do not like her and how she seems abusive to Cassie and always is nicer to Matthew. The only thing about her is that her mother seemed awful to her too, so I think it may be a learned behavior. That doesn't mean it excuses her behavior though. (hide spoiler)]

Matthew (view spoiler)[I feel like he seemed to be a good guy and a good brother when Cassie was a little kid, but when she got older, Matthew turned to the mother's side. (hide spoiler)]

Cassie's dad (view spoiler)[I feel like he is made out to be worse than he is. I think he tries to be a good father, but doesn't know how to protect Cassie from her mom. But everyone in the family acts like he is such an awful guy. (hide spoiler)]

Billy (view spoiler)[I wonder what was going on when he kept saying he was worried about Cassie. (hide spoiler)]

Zoey (view spoiler)[She seems to be a really good friend for Cassie. I really like her. (hide spoiler)]

Chris (view spoiler)[He seems like a nice guy. And he still likes Cassie even when she messes up things with him. (hide spoiler)]

[Vicki]

I'll try to start today or tomorrow. How is it so far, Katie?

[Katie]

I really like it so far. It's a tough read because it's about tough topics, but it's easy to get into it.

[Vicki]

Thanks, Katie. I need a good one!

[Amanda]

I just got this from the library last night. I will join in, I plan on starting this tonight.

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

Yay! Welcome Amanda! I was just telling Vicki how on top of your books you and katie both are! LOL

[Amanda]

Aww thanks. I'm usually behind on my books, but lately I've been flying through them.

[Amanda]

15 chapters.

Cassie (view spoiler)[so far we only know how Cassie viewed things that happened. It would be hard to be sent to a mental institution and then have your family rarely visit you. If her mother really did send her there to have her out of the way because she wasn't the daughter she wanted that is really awful. So far from what we have seen the mother seems to favor Matthew over everyone in the family. I hope that Cassie can find a way to adjust, it's going to be hard given how long she was locked away from the outside world. (hide spoiler)]

Zoey (view spoiler)[I like her so far and am glad she was there to help Cassie get medical help when she had pneumonia. I hope she will be a good friend for Cassie. (hide spoiler)]

[Amanda]

35 chapters.

Cassies mom (view spoiler)[I really don't like her. I get that she had a rotten childhood herself, but that doesn't mean it's okay for her to treat her daughter the same way. She also brings misery onto herself, she seems to be in a loving marriage, but she wants to hate her husband so much and blame him for her unhappiness and then in turn take that out on her daughter. Now that Cassie is going to her alma mater she expects Cassie to be the daughter she always wanted and that everything that happened between them is in the past, I don't think she deserves to be forgiven so easily. (hide spoiler)]

Cassies Dad (view spoiler)[I feel bad for him, nothing he ever did was good enough for his wife, she always viewed him as a failure. He tried hard to be there and the mom was always trying to turn the children against him, which unfortunately she succeeded in, especially concerning Matthew. I do wish he was home more to see what the mother was doing to Cassie and that he was able to protect her better. (hide spoiler)]

Billy (view spoiler)[I think that it's unfortunate that he noticed that Cassie was having a problem in that moment and when he tried to talk to her mother she shows how selfish she really is. You could see he was concerned for her and I wish he could have helped her. I am thinking someone hurt her, possibly Aunt Dora? (hide spoiler)]

Zoey (view spoiler)[she seems to be a good friend for Cassie. (hide spoiler)]

Chris (view spoiler)[I like him, but I wish that Cassie would stop trying to push him away. I worry that the way her mother treated her father will affect her relationships. (hide spoiler)]

Cassie (view spoiler)[I am glad that she is talking to the school counselor I think that it will help her. (hide spoiler)]

[Amanda]

Finished.

Cassie (view spoiler)[her struggle was so sad but hopeful by the end. I am glad that she is starting to distance herself from her mother and the destructive behavior she has. It was so sad when she found out that James died. I did not see that coming even though it was foreshadowed when he told her not to become a statistic. I am glad that she made friends and that she is talking to the school counselor, it will be good for her to have someone who will listen to her and that will believe her. (hide spoiler)]

Mother (view spoiler)[I couldn't get over her complete selfish, narcissistic, manipulative behavior. I hated her reaction after learning about what Dora did to her daughter, but I was not surprised at all either. She really did love to blame Cassie for everything that went wrong in her life. To blame Cassie for the affair that she started was terrible. Honestly I was glad when the father filed for divorce. (hide spoiler)]

I really enjoyed this book, it was hard to read at times, but so worth it at the end.

[Vicki]

Behind AGAIN. One day I hope to be back on top of my game again!

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

I'm so sorry we missed you Amanda.

Vicki, are you interested in rescheduling??

[Amanda]

No worries :)

I'll check back in when you guys start. I can't wait to see what you guys think.

[Vicki]

Trisha wrote: "I'm so sorry we missed you Amanda.

Vicki, are you interested in rescheduling??"

Trisha, I'm sorry I missed this message, but I would like to reschedule. I'll be on vacation until June 9 but I will be reading! I'll definitely take the book with me but if you see this message in time (I leave Monday morning early) let's schedule it for this week if possible. If not and we need to schedule it for later, I own it so that's okay too.

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

Yeah, anytime!! Do you want to read it next week?
Just pick a day!

