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My Life on the Road
Jan—My Life on the Road (2016)
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Post Read: Has this book changed your thoughts or actions in any way?
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I especially liked the idea of the talking circles, which is something I have seen start to appear more and more often as a method in dialogues between people who are for and against refugees.
I'm trying to include this method in my life more regularly and learn from other people.
I'm trying to include this method in my life more regularly and learn from other people.
The contents are somehow disorganized, and i dont appreciate the way she called her mom's life as "unlived" and long pages for political campaigns . But the author does have great stories i skipped lines to read those anecdotes-- the conversations with taxi drivers, and people she had encountered with on the road. The best ones are her dads life--"Her dad turned their plights into the game them could win". Also Wilma Killerman, a highly respected and legendary woman indeed.
The biggest take-away for me was regarding the history of Native Americans and how their inclusive culture differs from European/American culture in many ways. I agree that we can learn a lot from the way they operate both socially and politically, especially concerning the way they view gender. I thought it was very interesting that their society is matrilineal, that women and men are viewed as equally valuable to the society, and that women play an important role in decision-making. This section of the book encouraged me to learn more about this and apply the idea that although gender can be indicative of certain strengths (e.g. childbirth), it does not mean that one gender needs to dominate or be suppressed by another.
I really enjoyed listening to the book on audible instead of reading it. I felt more at one with the author and the message of the book. I loved the book.
I have not finished reading the book, however, I'm enjoying new eye and mind opening insights on topics and people that I have not thought of before. If anything, I feel like this book has somewhat given me the courage to ask questions. This will sound racist, however, I lack the vocabulary for this story below and I'm working on it. I'm Caucasian and I have always wanted to ask an African American about race inequality. I want to know what he or she feels in and around me, the community in which we share. I don't want to live blinded. Who better than to get questions answered than from the source? Today, I finally found the courage to ask someone. I was getting my hair cut at a super cuts today by a lady who was African American. In the middle of my hair cut, I noticed that there was a 8x10 poster on her station of different ways a gentleman could cut or color his hair with photos. There were about a dozen or so of these styles for men, however the most noticeable thing to me was that they were all Caucasian males. To the right of this poster, is a Caucasian female and Caucasian male poster advertising hair products and color. I live in a community in south Florida where there is a mix of African Americans, Hispanics and Caucasians. So, I mustered up the courage to ask my stylist a racial question. After all, I suppose the worst she could do to me would be to say I don't want to discuss it and wreck my hair. I started off with, "I have a question to ask you." I stated," I'm reading Gloria Steinem's new book, My Life on the Road, and in it she discusses a few topics such as feminism and racism." I asked her, " if there are other posters for men who are not Caucasian." She was taken aback by my question I could tell, and I followed up with, "I know not only these type of people get their hair cut here." She responded with, "yes, you mean curly hair. Yes, we have books for people like me." I even felt bad that she kept using the term curly hair to describe herself and people like her. She went on to tell me that "sometimes, men will call hair salons and will be told 'no we don't service people with curly hair or your type of hair'." She then asked if my husband had curly hair, an under tone question for, is your husband African American and I told her no. She responded with, "oh I thought that might be why you're asking." I said, "no I want to learn and I don't want to be blind anymore." She smiled and said, "stereotypical you mean." "Yes," I said, "I'm sorry if my question made you uncomfortable. I've just noticed your poster. They're all the same." She left my hair and went to grab a book and found the page with an African American male on the sheet. She said, "see?" I said, "thank you." Although, as I flipped through the book, he was the ONLY African American in it.
I hope that my experience doesn't offend anyone. I really hope I didn't offend my hair stylist. I'm happy she answered my question. I learned a couple of things in that brief moment in time. I hope I can continue to do so even after I've finished reading Gloria's book. If you're ever in Super Cuts by the way, take a look at the advertising.
Wow thanks for sharing! Brave and enlightening. I bet she will go home and think about your conversation for a very long time.
I haven't finished the book yet, but I love reading about the different kinds of women coming together for the same cause. It has encouraged me to speak up more and point out sexist things I see in my every day life. There are mostly small things (some may say insignificant) but to me they're still annoying...I was buying headphones the other day and saw some on sale. They were all pink or purple and - according to the packing it came in - it was "especially made for women". I thought that was at least worth an eye roll, seeing that the blue and black ones didn't have that label. When the guy at the till asked me if I found everything I was looking for I responded: "Yes, thank god I found the ones especially made for women." He smiled and blushed a little bit.
It's a really small thing but I was kind of proud that I said something because I'm not the most extroverted person.
This book and the stories of the women standing up and fighting for their rights has encouraged me to do the same, one baby step at a time.
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Thank you Katelyn and AJ
I actually learned a lot from the individual experiences that Gloria had with people she met. And I see how it influences others in the world just from reading the comments here. It set into motion how I think I can reach out to others better, and take in others stories or responses with the attention of a good listener.
I also got to learn Gloria visited my hometown for a horse race and won: )
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It set into motio..."
I lived in Baltimore for a couple of years, just moved away this past summer. I miss Maryland so much! <3 It was exciting to read that section having a familiarity with the area!
