Hook Writing Challenge

[Teri]

One thing I have been learning a lot about lately, is the wide range/ types of hooks, active hooks, to work into writing.

So, I have been trying to practice writing hooks, better-active writing... and I have found this is one thing that many indie-writers, and new writers tend to miss.

How to add a bit of flair to an ordinary sentence, that hooks the reader to find out more.

this is especially fun, and challenging in paranormal writing:)

Sam went around the corner and picked up the box.

an ordinary sentence. so challenge is-- what can you do with the sentence that catches and holds the readers attention:)

[Teri]

All of his friends had abandoned him as bonkers. Now, Sam hovered by the corner, wondering why no one else had noticed the softly glowing box. It had been sitting there for hours, pulsing away. Finally, he was convinced no one was going to claim this mysterious package. He meandered over to it, as inconspicuously as possible, and scooped it up- Destiny had decided to change his life. The Unknown just became his new best friend.

[J.D.]

How far from the original sentence are you allowed to stray? For example:

Sam peeked around the corner before dashing across the room, scooping the box up from the floor and narrowly avoiding the bolts of lighting being flung in his direction.

I know, it's long. Long sentences are one of my dirty habits. :)

[Teri]

J.D. wrote: "How far from the original sentence are you allowed to stray? For example:

Sam peeked around the corner before dashing across the room, scooping the box up from the floor and narrowly avoiding the ..."

looks good. I don't think there are limits, within reason. Mine ended up being 4-5 sentences? I suppose later, as other hook challenges develop- we can try advanced hook challenges, that limit to 2 sentences?

although for a hook, you need to build a curiosity, rather than just bold-writing.. so what if, something like... narrowly missing the first of several bolts of lightning? --

in that snippet, he has escaped the danger, and there could be a stronger curiosity about whether someone- who?- did the flinging..? but leaving something open, of question, or danger or time, that forces the reader to need to continue;) doesn't have to be cosmic... a hook gets the reader to the next sentence, or paragraph.. draws them in...:)

[Teri]

J.D. wrote: "How far from the original sentence are you allowed to stray? For example:

Sam peeked around the corner before dashing across the room, scooping the box up from the floor and narrowly avoiding the ..."

and I know mine also needs... more. lol:)

[Aaron]

Sam could see the mist of his breath flow in front of him, yet the room was not cold. He was close.
He rounded the next corner and stopped, licking his cracked lips, using droplets of salty sweat to do so. He had found it. Two tentative steps forward and he reached the box.
'Finally,' he thought, reaching both hands out. 'I can finish what I started.'
He prized open the great seal and felt the corners of his mouth turn into a smile.
"I will have my revenge"