[Vicki]

How is Thursday?

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

Perfect!!

[Vicki]

Yay!!! We arrived in San Diego about 2 hours ago. It's so beautiful here and the weather is perfect! So Thursday it is!

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

yay! I've been to San Diego once! I loved it! I hope you have fun!

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

Finally have the book again...but I'm still prepping for camp this week
so it took up most of my day
I'll start tomorrow ;)

[Vicki]

Did you have a chance to start yet?

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

ugh....nope.
sorry. definitely will tomorrow though
Day camp starts tomorrow....so I had all this week to really prep and get ready for it :) next week I'm back to reading! yay!

[Vicki]

No worries! I haven't been able to start it either.

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

how's your vacation going??

[Vicki]

Awesome! I had lunch with my friend Lee Fullbright, a great visit with my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, I've had time with one of my daughters and 4 of my grandkids, lots of good food, lol but not much sunshine. My husband is currently barbecuing chicken and corn on the cob and my daughter just took her two girls down to the beach. We are really enjoying our time. :)

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

yay! I'm so glad you are!!
we're part way into Girl Scout camp....our first one this summer - we have 3 total and one family vacation planned...

so I've started this book..but only made it through the epilogue and chapter one

but I"m exhausted.....camp was so tiring today (and so hot!)
I think I'm going to crash but I'll read more tomorrow at camp during any down time I have :)

[Vicki]

Chapter 15

This book is heart-wrenching to me. I am completely taken aback by (view spoiler)[Cassie's mother! (hide spoiler)]

Cassie (view spoiler)[has been in an unbelievably awful situation. I don't know what she did that caused her mother to put her in the mental institute OR do it the way she did. I'm appalled! I can't even imagine how very lonely and alone she must have felt in that place. I cannot believe that her mother never even visited her really. What an awful mother. (hide spoiler)]

Cassie's mother (view spoiler)[is simply despicable!! Not only did she put her in that place but she has been so mean to her and played obvious favorites with Cassie's brother. I hate that for her and for the brother, actually. (hide spoiler)]

Cassie's parents (view spoiler)[both have taken part in the treatment of Cassie. For the parents to both play favorites or at least for the dad to allow it, it really is a very sad family dynamic. I was pretty disgusted too when Cassie's mother wanted her son to sleep with her and her husband to sleep with Cassie. Say what? I'm not sure at what age they were but that seemed SO out of whack to me, especially when the dad told the mother that she treated their son more like her husband. Ugh! (hide spoiler)]

James (view spoiler)[is hilarious and I'm really glad she had him while in the institution. I hope something good happens for him. (hide spoiler)]

Zoey (view spoiler)[is really cool too. I like how she is trying to make friends with Cassie and how she helped her when she got so sick. I think she'll be a really good friend. (hide spoiler)]

Aunt Dora (view spoiler)[might have a bark worse than her bite. I like how she read to Cassie, but she needs to get that girl some candy! (hide spoiler)]

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

alright 15 chapters

I think(view spoiler)[ this is all just so odd right now. I think Cassie''s constant need to be around her mom is skewed. she just feels so unreliable. and why does she have so much missing time? (hide spoiler)]

Aunt Dora(view spoiler)[ I'm wondering if she really did make the candy comment.......it was odd, the way she acted.
also...where did the missing chunk of time go? and why was Cassie so horribly sad afterwards. She didn't like Dora, why would she be sad she was gone
I think something happened that we don't know about yet (hide spoiler)]

James(view spoiler)[ I know, I really liked him too but I'm sad he didn't come with her. makes me nervous. I feel like Cassie is so unreliable, I'm not sure what to make of James. he seemed like such a good friend. (hide spoiler)]

Zoey(view spoiler)[ I really liked her too. Cassie is really blowing her opportunity at college. I hope Zoey helps her get back on track (hide spoiler)]

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

35 chapters

her mom (view spoiler)[ this whole book just feels so odd to me. these memories and the situations just don't make sense.
why would her mom keep going home? why is she making her husband so miserable? where did her brother go? where did her little brother go? why would her mom really send her to college when she ignored her for years? why would the college really accept her?
why was her uncle worried? why was her family constantly high? the whole book just feels so ridiculously over the top that I'm not liking it and I keep thinking Cassie has just completely fabricated her childhood (hide spoiler)]

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

I'm done

I hate(view spoiler)[ that I didn't love this one. but I thought the family smoking pot and being so over the top abusive to her mom
and then her mom's abuse to be SO over the top - I felt it took away from the message. Abuse doesn't have to be so grandiose and extreme in order to be abuse. it can be subtle and awful and still be abuse (hide spoiler)]

[Vicki]

I have to agree with you that there were SO many questions that didn't make sense to me either. I thought more would be answered for me but they weren't.

Also abuse is definitely (view spoiler)[more often than not, more subtle. Many people say, "I'm not being abused. He's never hit me," or things of that nature. It isn't always so grandiose as you said, and it doesn't have to be so in-your-face to be abuse. (hide spoiler)]

[Trisha, lives on coffee]

I am glad you did like this one more than me.
I think if I'd bought it from the get go and didn't have the "this can't possible be this obvious" - I think I would have enjoyed it more.

well....we will definitely enjoy our next ones more :)

[Vicki]

Ha ha,, let's hope so!