Besides all the sharp and witty comebacks (like "are you the alternative?" to the question if someone was a lesbian) I think maybe a strange thing I took away so far (I started with the color purple and am still reading Steinems book this month) is this question about chores, and I'm wondering if this is because Switzerland is a little behind on equality things (note the voting right for women in Switzerland that only came 1971 and in the canton Appenzell brought it on quiet unwillingly in 1991). So the strange thing is that personally, I always wanted to prove the classical gender roles wrong, but the way I tried doing so (before knowing much about gender) is quite unusual, I believe. I tried doing this on one side by studying hard and getting into uni, following my father's footsteps and moving towards a job where I wouldn't depend on a man, but on the other side, I tried to keep the female gender role, like I can cook and clean and bake and sew and god knows what else you learn in "house work" classes in Switzerland, to a point where I take a strange pride in having both classical gender roles in me. However, this becomes complicated, when you eventually end up with someone and simple things come up like: you try to divide chores. This is very very hard for me, because I'm so used to showing that I can do both, so I'm torn. On one hand I want to do everything, because I know I can, however on the other hand I don't want to become my mother who cleans up after my father. So I have this seemingly huge internal struggle of "does it hurt my pride if I let him help me clean -- but why would I think this, I am a young independent woman, and he should of COURSE help me, and do his part". And then Gloria says in her book to imagine your partner as a woman, and imagine how you would divide chores, and not to lower your expectations. And my mind was blown. I mean, I kept thinking "why, how was this even a problem", but it was. And this is just one tiny struggle I've been having since I've been learning more about gender inequality and equality a few years ago, it's like un-learning to do ... things!
I think that what I want to take back from Gloria's book is the fact that I need to keep up listening stories, listening people and trying to keep standing up for the causes I believe in.I don't know yet how I want to change things at my level, but I know, with the two books that I want to do something, get involved in some way :)
I finished this last night. I enjoyed Steinem's travels and the insight each one (not to mention the oodles of others she has in her mind) brought about was a great thing, a learning experience, a call to action. We as citizens should be traveling more, enriching our lives and the lives of those around us, and seeking change and progress in all of it. I appreciated her quotes (there were SO many good ones, am I right?!) and her way of simplifying the complex."One of the simplest paths to deep change is for the less powerful to speak as much as they listen, and for the more powerful to listen as much as they speak."
(Content warning: sexual violence) I have yet to read this book but I read OPs post and what was said about Wikipedia reminded me of an article I read (I believe on xojane) written by a woman working for Wikipedia and her experiences. What stuck with me the most from that article was that she would look up movie synopses on Wikipedia and change it from saying "sex scene" to "rape scene" for many movies and tv shows. This is one example of why a women's perspectives are vital, even in the most taken for granted things such as Wikipedia.
I have yet to finish the book because I had borrowed it from my public library and I had to return it because someone else has requested it. Reading My Life on the Road has raised serious matters about women's rights to me. Steinem wrote this book so beautifully and I enjoyed reading about her "life on the road".
I think that after reading (to the last page that I could get to lol) the book that it has changed my whole perspective of feminism and women speaking up. I have always been aware of the inequality between the two sexes and I felt that since recently, women have been speaking up and pressing their opinions in things that mattered or subjects that they cared about. However, I realized that we still have a lot of work to do. Not every women is voicing their opinions because they are scared or don't have the confidence to. We need to change that, thus I will speak up even louder and clearer to show women that we can speak our minds and demand for respect in the classroom, the workplace, etc.
I really enjoyed to read the book! What a woman. Full of stories... I just think that she could speak more positively of her mother... She chose to be with her children and that takes a lot of courage! But I just loved the book!
Anja wrote: "I especially liked the idea of the talking circles, which is something I have seen start to appear more and more often as a method in dialogues between people who are for and against refugees.I'm..."
I haven't heard of Talking Circles here in Austria concerning the refugees, tho I hope they will start them. A Talking Circle is different to the kind of audience-speaker experience. Tbh, if children/teenagers gather at a place, they inadvertantly make a Talking Circle. So, I think it is interesting that not everyone does that, every community.
I must say this book has given me hope, that we truly can change the world, if only we push hard enough for it.
Also, it has shown me other bits of pre-Columbian America and I only more love Indian country, and way of living. Anybody saying Indians were not intellectual, and technological, and, tbh, way more like us than we get taught in school, is in denial or simply lying.
Additionally, it has only strengthened my view that it is better to use public means of transport. Not only is it more environmentally-friendly, but it also connects oneself more with life, with the people around ourselves. And therefore we can learn more. I definitely want my parents to read this book, and my Head teacher in high school ( I'm borrowing the Harry Potter term since I don't know any other term for it). They're all inadvertant feminists and I hope they can become feminists with this book.
I agree with what AJ said, "...only men spoke. If women had spoken up at that rally, many different stories would have emerged." And also, I agreed that perspectives and assets that females bring to the table in the workplace, communities, and at social groups are important. Thoughts & themes of being assertive, strong, & speaking up resonated with me, from other discussion posts. Well-written & thought out, all!
My question to you is - after reading, are there any ideas or things that you have changed or will do differently?
One thing that this book brought together for me, and I wanted to share because it is something we all have the power to do - Gloria states in an early chapter that during the MLK rally in DC, only men spoke. If women had spoken up at that rally, many different stories would have emerged. "If women had been half of the speakers in 1963 we might have heard that the civil rights movement was partly a protest against the ritualistic rape and terrorizing of black women by white men. We might have known that Rosa Parks had been assigned to by NAACP to investigate the gang rape of a black woman by white men..." {pg. 43}
I was at a woman's breakfast recently and one of the female speakers mentioned that today, women contribute to Wikipedia 10% or less, the rest of it is male contributions. It hit me when I read that in the book why this was so important to acknowledge. A woman's perspective and voice needs to be a part of history, it significantly changes it. Today there is at best a 50% or less understanding of many historical perspectives. If nothing else, something as small as making a wiki update can be a powerful act of sharing your voice and adding a much needed understanding of our history.
My resolution: to update and add my voice to the online Wikipedia community. :)