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message 1: by Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous! (new)

Kim (mrsnesbitt) | 1031 comments Mod
I like the message in a current Domino's Pizza commercial (leave it to the fat woman to get an idea from a food commercial!;) The idea is that failure IS an option. Hmmm, makes you think for a moment. How many times a day do we set up ourselves for failure? One,twelve, too many to count? During our lifetimes, we and those around us have made mistakes ("and bad mistakes, I've made a few"...) and many of us have learned from them because failure WAS and option.

Everyday we have options put before us, left/right,healthy food/junk food,exercise/no exercise,punch out the wingnut next to you/ keep your temper and bail money, you get the drift. Those are clear options, but many are not so clear,or have been so muddied by our own actions that we cannot see the options at hand. We spend a lot of time making resolutions that we easily break, promises of grand things that we find hard to live up to, and many other grandiose thins that we set up our own failures, yet we don't learn from them and we keep doing them, over and over, punishing ourselves each time we fail.

Quantum physics suggest that there are endless parallel universes, and that we exist in all of them, that all of our history is played out in them and that somewhere in all of those big decisions we make, a new universe is created based on that decision. So, in one universe, Lincoln lived, JFK lived, etc. and all of the history that entails.
Even our small decisions effect the history of ourselves. So, yes,in some universe the love you wished you had held onto is still with you,somewhere there is a thin you,and somewhere you may very well be a clown made of candy.

We have become a "win at all costs" culture and we have no time for losers, wimps or others who slow us down. Instant gratification has subsumed us as whole, with instant banking, bill paying, tap and to technology so you don't have to stop and sign your name to a purchase, one day shipping, and instant videos to your device of choice when you want it, on your schedule.

Yet, no where in any of this do we see failure as an option. Why? Why has failure become such an obscene concept? Why to we not allow ourselves to make mistakes so we can learn from them? Remember when things "built character"? Failure builds character. Failing can make you more determined to do so something if you accept the fact the failure does not mean that you can never do that again. "Get back on the horse" and "try, try again" are valid adages for a reason. Failure is an option, and you need to accept that before you can succeed.

This has been a hard won lesson for me over the years and I am now trying to embrace failure. If I fail, it is not the end of the world,just because I did not succeed this time, doesn't mean I won't later on, with multiple attempts. Are there things I can't do, sure. That does not make ME a failure, but unable to do certain things. I can't slam dunk, or throw a ball very far, but I can swim 3/4 miles at a time, I can bake circles around most people, and I can blow the doors off the building when I sing (ask Narzain about my birthday karaoke).

I did not just get up one day and do all of that, I learned. We need to teach ourselves that if we cheat on our food it is not the end of the world, but we need to make better choices from now on,and learn from how we feel when we eat better from how we feel when we don't. We need to learn that if we are who we are, then we are not failures, but we are wonderful. We are only failures when we do not try at all. As long as you are trying, you are NOT a failure.

message 2: by Narzain (new)

Narzain | 194 comments Failure is absolutely an option. Without the possibility of failure, there can be no success. And, as you mentioned, if one never fails, how can one learn and grow? Case in point: learning to walk. Kids fall down a LOT before they get the whole 'one foot in front of the other and stay vertical' thing down. Nobody says that failure isn't an option for them the first 500 times.

I agree that the current culture is winner-obsessed. Failing at anything is seen as somehow unforgivable. And that attitude makes it a lot harder to do much of anything well; if we can't do it perfectly the first time, we give up. *raises hand* Guilty.

Change things up. Exercise the option to fail every so often; it won't end the world.

message 3: by Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous! (new)

Kim (mrsnesbitt) | 1031 comments Mod
Unless your job is to guard the launch codes, then failure is not so much an option...

message 4: by Narzain (new)

Narzain | 194 comments Oh, it's still an option. A very bad option, but still an option.

message 5: by Kim, Proud Queen of the Fat and Fabulous! (new)

Kim (mrsnesbitt) | 1031 comments Mod
"Failure is the only opportunity to start intelligently."- fortune cookie.

That says it all.

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